Brushing your teeth with foot fungus ointment

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Okay, so I had Pink Eye last week. I stumbled out of bed, staggered to the fridge where my antibiotic eye drops were, and proceeded to squirt some into both eyes before I realized that a bottle of pectic enzyme (used in vinting wine) was also in there.

Shit burns, lemee tell you. I guess fruit pectins will not be forming gelatin in my eyes anytime soon. :burneyes:

Told my buddy, who had come down with it, too (I think we had a carrier at our 12th Night party on the 5th.). He said he'd accidently brushed his teeth with foot ointment once.

Anyone have any embarassing stories they'd like to add?

[Caveat Emptor]

About a year ago, I was cleaning my bathroom. I switched cleansers to try and kill some mildew.

"Why are my lungs stinging?"

Oh, sh*t!!!! :eek:

Turned on the exhaust fan, brought in my fan from the bedroom, and stayed the f**k AWAY from that room for the next two hours!

[lordlundar]

Had this one last week.

I had finished doing some clean up at work and was leaning on a slide away door for the counter, which did as was intented and slid away.

Apparently it's a bad thing to use it for support.

I tried to regain my balance so it looked like I was completely blitzed when I fell. Everyone there was asking how drunk I was. The best part about it? I don't drink.

Get back up, lower my head and walk away in shame.:lol:

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I've swished a paintbrush around in my coffee before. Probably more than once.

[Greenday]

Um, I've added nearly 2 liters of water to some undiluted hydrochloric acid...

[Acolyte]

I drank my paint-water once. Turns out that, after painting several 40K minis in a black-and-grey urban camo scheme, paint water looks a lot like Pepsi.

[Lil Bunny]

I shouldn't laugh. I really shouldn't. However, I am and I am sorry.

I've done the beer bottle ashtray thing more times then I'd like to admit.

Dad always made the Burning Ring of fire joke. You know the one. It's what happens when you mix the ben gay up with the preparation H. *rimshot*

[Eireann]

A friend of my family's once brushed her teeth with Preparation H.

[wolfie]

Not a mix-up, so it's a bit off-topic, but a few years back I managed to cut myself while shaving - with an electric razor. The foil on the head was getting old, and the "link" between 2 of the holes broke. Since this was on the curved part of the foil, the end stuck out a bit, and that's what got me.

[Jade Panurple]

Funny to me, embarassing to my husband:

A couple of months back, we were working on some paper mache. Now, my husband just happens to be a milk fanatic. We had the glue mixture in a red plastic cup, and his milk was in, what else, a red plastic cup. He gulped down half of that glue at once before he even realized it wasn't milk, and spit what was in his mouth across the room! Of course, this made him a little queasy, and I couldn't stop laughing long enough to help him!

[DGoddessChardonnay]

A friend of my family's once brushed her teeth with Preparation H.

*snerk*

I had a stepbrother, who back when he was in middle school, accidentally ATE a couple or three Preperation H suppositories.

His explanation when Mom found out: he thought they were cheese pellets.

At least he didn't have to worry about having hemmoroids of the mouth.:lol:

[MystyGlyttyr]

Oh lord, queen of misjudgment here. I'm ungodly scatterbrained...either I forget to eat for a day or two, or I don't pay attention to what I'm eating, or what I've picked up, etc.

I have:

Popped what I thought was a peppermint into my mouth...it was an Alka-Seltzer.

Tried to drink a glass of water, ended up with a shot of hydrogen peroxide.

Picked up a red glass containing what I thought was water. Turned out to have cherry Kool-aid. (Not bad, but when you're expecting water, cherry is a surprise.)

Tried to brush my teeth with antibiotics.

Tried to brush my hair with an empty stick (the bristles had fallen out years before).

Tried to superglue a wound shut, coated it with ringworm medicine (BURN LIKE FIRE).

Started eating a can of cat food instead of a can of tuna (though admittedly, I like the taste of cat food anyway, pica pica. :D )

Tried to start a fire with an empty box of matches (especially considering I had opened the box and stared into it while walking over to the fireplace).

Superglued the heels of my boots back onto the shoes in an enclosed bathroom less than about 60 square feet.

Etc., so forth, so on.

My mom has the record in our house, though. She once tried to take her blood pressure medicine (little blue pills in individual foil wrapping), and wound up taking two of my dad's Viagra.

Cured her headache, though. :lol:

[ImadeYouACookie]

Hahahahha great stories :)

I think my two worst are:

I once had to spray paint a small chest of drawers white. I thought it would be easier to spray paint than to do it with normal paint and a brush. It was much easier, however, I didn't think about taking my work outside. The result.. Sofa, speakers and TV looking a wee bit gray and dusty.. Could not be cleaned :S But we did get a new sofa and TV :D

I once was visiting a friend of mine. We was just hanging out, and I spotted a roll-on lipgloss of hers. I put it on, and thought it had quite a weird taste to it. She sees it and tells me that its not a lipgloss. It is a zip/pimple remover :doh:

[RecoveringKinkoid]

When my Dad was a teenager, he had a paper route. It was raining, and he put a couple envelopes of Polygrip into his boots thinking they were foot powder.

He could not get the boots off. His mom had to drag them off his feet, with him hanging onto the toilet for dear life. Long ropes of Polygrip hung out of the boots. He said it looked like pumpkin guts. He hadnt' a clue, but she did, and it took her a while to stop laughing long enough to tell him what he'd done. :roll:

[Misanthropical]

I bought what I thought was body wash. When I went to take a shower I couldn't figure out why it wasn't lathering up.

I look at the bottle and it's lotion, not a wash at all!

[Amethyst Hunter]

I never get tired of telling this story... :lol:

I wear glasses and can't see squat without 'em - I would literally have to get nose-to-nose, in your face in order to be able to see someone clearly.

Years ago I used to have this purple rabbit's-foot keychain that I kept on top of my dresser. At the time I had a pair of cats, Charlie and Bubba, who loved to get a hold of that thing and kick it around, as cats do. So...

One night I woke up to the sounds of scuffling on my bedroom floor. As anyone who's ever had a cat knows, you can always tell the sounds of when they've gotten into something they shouldn't be into. So, my first thought was that one of them had jumped up on the dresser and knocked the rabbit's-foot keychain down to play with it.

The only light source I had was the faint glow of the bathroom nightlight down the hall. Stumbling around, I located my furry friends and shooed them away from the keychain, and picked it up...

In that dim glow I was trying, in my half-awake state, to ascertain whether or not any damage had been done to the keychain. I brought the object closer to my face, and closer...

...and that's right about the time when I suddenly realized: "waaaaaiiiit a minute...this is too *soft* to be a rabbit's-foot keychain...!!"

I flicked on the light switch, and there in my hand, less than 6 inches away from my face, was..........

A DEAD MOUSE. :eek:

I'm still amazed I didn't wake up anybody else in the house with my yell of disgust. :lol:

[Binky]

hmmm

I decided to make crumbed chicken. I got what I THOUGHT to be flour out of my cupboard, then proceeded to coat the chicken in the "flour". I couldn't work out why the flour was disappearing.

Crumbed the chicken then baked it. While I was eating it, I realized it had this really odd sweat taste.

Turns out I have used caster sugar instead. My bad :rolleyes:

I've gone to drink glue by accident (my coffee was next to it). I've also accidentally picked up the water I was cleaning my brushes in and taken a sip...not nice stuff