The reason I hate hospitals and don't trust doctors, part I

[42_42_42]

Are you really supposed to go when you get you first period? 'cuz I was really young, I think 9 when I had my first period.

You're supposed to go when you become sexually active. Generally, if you're in your early 20s and still a virgin, you should go anyway, because there can be problems happening down there even if you're not having sex.

The entire exam was traumatic and scary when I was 15. I was extremely modest and shy about my body and had absolutely no sexual experience. I didn't even have my first kiss until I was 17. I refused to talk to my mother for over a week afterwards. In my mind at the time, she'd helped hold me down while the doctor raped me. Looking back, I totally should have been given some valium or something for the anxiety before the appointment and the doctor should have explained what she was going to do before hand and just been more understanding about me being a freaked out kid. I just had the bad luck to be taken to a OBGYN who was cold and had a horrible bedside manner. Even though my hymen was intact, I don't think she ever believed that I wasn't sexually active. And even though I had all the classic symptoms at the age of 15, she refused to consider poly-cystic ovarian syndrome as the cause of my symptoms. Something which my current OBGYN (who rocks) diagnosed me with immediately when I complained of all the problems I was having.

Now I've had so many different tests and procedures and operations, all that shyness and modesty is totally gone. A pap smear when I was 19 came back abnormal, the retest came back abnormal, and then the biopsy (which hurt like hell because the numbing spray didn't work) came back as precanceous, then I had my cervix frozen (which hurt so bad they could hear me screaming out in the waiting room and I almost broke my mom's hand I squeeze it so hard) and the ONLY pain killer I'd been given was OTC naproxen), follow up pap and biopsy showed that the freezing procedure didn't work, so then I had laser ablation surgery, which thankfully was under general anesthesia and DID work. Then, when I was 30, a football sized tumor developed on my right ovary, completely destroying it. So that surgery left me with a 13 inch scar down my abdomen. A year and a half later a softball sized tumor developed on my left ovary, completely destroying it. So that meant another surgery, this time a 7 inch scar across the top of my pelvis. Fortunately, both tumors were benign, so no radiation or chemo. Between the 2 oopherectomies we were trying to conceive and I had a video X-ray test done where they filled my uterus and remaining fallopian tube with radiactive dye to make sure it wasn't blocked. That test hurt so bad I almost passed out. At this point a pap smear test and even a vaginal ultrasound is nothing.

[Treasure]

wow - i've had ..... 1... I went on the birthcontrol Patch (which got recalled, so i was only on it for 1 month) but honestly i found it a little awkward, cuz normally the only person with their fingers that far in me, has bought me dinner and drinks, first

I stopped seeing that Dr, b/c she wanted to put me back on steroids for my asthma, unfortunately, "controller meds" don't control mine, my triggers will still set me off, even with proper following of the instructions, she refused to believe me, and recommended that i find someone else - which i don't necessarily disagree with, b/c if we can't agree on what to do nothing will work, but as the patient, hey it MY body, i've lived with it for the past 27 almost 28 years, I get a say.

[Little Retail Rabbit]

*big hugs for Zaiida*

What a horrendous woman! You know, regardless of what any medical professional might think (as it blatantly varies from place to place, country-to-country, etc) about what is the "right time" to go, its not her place to treat ANY of her patients like that, let alone a teenager.

17 would be very unusually early in the UK, so personally, I think you were very pro-active in going at that age.

Despite my phobias, I totally understand the need to go as an adult... but if anyone had made me go at 12 or 13 (when I first started menstruating), I would have cried and screamed and tantrumed like a baby. I was immensely embarrassed by my body at that age (partly down to severe bullying), and I was ashamed of having a period...and I was soooo mad at my mother for a time for telling my dad about it (who came and hugged me and beamed that I was "growing up") . Having a strange MAN (yup, had a male doctor then, who was incompetent by the way) do it probably would have tipped me over the edge. But then again, it would be highly irregular for a child to be examined.

And as someone else pointed out, some children begin developing earlier and earlier nowadays =/

(Oh my fiance was proactive and found out what I need to know. Must vary from state to state, but in the state where we're going to live, he found out that I need none of those tests for BC and that the test itself is once every 3 years. He promises me ice cream for everytime I have to do it n_n )

[SuperRTL]

My gyno recommend pap smears every 2 years until menopause, then it should be every year, unless you have a family history of problems with the girl parts. Since no woman in my family has yet to die of old age (though it looks like my Great Aunt Marie might make it) I insist on getting tested every year and I contact my doctor the minute I have a problem. I know my body really well and we've caught some pretty scary things really early.

All that said, it took me years to get comfortable enough to speak up about IV's, blood draws and the like. I learned you could ask for a different nurse/blood draw tech when I popped one in the nose while she was digging around with the 5th needle, trying to get my 2nd vial of blood (ultimately was going to require 12, and this was the second round of these tests. The blood hadn't been stored properly the first time). I didn't mean to hit her, I apologized profusely later, but her supervisor came out and finished my blood draw and gave me a whole list of things to help me next time.

Now, I make appointments with my favorite tech when I have to go in for blood draws, he uses a butterfly needle and has one of my favorite cd's playing when I walk in. I actually see him more some months than my husband.

I'm still a hard stick and phobic of needles but it's getting easier. I make lists when I have to go to the doctor so I don't forget anything and I know what works for me. For example, the only thing Augmentin does for me is give me a UTI. If a doctor prescribes it, I call him back and insist on something different. I'm never rude, but I am insistent.

Hugs for having to go through all that, Maggie. Good on you picking a different surgeon, though.

[LadyAndreca]

*shrug* My first one was on my 29th birthday. My mom yelled at me when I was 26ish because I never went before I got married, but I told her that was HER fault. I've never had regular periods in my LIFE, never ever had two only a month apart, so that was 'normal' for me. But she didn't bring me as a teen, so it never occured to me to go. (She didn't like that.)

[MaggieTheCat]

It took me years to go to a gyn after the first horrible woman I met went off at me because I waited until I was almost 17 to see one.

Holy crap. That's no way at all to treat anyone, let alone a 17 year old going in for her first appointment. :hugs:

Hell, I didn't have my first pelvic exam till I was...I think...23. I was not sexually active, I didn't have a PCP (my mom didn't believe in going to medical professionals of any kind after I was about 5 years old) and when I told my mom that I had made the appointment, she flipped out on me and said I was too young, and that she didn't have her first appointment until her late 20s or early 30s (long after her first sexual experience, since my eldest brother was born when my mom was 21.) Anyway, the lady I saw was very nice and didn't say anything to me about not having it done sooner.

Are you really supposed to go when you get you first period? 'cuz I was really young, I think 9 when I had my first period.

[jedimaster91]

My gyn wrote me enough refills for BC to last the year and then wrote me a new script at my annual appointment. Seems like a pretty good system to me. Unfortunately, they stopped taking my insurance due to some spat and I've yet to find another gyn.

It took me years to go to a gyn after the first horrible woman I met went off at me because I waited until I was almost 17 to see one. I'd had no reproductive problems and my PCP never mentioned it and I'd only been sexually active for 4 months and I didn't make it past the pee in a cup test, I ran out sobbing she screamed so badly at me for being quote 'a lazy stupid girl for', I'm assuming because I didn't start seeing a gyn when I had my first period, she did screech something along those lines.

Heh. She would have loved me. I wasn't sexually active until I was 20 and I have no family history of reproductive problems, so I wasn't too worried about it. My first gyn appointment was right before I got married.

[Zaiida]

Yes, I'm in the US. The urine sample is for a pregnancy test, as you can't be on birth control while pregnant. A pelvic exam and pap smear test are also required. They won't prescribe any kind of BC w/o. They also take a small blood sample to test your iron levels to make sure you're not anemic. I didn't become sexually active until 19, but have had all of those tests done since I was 15 because I needed the pill to regulate my periods.

Weird. In in Australia and only go in for paps ever 3 years. I have the Implanon birth control which needs to be replaced every 3 years. When I was on the pill many years ago all I had to do was request a script, no urine, blood tests, pelvics nothing. Then again I had no bad medical family history that would need those tests except heavy bleeding which is helped by birth control.

The standard amount of time for pap tests here I believe is usually 2-3 years here unless your paps come up abnormal and it's every 6 months until you go back to normal and/or get whatever caused the abnormal test treated.

I'm in rural Oz and we finally got a gyn here 6 months ago and it's already at a year wait unless it's an emergency. Otherwise women would have to travel 3 hours to find an open appointment (city doc) or the only one within 1 hour was booked out for 2 1/2 years at a time. Don't get me started on the 3 year waiting list for public dentists, you cannot get in unless it's a severe emergency like your face exploded or jaw fell off (quoth one poor friend )

It took me years to go to a gyn after the first horrible woman I met went off at me because I waited until I was almost 17 to see one. I'd had no reproductive problems and my PCP never mentioned it and I'd only been sexually active for 4 months and I didn't make it past the pee in a cup test, I ran out sobbing she screamed so badly at me for being quote 'a lazy stupid girl for', I'm assuming because I didn't start seeing a gyn when I had my first period, she did screech something along those lines. Some people have no bedside manners.

I was 22 before I went and had my first pap and I nearly broke the poor nurses' hand I was so scared of being screamed at again and she was so nice. Still do not like the test at all.

[Little Retail Rabbit]

In the UK, unless you have an underlying health problem or are pregnant/have had a baby, you don't start having cervical smears until age 25. And even then, if you are a virgin and inform them when they send the "invitation" (for the most awkward party ever!) they will decline the invitation and just wait until you want to. Many people turn them down even if sexually active etc and this is allowed, although not advised.

My doctor admitted to declining them, which wasn't a great vote of confidence.

But as I stated already, I have extreme anxiety issues due to my mother suffering a severe injury at the hands of her doctor. Won't go into details for many reasons, but finding out scared the living snot out of me, and I already suffer from tokophobia so anything regarding the lady's parts just scares me now.

I'm totally trying to overcome the fear because I realise that in the long run it is something I need to overcome, but my doctor was no help what so ever, and I still strongly feel that a cervical smear once every 6 months is excessive (over here, its one every 5 years). Well, I've been told that its everytime you get your repeat and I repeat every 6 months. Once a year I could understand (I think 5years is a big gap- a lot can happen in 5 years!), but once every 6 months? Too much, especially if you're prone to anxiety attacks.

But yeah, rambling a little now, but I'm trying to get help for theanxiety issue and there's little help to be found. I'm hoping and praying that when I emigrate I somehow get Dr Sympathy who will be willing to work with my issues and help me out, but with our family's luck I doubt that

[Little Retail Rabbit]

Yes, I'm in the US. The urine sample is for a pregnancy test, as you can't be on birth control while pregnant. A pelvic exam and pap smear test are also required. They won't prescribe any kind of BC w/o. They also take a small blood sample to test your iron levels to make sure you're not anemic. I didn't become sexually active until 19, but have had all of those tests done since I was 15 because I needed the pill to regulate my periods.

See in the UK, this would be seen as intrusive and extremely unnecessary, and is one of the things I'm dreading when I emigrate. No doctor in the UK would give a virgin a pap smear- unless there was a suspected underlying health problem. I did try to talk to my doctor about it (I have certain anxiety and phobia issues which is why this is a huge problem for me) and she said she has no real idea why these tests are performed because there is no indication the Pill can lead to the cervical cancer. She could only come to the conclusion that it was to cover their asses as suing is such a big problem over there.

My doctor is also something of a useless drip and when addressing my anxiety only said "Oh maybe they'll have you sign a waiver so you can avoid it" rather than arrange for me to undergo therapy or some other treatment for my anxiety. But the underlining issue is, I don't trust doctors in those areas...my mother was literally torn open by her GP and left to deal with it for 4 years. I also have tokophobia. I actually went to my GP because I have some level trust with her (built up over SEVERAL years- it'll be years before I can have any level of trust with another doctor) to see if she'd help me overcome my anxiety and her only response was "Oh I don't have cervical smears either, I think they're horrible." *facedesk*

[georgie]

its not particularly hard to stick my arm but you only get 3 chances to get blood off me. twice off one arm then once off the other arm. if you cant get it after that then get me someone else.

with my daughter I only allow them to try twice. if they cant get it then we leave. shes tiny and disabled so shouldnt have to put up with more pain.

[ShadowBall]

Why does it seem like everyone who handles IVs can either get the fucker in on the first try with minimal effort, or they're morons who stab you like a voodoo doll trying to find a vein?

Because of a retarded doctor, I was told I had lupus as a teenager (and before House aired) and had to get blood drawn on three separate occasions. First time, the nurse/tech/whatever she was got it on the first try and I didn't even flinch. Second time, I was stabbed about nine or ten times with the same needle because the idiot taking the blood that time could not find a vein.

That left me very very cranky and when I had to go back a third time, I contacted the blood lab and specifically asked that the lady who took my blood the first time do it again. And this lady was so awesome - her and the other techs caught me when I blacked out and fell forward out of the chair; this is why I do not donate blood. I faint after about 1/8 of a pint comes out. And she loaded me to my eyeballs with juice and cookies, she let my boyfriend at the time come into the test area and see me when I woke up and she gave him junk food too.

My most recent wonderful experience was at the dentist. I went in terrified because I was getting two cavities filled and I have such a low pain tolerance. The dentist was so awesome. I told him I was afraid of pain, so he numbed my mouth, told me to close my eyes and shot me full of novocaine. He even let me listen to some music I had with me. Honestly, getting my teeth cleaned hurt worse that these two fillings.

One of my dear friends had quite a medical nightmare as a teen and he wound up needing to be on an IV for something. He said the nurse would stab him with the needle and then wiggle it around in his arm. And then he had to be held down because he was trying to strangle the nurse as she jiggled the needle in yet again. Then again, this is a friend who woke up from a two-month-long coma following a stroke and the loss of his lung. I'd be cranky even before anyone started slinging sharp stabby things at me.

Good times.

[42_42_42]

... if you're from the US...

Yes, I'm in the US. The urine sample is for a pregnancy test, as you can't be on birth control while pregnant. A pelvic exam and pap smear test are also required. They won't prescribe any kind of BC w/o. They also take a small blood sample to test your iron levels to make sure you're not anemic. I didn't become sexually active until 19, but have had all of those tests done since I was 15 because I needed the pill to regulate my periods.

[Little Retail Rabbit]

I take a plushie to the dentist. I used to expect them to laugh at me when I nervously pulled my "little friend" out of my bag, but they were actually very nice about it. The lady dentist just said "whatever helps you get through it!" and the gentleman dentist tried to humour and said "Oh ok, what's his name? Gir eh? Green Gir." XD

[Sapphire Silk]

All good suggestions, Seshat.

Allow me to add one more. If the nurse is having a hard time finding a vein, ask her to apply a warm compress for 15 minutes. It dilates the veins and engorges them with blood, making them easier to find and stick.