Wish me luck: gastroscopy

[Seshat]

I'm nervous as hell. Gastroscopy tomorrow. I don't want it. I really, really, really don't want it. I know it's a routine procedure, and I know it's part of finding out what's wrong with me. I know that if they find something they can fix, it'll improve my quality of life (not having the back of my throat raw all the time should be great).

But I. don't. want. this.

I just want to run away and panic and hide and curl up in a corner and vanish and .. and ... and I'm so SICK TO DEATH of medical stuff and I don't want to leave my house where it's safe and I'm comfortable and I have all my medications and things. And I don't want to go nil by mouth from 7am so even if I'm in pain and afraid I can't take my 'as needed' breakthrough pain and panic-attack stopping medications.

And I don't want to be in a hospital in the care of people I don't know who don't know me and my complex medical issues. I wish this was something that could be done at my local doctor's office where they KNOW me and the nurses and the receptionists have watched me slowly get better and cheer for me when I can come in without using my stick and can often tell if I'm having a good day or a bad day just from how I hold my face and body.

And the nurses at my doctor's office know that I'm fibro, and pain-sensitive, and make a point of being gentle when they have to do things that can hurt me. These nurses don't know me, and for all I know they're among the people who think fibromyalgia is a psychosomatic thing, or even malingering. Or they might be among the people who know it's real. I don't know.

But I'm scared.

And .. well. Wish me luck.

[kansasgal]

I do wish you luck, and I hope that the doctors and nurses are gentle and understanding about your Fibro.

Daughter in law has it, and I can see it is no fun.

[Shpepper]

Take the above post, print it out and post it in numerous places where it can be seen by all who will be caring for you. Hand it to the nurse when you check in and make sure they read it. Have whomever is going to be with you make sure others read it and know about the issues. Take your pain and anxiety meds with you to the hospital. Once you do that, breathe and remember that you are allowed to be scared carpless all you want. It's a scary thing having medical stuff done. We will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.

[ArcticChicken]

A technique that helps me when there's something I really REALLY don't want to do, but I need to, is I get someone I love to hold me and let me whine about it, or if it's scary, let me cry about it. I just let my inner five year old pitch a fit, and when she's done I find it a lot easier to do scary-yet-necessary things.

Anyway, good luck, and lots of hugs.

[PawnPrincess Ardra]

I second Spepper's idea of taking what you wrote in. I also wish you luck and hope that things go more smoothly than imaginable.

[Rapscallion]

Ice cream for after. Trust me on this - it helps with the throat after.

Been there, got no T-shirt.

Rapscallion

[Seshat]

A technique that helps me when there's something I really REALLY don't want to do, but I need to, is I get someone I love to hold me and let me whine about it, or if it's scary, let me cry about it. I just let my inner five year old pitch a fit, and when she's done I find it a lot easier to do scary-yet-necessary things.

Thank you - all of you.

Shpepper: I'll find out who's going to be the nurse-in-charge of me, and let them know I have anxiety issues.

Arctic Chicken: I've just taken my morning meds, I'm about to go to sleep for most of the nil-by-mouth period of time. And I packed my cuddle tiger, and my husband is quite, quite used to the fact that if A or I are stressed, he gets to be the adult and we just follow along for medical stuff.

He'll wake me in just enough time for me to dress (I'm already packed and my clothes are on top of my overnight bag), and get going. Minimum wait time, minimum stress.


Oddly enough, I was quite the adult-me for my mammogram. Maybe because it doesn't involve sedation, and doesn't have the possible side effect of 'a hole in the throat'.

G'night, folks. I'll not be on now until after the procedure. Thanks for the support.

[Mishi]

I hope it wll goes well, sending good vibes and I'm praying for you, your family and the medical staff. *Gentle cuddles* You can do this.

[MoonCat]

HUGS to you.

Let us know how it goes.

[SongsOfDragons]

*Big squeezy hugs*

Good luck dumpling!! I second Raps' advice of ice cream.

[fireheart]

How did it go?!

[Mytical]

Late good luck wishes, but since you are probably tougher then the green bay packers combined..probably went off without a hitch.

[Seshat]

Awww, thanks Mytical. :P


And yes, I'm home - fell asleep again pretty much as soon as I got home, slept until my myotherapy appt today. I think I'm awake - if this post is incoherent, I'm not.

It went fine.

They put me in a pre-op ward which was a bunch of recliner chairs with the standard hospital curtains around each chair. A lovely nurse weighed me, asked me a bunch of questions, put lovely hospital bracelets around my wrist and ankle. And I waited for my turn.

She gave me some hospital 'clothes' to wear (You know, the standard white stuff that ties in the back), but told me not to get changed until she said - no point in being half-nekkid too soon. I was to leave my glasses and shoes on, though. Everything else I had with me was to stay by my chair (there's a 'bedside table' sized chest of drawers there).

They did a pre-op blood pressure and pulse test, as well.

Eventually it was my turn, and I was led to a small room, where first the anesthetist, then the doctor (surgeon?) who was to do the gastroscopy asked me questions. Pretty much the same set again....

Into the surgery room, shoes and glasses onto a shelf under the trolley, me on the trolley. Anesthetist and assistant wriggling a needle around in my right hand. Other people doing assorted other things in the background....


..... I woke up in a post-surgery recovery ward, with a nurse checking me to make sure I was waking up okay.

Once she was comfortable with my recovery, I was brought back to the ward with the chairs, and helped into the chair. She put it in recliner mode, and took my blood pressure and pulse again.

Finally I could eat. They offered me tea or coffee, but I wanted water. They were out of sandwiches (you'd think with knowing how many patients they were processing, they could order a set number of sandwiches!), but they offered me biscuits (cookies and crackers, for you Americans).

Another blood pressure/pulse check. And they called D, to let him know I was okay to come home. And told me that once I was comfortable and wanted to, I could change.

D got caught in traffic. TWICE. So he was half an hour later than he'd hoped.

Once home, I thought I wanted to eat. Then I said I'd just lie down for a moment.

Several hours later, D and A brought me some Hungry Jacks (Burger King) and woke me up so I could eat it.
Half an hour or so later, I woke up and ate the not-yet-cold burger and fries. In bed.

Next morning - barely - A woke me and asked if I could be awake enough that we could go to the myotherapy appointments early so she could grab something from the chemist while we were there.

And then we did that, and then it's now.

[Seraph]

Glad to hear everything went okay. <hugs>

Although, glad you translated for us Americans. I totally was jealous at the first thought of you getting awesome buttery biscuits. :<

[Mishi]

I'm glad it was easier than you expected. I hope they figured out what's going on and how to fix it.
I know those bikkies all too well, I normally end up with a scotch finger and a dodgy-looking 'anzac' bikkie (homemade is always better!).