Return of soul sucking vampire

[Blueberry]

Well she came back on Monday. The hopefully final showdown.
If you would like to see the original thread, see here:

http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=12402&highlight=soul+sucking+vampire

This time, the manager was here and told her she was banned.
She was, of course, returning more stuff and attempting to buy/order more books.
The manager gently told her that this was the last time, and she was no longer welcome in the store.
In her creepy monotone, without blinking, she wanted to know why.
M-Manager
CL-Creepy lady
(Now I don't put question marks after her questions, because she doesn't really ask questions...Try saying How are you today in a monotone and you'll see, it's not really a question.)
M-Well ma'am, we have received numerous staff complaints...'
CL (cuts him off- 'What kind of complaints.'
M-'Ma'am, you are demanding and ....'
CL(Cuts him off again)-'How am I demanding.'
M-'Well...'
At this point she is continuously cutting him off. He can only get one word out.)
CL-'HOW am I demanding.'
M-'Ma'am...'
CL-'HOW AM I demanding.'
M-'Ma'am...'
CL-'HOW AM I DEMANDING.'
So he keeps trying to tell her, and she gets progressively louder with each statement, 'till he said she was literally shrieking at him.
Finally he just yells back at her 'THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!'
Then she blinks.
And says 'I would like to return these.'
He says 'FINE! But this is it.'
And hopefully it is.

(Oh, and I don't have Oprah up with the religious texts because I consider her holy or anything. Books endorsed by Oprah usually keep me away, and I figured it would be a good thing to use to keep someone away.)

[Crazeyal]

"and it's a STORE not a %#$# Library!"

[Sliceanddice]

...... ok that conversation creeped me out again.

Tell us if she trys to come back please.

[ArenaBoy]

SSV: "HOW AM I DEMANDING?!"

"Well, you're a bitch and you're scaring all the books. Get out of my store!"

*Joking* I'd suggest putting up crosses and getting garlic and stakes and mallets ready. As soon as she reappears start showing the crosses to her if she reappears. Also get holy water and a firehose ready as vampires cannot stand water of any kind. /joking.

[friendofjimmyk]

Wow, I read this post, then went back to the other post...just wow. I would be completely creeped out.

[Polenicus]

Well, I've been saving my one freebie crazy episode, but I think this situation qualifies for it.

(For those who don't know, I personally believe we are all allocated at least one incident where we can act completely batshit loco without any serious repercussions.)

I will get the holy water and bible if you can get me a flight out there. Then I'll just camp out in your store, and when she arrives, I'll jump out and fling holy water at her and scream 'THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!' until the police come.

That should solve the problem, and I may even get a free ride home from the nice policemen if I promise never to come back! :D

[Boozy]

(For those who don't know, I personally believe we are all allocated at least one incident where we can act completely batshit loco without any serious repercussions.)


Marvelous idea. May I embrace your personal philosophy as my own?

I think I'll save my batshit episode for as long as possible. It will give me something to look forward to.

Back on topic, I'm glad that she's finally been banned, and I'm happy that it went as smoothly as it did, considering her personality.

[Demonoid Phenomenon]

I don't know how I missed the original thread, but that's messed up.
I've dealt with similar people though not on such a 'grand' scale.
Sometimes they can be co-workers as well...

[Dreamstalker]

Why did the manager even allow the return?

Even reading about the vampire creeps me out. Here's hoping this is the last you'll see of her (although, I do feel sorry for whoever she decides to inflict herself on now).

[Becks]

Better hope she doesn't hex the whole store.

Biscuit. She creeps me out.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

"And says 'I would like to return these.'
He says 'FINE! But this is it.'
And hopefully it is."

Yeah. And these aren't the droids you're looking for.

Don't hope too hard.

[Ciarrai]

Hey blueberry, what kind of clothes does the vampire wear?

[Lace Neil Singer]

Have you tried saying "Christo" near her, bychance?

[blas]

A quick way to tell if she truly is some kind of walking demonic being or vampire would be to wear a cross necklace or have a Holy Bible strategically placed nearby the cash register.

Although since she's banned now, I guess you needn't worry anymore.

[zzapp the witch]

Using Oprah as a warding spell???


THAT'S FUCKING GENIOUS!!!

[karma_gypsy]

Just a suggestion.

Place "happy" and pretty things around the store. Smiley faces. Lots of bright colors, yellows and pinks. Flowers. Pictures of smiling children, teddy bears and balloons. When she steps foot in the store . . . she'll probably melt.

[Gravekeeper]

You need a young priest and an old priest. ><

[Giranan]

You need a young priest and an old priest. ><

And Simon Belmont, just to be completely safe. Yeesh, just reading these stories creeped me out... I'm glad the manager stepped in.

[Blueberry]

Hey blueberry, what kind of clothes does the vampire wear?

She seems to enjoy neon green tracksuits and long pale green coats.

[BusBus]

Jeebus, your soul sucking vampire posts have really given me the willies.
Just for fun, if she shows up next time, pull a mirror out. See if she reflects.

[Marxfan]

I used to work in a bookstore, and I feel your pain. My store attracted all sorts of headcases...

[Starlord]

Arizona used to give you a temporary paper permit that acted as your driver's license until the real deal was mailed from Phoenix. One of our deputies stopped a kid one night who had a paper license and an attitude. The more the kid ranted, the madder the deputy got. Finally, he opened his mouth, carefully stuffed the license in his mouth and ate it. When the case came to JP court, teh kid yelled, "He ate my license." The JP looked at the deputy, who shrugged with a puzzled look on his face. The kid was fined for not having a license in possession, and got his regular license a few days later. I guarantee you, from then on, when he got stopped, he was the most respectful, meek person you ever saw.