Just the Two of us at long last... (pg 13)

[AnqeiicDemise]

WARNING:

Slight sexual encounter and violence directed at inanimate objects.


On to the story:

Lately, with the way life has been for the both of us, i.e. me working my ass off and the husband actively looking for a job, and the damed cat going into heat, our 'love life' has been severely lacking. Its hard to get 'in the mood' when my back's wrenched because of the shitty chairs at work, or he's drained from walking all over the place or when we're making out like high school sweethearts and the cat jumps between us, butt in the air, howling "LOVE ME!"

Needless, I was surprised when he managed to make me feel 'less tired' than the three hours of sleep I had made me feel.

The lights were low, the cat was asleep... ALL WAS PERFECT....

That is until his hand caressed my skin the wrong way and I was sent into a fit of giggles. (fyi, I'm highly ticklish. Yes, I laugh my ass off when the hubs kisses my eyelids the wrong way.) Okay, so now we're back to 'crazy love bird' status. Its okay. Sometimes we can get past the tickle torture and on to Heaven.

But.. of course, the Fates would not let it be.

So I'm kicking, thrashing, cackling. I'm laughing so hard the husband pauses to state that I should hush a bit because we'll have the neighbor come pound on our door again for being too loud.

I roll my eyes and begin the countertickle.

And then it happens...

It shakes. It trembles and then... caves.

Ladies and gentlemen this:

http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/S89839415

was teetering on its last leg.

We somehow broke four out of five legs (the headboard had three).


With the mood completely ruined, we then go about the business of dismantling the damned thing.

Can we find the allen wrench?

Of course not.

Now, mind you, about two hours ago I broke down and ground less than a quarter of a 50mg of benadryl into the cat's food. It took her an hour and a half to finally eat enough to make her sleepy. (I know it sounds evil but damnit, I need my sleep!) Its about 10 pm, I have to be up by 3 and well, I'm sure the pain in the ass 'blast music videos until the wee hours' teenage bastard has church or something to attend to.

But then again, I'm not thinking. I'm irritated. I want the bed gone so I could, at the very least, sleep on the floor.

What's my bright, sexually-frustrated influenced idea?

Grab the hammer and whack away at the *one* good leg the damned gimpy bed has left on to even the piece of shit out. I don't mind having a legless frame to sleep on.

CLANG!! CLANG!! CLANG!!

"Demise, no!"

"MEOWR!!!LOVEME!!MEOWR!!!-paw,purr,waves ass in the air then rolls over onto her back to spaz at my feet.-"

At least the neighbor wasn't home.


Long story short, it took me five minutes to break the bed apart for good. "Ikea test all their products rigorously, Demise. I'm sure you can get rough on your bed just fine!" my ass. (when I first got it, I was scared I'd break the damned thing rolling over.)

Oh well. At least we weren't having sex.

But then again, I wouldn't be so frustrated in the first place if we had, now wouldn't I?

[blas]

Cats in heat are so irritating!

Baby is 6 1/2 and we've never had her spayed, and she goes into heat at least 3 times a year, for a week or two each time. Ironically enough, we kind of ignore her howling and walking around with her butt up in the air, because she is normally such an angry, mean, vicious cat that the only time she is nice and lets people near her and even touch her is when she's in heat.

That's really sad about the intimacy problem. I blame work.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Cats in heat are so irritating!

Not just the queens - the toms can be incredibly destructive once they hit sexual maturation (stench of male cat piss, anyone?). This is why I'm a FIRM believer that ALL pets, unless you intend to breed them, should be spayed/neutered. It's healthier for the animal, gives peace of mind for the owner, and ensures that no unwanted litters (which almost always end up in bad straits like at kill shelters) are born.

[blas]

Female cats spray, too. Not as much as the men, but they do. We caught Baby doing it in the corner.

[AnqeiicDemise]

I know I need to spay her. I just haven't had the money.

I've looked into low cost clinics but the way they operate bother me. I don't know if WA is the same as in CA. Low cost clinics over there cut down their cost in the usage of anesthesia and pain meds after.

I'm sorry, but as a human being I would *hate* to wake up in the middle of surgery where my womb's bein taken out and I'd hate it even more to have very little/inefective pain meds for the recovery period. I won't do the same to my cat.

I know how the VCA offices work (as I worked for them as a receptionist for six months) and I want *them* to do the surgery on Patches. Thing is, the four hundred bucks I need to get that done has been sucked dry by mini-emergencies left and right.

So she'll be drugged out for about two days after the surgery and she'll be zoned out with the meds they give her but hey.. if she's in very little/no pain, its all good.


As far as the bedless situation:

The mattress actually feels better on the floor.

I still want my bed though. That's another chunk of money we have to get in order to have it shipped from SoCal to NwWa. -sigh- But its a sound, comfortable, HUGE bed and I have no fear of breaking it to pieces. The bed would break me first before giving in.

[Bright_Star]

1st thing-get your cat fixed. That'll take care of the "Heat" problem. I have 2 female cats & both of them are fixed. They no longer roll around on the floor making "horny kitty" noises..lol.
2nd thing-go spend the night at a hotel with your hubby & do it all night until the wall paper starts peeling off the walls..lol.
Last thing-go buy a nice sized bed that won't fall apart when you two get "playfull"...lol.

[Saydrah]

Yup, all cats that are not being bred should be spayed- it will lengthen their lives by eliminating the risk of pyometra and drastically reducing the chance of several kinds of cancers and tumours. A spay/neuter surgery is among the greatest things and owner can do for a pet. After all, how awful would it be to have all your urges and hormones but never ever get laid your whole life?

Are you sure you've looked at every clinic in the area? I just got my MIL's dog neutered at a low cost clinic, and they did the anaesthesia very well- he was still unable to walk when I picked him up, so there's little me carrying a White Shepherd to the car by myself as he grumbles and snores- and they sent home a whole bottle of pain meds, which he only took two of because after two days he felt good as new. A couple people who have bad experiences (and that's bound to happen with the volume of pets low cost clinics see) can spread a rumor like that and really hurt the reputation of a good clinic.

I used to work for Yelp.com, and if you have a Yelp near you- Seattle should be a pretty lively Yelp community- posting a talk thread asking for a good local low cost vet clinic that can spay your cat and will provide pain meds and proper anaesthesia is bound to get some responses :)

*Note: Saydrah is a hypocrite to an extent here. I own a dog who is not yet neutered; however, there is significant scientific evidence that neutering a performance dog early impedes joint and muscle development to enough of an extent to make injury more likely, and as he is a future agility and flyball star and also 3/4 Corgi, a breed already prone to joint problems, we are holding off on neutering for about another month, until he is old enough to be fully physically developed. However, any animal not expected either to breed or to perform athletically at high levels should be speutered ASAP.

Sorry about the bed, by the way- but sounds like you are comfortable on the floor for now. Good luck getting some alone time with hubby!

[AnqeiicDemise]

I haven't gotten around to checking out the low cost clinics as we don't have that long of a time here in Seattle. (What a little over four months?)

Between moving, and moving, car getting repo'd and hubby losing job (wow.. the x3 rule's creeping me out. I'll explain later).. its been Demise-chan spending all possible free time at work making overtime to pay shit off.

I forget how early animals mature sexually. One minute she fit in the palm of my hand and the next she's shoving her genitals in my face.

I also have a hard time going to a human doctor I barely know. I'm even more overprotective of my animals. Taking her to a doctor/clinic that I am unsure of its practices makes me uncomfortable. I've worked with VCA and their doctors aren amazingly sweet/professional. (before I get asked, she's up to date on her shots.

Off topic.

Lets see bad x3s...

1) evicted
2) car repo'd
3) hubby's fired. ( all financially related)

Breakdowns:

1) hard drive cord went kaputz.
2)crock pot dies.
3) Gimpy Bed joins in the defunct goodness.

.... yay, over! -snort- yeah, right.

[Saydrah]

:roll: Well, good luck! You actually made me laugh out loud with the bit about shoving genitals in your face... ew! Except for rats and one duck, I have all male pets, but even the boys can embarrass you... my boy horse (gelded since a VERY young age, way before sexual maturity, so can't blame hormones) likes to wave his appendage around when he sees a carrot! Sheesh. The things we put up with to have pets, huh?

I hate seeing anyone but the doctor who has been my GP since I was eight, too- new docs creep me out- and I have been known to pay a call fee just for the chance to go in and really grill a new vet (politely, not SC like) so I sympathize. One other idea- maybe you could find a clinic that will let you observe the surgery if you promise not to vomit or pass out? My vet let me stay for my horse's knee surgery and take pictures, which made me a lot more comfortable- no way they would have let me in with a camera had they been planning to cut corners on anything! I ended up printing out the photo where one of the two vets who did the surgery is holding up the newly stitched up knee and giving a thumbs up and framing it for their office... they still have it. I also still have the bone chip from his knee.

That reminds me- I should post that link.