Is it just me or is this a bit ... "off" ...

[Pixilated]

Didn't know where to post this, so here it is ... it's not sucky so much as a bit ... creepy, IMO. (Disclaimer: I have no children.)

I'm in the bank today and in front of me there's a mom with a boy in a stroller and two girls. The girls are wearing identical dresses, but one has noticeably darker hair. They are both wearing sandals, very similar but not 100% identical. One is 5 and the other 7. The difference in size isn't enough to be striking, particularly as they are doing different things (e.g. one sitting, one wandering around; or both wandering around, but not together).

Woman behind me strikes up a conversation with mom, asking are they twins, etc. A bit of chitchat reveals that the girls' near-identical clothing is ... on Daddy's orders. Mom says something to the effect of, "He really doesn't like it when they don't match."

Me: (thinks) ... WTF ...

[Aethian]

Yea...that seems off.

[kibbles]

Why does it seem off?? Would it still seem off if it was a mother who expressed the same opinion? I ask because I have seen lots of parents prefer to dress children (even if they are not twins) in matching clothes.

Maybe a bit obsessive compulsive maybe..but IMO I wouldn't say off.

[Mishi]

Yeah, it seems a bit off. For me, the gender of the parent has nothing to do with it, what bothers me is the control aspect. My two like to have matching clothes, but they don't like to wear them at the same time.

Then again, if I had a huge family like the one my best friend grew up in, it makes sense to dress them similarly (in bright colours) for outings/field-trips because it's easier to pick your kids out of the crowd and to be able to count them accurately.

[MoonCat]

If she had said, "their dad really loves seeing them in matching outfits," it wouldn't sound weird.

Saying "he really doesn't like it when they don't match" DOES.

Not because he's the dad. Because it BOTHERS HIM when their outfits don't match.

[Pixilated]

Mishi and MoonCat pinned it down, I think -- it seems, from mom's description, to be a real control issue with dad. A parent (regardless of gender) likes seeing their kids in matching outfits? Cool. But mom's phraseology made it fairly clear that dad will not allow the girls to dress in anything other than matching outfits.

And kibbles, I've given your questions some thought. I don't see that it would make any difference if it had been the mom who said she would not allow the two girls to dress differently.

[morgana]

"He really doesn't like it when they don't match."

Well, my creepy-meter went ding.

[kaherbert]

You went through a worm hole and meant my aunt and cousins years ago. The girls wore the same outfits (Usually US style jumpers over same colored blouse), the boy wore shorts/pants made of the same material as the jumpers. If one of them got a spot on their clothes, they would troop over to the washer and dryier, strip to their undies, put the clothes in to wash, go upstairs and change into a new matching outfit. The girls hair was always pulled back so tight it looked like they had bad botox. I have to defend my uncle this was completely on my aunt. The woman washes floor with straight clorox how she hasn't gassed the whole family to death I don't know.

[telecom_goddess]

You went through a worm hole and meant my aunt and cousins years ago. The girls wore the same outfits (Usually US style jumpers over same colored blouse), the boy wore shorts/pants made of the same material as the jumpers. If one of them got a spot on their clothes, they would troop over to the washer and dryier, strip to their undies, put the clothes in to wash, go upstairs and change into a new matching outfit. The girls hair was always pulled back so tight it looked like they had bad botox. I have to defend my uncle this was completely on my aunt. The woman washes floor with straight clorox how she hasn't gassed the whole family to death I don't know.

This is starting to sound like my mom, although I had no one else to share my pain with it was just me. But the hair being pulled tight is something I had to deal with too.

But yeah the way it's phrased sounds creepy and controlling to me.

[CloserToSane]

A little off, but I grew up with cousins like that. I used to get roped in to the matching monstrosity on occasion. However some people used to think that the younger sister was related to me instead. I enjoyed that because it annoyed their mother.

They had the tightly pulled back hair too, mine was looser and always in a braid (I could sit on it, it was more practical).

[kibbles]

Thanks for the responses JMO but I see it as not necessarily creepy, but maybe a bit on the odd side.

[Mishi]

Count me in as one of the ones that grew up with super-tight hairdos! According to my mother, artistically messy = not done properly. She'd freak out if she saw Jazzy and Bubbles's hair, because Jazzy has adorable self-trimmed bangs and Bubbles doesn't want her hair up most of the time.

[AmbrosiaWriter]

I'd be a bit worried about what might happen when those girls get a bit older, a bit more independent, and a bit vicious during that time of the month, and they no longer want to dress the same because they're getting teased at school because of it.

[Pixilated]

Thanks for the responses JMO but I see it as not necessarily creepy, but maybe a bit on the odd side.

I'm also keeping in mind that we are only hearing one side of the story ... for all we know dad just thinks it's cute for the girls to be identically dressed, and for some reason mom is giving it a twist that suggests it's a command.

I'd be a bit worried about what might happen when those girls get a bit older, a bit more independent, and a bit vicious during that time of the month, and they no longer want to dress the same because they're getting teased at school because of it.

Yeah, if it is indeed a major control issue, there are going to be some huge battles in that house when the girls hit adolescence ...

[Andara Bledin]

My grandmother dressed her two youngest in matching outfits.

In her defense, my mother and youngest aunt are actually twins, and while the outfits matched, they were in different colors.

^-.-^