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Pop quiz from your driver's ed class!
  #1  
Old 01-29-2008, 06:56 PM
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Sylvia727 Sylvia727 is offline
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Default Pop quiz from your driver's ed class!

You are driving an expensive SUV on a university campus five minutes before classes start. You approach a pedestrian crosswalk, about 20 yards ahead of you. On one side of the crosswalk, a group of three people are about to enter. On the other side, a group of seven people have just entered. Do you:
(A) Obey the posted "Pedestrians Have Right of Way" sign and wait patiently for your fellow students to cross
(B) Slam on the gas, tires squealing, and speed through the crosswalk like a bat out of hell, or
(C) Slam on the gas, tires squealing, speed through the crosswalk and then laugh at the pedestrians diving for cover

If you chose (B), please stop by Sylvia's office to pick up your complimentary obscene gesture. If you chose (C), please schedule an appointment for your mandatory anal penetration, this week only with extra spikes and reduced lubrication. If you chose (A), then you have failed Driver's Ed 201: How to Drive like a Shitbrained Entitlement Legacy.
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  #2  
Old 01-29-2008, 08:52 PM
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What about (D) Slam on the gas, tires squealing, attempt to run over as many pedestrians as possible while laughing maniacilly. Remember 10 points for every hit.

Ok Where do I go for them Dry Spikes again.
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  #3  
Old 01-29-2008, 09:34 PM
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i hate ass holes.... you can wait an extra 30 seconds to get to class...

  #4  
Old 01-29-2008, 10:00 PM
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Sylvia727 Sylvia727 is offline
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Quote:
Quoth Cyphr View Post
i hate ass holes.... you can wait an extra 30 seconds to get to class...
But their mommies and daddies wouldn't have paid for this shiny new car if they couldn't use it to beat everyone else out of their way. </sarcasm>


Quote:
Quoth digilight View Post
What about (D) Slam on the gas, tires squealing, attempt to run over as many pedestrians as possible while laughing maniacilly. Remember 10 points for every hit.

Ok Where do I go for them Dry Spikes again.
Ooo, secret option (D)! You actually get these FREE shiny silver bracelets and an all-expenses-paid six month vacation at our local corrections facility. The mandatory anal penetration will be provided by your cellmate, Ramrod. Enjoy your stay, and please think of us for all your future law-breaking needs.
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Last edited by Sylvia727; 01-29-2008 at 10:04 PM. Reason: multiquote

  #5  
Old 01-29-2008, 10:50 PM
Irving Patrick Freleigh's Avatar
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You missed another option:

(E)--Slam on the gas, tires squealing, attempt to run over as many pedestrians as you can. Then throw your SUV into reverse, back up and run 'em over again! Then shift back into drive, and run 'em down again. And again.

Your reward will be daily (sometimes even twice daily) anal penetrations by cellmates Ramrod, Big Baby and Squirrel. These will be administered dry, so keep your pillow close by at all times and try not to think about that persistent itching, burning sensation. This will continue until your execution, which you will eagerly await and then welcome with open arms.
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  #6  
Old 01-29-2008, 10:52 PM
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Quote:
Quoth Sylvia727 View Post
Ooo, secret option (D)! You actually get these FREE shiny silver bracelets and an all-expenses-paid six month vacation at our local corrections facility. The mandatory anal penetration will be provided by your cellmate, Ramrod. Enjoy your stay, and please think of us for all your future law-breaking needs.

Ahh a visit to our Kara's World (sung to the music of Elmo's world)
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  #7  
Old 01-29-2008, 10:54 PM
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(f) slam gas and laugh until you notice of of the pedstrians is in ROTC and has access to antitank weaponry.

  #8  
Old 01-30-2008, 12:45 AM
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What about option (G) Slow down allowing the people to get into the cross walk, then gun the SUV running over the pedestrians, pull a 180 break survey the scene making sure to mow down any survivors and witnesses, then finally continue on to the nearest handicapped parking spaces and take up 3 of them making sure to block in an old lady's car.

Your reward for such an epic example of asshatted, entitlement whoring, raging idiocy is an all-expenses paid vacation to our lovely new hotel. Marvel at our communal showers full of anal penetrating goodness. Behold our dining hall chock full of virality boosting vitamins. Stare in awe of our other magnificent occupants each with a body of a steroid filled gorilla but twice as tall, wide, and emotional. Prepare to drop trowel for them each and every hour for your entire stay. And all this will be your to enjoy when you chose option (G)
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  #9  
Old 01-30-2008, 12:53 AM
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What about secret option number c? Slam on the brakes and gas at the same time so it sounds like you're gunning it, but really stopping?
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  #10  
Old 01-30-2008, 01:26 AM
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Quote:
Quoth Broomjockey
What about secret option number c? Slam on the brakes and gas at the same time so it sounds like you're gunning it, but really stopping?
Scaring people but actually doing no harm? You mad man. How dare you even consider such an atrocious idea. I fling shame upon you. Much shame, indeed.
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