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Well I just got this call but being annoyed may not give it verbatim b ut you will see it..
Me= yours truly
AP = Angry Priest
Me = Thank you for Calling "Large Cable Company", may I have the phone number on your account please?
AP = Why do I have to give the number again? Is your system that incapable of remembering a simple phone number?
Me = No sir, we just deployed our billing system and it sometimes does have bugs in it.
AP = Well you need to get more organized. This is rediculous.
Me= I apologize sir what seems to be the issue?
AP = I am AP from the Unknown Catholic Church and I have no picture on my tv in my room.
AP = You sound like an intelligent one, your the sixth one I have spoken to, some refuse to send me to a supervisor "notes incidated supervisor not available", everyone else is incompetent there. I have several parisoners(?) that are in the corporate level of your company I may just have to speak to them to get this resolved.
Me = I do apologize for that, let me check the converters on your account to determine what seems to be the problem
AP = I have no pictures on all channels.
Me= Alright just to make sure, do you have a the tv on channel 3, I know it sounds like a simple solution but make sure of that.
AP= If I am trying to change the channel, its obviously on channel 3, so why would I not have it on channel 3?
*me not wanting to get into an argument with this already pissed customer*
Me = Yes sir, the next thing I need you to do is reboot the box by unplugging it and plugging it back in that sometimes does resolve picture issues.
AP = The other incompetent rep already did that so I won't do it again.
Me = Alright sir, the next step for you to do is to bypass the box by plugging the cable directly from the wall to the TV.
AP = What?
Me = Reiterates
AP = What?
Me = Reiterates
AP = Thats too complicated and rediculous, I have to move all my cables and so forth.
Me = Alright sir you do not have to do that. I will however have to schedule a tech out to check the signals for problems.
AP = That would mean I would have to cancel my appointments and to schedule one with you.
Me = Yes sir, cause there is a limited amount of things I can remotely do to your equipment. The problem can be one of two things. Your box is bad or that the signal issue for your room needs to be checked.
AP = I just got the box in janurary so it shouldn't go bad.
Me = Well sir then it could be the signal and I would have to send a tech out. I am unable to check the signal from here.
AP = This is ridculous *click*
O_O, you would think he would have been more polite, I understand not having services but you do not have to assume everyones incompetent and yell at the CSR.
Me= yours truly
AP = Angry Priest
Me = Thank you for Calling "Large Cable Company", may I have the phone number on your account please?
AP = Why do I have to give the number again? Is your system that incapable of remembering a simple phone number?
Me = No sir, we just deployed our billing system and it sometimes does have bugs in it.
AP = Well you need to get more organized. This is rediculous.
Me= I apologize sir what seems to be the issue?
AP = I am AP from the Unknown Catholic Church and I have no picture on my tv in my room.
AP = You sound like an intelligent one, your the sixth one I have spoken to, some refuse to send me to a supervisor "notes incidated supervisor not available", everyone else is incompetent there. I have several parisoners(?) that are in the corporate level of your company I may just have to speak to them to get this resolved.
Me = I do apologize for that, let me check the converters on your account to determine what seems to be the problem
AP = I have no pictures on all channels.
Me= Alright just to make sure, do you have a the tv on channel 3, I know it sounds like a simple solution but make sure of that.
AP= If I am trying to change the channel, its obviously on channel 3, so why would I not have it on channel 3?
*me not wanting to get into an argument with this already pissed customer*
Me = Yes sir, the next thing I need you to do is reboot the box by unplugging it and plugging it back in that sometimes does resolve picture issues.
AP = The other incompetent rep already did that so I won't do it again.
Me = Alright sir, the next step for you to do is to bypass the box by plugging the cable directly from the wall to the TV.
AP = What?
Me = Reiterates
AP = What?
Me = Reiterates
AP = Thats too complicated and rediculous, I have to move all my cables and so forth.
Me = Alright sir you do not have to do that. I will however have to schedule a tech out to check the signals for problems.
AP = That would mean I would have to cancel my appointments and to schedule one with you.
Me = Yes sir, cause there is a limited amount of things I can remotely do to your equipment. The problem can be one of two things. Your box is bad or that the signal issue for your room needs to be checked.
AP = I just got the box in janurary so it shouldn't go bad.
Me = Well sir then it could be the signal and I would have to send a tech out. I am unable to check the signal from here.
AP = This is ridculous *click*
O_O, you would think he would have been more polite, I understand not having services but you do not have to assume everyones incompetent and yell at the CSR.
Channel 26 is moldy! 
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