More clinic grumbling

[blas87]

*Warning: a wee bit of women's medical lingo, but I will keep it to a mininum*

I was to have a colposcopy today, which is a biopsy of the cervix. It's done after an abnormal Pap smear result. I am no stranger to this.

Unfortunately, because of my surgery last year, my cervical area is scarred, and my doctor didn't have the tools she needed to see the things she needed to see. So I have to go to the clinic in the city I live in. So, I have to have a different doctor.

I asked for a female doctor. I am not a raging sexist, but, like many women, I am petrified of the thought of a male OBGYN.

And as usual, setting up an appointment was like bartering in India.

I explained that I work 3rd shift and I need as early of an appointment as possible, and I cannot take a day off for it. Something between 8 am and 10 am is best.

What was I offered? 12:30, 1:15, 2:00, 3:00....apparently, all the women OBYNs at that clinic have no morning openings for the next month. Either that or the woman at the front desk was being ignorant and not listening.

She said "Sorry, but the only way you're going to get a woman doctor would be if you came in the afternoon."

I cannot afford to lose sleep with the hours that I work. I cannot turn around my sleep schedule. I cannot waste my paid vacation to take a day off JUST for a colposcopy, as they really aren't that painful and I have always been able to return to work right away after one.

So I had to swallow my pride, and accept an appointment with a male OBGYN.

Please guys, comforting thoughts. I don't want this to be a debate over males vs females, I just REALLY do NOT want a male doctor, but I do NOT want to waste the very little vacation time that I have saved up and I do NOT want to compromise my sleep schedule over it. Please assure me that I'll be alright and that I have no reason to be worried.

[I8DaCookie]

Please guys, comforting thoughts. I don't want this to be a debate over males vs females, I just REALLY do NOT want a male doctor, but I do NOT want to waste the very little vacation time that I have saved up and I do NOT want to compromise my sleep schedule over it. Please assure me that I'll be alright and that I have no reason to be worried.

I'm right with you when it comes to wanting to see a female doctor as opposed to a male one.

BUT

I have a friend who says that the best OB/GYN she ever had was a male and that she has yet to find anyone as good as him.

[Greenday]

GUYS RULE!

Anyway, I'll keep my fingers crossed that everything remains normal for yah!

[myswtghst]

I have a male OB/GYN, and he is amazing. I've often told my mom that I'd avoid moving too far away in the future, just because I'm not sure I could ever find another OB/GYN I'd be as happy with. He's seen me through an ongoing situation very similar (from what I've read) to what you're going through, and done a fantastic job of it.

Try to relax, remember that to him, it's a job, and I'll be hoping you get a male as good as mine is. If nothing else, focus on the procedure - I've had a few done, and I know they're not terribly enoyable, so maybe that can keep you distracted. ;)

[JuniorMintz]

And as usual, setting up an appointment was like bartering in India.

I explained that I work 3rd shift and I need as early of an appointment as possible, and I cannot take a day off for it. Something between 8 am and 10 am is best.

What was I offered? 12:30, 1:15, 2:00, 3:00....apparently, all the women OBYNs at that clinic have no morning openings for the next month. Either that or the woman at the front desk was being ignorant and not listening.

She said "Sorry, but the only way you're going to get a woman doctor would be if you came in the afternoon."

I don't mean to take too much attention off the main point of the story (your reluctance to see a male OB-GYN, which is totally understandable) but this section of your post jumped out at me personally.

I am the woman at the front desk, and I think it's really sad that there are people out there that think I'm ignorant and/or not paying attention to their needs. I have a master schedule for all of my doctors mapped out, and there is nothing I can do to override them.

EXAMPLE: The doctor we hired to see our Medi-Cal patients works on Thursday mornings only. I understand that there are many, MANY people who need an afternoon appointment- like, ALL of the school aged children for example. Unfortunately, I can't give what I don't have. Trust me, I would if I could, but I *can't*. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY someone gets upset with me about this, and I hate it. I hate that people think I'm being a jerk when I can't pull a better appointment out of my ass for them. If they think I don't care, they're wrong. My problem is that I do care, probably too much or I wouldn't even be posting this.

I don't know. Don't listen to me. It's been a bunch of really lousy days in a row and I'll be ok. My problems are minor and I'm sorry for the hijack. :ashamed:

PS Good luck at your appointment. Maybe he'll be awesome and you won't want to go back to your old doctor at all.

[iradney]

blas, my Pop's a doc - he's not an OBGYN (tho he wanted to study it) but an anaesthetist, and he says after you've seen your 20th pair of breasts or genitalia, you really couldn't care less about it. It's kinda like a mechanic for a car - they look at them as parts of the body, not "fun bits".
As long as your OBGYN is professional and puts you at ease and knows what he's doing, it shouldn't really matter whether he sits down or stands up to pee.

[ThePhoneGoddess]

I hear what you're saying, Junioirmintz, but I also, as a 3rd shift worker, have Blas' problems with scheduling. Do you tell people when they demand afternoon schedules for that doctor that he doesn't work afternoons? Because receptionists don't often tell us that. It is incredibly frustrating trying to get an appointment for something---anything---when you sleep all day. I don't understand why that doctor will only work thursday mornings---what the heck does he do the rest of the week?

[Amethyst Hunter]

*offers many :hug:s * I hope that things go well for you!

[JuniorMintz]

It's not uncommon for younger optometrists (read: within their first 5-10 years of practicing) to be working out of several different practices, 5 to 7 days a week depending on their own individual needs. Not only that, but most of them do quite a bit of commuting to boot. It's really rough for younger doctors, and I really don't envy them in that respect. (The lady that sees our Medi-Cal patients is currently working at 4 different practices, 6 days a week!)

I understand that those who work graveyards have a difficult schedule that needs accommodation. My sister works overnights as a 911 dispatcher, so even something simple like trying to meet for coffee can be a real bitch sometimes. Honestly, when a patient asks me a scheduling question, I just tell them straight up what I have available.

"Dr. Yoohoo sees patients on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, do you prefer morning or afternoon appointents? Morning? The soonest morning appointment I have available with your doctor is on Tuesday, Feb 5th at 11:30... oh, you need my earliest morning appointment? Your doctor sees his first patient at 9:30 and my next available 9:30 will take you out to Wednesday Feb 13th... that works for you? Ok, I'll go ahead and book that, may I have your blahblahblahblah..."

It works for me and is acceptable to most patients. I don't think I'd bother trying to hide scheduling info from patients, frankly. I don't see any advantage to doing so and it sounds like a real nuisance.

I mostly took issue with the section that I quoted earlier because I HATE that people think that just because I don't have what they need, I don't care about their plight. Honestly, when someone posts a story on CS where a customer flips out on a cashier because they don't have an item that the customer wants, the general response from the CS crowd is usually to empathize with the cashier. That same support is very rarely extended to those of us working in the front lines of the health care industry. I love so many aspects of my job, but honestly, people whine at me more now than they *ever* did when I worked at the mall.

Maybe some receptionists don't care at all. Others (like me), they probably cared when they punched in at 9 but come 2 or 3 PM, they've been bitched at by so many people that they become almost numb to it. I've found myself hitting that point a lot recently. But, what can you do...:shrug:

[Greenday]

I don't understand why that doctor will only work thursday mornings---what the heck does he do the rest of the week?

There are a lot of doctors that work in multiple offices throughout the week. When I had a tumor in my hand, I had to go to a hand specialist for it. Two days a week he was at the office I went to. Two days a week he was at another place to perform surgeries. The fifth day of the week he was at a third place.

But seriously, pick one place and stay there.

[crazylegs]

I just REALLY do NOT want a male doctor,

As a chap I can totally understand. If I needed to have 'the chaps' seen to (for whatever reason) I would insist on a male Dr. Its a difficult thing to explain and although yes each Dr has seen more bodies than a porn cameraman but to you its [I]your[/] body and its special to you.

[blas87]

I never meant to insinuate that everyone who works as a receptionist is ignorant and doesn't cater to anyone's needs, I just find it frustrating that ever since I've been on 3rd shift, it has been damn near like pulling teeth to get an early enough appointment. I try to be as polite as possible, and I do feel like an idiot after I've said "No, that's too late" five times and I can hear the receptionist sigh. I just cannot sacrifice sleep or waste a day of vacation just to have an afternoon appointment. If this procedure wasn't so important and didn't have to be done ASAP, I would have asked what they had open for early mornings for the next month or beyond.

It was never a problem getting appointments until I went to 3rd shift.

[myswtghst]

I work second shift (3p to midnight) and I despise having to get up early, but I can't take an appointment after 2p, so I often just explain to the receptionist when I call, flat out, these are the hours I can do. Often, explaining a specific window, not giving a whole lot of back story, and just being firm but polite seems to help. I do, however, completely understand your frustration, as it can be way more difficult than seems necessary to schedule any appointment under time constraints.

[BookstoreEscapee]

blas, I totally understand why you're more comfortable with a female doc, but really it won't be so bad. Like someone else said, as long as they are professional it shouldn't make much difference. He's probably done a ton of procedures and to him it's just a job. Keep in mind that in all likelihood, he will have a female nurse present as a chaperone of sorts, and on the off chance he doesn't, you can request that someone accompany you. (In this day and age it's just a matter of protection for both sides, aside from the fact that many women are just more comfortable with another woman present. My doc is male, and while I don't think anything would happen if it were just me and him, I still feel more comfortable with the nurse there.)

Just take deep breaths and it'll be over before you know it. :hug:

[blas87]

I'm not worried about a male doctor being a pervert or unprofessional, it's just always been my belief that why is he practicing medicine on women when he doesn't know what it's like or it feels like to be a woman? Maybe that sounded sexist, but it's just how I feel. When a woman doctor is treating me, at least I know she may have had it happen to her. She gets a menstrual period. She gets cramps. She's had Pap smears. Ya know?

Turns out I'm getting the same doctor who did all of my mother's procedures before her hysterectomy (she had endometriosis). She said he was a very nice guy and he made her feel very comfortable.

Yes, there will be a nurse as a "witness". There was one the last time I went through this, and yesterday as well, until we had to stop because they couldn't find what they needed. So I feel a little better.

[tacohuman]

I'm not worried about a male doctor being a pervert or unprofessional, it's just always been my belief that why is he practicing medicine on women when he doesn't know what it's like or it feels like to be a woman? Maybe that sounded sexist, but it's just how I feel. When a woman doctor is treating me, at least I know she may have had it happen to her. She gets a menstrual period. She gets cramps. She's had Pap smears. Ya know?


a friend of mine prefers her ob/gyn to be male for the same reasons, from a different perspective. she says it's been her experience that a male is more likely to take her complaints seriously because he hasn't experienced them, while when she saw female doctors they had a 'been there, done that' attitude, like if they could get through it without help, she shouldn't be complaining.

[monolayth]

I have found the male doctors to be more gental thatn the females.

[Mighty Girl]

I only go to female ob's - but I've had my share of crappy ones. One of them had her walls plastered with "Life...what a beautiful choice" posters- which is fine, but definitely gave me the impression that she might not be forthcoming with ALL info. and only that which coincided with her beliefs.

I refuse to go to a male ob because to me, that would be like going to a mechanic who's never driven a car, or owned a car.

On the other hand, my friend has a male ob and she says he's the greatest.

So, try not to worry. And remember, as a consenting adult, should you ever feel "odd", just end the appt. and see someone else. People forget that they're not a hostage in a dr's office. You really can leave anytime.

[FuzzyKitten99]

I was of the same mind when I first started going to the Gyn at 18. And it was easy enough to just keep requesting the same doctor (which you can do, BTW), until I was preggers with my first, and with my work schedule combined with my clinic's OB/Gyn's availablility, I had to kind of see whoever was available when I was. I could see who I wanted from a selection that had openings (no pun intended) for my monthly visits.

Two of the OB's were males, and at first it was weird. But after you get so many different people poking and prodding your nethers... it becomes easier, but no less sucky for each visit. (Oh, the wonderful time of being pregnant!)

When I was finally sent to be induced (due to pre-eclampsia), the OB on at the time was one of the males from my clinic. At least it wasn't anyone I hadn't met yet...

Believe me, having kids really throws your shyness out the window! With my 2nd one, it was like riding a bike (sans preeclampsia).

I do prefer female Gynos just by instinct, but if a male is the next one available for the time I need, so be it, I guess.