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Enjoy your ticket
Old 08-02-2020, 07:21 PM
evilhomer's Avatar
evilhomer evilhomer is offline
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,492
Default Enjoy your ticket

There is a small town that I pass through on the way to the cottage. Literally every weekend, there is a local cop doing radar on this main street. With this in mind, I always obey the speed limit passing through this town.

I'm approaching this town doing a reasonable 10 kph above the limit. This assclown comes flying up behind me and starts riding my ass. He can easily and legally go around me, but he wants to be an asshole so he just continues to tailgate me. This carries on for a couple minutes until we reach the start of the small town I know about where the speed drops. I lower my speed to the lowered limit and this prompts my buddy to get within inches of my bumper. I choose not to engage him, instead I signal and pull into the shoulder. He floors it and flies past me. I get back on the road and carry on. I get past the bend in the road and I'm on the main street and see those beautiful red white and blue lights flashing. This assclown got nailed, I would guess at least 30 kph above the limit, maybe even 50 kph or more. I pass by giving a little toot of the horn and a smile and wave. I don't think I've ever seen anyone more furious

You want to speed, be my guest. But don't harass and bully the guy who is driving (more) legally. Because if that guy has a chance to screw you, he just might.
Quoth = Crossbow "EvilHomer, Irv, Gravekeeper, and Seraph: the Four Horsemen of the Dumbpocalypse."
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Old 08-03-2020, 08:10 PM
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drunkenwildmage drunkenwildmage is offline
Professional Geek
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: ARCAville
Posts: 523

A few years ago, I had a guy in a Stupid Useless Vehicle tailgate me going through a 1 lane construction Zone on I75 just north of Dayton around 5:00am. We cleared zone, and I moved to the right lane to let him pass. He floored it just as I saw the reflection of a Ohio Highway Patrol decal in the darkness on the right. The cruiser pulled out behind me, then passed, and turned on his pretty blue strobe lights to invite the SUV driver for a quick 'chat' on the site of the road

Just sliding down the razor blade of life.
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Old 08-04-2020, 06:09 PM
Buzzard Buzzard is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 823

I remember one fondly...
I was heading in to work on an absolutely jam-PACKED freeway, working my way through a dense clog. Traffic is already going a very noticeable (by the officer) bit over the limit, and I've got this asshat tailgating me HARD. I manage to get out in front of the clog enough to change lanes and get out of asshat's way, and he promptly nails the throttle to the floor. What he DIDN'T notice while he was so hot on my ass was the odd two-tone coloring of the car behind him, or the funny roof rack full of lights...
Yup, there's nothing like giving the officer a present. I laughed hard for the rest of the commute in, with periodic chuckle breaks during my shift.
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Old 08-05-2020, 04:15 PM
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Rosco the Iroc Rosco the Iroc is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: NE PA, USA
Posts: 1,103

RT-13 in Delaware in the 90's not very built up. It was 55 and dropped right to 35 in the little towns, one was just a single light cross road. But they had lots o cops and would sit literally behind the welcome to sigh and point the radar gun between the legs.
So I'm in my Camaro, with a plate from that sad "get in, sit down, shut up and hang on!" Hugh CB antenna that I used. I would run 10-20 over till I'd hit these towns, now you see me winging my way down the hiway suddenly do exactly the speed limit and right lane
Do you go..humm he knows something and look out?
Or honk, and speed by?
Yep people would take #2 and one guy got lit up before he even fully passed me. I was worried they would get us confused and pull me over but they got the right guy. LOL
Sarcasm dear, sarcasm. Im well aware that dealing with civilians in any capacity will skin your faith in humanity alive, then pickle anything that remains so as to watch it shrivel up into an immortal husk thus reminding you of how dead inside you now are.
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Old 08-05-2020, 05:46 PM
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dalesys dalesys is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Salsa Lake City, UT, USA
Posts: 7,195

I love it when other people go and celebrate "Christmas Time!" without me.
I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.
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Old 08-14-2020, 02:47 AM
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Bandit Bandit is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Frozen bits, ON
Posts: 728

I live outside a "dot on the map" small town and go through many others on a major highway to get to anything even close to a city. Like Rosco, I drive a muscle car over the summer, and I like to drive <ahem> "enthusiastically".

I learned many years ago to take the speed limits through the "dot on the map" towns really seriously and have lost count of how many people I've seen pulled over for driving like asses in those small towns. Like if I'm stomping on the binders early enough to make sure my speed is the number on the sign +/- 5km/h, there's probably a good reason for it.

I just have to point and giggle at them.

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."- Albert Einstein.
I never knew how happy paint could make people until I started selling it.
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Old 08-14-2020, 03:29 AM
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EricKei EricKei is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Wandering Greyhawk
Posts: 10,175

My brother used to live in an area where the speed limit on a highway overpass dropped from 55 to 45, then to 35, with the 35 sign less than a minute after the 45 sign, along a decent curve. Yes, it was set up so that you would have a hard time seeing the 35 sign in time to slow down; and yes, cops would lurk and nail people *right where the sign was posted* if they didn't drop enough speed in time. We figured out pretty quickly that all you had to do was to let go of the accelerator as soon as the 45 sign heaved into view (downward slope) – If you were doing 55~60 at that point, you'd hit 45 just as you reached that sign, and 35 just as you reached the later sign
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