Sucky hotel guests . . . includes question

[Monterey Jack]

I've known people who applaud and cheer at the end of the performance when their hotel neighbors get frisky, especially if the walls are thin.

Reminds me of that scene from the movie The Secret Of My Success, where Michael J. Fox starts air conducting in time to his neighbors' frantic, wall-banging sexcapades, and cracks opens a can of beer at the climax, which fizzes all over the place.

[Mr Hero]

I've had parents ask me to call the guests involved to keep the noise down. Their kids usually think the woman's loud screams are because of pain.

[MrSmiley]

A long time ago, there was a guest who would sometimes go off and have the sex with his girlfriend. They were loud. It wasn't an issue as far as I knew, but it was loud and could be heard down the hallway. I never actually ever got a complaint about it however. But this guy also thought it would be a good idea to cover up his sex with the sounds of music; he brought a boom box that he would crank up in the room to cover the noise. I did get noise complaints about the boom box. Specifically the THUMP THUMP THUMP bass that went along the walls and annoyed various people.

So the boom box would cause noise complaints. And we'd call the guest to ask him to keep it down. Well, because he was in the middle of sex, he didn't want to be interrupted and often told the person calling to fuck off or just would stop answering his phone.

Anyway this happened for awhile, he became a regular guest. He would often apologize to the managers in the daytime and agree not to play his boom box. And it wasn't like he was doing this every night. Still, within a week long stay, the fellow probably caused the noise complaints to happen at least once. What got him banned was the night he was doing this and the person who called down with the noise complaint was the owner who happened to be staying over for a flight in the morning (he is not usually present except for a dotted line to his company somewhere...). Not only did he phone down with a complaint, but he also got to hear the guest swearing at the security guard and night auditor who went up to talk to the guest and try to get him to shut up.

[Sapphire Silk]

If the walls are thin enough for you to clearly hear the frisky couple, how about waiting for them to finish and then yelling (loudly enough for them to hear it) "Cut! That's a print!" Let them wonder where the cameras are, and who's going to see the footage.

Or give them directions... 'Bang her head harder on the headboard,a little more thrusting...that's perfect....' Commentary on the technique will always go down well methinks

Oooh! I love these! I'll have to remember them next time I stay in a hotel!

[wolfie]

So the boom box would cause noise complaints. And we'd call the guest to ask him to keep it down. Well, because he was in the middle of sex, he didn't want to be interrupted and often told the person calling to fuck off or just would stop answering his phone.

Anyway this happened for awhile, he became a regular guest.

WTF? How did he manage to become a regular guest? The FIRST time he (for all intents and purposes) told the desk person asking him to keep the noise down that he'd make all the noise he wanted, he should have been evicted and put on DNR status.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

I've had parents ask me to call the guests involved to keep the noise down. Their kids usually think the woman's loud screams are because of pain.

Honey, if she ain't screaming, HE aint' doing something right.

And that would be the response I'd get from my own mother if I had ever commented on such noises.

[Seshat]

A clean pair of socks makes something useful to bite down on. And one can always move the bed a bit away from the wall, so it's not banging on the wall.

Not that I'd know about this sort of thing....


But yes, I think if I were a hotelier, I'd make a small handy note that could be given to .. ah .. noisy rooms.