Can Easter be a Sign of the Apocalypse? (long)

[PepperElf]

First Sunday after the first full moon after the spring equinox. That's why it keeps moving.

During the Easter homily the priest said there's some movement trying to get it on a set day. O_o (ain't exactly for that myself)


For myself however I was kinda glad Friendly's was open. Made a point to tip really well since they had to work that day.

[SG15Z]

I had one just like that a couple of years ago, she tried to use a coupon which couldn't be used on an article already on offer. She wouldn't believe me so I pointed her to the line which said "Coupon does not apply to articles in this flier", her reaction?
"But that's the fine print, we never read that!"

Yeah try using that with a lawyer. Idiots.

[Jester]

I don't know why, but this reminds me of a closing line that a local magician uses when performing at Mallory Square's Sunset Celebration.

At the end of his act, when it is time to pass the hat for tips, on his table he has, from his final trick, several different large items of fruit. (Don't ask.) And he gives his tip spiel, at the end saying the following in his English accent: "I'm very hungry. I don't like fruit. I'm very lonely. I don't like fruit."

Hilarious shit!

Oh, and by the way, the people who are already AT your store and want you to be open the next day so they can get their stuff then? That's not procrastination. That is laziness and idiocy. I am the Patron Saint of Procrastinators, but I do mine fairly intelligently. This is not an example of intelligent procrastination.

[Sir Spaniard the 12th]

Oh, you promised you wouldn't do fruit this week.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

They might have been preparing for their self defence classes against fresh fruit.

Think about it...

First, you get him to drop the banana. Then you eat the banana.

[Mister]

"Well, I didn't think I should've had to read it! I never read those signs. Why should I have to?"

I had one just like that a couple of years ago, she tried to use a coupon which couldn't be used on an article already on offer. She wouldn't believe me so I pointed her to the line which said "Coupon does not apply to articles in this flier", her reaction?
"But that's the fine print, we never read that!"

[Becks]

I'm so glad that I didn't work on Easter itself (the store was open until 2 pm), and that I worked in the surprisingly slow floral department the day before.

[SG15Z]

But life at the grocery has been hard this last week. Now I shall exorcise some of the retail demons by posting it here. Here we go...

Indeed it has. I feel your pain!

---

Now, don't get me wrong, I LOVE the place I work for. It's a good company, they do great work, I like the people I work with, the managers are nice, and they actually care about me as a person and not just a worker. And, for the most part, the customers are really good people.

And yet they wouldn't hire me because I "wasn't what they were looking for." or something like that. I guess my 4+ years in the grocery business, and 1+ years of FES experience (ASM at your company) wasn't good enough for them. At least for the store I applied at.

And, in keeping with their 'we love our workers' way, and the fact that the store is Christian-based, we closed the store for Easter Sunday.

Yes I know. That's one of the few reasons I hate y'all. Because Kroger doesn't close, so as a result everyone and their dog comes to us because we're the only ones in town that's open. Oh and everyone and their cat calls in leaving us majorly short handed!

"Well, I didn't think I should've had to read it! I never read those signs. Why should I have to?"

Well she should start, because that excuse never works with the cops.

Then I got a woman who asked, 'When are you going to slash this to 75% off?' I just said I didn't know and luckily she left me alone.

I got that question too. Two days after Easter........I just tell them I have no clue that's a corporate decision, but they usually don't do it till at least a week or more after the holiday. If there's anything left.....

[Kheldarson]

First Sunday after the first full moon after the spring equinox. That's why it keeps moving.

[cinema guy]

Well, Easter is always on a full moon...

I thought it was the first Sunday after the first full moon of spring. Or something like that.

[Andrew B.]

, 'Keep out of store, pythons have been released in produce section', then you would've been screwed.

They might have been preparing for their self defence classes against fresh fruit.

Think about it...

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Stealing from another person's cart. Woah. Good thing that person didn't have their purse in there too or she might have helped herself to some $. Seems like that type.

I thought something like that only happened at the WallyWorld on Black Friday.

Everytime you think people can't sink any lower, they grab a shovel and start digging.

[Gabrielle Proctor]

One woman absolutely flipped out when I told her this. "What? Why are you closing?" (Uh, because I have a LIFE outside of this job? Jerk.) I said, "Because it's a holiday and the workers want to spend time with their families."

She said, "Well, this comes as a shock. How come nobody told me?"

"We put a sign on the door."

"Well, I didn't think I should've had to read it! I never read those signs. Why should I have to?"

This person fails at life for three reasons:

1- Treating retail employees like slaves who don't deserve holidays.
2- Being shocked that you were closed on easter when she should be more suprised if you stayed open.
3- Getting mad that someone actually expects her to be able to read.

[StanFlouride]

What if it had been, 'Keep out of store, pythons have been released in produce section',

In my best Samuel L Jackson voice:
"I.Am.Sick. And tired. Of G--damn Muthaf--kin Snakes. In the G--damn Muthaf--kin STORE!!"

(an epic movie that just about writes itself!)

[Primer]

You mean I have to READ the sign???

Now, by sheer experience (and I know that several of you will back me up on this), that even though we posted a sign on the door (in English and Spanish) that we would be closed Easter Sunday, not all people would read it.

She said, "Well, this comes as a shock. How come nobody told me?"

"We put a sign on the door."

"Well, I didn't think I should've had to read it! I never read those signs. Why should I have to?"

I basically had to bite my tongue to keep from giving her my 'Read or Die, Knowledge is the basis of our democracy' speech and keep quiet. Come on. Why would you not read the sign? What if it had been, 'Keep out of store, pythons have been released in produce section', then you would've been screwed.

The really sad thing is that Austin is one of the highest educated cities in the U.S.

And does anybody else remember the signs that used to be posted in the basket section at Pier 1? Something along the lines of, "Caution, we haven't seen our pet cobra in three weeks."

GW, I keep wondering which neighborhood you must work in to get such EWs, but then I realize that Austin is much different now than when I grew up there. The EWs are no longer restricted to Northwest Hills, Round Rock, Lakeway, or Bee Caves...they're everywhere now!