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  • ba-dum-bum...

    Rocket science made simple…
    1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir
    Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
    2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned
    out to be an optical Aleutian.
    3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
    4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from an algebra class because
    it was a weapon of math disruption.
    5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind
    in his orders .
    6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
    7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
    8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
    9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
    10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
    11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
    12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
    13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, "You stay here; I'll go on a head."
    14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
    15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: "Keep Off the Grass."
    16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, "No change yet."
    17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion .
    18. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
    19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
    20. Don't join dangerous cults. Practice safe sects.
    __________________
    Shut up and jump.

  • #2
    Quoth Professional Serf View Post
    Rocket science made simple…
    1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir
    Cumference.
    And the weirdest knight was Sir Realism.
    I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
    My LiveJournal
    A page we can all agree with!

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    • #3
      11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
      Meanwhile, all the toilets at the police station were stolen. The investigation is expected to take a while, because the police have nothing to go on.
      Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

      Comment


      • #4
        Some of the police are busy investigating a complaint by a peanut. It was assaulted.
        People who don't like cats were probably mice in an earlier life.
        My DeviantArt.

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        • #5
          Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.


          This was my faveorite one
          "Getting to the top is optional. Getting down is mandatory." _Ed Viesturs
          "Love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking, and don't settle" Steve Jobs

          Comment


          • #6
            Talking about knights, my favorite one was Sir Veysa. He was always so much fun.

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth wolfie View Post
              Meanwhile, all the toilets at the police station were stolen. The investigation is expected to take a while, because the police have nothing to go on.
              But they have been flushing the Neighborhood for clues.
              Just sliding down the razor blade of life.

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth drunkenwildmage View Post
                But they have been flushing the Neighborhood for clues.
                And so far they're coming up empty.
                Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

                Comment

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