It starts, keep me in your thoughts

[technical.angel]

The Freshmen come today. It all starts in about a half hour.

If my brain survives, I should have massive stories of student and/or parent incompence.

I scared.

SAVE ME!!

Jenni :angel:

[lordlundar]

Good luck Jenni! We'll be here for you.

Hopefully you survive to tell these stories, they could be good!

[technical.angel]

My first story started yesterday.

Girl called. She can't get her computer online.

I tell her to bring it in, as the dept head didn't want us doing appointments anymore (choir of angels sing). She says she can't. Apparently, she had gotten this virus, see, and if she unplugs her keyboard, it won't work anymore, and she'll have to buy a new one.

I make a work order, making it quite clear that drop in computing was our priority, and we'd get to the appointments when we can.

She calls back today, whining. She demands that someone come out since she was here BEFORE the freshmen. I tell her that there's no way that can happen.

She pulls her first card. She's a web designer, so she needs internet access so she can work. (Keep in mind that this IS a full time undergrad student). That garnered no sympathy. So she pulled out the bigger card.

Daddy's in Iraq. She talks to him via email and IM. I tell her she can access email through any lab computer. But no, they IM!!!

I ask her to bring in her computer, without disconnecting her keyboard, but now, the mouse does it too.

I have her check the biggest issue, not it. I tell her I'll get someone over there as soon as possible, but that soon wouldn't be very soon. I finally get her off the phone.

Bossman says no way no how to the appointment. I have to call her back. :cry:

This is riduclus, we're the helpdesk, so we should help her get connected. And she shouldn't have to pay $30 for the priviledge. ( for a new keyboard and mouse)

I try a little more troubleshooting. The problem was she wouldn't shut up long enough for me to do much. Basically, she wanted someone to come to her computer, and she wasn't going to be happy any other way. I'm totally fed up, so I pass her on to Bossman. Not to long after, I hear the dept head's phone ringing.

Apparently, she got more snippy with him than with me. She demanded if we make her bring in her computer, that we give her $30 to buy a new keyboard and mouse.

J finally called her on that, saying that he's NEVER heard of anything viral that would cause that damage, and even if it's hardware related on the board, that the old keyboard and mouse should work.

Then she pulled the "With as long as I've been on the phone, someone could have been over here and done."

I told J that at that point, if someone had gone when I first called her, they'd probably just be getting to the dorm at that time. We scoffed and laughed.

Dept head came in, and we warned her as to what she should find on her voicemail.

Of course, there was no voicemail.

Dept head said that she better call back soon (as she wasn't going to call the trouble child herself), cause she was leaving Friday, and wouldn't be getting back until Wednesday.

J has proclaimed that he and I wouldn't touch the girl's computer.

I can only imagine what card she'll pull when next she calls.

Jenni :angel:

[Kusanagi]

If she's a web designer she should know that there isn't any virus capable of physically damaging a keyboard or mouse.

Or is there? Theoretically, how would it work?

[toolbert]

God, I hated the freshmen when they came in...I used to work in student housing, so I can only half feel your pain. Good luck and don't let the newbies keep you down!

[LostMyMind]

If she's a web designer she should know that there isn't any virus capable of physically damaging a keyboard or mouse.

Or is there? Theoretically, how would it work?

No, there is no virus that can cause "physical" damage to keyboard or mouse. The worst it can do is "mess" up the signals coming in. Buying a new mouse/keyboard usually just reinstalls the drivers for it. Sounds like she got a virus that corrupts data on the hard-drive randomly or her hard-drive is failing and it has nothing to do with a virus. (You'll be surprise how much a failing hard-drive makes windows behave like it got a virus)

[Banrion]

I would think that the most a virus can do to a keyboard and mouse is corrupt the drivers.

[Dreamstalker]

Windows sometimes likes messing with various hardware drivers, especially if hardware is swapped in and out without previous drivers (if drivers were required) being uninstalled properly. Or the OS might decide for no good reason to do it (I know it likes trying to redetect my mouse and KB every few weeks).

[Dips]

You need to do what I did during lunch today. We just released a new update yesterday and are getting lots of sucky phone calls and emails from people who didn't/wouldn't read and/or listen.

So I created a list of the 24 most common mistakes/assumptions our customers make, made them into Bingo scorecards and passed them out to my co-workers. First person to get five in a row wins...something. ;)

You would probably have different items on your Bingo cards, of course. Instead of "User expects free update because he got a free update last year" yours could say "User complains about having to bring in computer."

And instead of saying "After being told price for update, user asks if he can have just one new feature and pay a couple dollars" yours could say "user brings in laptop full of porn and denies downloading it."

Have fun!

[Tanasi]

God, I hated the freshmen when they came in...I used to work in student housing, so I can only half feel your pain. Good luck and don't let the newbies keep you down!

Generally you don't have to execute more than 3 or 4 freshman before they get the idea.

[stormtreader]

If her method of plugging the keyboard/mouse in is the standard pin-bending "jam the plugs in the holes until they dont fall out anymore, then gets someone else to properly plug the new ones in", she might have had this virus for a while :roll:

[symposes]

The students come back tommorrow.
Im on the crew that helps move them in.
Gord Help me.
(Im an electrician. I should be making the lights work. This is the last time i ever do anything that isnt overtime, thats volunteer)

[technical.angel]

Well, after completely pissing J off (which I didn't think was possible), and not leaving a voice message for the dept head, the dept head called HER boss (first to make sure she wasn't someone important, it happens) the Vice President of Administration said she follows the rules. Ha.

So, now, if she calls again, and S (dept head) is on her trip, and she doesn't like the idea of waiting for S to get back, we're to tell her the VP of Administration said to follow the rules.

I can actually see this taken to the President, who hopefully will be on our side too. I was kinda surprised that the VP was on our side.

Here's to higher powers supporting their minions!

Jenni :angel:

[Gurndigarn]

How does she know that if the keyboard/mouse get unplugged, they'll stop working? IE, if it's happened before, how did they start working again?

I know a few computers have trouble recognizing hardware that's plugged in once the computer's started, but other than that, I'm scratching my head.

[Comp_geek]

She probably has no frigging clue WTH she's doing. The whole virus thing is probably because she had a friend connect her computer i.e. all peripherals and she's never been bothered to even learn how to do it.

I hate people like that. "Oh well I just need to use the computer, it's not my business to learn anything more than the programs I need to use."

Unfortunately that's the attitude of many people around the world and especially on campuses (or is that campii) cos you know "We got to kolledge we godda be smrt!"

[lordlundar]

She probably has no frigging clue WTH she's doing. The whole virus thing is probably because she had a friend connect her computer i.e. all peripherals and she's never been bothered to even learn how to do it.

I hate people like that. "Oh well I just need to use the computer, it's not my business to learn anything more than the programs I need to use."

Unfortunately that's the attitude of many people around the world and especially on campuses (or is that campii) cos you know "We got to kolledge we godda be smrt!"

yeah, or to paraphrase the BOFH

"People who know where the power switch for their computer automatically think they know everything about computers."

[JustADude]

yeah, or to paraphrase the BOFH

"People who know where the power switch for their computer automatically think they know everything about computers."

Ah, but if you're talking about the switch on the power supply, then that is, indeed, an advanced secret, my friend. I enlighten people about when they ask me how to make their computer work better. Flicking that switch repeatedly while the computer is pluged in will unlock the Magic Smoke from its home, and you will be granted your wish, a new computer.

[Customer Beating Robot]

If she's a web designer she should know that there isn't any virus capable of physically damaging a keyboard or mouse.

Or is there? Theoretically, how would it work?

The virus would have to attack the computer on the most basic I/O level, by rewriting the BIOS or CMOS. That is next to impossible for your average virus writer (If it weren't it would already be done.). And it would be difficult for even an experienced programmer as you are talking assembly or even binary coding in some cases.

[LostMyMind]

The worst hardware damage a virus can do is blank out the BIOS. Which can be pretty bad depending on the motherboard. But still, it's not "damage" just been blanked out. You can restore the BIOS (again, depending on the motherboard).

A virus can cause the hard-drive to crash it's head is a thing of the past. You'll have to have one serious old hard-drive for that to work. I doubt anyone is still using a hard-drive that about the same size (datawise) as a floppy. Now days all mechanical parts operate on it's own software independent of what the motherboard/BIOS tells it to do.

[technical.angel]

well, after talking to the student one last time, she said that she had gotten a keyboard failure at bookup when she started up her computer and decided that it meant that her keyboard and mouse HAD to be replaced!!

Jenni :angel:

[Great Unknown]

So I created a list of the 24 most common mistakes/assumptions our customers make, made them into Bingo scorecards and passed them out to my co-workers. First person to get five in a row wins...something. ;)

Nice! Got a scan or transcription of your bingo card, 'cause that's going to be really useful in the next few semesters...:o

[repsac]

:D You know, there's a fake virus bouncing about that scrambles your keyboard and causes your mouse pointer to vanish. I wonder, if perhaps, she didn't get a hold of one of those? :headdesk:

[Dips]

Nice! Got a scan or transcription of your bingo card, 'cause that's going to be really useful in the next few semesters...:o

OK here is the text from the 25 squares (24 regular squares and one free square):


NEW RELEASE BINGO

If you get one of the following inquiries, mark the space. Five in a row (either across, down or diagonally) WINS!


1. Asks if update is free without providing license number
2. Expects free update because a free update was received last year.
3. Thinks the build date in Help/About is his purchase date.
4. Uses all his activations in one day and asks for more.
5. Tells us he is using a later version than he is eligible for
6. Leaves “this is licensed for one user” out of the text after being told to enter it
7. Registers a license without giving the serial/license number
8. Thinks license number/text is activation code
9. Tries to activate right after his order was placed, even though told to wait a day for his data to go in the system
10. Asks for an activation code without providing a reference code and/or license number.
11. Complains about copy protection.
12. Mixes up registration and activation
13. FREE SPACE
14. Tries to activate a license more than 5 years out of date for the latest version
15. Asks us to guarantee that version released in 2000 or earlier will run on WinXP.
16. When told the price of new version, asks if he can get just one feature for free.
17. Asks for an unlocking password for the latest download even though we haven't used an unlocking password since 2003.
18. Mixes up installation and activation
19. Tries to activate a license which was returned for a refund.
20. Throws away license card and instructions before installing and calls us because he is stuck.
21. Brags he is going to pirate our software.
22. Thinks the example license number from the manual is his license number and tries to register it.
23. Registered user tries to get activated by registering again.
24. Complains about having to pay.
25. Demands license text for a license belonging to someone else.

Obviously, this is specific to my company and industry. You will probably want to write your own bingo card. Enjoy! :)

[Dreamstalker]

You'll have to have one serious old hard-drive for that to work. I doubt anyone is still using a hard-drive that about the same size (datawise) as a floppy.
I think I have an ancient HDD of that sort (scavenged from a 286) floating around somewhere...damn thing was probably responsible for half the weight of the entire machine.
well, after talking to the student one last time, she said that she had gotten a keyboard failure at bookup when she started up her computer and decided that it meant that her keyboard and mouse HAD to be replaced!!

Pfft, I get that sometimes when reconnecting OEM machines. Reboot and 9 times out of 10 everything's fine again.