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  #21  
Old 04-01-2008, 09:47 PM
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draggar draggar is offline
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Dear Garbage men,

QUIT BREAKING MY GARBAGE BARRELS!!!!!
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  #22  
Old 04-01-2008, 09:50 PM
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Jester Jester is offline
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Dear tourists:

The gas pedal is the one on the RIGHT. I know the speed limits are slow down here, but they AREN'T 10 mph! Oh, you want to check out the sights? Fine. PARK THE FUCKING CAR AND WALK, OR CHECK OUT WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE. Some of us need to get where we're going before we're eligible for retirement!

Yeah. Thanks.

Late Jester.


Dear Jester,

You know, you would stress out a lot less for these cookoffs you participate in if you would just stop procrastinating and get stuff done earlier in the day. ESPECIALLY when you are making something you have never made before. Asshole.

Annoyed Jester.
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  #23  
Old 04-01-2008, 10:10 PM
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MystyGlyttyr MystyGlyttyr is offline
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Dear friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend...

Someday, we need to pick a position and stick with it.

-Mysty
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  #24  
Old 04-01-2008, 11:26 PM
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tropicsgoddess tropicsgoddess is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 3,533
Angry My Open Letters

Dear Head Hunters,

You all are of great annoyance and frustration to me. I hate that you don't call when you say you will to tell me if I get to come in for another interview or if I got the job. How unprofessional and discourteous of you. What pisses me off is how you want to pigeon-hole people like me into the same type of work despite my qualifications. Worse is how extremely high of standards you all have for a grunt job with crappy pay. Get over yourselves. Not even a recent college grad would go for that, unless they were really really desperate. The worst part of all is how you like to post up these ads for seemingly great jobs that are nothing but either commission only sales bullshit or overly-glorified crappy jobs. I am not job hunting for fun, stop wasting my time, you asshats.



Tropicsgoddess



----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Dear S,

I hope that you finally got it in your pecan-sized brain that I don't want you speaking to me anymore in any way shape or form. I have been telling you so many fucking times that it's disrespectful that you keep attempting to do so when I am engaged and living with my fiancé. It's been 5 years since I dumped you and all the whining you've been doing about how I "hurt you emotionally" etc. needs to stop. Move on already! You're full of shit every time you've told me (more than once) that you're getting married , when A who is supposedly your homeboy spills the beans on how you keep getting dumped because you're a pathetic pansy. For somebody who is 3 1/2 years my senior you sure are petty and immature and I do not regret dumping your sorry ass at all. Please for the love of all things holy leave me the fuck alone and man up you fucking wuss.


Tropicsgoddess
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  #25  
Old 04-01-2008, 11:58 PM
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Rubyred Rubyred is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: The 561 yo.
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Quote:
Quoth Jester View Post
Dear tourists:

The gas pedal is the one on the RIGHT. I know the speed limits are slow down here, but they AREN'T 10 mph! Oh, you want to check out the sights? Fine. PARK THE FUCKING CAR AND WALK, OR CHECK OUT WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE. Some of us need to get where we're going before we're eligible for retirement!

Yeah. Thanks.

Late Jester.

I think I love you. I yell this at someone every single day.

PS. I must write my letter later as I am currently in the same room with the person to be written about.

Last edited by Rubyred; 04-02-2008 at 12:03 AM.
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  #26  
Old 04-02-2008, 12:12 AM
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Saydrah Saydrah is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Colorado
Posts: 629
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Dear SO's High School Teacher,

You are a vindictive cunt, and I don't use that word lightly. Do you realize that now, years after you "lost" his high school transcripts to prevent him from graduating after he upset your pet student, it is still screwing him over? I don't care WHAT he did to the teacher's pet- it was high school drama, not a criminal offense, and I wish I'd known about it at the time so I could have taken you in front of the school board over it before he buckled under your pressure and insults and consented to withdraw from school. You told a student he'd never amount to anything and he was worthless- what kind of a teacher are you?

I hope that someday you really need a document from someone in order to keep your job, and they shred it right in front of you and tell you they lost it.

Oh, and I know about your paranoid personality disorder. It's no excuse, bitch. Get a job where you don't deal with young people or anyone you can fuck over.

With Hate,
Resume Tweaking Girlfriend
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  #27  
Old 04-02-2008, 01:13 AM
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ArenaBoy ArenaBoy is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,709
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Dear Arsenal

Please please beat Liverpool in the Champions League. I say this because anytime that Chelsea plays Liverpool the matches become so boring that they are one day going to be used as sleep aids. They're that bad.

Dear Michigan:

Stop snowing, please? It's April ffs and I'm getting sick of cleaning off my car.
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  #28  
Old 04-02-2008, 01:55 AM
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RecoveringKinkoid RecoveringKinkoid is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 4,820
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Quote:
Quoth MystyGlyttyr View Post
Dear friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend friend not friend...

Someday, we need to pick a position and stick with it.

-Mysty
Man, I wish I'd seen this before choosing the "not friend" option on a...well...a "not friend".

I mean, I still would have chosen "not friend", but it would have made a witty retort before I made the commitment.



Dear Guys with Buckets Collecting Money for an Alleged Charity At the Red Light,

Get your dumb ass the FUCK out of the road! I have enough to worry about without having to worry about some dicksmack that lacks the intellence to not play in traffic!

You knock on my window, you're gonna end up fitted with a hook. Get out of the road!

RK

Last edited by RecoveringKinkoid; 04-02-2008 at 02:37 AM.
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  #29  
Old 04-02-2008, 02:20 AM
Parrothead Parrothead is offline
yay!
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Over there =>
Posts: 425
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Dear Grandma W,

I am not five years old. I haven't been for almost 17 years now. I can legally drink. I can walk on the beach at dusk and not drown, k?

Your greatly annoyed granddaughter
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  #30  
Old 04-02-2008, 03:00 AM
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XCashier XCashier is offline
Insert clever title here
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: At my computer
Posts: 6,945
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Quote:
Quoth iradney View Post
Dear fatcells

Please stop expanding and multiplying. You're beginning to piss me off.

Love

rads
Quote:
Quoth tropicsgoddess View Post
Dear Head Hunters,

You all are of great annoyance and frustration to me. I hate that you don't call when you say you will to tell me if I get to come in for another interview or if I got the job. How unprofessional and discourteous of you. What pisses me off is how you want to pigeon-hole people like me into the same type of work despite my qualifications. Worse is how extremely high of standards you all have for a grunt job with crappy pay. Get over yourselves. Not even a recent college grad would go for that, unless they were really really desperate. The worst part of all is how you like to post up these ads for seemingly great jobs that are nothing but either commission only sales bullshit or overly-glorified crappy jobs. I am not job hunting for fun, stop wasting my time, you asshats.

Tropicsgoddess
Gotta give a "DITTO!" and a to both of these letters!

Okay, here's mine:

Dear temp job,

You've got concrete floors. You expect your employees to stand for eight-hour shifts, five days a week. It would be very kind of you to invest in some anti-fatigue floor mats, as well as work tables set at a proper height so that we don't have to bend over to work on them. Otherwise, you will lose more and more temps due to horrible back pain, just as you did me.

Oh, and if you want us to wear your work uniform, you might try investing in some sizes that real people wear. Very few people can wear 28 W X 38 L pants, at least not safely. And who had the brain seizure to come up with putting the final step of the assembly all the way back at the start of the assembly line?! Ergonomics, planning, safety. All good words.

Please get your act together,
XCashier
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