Groaners

[iradney]

Three old ladies sitting on a bench in a park. Suddenly, a young man rushes up to them and flashes them! The first old lady has a stroke! The second old lady has a stroke! The third old lady can't reach...

[MadMike]

Three hard-of-hearing old ladies are sitting on a park bench.

"Windy, isn't it?" asks the first.

"No, it's Thursday!" answers the second.

"Me too," says the third, "Let's go get a drink!"

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

My groaner for the day....

You have two potatoes. How do you tell which one is the prostitute?













You look for the label that says "Idaho"!

[DarthRetard]

The credit for this one goes to monty python......

What's brown and like a bell?

Duuuuuuuuuuuung.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Anybody hear the latest joke for psychics?

No?

Okay! Here it is:

[BlaqueKatt]

I had to name my pet pig Ink-

He kept running out of his pen

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Oh yeah?!

My parents bought me a dog for protection once. He was a wonderful dog. One time when I got held up, he sat and watched. He was a watchdog.

Most people name their dogs something "Fido" or "Rover". I named my dog "sex".

One day I took Sex for a walk, and he ran away from me. I spent all day looking for him. A cop came up to me and asked me "What are you doing in this alley at 3:00 in the morning?"

I told him "I'm looking for Sex". That wasn't much fun to explain to the judge.

One day I went to get a license for my dog. I told the clerk "I'd like to get a license for Sex." He said, "I'd like to have one too!"

Then I told him "But this is the dog!" The clerk told me he didn't care how she looked.

I then said "But I've had Sex since I was three years old!"

When I got divorced from my wife, we went to court for custody of the dog. I told the Judge, "Your Honor, I had Sex before we were married!" He said "So did I!"

I then told him that after we married, Sex left me. He said "Me too!"

When I told him I once had Sex on TV, he said "Show-off!" I them told the Judge it was a contest, and he said I should have sold tickets.

I also told the judge that when we got married, on our honeymoon I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for my wife, and a special room for Sex. He told me "All our rooms are for sex!"

"But you don't understand!" I said to the clerk. "Sex keeps me awake at night!" He said "Me too!"

I give up.

[Broomjockey]

Did you hear about the two guys who robbed the calendar factory?


They each got six months!

[Sphinx]

Omg am I wrong for loving these kind of jokes??

[MadMike]

Two morons decided to go hunting for bears. They were walking along a road, when the road forked. At the fork was a sign that said "Bear left."

So they went home.