Yes Ma'am, today's temperature IS my fault

[justZu]

After a blissful 11 days with the baseball team out of town, they came back and I had to work last night. I was happy to be returning to work, but kind of stressed because of the heat. Oh, well, I made the best of it and set up my stand.
Game time comes, and part of the announcer's spiel is to tell the current temperature.

Me=me(yay, me!)
CL = cranky lady

Announcer runs on about attendance, weather...and the temperature at game time is 96 degrees.

Me - Good grief, I can't believe it's 96 degrees right now. (7 pm in the evening)
(Cranky lady looks at me with nasty expression)
CL - THANKS! I don't appreciate hearing the exact temperature! Now I feel EVEN HOTTER! (geabs beer and stalks away)
Me - (WTF?)next!

I wasn't even talking to the customer, I was talking to my daughter-in-law, who I am training to run her own stand.


Bonus SC

During a brief rush last night, I accidentally spilled a beer all over my counter. The customer was a nimble young guy and easily jumped out of the way. He got(literally) about a half-teaspoon of beer on his t-shirt.

Me - yeah, you know who
SC - entitlement-minded freebie whore

Me - Oops, sorry, I'll get you a new one.
SC - You spilled my beer - that means I get a free one.
Me - um, no, that means I pour another one to replace the one I spilled
SC - But I got it on me LOOOOOK! I GET A FREE BEER!
Me - (glances and tiny wet speck and hand him his one paid-for beer)
SC - You mean you aren't giving me another one free? LOOOOK!

I had a line and his whining was getting old. so I go into Mom-Mode and give him the Mom-Face

Me - You got what you paid for, now go(wagging the Mom-disapproving-finger in his direction)

So he grumbled and walked away. I mean, really, what was that? Yes, I spilled it, but I also replaced it. Grow up, already.

[PizzaBoy]

Wow I didn't know that you stating the temperature made it hotter. Damn, you must be really good.

[justZu]

Yes, for I am She Who Commands The Thermometer
All behold my mighty powers!

[Sliceanddice]

I feel cooler when i hear the temp... shes weird...

[Foxglove8778]

Quoth justZu

CL - THANKS! I don't appreciate hearing the exact temperature! Now I feel EVEN HOTTER!

but it isn't the heat, it's the humidity....
*duck & run*

[blas]

Oh how I hate not having A/C in my car.

My friends bitch at me for not wanting to go anywhere....

Um, gee....I'm going to melt on the way.....or get my head cut off in traffic for sticking it out the window all the way like a woman in menopause!

[Anakah]

She'd die out here it get to be 120 sometimes... You can almost fry an egg on the sidewalk :P

[Kara]

Quoth justZu

SC - But I got it on me LOOOOOK! I GET A FREE BEER!
Me - (glances and tiny wet speck and hand him his one paid-for beer)
SC - You mean you aren't giving me another one free? LOOOOK!

Are you allowed to refuse to serve someone if they've had too much alcohol? If so, you should have taken the beer away entirely and said "I think you've had enough whine."

*dodges tomatoes*

Quoth Foxglove8778

but it isn't the heat, it's the humidity

In this case, I'd say "It's not the heat, it's the stupidity."

[Becks]

"It's ONLY 96 degrees? Wow. I could've sworn it was 106!! Time to put on my sweatshirt!"

[AnaKhouri]

I work in a bookstore that is two stories, 55,000 square feet and has a massive arched skylight for a ceiling.

It all looks quite impressive but is extremely hard to cool. The skylight acts as a giant magnifying glass and we are the ants. We have something like 10 1-ton air conditioners on the roof, but it really doesn't help much. Every summer it's bloody hot in there. We can tell summer has arrived when the customers start complaining.

Customer: It's hot in here! Isn't it hot in here?
Me >sweat trickles down my face< : Yes. (I work here 9 hours a day, 5 days a week. I've noticed).

I've discovered a way to shut them up, though. It came about entirely by accident.

Customer: It's so hot in here! Why is it so hot? How can you stand it?
Me (thinking she is seriously concerned for the poor employees): Oh, you're very kind to worry, but we get used to it!
Customer: I wasn't concerened about...oh.

Nobody is going to say, "I wasn't worried about you, but myself." Quiets them right down!