How Not to Expidite Your Pizza Delivery

[Dips]

ME: I don't know about guarantee but I can probably increase your chances.
SC: How?
ME: The sooner I put your order in, the sooner you'll get it.

That sounds exactly like what I wish I could say to the idiots who want me to put them through to Carl in tech support when he's busy with another customer. The procedure is to leave a message on Carl's voice mail and he calls them back.

So you'd think they would get right on leaving that message to ensure Carl getting back to them ASAP, right?

No. Instead they argue and complain to me about how they need to talk to Carl right now and demand to know EXACTLY WHEN he's going to call them back.

Now, it's nice to have little old me to vent to about their frustration with having to wait for Carl and I don't mind being a good listener, but every second spent venting to me is a second that another customer can leave a voice mail in Carl's queue ahead of them, pushing their "turn" further and further back.

The more urgent it is, the more they need to shut up about it and do what they need to do.

[PepperElf]

I am sorry the 30 minute Domino's delivery went bye bye 15 years ago.

and good riddance! that policy caused a lot of accidents.
my first boyfriend was one of the hits - not domino's but a local chain with a similar policy. brain damage isn't pretty.

[RetailWorkhorse]

I bake my own pizzas at home. That way I don't bother anyone and I can eat straight off the pan (why use a paper plate if I don't have to?).

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Those surveys need to die in a fire. If customers are really happy or really displeased with a place's service, they can make their own phone call or write their own letter.

Some people lie on those surveys because they think it may get them freebies, or just for no reason at all. And like secret shoppers, the corporate suits treat them as 100% accurate and don't question them.

[Stlouisx50]

I'm not that much of a SC, honestly. Very rarely will I stiff on a tip (actually, very rarely will I order delivery pizza, but I digress), and if I scale back on a tip, it's because the pizza is late. And by late, I mean unreasonably late. Part of this is that I have a pretty good idea how long things take, and we do take circumstances into account. So if we're told 45-60 minutes and it's been 75-90 and the pizza place says the driver left 20 minutes ago... yeah. There's an issue. (If the pizza place says there was a problem and they had to re-make the pizza or they forgot to do it the first time, then I won't penalize the driver.)

Basically, if the pizza is old by the time I get it, it's on the driver.

100% agreed. Exactly my thoughts when reading this story. Now yes it may not be the pizza drivers fault either. It may be the fact that there were not enough workers hired to work in the kitchen, however either way if you order and pay for a pizza that cost around $4.00 and you pay the expensive markup +the delivery fee +the tip on top of it... Go buy a pizza, or Go pick it up.

[Samaliel]

How do you know which customer gave which answers to the survey ?

I can see things are done differently in your area, but around here, I'm pretty sure individual places never know which customer said what, in order to prevent them from doing things not condoned by these boards policy...

Because since they delivered a pizza to the liar / scammer, they actually know where they live. It's a bit sad, because that enables some people to act halfway decent when they order and get delivered and then being total dickheads whent they reply to the survey. But no matter how I might feel they'd deserve punishment, I'd rather they do not have their food tampered with or other such nasty things...

[Racket_Man]

I would say, "You're kidding", but I know you're not. And corporate saw this as a bad thing?

yup we can not contest or change a customer survey in any way shape or form. Even if it is justified contention and we can PROVE it is a scam. we had another one about 2 years ago go the same way execpt go waaaaayyyy farther wrong (the worst survey score EVER like 25 out of 100). slow night near the end of our shift. get phone order for a couple of pizzas and breadsticks going about 1 mile away. order gets made promptly and sent out in like 12 minutes. customer gets order 17 mintues after order is placed. standard quoted time is 30 minutes. driver returns with semi-decent tip.

customer is called for a survey. customer proceeds to RIP into us ie pizza is wrong, pizza is cold, pizza does nto have enough toppings, delivery is LATE, driver is not professional looking, driver was rude, driver did not exhibit professional behavior, driver not helpful, driver not friendly, etc. I swear some of these so called "customers" would not know professional or helpful behavior if it bit them in the ass several times

when we got wind of this survery the manager checked the schedule, and even went back and pulled the receipt for the order. pulled the dispatch/cashout logs did all of his homework was ready to fight but to no avail. the DM and our franchise made the survey score stand as is

it is stuff like this and "statements" like "driver needs to be more helpful" that usually kill us. I mean what do they want us to do take out their trash walk their dog mow the lawn, stand there serve and feed them their meal wipe their asses when they leave a shit afterward??????

these "surveys" are soooo subjective and also waaaayyyyy biased toward the "customer" in believeability. they are our industry'd secrete shoppers with all of the bullshit to boot.

[thehippie777]

I have gotten a form of this: Guest is on the phone with me and requests extra pillow or something...then they ask how long it will take in that..."voice". I have gotten to the point of actually saying, "Well, when I am able to get off the phone it will be just momentarily."

If there is going to be a wait, I inform people.

[tropicsgoddess]

I'd rather my pizza guy come to my house with my stuff and him/her in one piece. Tip good and be nice to them is a surefire way to get your pizza to your home faster, but also ordering at a less busier time!

[MadMike]

Basically, if the pizza is old by the time I get it, it's on the driver.

Agreed. I don't automatically assume it's the driver's fault if it came later than what I was told, but there were a few times that when it got there, it was barely even warm. Unfortunately, by the time I found that out, I had already tipped the driver, and he'd already left.

[Sarlon]

saturday nights at my plae when I was still with my BF at the time often saw us ordering 8 - 10 large one topping pizzas, the domino's we used was literally less then a half mile from our house, and we often ordered at like 4 or 5 (off peak times for that store) for them to be delivered around 7. first time we did this the poor driver could NOT find our house (2 roads with the same name almost 2 miles apart and one's a circle, and ones a road). He finally got to us..appologizing profusely, almost 20 minutes late. We honestly didn't care, we were all laid back with chips, and soda and gaming, and we tipped him nicely (like $10 I think for a $30 order).

After that we ALWAYS got our pizza about the time we ordered it for, and the driver always got anywhere from a $5 tip to a $10 tip depending on how much we could scrounge together and how many pizza's we ordered.

Needless to say, the managers and drivers almost knew me by first name (I was normally the one to order) and they always were good about placing my order and making sure that I got what I ordered correctly.

Morale of the story? Be nice no matter what, tip well, and watch what gets done without being an SC or EW.

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

I have ordered many pizzas before and have often been quoted the 40-60 minute timeframe but it's almost always been 40 minutes or quite often less. I can't really recall a time I had to wait a full hour for a pizza.

Of course if you really want a quick turnaround and live near a pizza place you can drive your own ass over there and do the walk in thing.

[Samaliel]

Around here, most pizza joints have a variety of discounts, from free Coke to Buy One, Get One free, if you go and pick up your order. So unless I felt very lazy / tired, I wouldn't bother ordering a delivery. Yes, I order from the places with the BOGO discounts. I mean, free pizza, dude. And some of them make the tastiest pizzas in the world (La Boïte à Pizza rocks).

[Nephy]

Hey, I have a marvelous idea.. maybe I could sell it and make millions.

I can see it now, info-mercials about the best selling e-book that promises to teach you the secrets of getting your pizza at the time you want it!

But wait! Since you fabulous folks here at cs.com are such loyal customers, I'll tell you the secret for free!

*cheesey announcer voice*

You want your pizza at 7:00? You want it to actually be there around 7:00?

ORDER IT AT 6:00!

*insert gasps and wild applause from the studio-audience*

Seriously, is it such a big freaken secret that most people eat dinner around the same time?

You, douchebag SC, are not in fact the only person in the area that gets hungry in the evening.

[Emrld]

When I order a pizza - I ask them to tell the driver they will hear barking but that the dog is less than 10lbs and hidding.
The day a delivery driver called me from their car to come out to get the pizza because they are scared of dogs . . .I didn't tip as well as normal and I called the shop up.
Some addition info . . .my house has the driveway in front. - next to the front door. The driver could easily have pulled into the driveway. But no he insisted on staying out at the street . . .so I had to find shoes to go out to him.
Also, why did he agree to take a delivery to house with a dog . . .when he knows he is afraid of dogs.
In the future should I not tell them to tell the driver?
I thought it was kind of me to let them know - hey you will hear barking. . . but she isn't coming near the door . . .and well she is a little dog with a big bark.