Why is your 'boyfriend' so surprised?

[Jester]

Jester you are made of pure awesome, you know that, right?

Why actually yes...yes I do.

[JustADude]

"I'd have avoided the blackmail that keeps me out of the White House."

Jester you are made of pure awesome, you know that, right?

Oh, and also... damn you for making me waste a perfectly good sip of brandy.

[Jester]

"If it weren't for my horse..."

"I'd have avoided the blackmail that keeps me out of the White House."

[Shengirl]

"If it weren't for my horse..."

"I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

[wheresmysanity]

"BF", genuinely surprised to see her, speaks: WTB!...

Holy Christ on the Cross, I just busted a gut laughing right now!!!!

3AW: And you need to learn not to mess with a f*cking convict! I'll f*ck you up.

I LOVE this woman. I wish I were hardened enough to make threats like that and avenge the victims of white-trash bullying! You never mentioned whether WTB had a rebuttal, though I'm guessing she wasn't looking to get shanked...

OK, I have to go wipe the tears from my face now - thanks for a great read!!!

[Imogene]

diapers : townhouse :: mustard : X

Just cleaned that up a bit, and let's see if I can't make some semblance of intelligence to that...
Diapers are needed for the youngin's... which means, hey, you need a bigger place than your trailer, so you move into a townhouse, finally.
Mustard is needed for the hot dogs, which means, hey, you need a casing for it, which leads to buying hot dog buns. Thus, X= hot dog buns.
The complete comparison should read: Diapers:townhouse::mustard:hot dog buns
"If it weren't for my horse..."

[BookstoreEscapee]

Brain Bleach, Brain Bleach, wheres the damn Bleach!

There, there...here you go

[TWOLF]

he probably did know her but they didn't want anyone else to know. I used to work at a grocery store where we would watch from the window in the break room that faced the parking lot people meeting at the store leaving together and then coming back an hour or 2 later. It's like that old saying whenever you see 2 people kissing in public they are not married to each other. They more then likely thought what they were saying would throw people off.

[Bliss]

Speaking so much of bananas, chocolate, paper and condoms made me think back of this: http://www.xkcd.com/236/

[Lostfiniel]

It seems like most people in the world spend their time wondering what everyone else is going to do for them.

I'd have to say that most of the problems I have seen between customers and the like come from that. The customers seem to think they are owed something that they clearly do not have the right to demand. Or, in this case, they feel that they have the right to delay other people's lives because it is more convenient for them. :\

[crazylegs]

The players:

"BF" ad libs ringing his order (scans paper towels, chocolate syrup & condoms, holds up bananas for cashier approval, etc. [wonder what he has planned this evening])

Brain Bleach, Brain Bleach, wheres the damn Bleach!

[Becks]

"BF" ad libs ringing his order (scans paper towels, chocolate syrup & condoms, holds up bananas for cashier approval, etc.

I'd do that for fun. Even by myself. I'm weird.

[JuniorMintz]

WTB speaks (dropping the nice'n'sweet act): Well you don't have to be such a fucking sm*rt bitch about it!

HAHAHA, too funny! I'd have said "You don't have to be such a fucking *dumb* bitch about it, either, so get your ass to the back of the line!"

(Side note: Why is "smart" censored and "fucking" not? That made me giggle a bit, lol! )

3AW: And you need to learn not to mess with a f*cking convict! I'll f*ck you up.

HURRAY! 3AW makes me happy, that was too funny!

[Shengirl]

paper towels, chocolate syrup & condoms, holds up bananas for cashier approval, etc. [wonder what he has planned this evening]).

That was the funniest part of your whole post!

Good on your mom and that other woman for speaking up, though I'm a little disappointed you didn't say anything in your mother's defense.

[HALFHUMANHALFZOMBIE]

ooooooookay. what a story. My peeves are people who are entitled to be in line but leave a big, huge space in front of them so other people can simply cut in line. What pisses me off from entitled line-up whores is when in a fast food restaurant waiting at a till that doesn't clearly says it's closed the person is working another till, this asshole just walked into the fast food restaurant and waited at the right till, i went in front of him and he said, excuse me I was first. I said no you just walked in and the lady served him instead of me but she apologized to me.