Go Home, Customers, You're Dumb.

[Gaki]

I'm pretty sure this guy knew he was stupid after I got done with him.

SC: I'd like to prepay on pump nine.
Me: Pump nine is actually broken right now.
SC: ....is there a SIGN?
Me: Well we don't have signs for what's wrong with that pump. See the normal thing we do is we put a bag over the pump handle but a woman drove away with the pump handle in her car so there is no pump handle.
SC: Well a SIGN WOULD REALLY HELP WITH THAT.
Me: There's no pump handle. That's a pretty big sign.

A guy sets down a coffee. I hit the "coffee button."

Me: X.XX
SC: Oh wait, I have this too. *He pulls out one of our order slips that prints out, I scan it while it's still in his hand but he doesn't set it down, he puts it back in his pocket.*
Me: Y.YY.
SC: *Pays then stares at his change.* Wait...
Me:
SC: Why did you charge me for the coffee? It's on the slip.
Me: ...for the love of.......*refund X.XX*

Stop me if I'm wrong but doesn't "too" mean "also?" For serious. I just scan stuff and tell you the total. I don't have time to go searching through your entire food order on my screen to find your coffee. If you put the slip down on the counter FIRST I'll look through THAT to see if it has your drink on it. But setting your drink down FIRST and then not even giving me your slip is a good way to get double charged for a drink. I don't have time to go scrolling through your order on the screen for a billion years because you ordered half the deli and your coffee is somewhere in the middle.

For the last time...we're a gas station, not the BON TON.

Do you sell hats?
Do you sell T-shirts?
Do you have ear muffs?
Do you sell anything other than these manly work gloves?
Are these novelty earrings hypoallergenic?

Pens: Rare creatures.

SC: Can I borrow your pen.
Me: Only if you promise to bring it back.
SC: *laughs* Like you don't have fifty back there.
Me: Actually that's the only one and I stole it from an old man who left it on the counter.
SC: ...uh.
Me: People steal our pens. I'll need that one back or I'll be having everyone sign their AmEx receipts with the counterfeit pen.
SC: ...oh. *uses pen and hands it back.*
Me: Thank you very much.

Cold.

SC: Your coffee is a little cold.
CoWorker: It's fresh.
SC: It is?
CW: Yep. Just made it.
SC: Well it's cold.
CW: *lifts up the top and steam rises out.*
SC:
CW: Doesn't look cold.

It was probably the over half a cup of COLD creamer she put in there.

It's an epidemic.

SC: Your large lids don't fit on your large cups. You might want to let someone at corporate know.
Me: That's weird, that's the second time I've heard that. *I take the lid and the cup from her and pop the lid on with ease.* But they fit for me.
SC: Oh. That's weird. I just could not get them on.
Me: Well...you're not the only one.

I hope they don't breed.

Answering the Phone in a Hurricane.

SC: Do you have batteries?
Me: Yes.
SC: D batteries?
Me: No.
SC: *huffy* Well you should have said that in the first place!
Me: You didn't specify. *click*

SC: Do you have milk?
Me: Yes.
SC: *click*

SC: Can I know what the winning numbers for the three and four digits was?
Me: No. *click*

SC: Do you have a back up generator for your store?
Me: No. We have 15 minutes of back up power for registers only and then we close.
SC: Well SOMEONE told me that you have a generator.
Me: We don't.
SC: You don't really KNOW, do you?
Me: Ma'am I've been here in a power outage before. We don't have back up generators or anything of that nature. We close the store.
SC: Well then why would someone tell me that you had back up?
Me: Do you know the name of the gentleman that told you that?
SC: No...but...
Me: Are you sure you're even calling the right store?
SC: OF COURSE!
Me: Well whoever told you that was wrong.
SC: But the BIGGER stores....
Me: We are NOT a truck stop store. [Location 1] and [Location 2] would be the stores to ask about that. As far as I know, none of the stores has a back-up of any kind. Thank you and have a nice day. *click*

Thank god she didn't call back. I have no idea why she needed to know that, we didn't even lose power at all so in the end the point was moot.

[fireheart]

Pens: Rare creatures.

SC: Can I borrow your pen.
Me: Only if you promise to bring it back.
SC: *laughs* Like you don't have fifty back there.
Me: Actually that's the only one and I stole it from an old man who left it on the counter.
SC: ...uh.
Me: People steal our pens. I'll need that one back or I'll be having everyone sign their AmEx receipts with the counterfeit pen.
SC: ...oh. *uses pen and hands it back.*
Me: Thank you very much.

Thank god someone remembered.

I am guilty of walking off with people's pens....this is probably the reason why I don't sign a lot of credit card receipts....

[Mr. Anubite]

Thank god someone remembered.

I am guilty of walking off with people's pens....this is probably the reason why I don't sign a lot of credit card receipts....

I do that ALL THE TIME! It's completely unintentional, I promise!

[pzychobitch]

I work at a petrol station and I feel your pain. *sends plenty of hugs and a few of your chosen alcoholic drinks* (if you dont drink, then I'll just send more hugs!)

[wolfie]

SC: Your large lids don't fit on your large cups. You might want to let someone at corporate know.
Me: That's weird, that's the second time I've heard that. *I take the lid and the cup from her and pop the lid on with ease.* But they fit for me.
SC: Oh. That's weird. I just could not get them on.
Me: Well...you're not the only one.

That is actually a problem at Flying J. After they got bought out by Pilot, corporate switched to a new "universal" (shows both logos) foam cup design for the 2 chains. No problem at Pilot - they had used foam cups pre-merger. Flying J, however, used rigid cups pre-merger. For some reason, many Flying J locations are still getting the lids designed for the old cups, with interrupted "divots" to click under the rim of the rigid cup, instead of the lids with a continuous crimp to grip the lip of the foam cup. The old-style lids can be forced on, but due to the interrupted "divots", when the drink sloshes, it leaks down the outside of the cup.

[BroSCFischer]

Knowing what its like to have people steal pens from me, I have been known to be half way to my car, notice that I still have a cashiers pen, and walk back in and return it.

SC

[PepperElf]

That is actually a problem at Flying J. After they got bought out by Pilot, corporate switched to a new "universal" (shows both logos) foam cup design for the 2 chains. No problem at Pilot - they had used foam cups pre-merger. Flying J, however, used rigid cups pre-merger. For some reason, many Flying J locations are still getting the lids designed for the old cups, with interrupted "divots" to click under the rim of the rigid cup, instead of the lids with a continuous crimp to grip the lip of the foam cup. The old-style lids can be forced on, but due to the interrupted "divots", when the drink sloshes, it leaks down the outside of the cup.

hmm i didn't know that.

although at least all those clothing questions for the hats, shirts, gloves would have different answers. heck the one here even has showers. i think i even saw a 12-volt crockpot for slow-cooked food on the go. (actually I thought that was pretty inventive cos not all truckers want fast food)

[taxguykarl]

SC: Well SOMEONE told me that you have a generator.
Me: We don't.
SC: You don't really KNOW, do you?
Me: Ma'am I've been here in a power outage before. We don't have back up generators or anything of that nature. We close the store.
SC: Well then why would someone tell me that you had back up?
Me: Do you know the name of the gentleman that told you that?
SC: No...but...

The voices in her head always told her different

[MoonCat]

SC: Do you have a back up generator for your store?
Me: No. We have 15 minutes of back up power for registers only and then we close.
SC: Well SOMEONE told me that you have a generator.
Me: We don't.
SC: You don't really KNOW, do you?
Me: Ma'am I've been here in a power outage before. We don't have back up generators or
anything of that nature. We close the store.
SC: Well then why would someone tell me that you had back up?

Lemme ask this customer a question: Why would you believe the word of a random stranger over the word of someone who actually works at the place you're calling?

[EricKei]

Lemme ask this customer a question: Why would you believe the word of a random stranger over the word of someone who actually works at the place you're calling?

Actually, it sounds like this SC would do just that >_> After all, people from outside of the store are actually humans...

[Moirae]

Try working in a hotel and having people complain that there's no power anywhere in the city but downtown. At my last job, one of the front desk clerks told me that someone did that during Hurricane Isaac. Yeah, its because the downtown has redundant systems on redundant systems because its a tourist trap but even they aren't perfect. The rest of the city doesn't have that.

[EricKei]

Try working in a hotel and having people complain that there's no power anywhere in the city but downtown.

Wait, wait....Wait. They complained about power being out when the hotel where they were actually staying, which was likely providing for most or all of their immediate needs, still had power?

Or did I misread it?

[Primer]

Re: The Case of the Disappearing Pens:

Get the stick pens with separate caps, not the click style. Remove the caps, and either stash the caps in the back office, or under the counter, or just trash them entirely. Stick pens without caps don't walk off nearly as often, or as quickly, as others!

[Moirae]

Wait, wait....Wait. They complained about power being out when the hotel where they were actually staying, which was likely providing for most or all of their immediate needs, still had power?

Or did I misread it?

Yep. Because they couldn't do touristy stuff because there was no power, hence no lights and air conditioning. Makes you wonder about peoples brains, doesn't it.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I'm pretty sure this guy knew he was stupid after I got done with him.

SC: I'd like to prepay on pump nine.
Me: Pump nine is actually broken right now.
SC: ....is there a SIGN?

Had that at the petrol station where I work. The air pump is always being out of order due to mysterious people who cut off the end of the air hose and take it away with them. We do put a sign there, but one time it was pouring with rain so the sign did eventually disintigrate, but there were also cones there to stop people using it. Still the SCs came in to whine that the air pump was broken and "Where's the sign?" when it was obvious by the fact that the end of the air hose was missing that it was unuseable.