Rapscallion
08-10-2007, 06:00 PM
I forgot to repost this after the last hack.
I work in wholefood wholesale. Sometimes, I work in the customer services department. People sometimes phone up.
"Hi. I was just wondering if you had any dried peas?"
I glanced over my shoulder at the glowering warehouse behind. "Er, yes?"
"Great! Can I have some, please?"
Whoa there, Binky. Let's get this in the right order, shall we? "What kind of peas?"
"Er, I don't know. Which ones do you have?"
I went through the list and he settled on green split peas. I was starting to get a touch suspicious by this point. "How many would you need?"
"Nine hundred thousand."
"Nine hundred thousand?" I asked.
"Well, thereabouts," he confirmed.
We trade in commodities, and when a crop goes short we get people trying to buy us out of certain goods, but it didn't smell like such an inquiry. They'd normally ask for a number of kilos... "Nine hundred thousand individual peas?" I asked.
"Er, yes?"
"So how many kilo is that? We have twelve-and-a-half kilo sacks, and we have twenty-five kilo sacks."
"Don't they have a count on the bags?"
"Indeed they do. 12.5 Kg or twenty-five kilo. How many would you need?"
"Er..."
About this point, I realised he was serious and badly out of his depth. "Where are you?" He gave his postcode and I checked where he was. "Ah, there's one of our retailers just around the corner from you - about two hundred yards."
"I've never heard of them."
"Well, they're one of our biggest customers. Anyway, if you go in there and buy a kilo of green split peas and count them, I'm sure you'd get a good idea of how many you need."
"Oh..."
I was on form that day.
Rapscallion
I work in wholefood wholesale. Sometimes, I work in the customer services department. People sometimes phone up.
"Hi. I was just wondering if you had any dried peas?"
I glanced over my shoulder at the glowering warehouse behind. "Er, yes?"
"Great! Can I have some, please?"
Whoa there, Binky. Let's get this in the right order, shall we? "What kind of peas?"
"Er, I don't know. Which ones do you have?"
I went through the list and he settled on green split peas. I was starting to get a touch suspicious by this point. "How many would you need?"
"Nine hundred thousand."
"Nine hundred thousand?" I asked.
"Well, thereabouts," he confirmed.
We trade in commodities, and when a crop goes short we get people trying to buy us out of certain goods, but it didn't smell like such an inquiry. They'd normally ask for a number of kilos... "Nine hundred thousand individual peas?" I asked.
"Er, yes?"
"So how many kilo is that? We have twelve-and-a-half kilo sacks, and we have twenty-five kilo sacks."
"Don't they have a count on the bags?"
"Indeed they do. 12.5 Kg or twenty-five kilo. How many would you need?"
"Er..."
About this point, I realised he was serious and badly out of his depth. "Where are you?" He gave his postcode and I checked where he was. "Ah, there's one of our retailers just around the corner from you - about two hundred yards."
"I've never heard of them."
"Well, they're one of our biggest customers. Anyway, if you go in there and buy a kilo of green split peas and count them, I'm sure you'd get a good idea of how many you need."
"Oh..."
I was on form that day.
Rapscallion