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Old 10-14-2008, 09:37 AM
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iradney iradney is offline
Senior Stuff Do'er
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: South Africa
Posts: 3,381

Dear Work

Please, for the love of deity, do not send me away from home for 3 straight weeks again! I miss my boyfriend, my dog, my bed, and I'm so horny I can barely think straight!

The report button - not just for decoration
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Old 10-14-2008, 07:47 PM
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crazylegs crazylegs is offline
Super Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: The far end of the bell curve
Posts: 3,971

Dear Of Montreal,

I appreciate the spiffy looking (and feeling) cardboard widget that encloses your latest musical creation, but next time would you be so knd as to not use as a spindle for the disk a piece of rubber that would be more suited to gripping delicate porcalain on an extremely slippery, oil covered surface. It is *insanely* difficult to remove the disk from the sleeve without damaging said sleeve.


A PSA, if I may, as well as another.
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Old 10-14-2008, 11:51 PM
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the_std the_std is offline
Manager of Electronic Things
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Bumfudge, Canada
Posts: 242

Dear City of Chicago,

I am coming back ASAP.

So much love,
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Old 10-15-2008, 06:28 PM
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Shangri-laschild Shangri-laschild is offline
Girl Friday Extraordinaire
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Illinois
Posts: 769

Dear Mom,

Your computer program blocks CS but not my very NSFW comics. Well...I guess that makes sense? Oh well.
"Man, having a conversation with you is like walking through a salvador dali painting." - Mac Hall
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Old 10-15-2008, 06:39 PM
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Elspeth Elspeth is offline
I throw rocks at the sun
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The land of much rain
Posts: 377

Dear Blizzard and WoW:

Give me back my pets!!!! Also could you make the server work tonight so I can level my druid. and I won't have to listen to the hubby go insane (laughing so hard my stomach hurt last night)

Your little addicted one

Dear Irkariam admins

BITE ME YOU ()*&%#$ RAT #$)(*%#$(

Yours in hate

To Dell:

Please have that laptop I have my eye on in the outlet tomorrow when I get paid in stock!! It would cheer me up to have a little retail therapy.

The person drooling on the laptop with a bluray drive in it

Dear work

For the love of crap let me and the hubby have the 13 and 14 of November off.

Your slave

And to life in general:

Would you please stop sucking. I would like to come out of this depression and be happy again. I don't like to be this way.

Coffee should be strong, black and chewy! It should strip paint and frighten small children.

My blog Darkwynd's Musings
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Old 10-16-2008, 02:27 PM
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Becks Becks is offline
Member of the T Plush fan club
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: adding to the male harem
Posts: 9,798

Dear man of the household™,

You can live without your car for a few days. We're trying to help Mommy and Bella move.

Not one of Patty Moo's cars can't make the trip down there and back. Bear, Paul and Julie need theirs, and Paul and Bear are taking their own vehicles down this weekend to help. Julie needs hers because she has, you know, the children.

Suck it up. You have plenty of soda, milk, food and smokey treats. And God knows that if for some reason you go through all of that while I'm gone you'll end up going through mine, too. You always do.

Not fond of you at the moment,

Unseen but seeing
oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
3rd shift needs love, too
RIP, mo bhrionglóid
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Old 10-16-2008, 03:02 PM
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RetailWorkhorse RetailWorkhorse is offline
Purveyor of Bacon
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: In an RV.
Posts: 2,518

Dear United States Postal Service,

There are times that I really appreciate you, times I absolutely hate you, and times I ignore you because I don't get mail anyhow.

Right now is Time Number 2, the I HATE LOATHE AND DESPISE YOU!!!!!!! time. Would you like to know why? It's because Sister had dropped an envelope into the mail system that had a micro SD card filled with 30 or so games on it for my Nintendo DSLite and I have yet to receive it. I managed to get my EZ Flash from CHINA faster than this.

So please, come in today so's I can go back to playing Wild World because I've become quickly addicted and I have no computer on which to level up my Guild Wars Character (and I bet she's feeling pretty neglected right now, poor little Serra).

With an aggitated snarl,
Das Mel.
Now a member of that alien race called Management.

Yeah, you see that right. Pink. Harness.
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Old 10-16-2008, 05:07 PM
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Misanthropical Misanthropical is offline
Dodge this!
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Under your bed
Posts: 1,088

Dear doctors office,

I have been seeing a pain specialist for almost a year now, so what is with only giving out a one time referral? Did you really think that the pain I have had for over 20 years would suddenly stop and never come back? Please try to think before doing such goofy stuff. I don't like having to call and nag.

Oh, and the one pain specialist? Yeah, you should ignore his hallucinations. His notes are as far from reality as on can get and still be on planet Earth.

Dear BossMan's boss,

Could you please stop monopolizing his time? The people that work under him sometimes need his help and we don't want to interrupt what ever the hell you are talking to him about for hours at a time.

Dear family,

If you all don't start picking up after yourselves I will lose it on all of you and it won't be pretty! If I'm not happy, you won't be either! got it? good!
Do not annoy the woman with the flamethrower!

If you don't like it, I believe you can go to hell! ~Trinity from The Matrix

Yes, MadMike does live under my couch.
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Old 10-18-2008, 03:25 PM
RetailWorkhorse's Avatar
RetailWorkhorse RetailWorkhorse is offline
Purveyor of Bacon
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: In an RV.
Posts: 2,518

Dear Fuzzy Slobbering Dog in the Sky,

The negativity my parents have been spewing forth, I fear, has slgihtly damaged my psyche. I feel that, since they feel like failures and pieces of shit, that I by association am one as well. The Truck hasn't sold yet, the hotdog cart is yet unfinished, and there is talk of staying here through another Winter.

The Move Date has been pushed back to Mid Spring, claiming time enough for Elder Litter Mate to locate and close on a house before the rest of the Pack descend on her (and, really, that will probably look very scary).

I try so hard not to have doubts, but I have great concern that if I make it through this Winter, I will not survive the next.

The Utter Hatred for the place in which I was born has caused me many a heartache and I only wish for the pain to be gone.

I will try, heart and soul, to survive the upcoming Snow Season, but there is much fear in me that I will not survive another year.

These may be the words of a madman, but I have no doubt that should I see Winter '09-'10, the shotgun hanging from the wall will find its way into my hands.

I was not, you see, built to withstand the force of very many Winters.

I keep wishing the quick death of my grandmother, and even quicker distribution of the inheritence and I know that that is not the feeling of someone of Righteous Worth. I recognize the greed fueling such thoughts that money, and a hefty amount of it to be sure, would make all the pain of this year go away. With this Recognition I know that I will never go to be with the Righteous Worth.

It has been such a hard year, for so many people, that I honestly have no idea how they do it.

I suppose they go the AA Route and just take it One Day At A Time. The mentality that I survived Today and will survive the coming morn.

It certainly explains why so many turn to religion. I turned to you, after all, if not for help than only to listen. I do not expect even that, really, though it would be appreciated. I know I'm not the best person in the world, in fact most of the time I'm a selfish person and a sucky cad to boot, but I do try to do right by you.

I know that asking you to give me strength and the energy to complete the tasks ahead of me is quite a bit for one such as myself, so I will not bother to plead. I will continue to let you know of my progress, though. Kind of like the person on your internet journal friend list that you don't talk to all the time, but appreciate general news on their going-ons and such. I haven't kept a daily log of things for years, really, so please excuse the amount of time between writings.

Please know that, even though you are no longer with me on a daily basis, that sometimes I will ignore you or abuse your name, that it's Human Nature, as much as I abhor being human would much rather be a Fuzzy One, that you will always be a vital part of me.

Kind of like the continuous loop of "Together Forever" by the Kingsmen that's always running through the back of my head, or the ticking of mt Mother's clock that's no longer on the wall. Those two are integrated into the fibre of my very being and, like you, will never really disappear.

So please forgive the absences, the mood swings, and abuse, and sometimes dislike that may be directed at you. I have difficulty expressing this jumble of emotions, even idenitying some of them, that it will not come out right every time.

For the heartache I will cause you, I apologize.
For the Sucess in the Future, I await with anticipation.
For today I have Survived and with the hope that I will Survive until the next Morn.
Have a great day. <3
~Melonius of Bladian Clan, Lesser Shinsuke Branch.
Now a member of that alien race called Management.

Yeah, you see that right. Pink. Harness.
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Old 10-21-2008, 03:29 AM
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AdminAssistant AdminAssistant is offline
Teaching Assistant
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 522

Dear ex-roomie,

I am SO sorry. I want to tell you how wonderful you are, how the bitch that broke your heart doesn't deserve you, how much better than that you are, how you deserve someone better. But I know that's not what you want to hear. If you ever need me, I'm not far away. Please, please, don't fall into your self-destructive cycle.


The Monica to your Rachel
"Even arms dealers need groceries." ~ Ziva David, NCIS

Tony: "Everyone's counting on you, just do what you do best."
Abby: "Dance?" ~ NCIS
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