"I wish!" (also known as: be careful what you wish for...)

[Saydrah]

The other two games I started are pretty popular, so let's try this one:

I'll post a wish. The person below me gets to grant it and tell me HOW they granted it. Then they make a wish. Like so:

Gravekeeper: "I wish 867 would never call again."

BeckySunshine: "Granted. Now they will all come to your call center in person, rather than calling!"


I'll start!

I wish that I could get a full night's sleep on a weeknight for once!

[Nekojin]

I wish that I could get a full night's sleep on a weeknight for once!

Granted. And since your personality will change noticeably from getting enough sleep, your workplace will fire you for suspicion of being under the influence of something. Of course, that means that you'll then have all the time you need for sleeping, so granted twice!

I wish I could get a job that I'd enjoy doing.

[Saydrah]

Granted! You are now a professional combination chocolate tester, beer drinker, video-game reviewer, cruise taker, and puppy cuddler. Unfortunately, doing all this 8 hours a day causes you to become so bored with all of the above that you now in your spare time go to area retail stores and help the customers.

I wish I'd get a promotion!

[monolayth]

Granted,

Of corse it has been a promotion to taking all graver keepers 867 calls

I wish I won the lottery.

[Lace Neil Singer]

You do... but you lost the ticket! Oh horrors! O.o

I wish the weather would be sunny again.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But you will get such a blistering sunburn that your skin will fall off.

I wish I had a puppy.

[AnaKhouri]

Granted! But his name is Cujo. :devil:

I wish my husband didn't have to kill mice for his job.

[Chazzie]

Granted! However, now you need to worry about his new job, killing ROUSes.

I wish I didn't have so much English work to catch up on.

[Caveat Emptor]

Granted! However, now you need to worry about his new job, killing ROUSes.

I wish I didn't have so much English work to catch up on.

Granted! However you now have Esperanto homework!

I wish the government would hurry up and give me a start date for my new job.

[Chanlin]

Granted, the start date is 12/31/3000

I wish I had decided to go to college earlier :)

[Aethian]

Granted but your degree is now out of date and you must go again.

I wish I had ran my husky pack in more races.

[Andara Bledin]

Granted. However, due to the exposure to the elements and the harsh nature of the races, you are now nicknamed, "Three Finger Aethian."

I wish I looked better in a swimsuit.

^-.-^

[RetailWorkhorse]

Granted but now you can't speak because of laryngitis caused by the coughing.

I wish my checking account was full.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted! But now you can't stop sneezing.

I wish I had gone to sleep a half hour ago.

I also wish Retail Workhorse hadn't gazumped me. :p

[Amethyst Hunter]

*waves magic wand* Done.

However, now you are stalked 24/7 by paparazzi taking every possible picture of you that they can (most of them from unflattering angles) and tabloids screaming about how hideously overweight and flabby you are...even though you now have a figure that 99% of swimsuit-wearing women would literally kill for.

I wish my allergies would go away.

[AnaKhouri]

Granted, but they've been replaced by a cold.

I wish my cat didn't shed so much!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted! But now you shed even more.

I wish it was the weekend.

[Becks]

Granted, but your work week is now 8 days long.

I wish I had chocolate milk.

[marty]

Granted, but the chocolate milk has gone bad.

I wish I had something to do tonight.

[iviles]

granted but its covering someones shift

I wish my landlords wernt such dickwads!

[flicksgirl]

Granted, but now your living in a box under an over pass.

I wish I could travel more.

[purplecat41877]

Granted, and now you have a lifetime pass to travel wherever and whenever you please.:)

I wish a manners class was required for getting a driver's license.:yes:

[Saydrah]

Granted, but unfortunately so many people failed that the government has now decided nobody gets a driver's license because the costs of retesting over and over were so high. All private vehicles are replaced by light rail and the subway.


I wish that it was possible to call someone on being a misogynist without getting called a feminazi.

[powerboy]

Granted

You will go too the movies. And since you went to the movies, you will make everyone think that you are crazy & all because you wont be quit about it:lol:


I wish that I had unlimited wishes:wave:

[Saydrah]

Granted, but they all have to be made and granted in the manner of this thread, so none turn out QUITE like you planned.


I wish I'd go to bed and stop screwing around online instead of sleeping!

[Evil Queen]

Granted, but now you're dreaming that you're on teh internet.

I wish I was taller.

[blas]

Granted! But now you're 6'9 and can't find a guy anywhere near your height....

I wish I had a car again.

[Caveat Emptor]

Granted! But now you're 6'9 and can't find a guy anywhere near your height....

I wish I had a car again.

Granted. It's called an "Edsel."

I wish I had a million dollars.

[iradney]

Granted
But they're Zimbabwean dollars

I wish chocolate didn't taste so good

[draggar]

I wish chocolate didn't taste so good

Granted! But now your taste buds are so messed up *everything* tastes bad!

I wish my clients all didn't wait until Friday afternoon to see me!

[Emrld]

Granted - they now all show up 3 min till close Mon - Thur and you have to solve all problems before leaving for the day.


I wish I was happier

[Saydrah]

Granted. You're now the Joker. Whyyyy so seeeeerious?


I wish that I was more awake!

[MystyGlyttyr]

Granted...but now you're an insomniac!

I wish being a pro wrestler could be considered a noble profession.

[Emrld]

Granted . . .but now everyone is hit over the head with a metal folding chair when pulled over for speeding


I wish: my bosses would practice what the preach

[Saydrah]

Granted. Your boss now preaches laziness and asshattery to anyone who will listen.


I wish they would raise the age limit for racehorses so they have to be at least 5 to race.

[monolayth]

Granted.

Now they have chenged the calendar so that 5 new years = 1 old year.


I wish I Knew what to do with certin males in my life.

[Saydrah]

Granted, but it's going to be really expensive to rent a :chipper:


I wish the ants would get out of my house!

[Emrld]

Granted - but feeding all the Uncles who have shown up to spray is expensive

(Yes, I had to go there)


I wish I wasn't hooked on this thread

[blas]

Granted! But now you're stuck in General Work Chat.

I wish my mom would stop yelling at me.

[Saydrah]

Granted. She will now walk up behind you at random times, tap you on the shoulder, and curse you out in sign language.


I wish that I would focus and get some work done.

[CorDarei]

Granted, but the work you finished is followed by 10 times the amount of work you just finished.


I wish i didn't hafta wake up before 8am every weekday.

[blas]

Granted! Now you work 3rd shift with me and will never sleep like a normal person again.

I wish someone would clean up the huge antifreeze and oil spill that's still in my parking spot before the landlord sees it.

[Saydrah]

Granted. Tommy Lee comes and cleans it SO well the landlord begs him to stay and live there forever!


I wish my roommate would clean the bathroom and kitchen and mow the lawn like I've been nagging him to do all week.

[Crazeyal]

Granted...

But now they are on disability for running over their own toes with the lawnmower, and they've filed suit claiming it was ALL YOUR FAULT!! The Judge is happy to let you off with a warning... As long as you cater to their every need while awaiting toenail transplants!


I wish I had a reliable work vehicle...

[Chanlin]

Granted, but it reliably gets 1 mile to the gallon. Have fun with gas :)

I wish I could actually focus on creative writing for once and actually finish a book that I start working on.

[Saydrah]

Granted. But you'll be needing to build a barn in your backyard and purchase some hay.


I wish my landlady will be thrilled at the condition of my rental house when she visits me tomorrow, and not make any rude comments about the rats (which of course she knows are there)

[Crazeyal]

Granted.. But now you have a new roomate!!

Iwish I had the time, money and workshop to create movie-level costumes.

Granted, but it reliably gets 1 mile to the gallon. Have

fun with gas :)

Ah.. But that's what company gas cards are for!! BOOYAH!

[crazylegs]

Granted.. But now you have a new roomate!!

Iwish I had the time, money and workshop to create movie-level costumes.

Ah.. But that's what company gas cards are for!! BOOYAH!

Granted but the movie business collapses leaving no way for you to sell your wares

I wish I could dance!

[Saydrah]

Granted! You now have a rare neurological condition and can't STOP dancing.


I wish I had a salad.

[crazylegs]

Granted, but you've just found half a slug whilst eating your lettuce.

I wish for ESP!

[Saydrah]

Granted. You now own an Extraordinarily Silly Penguin.


I wish this lady would call me back already!

[crazylegs]

Granted. You now own an Extraordinarily Silly Penguin.


I wish this lady would call me back already!

Granted, but she's the worst, suckiest entitlement whore you're ever going to meet.

I wish for an unusual talent

[LewisLegion]

Granted! You are now able to grow hair on random areas of your body.

I wish all of your wishes come true!

[draggar]

Granted but now we're all dead since someone had wished us all dead at least once.

I wish I had more Chinese food! (THis is fun, BTW)

[Crazeyal]

Granted!! But now you also have 50 illegal in-laws to go with your live-in cook!


I wish I could line up every person who's ever wronged me and force them to listen to bad Kareoke for eternity!!

Granted but the movie business collapses leaving no way for you to sell your wares
Sell?!?! I'M GOIN TA DRAGONCON!!! BOOYAH SQUARED!!!

[draggar]

I wish I could line up every person who's ever wronged me and force them to listen to bad Kareoke for eternity!!

Granted, but you have to listen to it *and* them complaining about it for all of eternity!

I wish my Finish Spitz (dog) wasn't afraid of everything.

[Saydrah]

Granted. He gave his fears to your German Shepherds and is now brave as can be, while they quake in the corner!


I wish I had one of Kiri's future puppies ;)

[Crazeyal]

Granted!! But Kiri's water broke while cuddling with you!!

I wish I had Abs of steel!

[MystyGlyttyr]

Granted. Unfortunately, it's the same way my brother gained them...four hernia surgeries!

I wish for world peace.

Edit: Crap, this thread moves fast!

[LewisLegion]

Granted, but its because the human race has gone extinct.

I wish I were anywhere else but work.

[crazylegs]

Granted, but you're at work replacing Gravekeeper!

I wish for the ability to know every prime number

[Evil Queen]

Granted, but now you can't do simple math.

I wish I didn't come to work today. :cry:

[Nekojin]

Granted. You overslept, and were fired.

I wish I could be fit and trim without having to do any exercise or special dieting.

[draggar]

Granted, but now you're just a skeleton, no skin or organs.

I wish I got a payraise!

[Saydrah]

Granted! But you now work mandatory overtime every day.


I wish that my secondary SO had a cell phone so I could call him to say hi while he's out of town. I miss him!

[Nekojin]

Granted. You'll now find out the hard way that he's cheating on you with your best friend, by overhearing one of his voice-mails.

I wish for world peace.

[draggar]

Granted but again, humans are now extinct.

I wish I lived in a nicer home in a nicer neighborhood.

[Saydrah]

Granted. You'll now find out the hard way that he's cheating on you with your best friend, by overhearing one of his voice-mails.


;) Not so bad as it sounds. My best friend is my primary SO, and male, and if we're counting only non-SO friends, my other best friend is also male and is gay. So being bi+poly myself, I'd be thrilled to find out that so is secondary SO!


Draggar, your wish is granted. Unfortunately two months after you move in, they build a chemical processing plant next door.



I wish that I had a better fitting saddle for my pony or money to buy a better fitting saddle.

[draggar]

I wish that I had a better fitting saddle for my pony or money to buy a better fitting saddle.

Granted! But now you have a mini-horse.

I wish gas was less expensive.

[monolayth]

Granted, but now all vehicles are obsolete....we have flying horses now.

I wish I actualy granted that wish.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! NOW GET IN THE BOTTLE!!!

I wish I could fly!

[Evil Queen]

Granted but now you have airplane wings of steel and can't get through airport security.

I wish I had a soda.

[monolayth]

Granted, but it also shipped itself to the north pole.


I wish my hair would do itself tommrrow.

[Evil Queen]

Granted but now it's some bizarre colour and you're afraid to leave the house.

I wish I packed a lunch...

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Granted, but your lunch bag contains haggis.

I wish Numbnuts got fired

[monolayth]

Granted, but now you have a new stalker with lots of time on his hands.

I wish I went so tired.

[Caveat Emptor]

Granted, but now you're wide awake at 3AM, bouncing off the walls

I wish for this workday to end.

[monolayth]

Granted, unfortnuatly you will noever have a workday again, you lost your job.

I wish I will be up at 3 doing somthing fun.

[Evil Queen]

Granted, but it's less fun for you and more fun for me. :D

I wish BF cooked dinner.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Granted, but he's serving up Fugu and he didn't remove all the poison parts.

I wish I were on vacation already.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Granted! But you're on the beach during Monsoon season.

I wish I had a motorcycle.

[Evil Queen]

Granted, but he's serving up Fugu and he didn't remove all the poison parts. Blech... I wanna change my wish.

I wish I were on vacation already.

Granted but you get sick so you're stuck at home the whole time.

I wish I didn't have this headache.

EDIT: LUCKY NUMBER! POST 666!

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Granted but you get sick so you're stuck at home the whole time.



As long as I have CS and an ample supply of tasty beverages, it still beats work!



I wish I didn't have this headache.

Granted, but now you've developed a stomachache somehow.

I wish I were an Oscar Meyer Wiener....

[Evil Queen]

I wish I had a motorcycle. Granted but your insurance is sky high.

I wish I were an Oscar Meyer Wiener....

Congrats. You're a hotdog and some 4 year old is about to eat you covered in mustard! :p

I wish my co-irker will be on time today. Or early, so I can go home.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted, but now you live upstairs from your job.

I wish I didn't have to go to a wedding tomorrow.

[Aethian]

Granted but it's now a funeral.... (sorry only thing I could think of)

I wish this dimension had the real Doctor Who.

[Nekojin]

I wish this dimension had the real Doctor Who.

Granted. The Daleks are on their way to invade Earth as we type, and The Doctor is... well, lost somewhere else.

I wish I could have all of the comic-book super powers I've ever seen.

[MystyGlyttyr]

Granted. But, with great power comes great responsibility. Good luck with Galactus!

I wish I could think of a wish that couldn't be warped!

[Chanlin]

Granted but you have lost the ability to communicate in any way and therefore are unable to utter, write or otherwise make the wish.

I wish I never had to work again.

[powerboy]

Granted, but they all have to be made and granted in the manner of this thread, so none turn out QUITE like you planned.

Damn:(:cry:


---------------------------------------------

Granted, but now you a couch. But not just any one could sit on you. Just SC's that have not taken a bath in a couple of years


I wish for my unlimited wishes to turn out how I planned them:D

[draggar]

I wish for my unlimited wishes to turn out how I planned them:D

Granted now just remember to never say "I wish" before anything again. :)

I wish my dog didn't wake me up at 4am to go out. :(

[powerboy]

Granted now just remember to never say "I wish" before anything again. :)

I wish my dog didn't wake me up at 4am to go out. :(

Granted, but he woke you up at 3:06am to go out.

Since I cannot say I wish anymore. I think of making the wishes instead.

I wish that I can have $3 million

[draggar]

Granted! But it is $3M in Monopoly money!

I wish my clients didn't bug me over the weekend.

[Plaidman]

Granted, but now they'll bug you 24 hours mon-fri.


I wish to have a real girlfriend !

[draggar]

Granted! But your inflator is broken. :D

I wish I was on vacation.

[crazylegs]

Granted, but its Dudley.

I wish I was able to talk fluently in every known language in the world.

[draggar]

Granted but you don't know any of the local dialects so you sound like an idiot when you talk. :)

I wish I had a brand new, top of the line, PC.

[crazylegs]

Granted but you don't know any of the local dialects so you sound like an idiot when you talk. :)

I wish I had a brand new, top of the line, PC.

Granted but its so advanced the NSA impounds it and you can't use it for ten years! :D

I wish I wasn't an extrodinarily Silly Penguin

[Chanlin]

Granted now you are an Extraordinarily Silly Platypus (sorry wish rules state we can't override your other wishes, so you must still have the ESP you wished for :p )

I wish SC's would learn to read.

[Xieg]

Granted, but did you think that would change anything?

I wish I had the forethought to have a wish ready.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Granted! However you forgot what your wish was, and even thought you wrote it down you forgot where you put it.




I wish I had a sammich.

[Xieg]

Granted, however it was from the back of the fridge from aeons long past, and now it is looking at you funny.

I wish more of my customers spoke English.

[Evil Queen]

Granted but now you don't.

I wish It was Tuesday.

[crazylegs]

Granted but now you don't.

I wish It was Tuesday.

Granted but its the year 1753

I wish I was The Dr. :D

[iradney]

Granted, but now everyone expects free medical advice from you ALL THE TIME.

I wish I wasn't sunburnt :(

[draggar]

Granted! Now you're frostbitten! :D

I wish my other bank allowed me to do online banking. :(

[iradney]

Granted! But they charge you an arm and a leg for the service.

I wish chocolate didn't taste so good :(

[crazylegs]

Granted! But they charge you an arm and a leg for the service.

I wish chocolate didn't taste so good :(

Granted but now you're *really* addicted! :devil:

I wish I had X ray vision

[Evil Queen]

Granted but now you can't drive and you can't see the goods because all you see are skeletons.

I wish it was 9pm, not 4:30.

[worddork]

Granted. You are stuck in a time loop and have to live that one hour over and over again. Groundhog's Day style


I wish people could pronounce my last name correctly.

[Evil Queen]

Granted, your last name is now Smith.
(PS I have a difficult last name too, how do you spell yours and I might be able to pronounce it)

I wish I had more money.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Granted. You are stuck in a time loop and have to live that one hour over and over again. Groundhog's Day style


I wish people could pronounce my last name correctly.

Granted. Now they pronounce your first name incorrectly, even if it's a ridiculously easy one to pronounce.

I wish for a trouble-free inventory next week.

[karath]

Granted. I would, however, watch my back for the rest of the week if I were you.

I wish finals were over!

[Andara Bledin]

I wish finals were over!

Granted! Unfortunately, you didn't actually attend any of them, as you slipped into a mini-coma and the school won't let you re-take them.

I wish that I owned my own house.

^-.-^

[draggar]

Granted! Now you have a mortgage you can't afford, no equity, and a leaky roof that the insurance won't cover. :)

I wish I was in bed, asleep.

[Primer]

I wish I was in bed, asleep.
Granted, but it's the ocean bed, and you're sleeping with the fishes.

I wish we could afford to go to the Gettysburg reenactment this July 4.

[Becks]

Granted, but it's in Gettysburg, SD.

I wish I could lose weight.

[Saydrah]

Granted, but you will gain it all back next week and lose it again the week after, and so on and so forth.


I wish that I had a well-paying freelance job for extra income.

[purplecat41877]

Granted and now you own your very own company.:D

I wish I had a better sense of smell.:(

[BookstoreEscapee]

I wish that I had a well-paying freelance job for extra income.
Granted...but your job is the original "freelance"...as in...knight for hire.


(edit: damn, quick reply isn't quick enough!)


I wish I had a better sense of smell

Granted, but now you have a stuffy nose.


I wish I had a furry friend to cuddle right now.

[Pedersen]

Granted. Say hello to Sasquatch for me!

I wish my computers would stop crashing on me!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. Now it just up and runs away.


Huh, I was expecting someone to say my furry friend was Raps :p


I wish I could have some sort of shower/bed contraption so I could wake up all clean and shiny.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Granted! An IKEA Hacker took the Sonic Showers from the Starship Voyager and turned it into a bed for you! However she forgot to add in the plug so it doesn't work. Looks good, though.


I wish I wasn't freezing.

[Becks]

Granted. You're now melting into a sweat puddle.

I wish I could have some pizza.

[Chanlin]

(too easy) Granted, you could have some pizza. Just not right now.

I wish I knew everything there was to know in the world. (have fun guys :p )

[Crazeyal]

Granted. Too bad the brain hemorage made you forget..

I wish I could have breakfst in bed!!

[draggar]

Granted! But the cat wanted to share and spilled it all over the bed. The coffee, the maple syrup, the butter.

Guess who has to clean it up?

I wish I didn't have to clean out my air conditioning filter every 2 weeks.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! It's broken!! (boy that was easy..)


I wish I could trick my nephew inot cleaning the pool for free.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Granted! It's broken!! (boy that was easy..)


I wish I could trick my nephew inot cleaning the pool for free.

Granted! But he cleaned it soooooooooooooooo well there's no longer any water in it, no will any kind of water (or anything else for that matter) stay in the pool for more than 5 seconds.

And then it's dirty again.


I wish EQ would let me have a chicken for fresh eggs.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But you have developed an allergy to eggs.

I wish to lose 30 pounds while I sleep tonight.

[iradney]

Granted

But now you have no bones

I wish I remembered to buy tea today

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted but now you only like coffee.

I wish my kitties would snuggle with me. Brats. :(

[iradney]

Granted

but now they've taken over the bed

I wish I could stop sneezing (bloody plant bukkake!)

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted, but that tickly feeling in your nose right before you sneeze won't go away.

I wish my headache would go away.

[Nekojin]

I wish my headache would go away.

Granted - now your back hurts, making it difficult to do much of anything.

I wish to have a long, healthy, comfortable, and fulfilled life.

[Saydrah]

Granted. You will- your NEXT life, where you're reincarnated as a happy, healthy, long-lived sheep.


I wish that these ants would LEAVE!

[iradney]

Granted

But they're replaced by Giant Amazonian Millipedes!!

I wish I could go to bed early....

[crazylegs]

You now work the night shift, so 08:00 is your bed time...

I wish to be invincible!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted, but now nothing wants to harm you anyway...

I wish my feet weren't cold.

[Trayol]

Granted. Here is a nice bonfire for you, nevermind that it's in your home.

I wish I had more time to read.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But the only thing there is to read are PFB letters, badly written in all caps.

I wish I could teleport home.

[Princess-Snake]

Granted. But you weren't specific on which home, so hope you like the pharoh's pyramids of Egypt!

I wish I had a big plate of buffalo wings right now.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted, but they came from actual buffalos...

I wish my heel didn't hurt.

[Trayol]

Granted. Thank you for donating your foot to science.

I wish I had the ability to do a backflip

[worddork]

Granted. It's now your only means of transportation.

I wish my hair would stop falling out.

[monolayth]

Granted, But you did not complete anything.

I wish I could really kill things with my mind.

[worddork]

Granted. However, it now happens with every thought, so you are froced to have a lobotomy.

I wish I would stop walking into things and injuring my right hand.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. Now you keep injuring your left hand.

I wish I was still in the midst of the nap I took earlier on my parents' couch.

[worddork]

Granted. Now you keep injuring your left hand.

Been there done that.

Granted. However you stay asleep for 100 years and awake to a world where lizards rule and humans are used as cheap labor.

I wish people understood why I charge as much as I do for the jewerly I make.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Granted! But now instead they want free lessons on how to make their own jewelry, thus putting you out of business (they also take all the good beads and findings before you can get to them).


I wish I had a cookie.

[Trayol]

Granted. But I wouldn't eat it, if I were you. Trust me...

I wish I had the ability to read minds.

[worddork]

Granted. but now everyone around starts to think of "The Song That Nevr Ends" when they see you.

I wish my fish tank would clean itself.

[purplecat41877]

Granted, and now the tank looks brand new.:D

I wish more members would participate in my "Two Different Ways" (http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=25435) thread.:popcorn:

[Fenrus]

Granted, though the members adding in are spamming the site again...

I wish I had muscle tone.

[karath]

Granted. You are now the Abomination. My condolences ;)

I wish I would have no sleep problems for the rest of the week.

[Fenrus]

Granted, you'll not sleep for a week. Hey, if you don't actually sleep, you won't have problems sleeping.

I wish I was finally finished moving!

[crazylegs]

Granted, you'll not sleep for a week. Hey, if you don't actually sleep, you won't have problems sleeping.

I wish I was finally finished moving!

Granted, but know you can no longer physically move

I wish for unlimited knowledge

[wolfie]

I wish for unlimited knowledge

Granted, but you are never able to act on it in time, so you sit by helplessly as everything goes wrong in the manner you knew it would.

I wish my dispatcher would understand hours of service requirements and act accordingly - i.e. someone coming off a reset gets a long run, and someone coming off their third regional run of the week gets time off.

[Shangri-laschild]

Granted, but they quit right after they get the hang of it and you have to start over again with someone new who doesn't get it.

I wish I hadn't been stuck at the elementry school till 1230 last night.

[Plaidman]

Granted, but you would had to stay til 12:30 today.

I wish that Dark Knight was released today.

[Trayol]

Granted. However, it has been deemed inappropriate for all ages and given a rating of NC-65.

I wish gas would be cheaper.

[Becks]

Granted, but your car won't start.

I wish I had a kitten.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! and the Begal cub is SOOO cute.. for now..

I wish my dog was as self-washing as she THINKS she is..

[InverseHellion]

Granted! Now she's eternally a wet, clean dog. Enjoy the smell.

I wish I were a werewolf ala White Wolf's Apocalypse system.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! Unfortunatly WW had a change of heart.. you have to spend $60 to find out if you exist anymore.. YOU DO!! No you don't.. YOU DO!! oops.. you are now a purple-died puppy of aggression.. darn protestors..

I wish I could publish a series of wildly successful novels based on my roleplaying characters.

[Apathy]

Granted. But now you're recognized on the street by legions of demented fans.

I wish I had telekinesis.

[ArcticChicken]

Granted, unfortunately it costs four times as much effort as it would be to lift the object by hand.

I wish I could finish writing a story for once, instead of just getting great ideas that I never finish.

[karath]

Granted, unfortunately it costs four times as much effort as it would be to lift the object by hand.

I wish I could finish writing a story for once, instead of just getting great ideas that I never finish.

Well played.

Welcome to my world; but granted! But now you cannot stop writing for any reason, so it's a short-lived success.

I wish that comic my cousin and I have been planning since high school would actually exist!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted, but someone else wrote it.

I wish I had a star to wish on.

[worddork]

Granted, just don't touch it, being a gaint gas ball and everything.

I wish I could stick to one book and not try reading 3 to 4 at a time.

[Chanlin]

Granted, but now its the only book you're capable of reading.

I wish I had my own place to live.

[Xieg]

Granted. Hope you like roaches and dog sized rats.

I wish I had kept my resume up to date.

[Apathy]

Granted. Too bad the economy is down the tubes and there aren't any jobs send your resume to.

I wish I had a neverending supply of Cheez-its.

[Chanlin]

Granted, but your buried in them now and can't move or breathe and it won't be long before... well at least you went happy.

I wish I could read lips.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted, but now everyone talks with their back to you.

I wish I could concentrate enough to read even one book...in less than 2 weeks...:(

[Apathy]

Granted, but your buried in them now and can't move or breathe and it won't be long before... well at least you went happy.


Yay!


I wish I could concentrate enough to read even one book...in less than 2 weeks...:(

Granted. But all you can get your hands on are romance novels.

I wish I had a castle.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But all you can get your hands on are romance novels.

I wish I had a castle.

I'd rather not read.


Granted, but you have to share it with the characters from all those romance novels I'm stuck reading...

Dammit!

I wish I didn't have to read romance novels. :p

(Thanks, Bagga :o)

[Bagga]

I will take BookstoreEscapee's post as impliying that she said "I wish I didn't have to read Romance novels"

Granted, but now you are being followed by an obsessive person who insists on reading Romance novels TO you, using different but wholly inappropriate voices for each character in the dialogue passages.

I wish my Chinese students of English could actually speak English.

[AnaKhouri]

Granted, but now you are out of a job. :(

I wish a damn agent would just accept my novel already!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted, but it's Old English...

I wish I could think of a wish.

[ArcticChicken]

Granted! Now, you can think of all the wishes and are paralyzed with indecision.

I wish I had a Moon Fortress.

[Becks]

Granted, but it's on one of Saturn's moons.

I wish I could sleep later than 8 am.

[Fenrus]

granted, but you're now out of a job from sleeping in.


I wish for a pony! (that's right, I don't need a vagina, I have a pony!)

[draggar]

granted, but you're now out of a job from sleeping in.


I wish for a pony! (that's right, I don't need a vagina, I have a pony!)


Granted, your My Little Pony toy will bein next week.

I wish this "unknown caller" would either stop calling me or leave a message if it is important.

[iradney]

Granted - but now they're knocking at your door! :eek:

I wish I hadn't burnt my fingers while baking cookies :(

[draggar]

Granted - but now they're knocking at your door! :eek:

I wish I hadn't burnt my fingers while baking cookies :(

Granted! Now the cookies are burned to a crisp. :)

I wish the @$$hole who loves to drive by my house 100 time a day with his stereo blasting would stop it and never come here again.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But he left behind the stereo on his last pass by.

I wish my wrist wasn't hurting me today.

[Apathy]

Granted. But now your knees are.

I wish I had a job that didn't involve dealing with people at all.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Eh, my knees hurt too, on the stairs...:(

Granted. Now your job is with rabid wolverines.

I wish my windshield didn't have a crack in it (got hit by a rock on the way to work yesterday).

[karath]

Granted. Now you have no windshield, period.

I wish my essay would write itself.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But it plagiarized from the teacher's favorite author.

I wish someone would bring me a cup of tea.

[worddork]

Granted, but their dull.

I wish the weather would make up its freaking mind. (near 100f yesterday, 78f today)

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. It's 22 degrees and snowing for the rest of the year.

I wish my friend would go back to Seattle and take the rain with him!
(Not really, I just want the rain to go; he can stay.)

[worddork]

Granted, you now live in a dry arid desert.

I wish my short term memory was longer that a gold fish's.

yeah that's righ I suffer from C.R.S (can't remember s**t)

[Crazeyal]

Granted! You have photographic memory.
Too bad you are rooming with the three hundred.. pounders..

I wish I could star in my own Superhero movie.

[worddork]

Granted, however you are the villain's lackey.

I wish I could sleep without tossing and truning so much that I end up in odd, painfull positions.

[Becks]

Granted, but now you can only sleep chained upright against a wall.

I wish I could make up my mind.

[draggar]

Granted! But the lipstick clashes with your hair. :D

I wish I had today off (and wasn't fired for it)

[InverseHellion]

Granted! Your workplace burned down last night and while you're not fired you won't be working for a while.

I wish I'd remembered to go grocery shopping

[Meadhands]

I wish I'd remembered to go grocery shopping

Granted.

However, the gas station will not accept bills above a 20 for your $200 of groceries.

I wish I was with a friend right now.

[Apathy]

Granted. Too bad he/she's not your friend.

I wish I was done fact checking this horribly long list.

[crazylegs]

Granted, but now its one post longer

I wish I had a cat.

[Meadhands]

I wish I had a cat.

Granted. Enjoy your new werecat. You will see her upon the next full moon. Lock your doors.

I wish I didn't just see an old school mate and forget her name (like, 10 minutes ago!)

[Chanlin]

Granted, you will never again see a school mate and forget their name because you will never again see any of your school mates, even the ones you liked.

I wish the idiot in my sign language class that sits next to me would get it through his thick skull that the instructor is singling him out because hes the one that have the most trouble with learning the language. (he asked me if I notice that she seems to single him out a lot).

[Aethian]

Granted, but now all the tap shoes in the world are too small for your feet...

I wish my guy was already living with me and not stuck down under...

[draggar]

Granted, now you wish he was back down under. :)

I wish my puppy didn't chase the cats.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! but now the Mountain lion chases him!


I wish I could wave a magic wand and be all 300-muscled.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I wish my puppy didn't chase the cats.

Granted, now the cats chase the puppy.



I wish I could wave a magic wand and be all 300-muscled.


Granted...you now have 300 muscles and a Magic Wand (http://shop.libida.com/Hitachi_magic_wand.asp). (Disclaimer: Link is not safe for work or small children.)

I wish the crack in my windshield hadn't grown 2 inches during the day. :(

[Crazeyal]

Granted...you now have 300 muscles and a Magic Wand (http://shop.libida.com/Hitachi_magic_wand.asp). Faaaabulous!!!

I wish the crack in my windshield hadn't grown 2 inches during the day. :(Granted! Your windshield busted out!

:wave:

I wish Beer had no calories and still got me drunk!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted but now you can't stand the taste.

I wish my apartment would clean itself...

[draggar]

Granted! But it cleaned out all of the stuff that you wanted.

I wish I could go see a good movie right now.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But it's only playing in Toronto.

I wish my neck didn't hurt and someone would come fix me dinner.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! Now you can't feel anything from your lower lip and down, and the hospital food is linquinie with jello spillage!

I wish I could get Raps laid!

[Meadhands]

I wish I could go see a good movie right now.

Granted! But it stars Larry the Cable Guy.

I wish I could get Raps laid!

Granted! However, PETA looks down upon what you are doing to those animals! :D

I wish I was not addicted to forums.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I wish I could get Raps laid!

Granted, but it's by you... :kiss:

I wish I had a boytoy...

[Crazeyal]

Granted, but it's by you... :kiss:
Oh BEHAAAAVE!!

I wish I had a boytoy...
Granted! You even got the bonus plan! Me and Raps want to have a little "POW-WOW" between this paddle, your fannie, and the Intranets!!



And I wish Meadhands had made a wish...

ANd I wish BSE hadn't been guzzumped by an edit button!! :lol:

[Chanlin]

@ Meadhands Wish

Granted, now you're no longer addicted, you're obsessed.

@Crazeal's wish

Granted, but the paradox from reversing time has caused it to appear that BSE got gazzumped anyway.


I wish I had a pet dog again.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Oh BEHAAAAVE!!

Where's the fun in that??


ANd I wish BSE hadn't been guzzumped by an edit button!! :lol:

I do not know what you are talking about. :angel:



I wish I had a pet dog again.

Granted, but the dog pets you.

[draggar]

I wish Bookstoreescapee wished a wish so I could mess it up for them. :)

[BookstoreEscapee]

I wish Bookstoreescapee wished a wish so I could mess it up for them. :)

Dammit! :doh: I wish I would stop doing that.

[AnqeiicDemise]

I wish Bookstoreescapee wished a wish so I could mess it up for them. :)

Granted! But then Bookstoreescapee would make the perfect wish and your sadist ways would be denied.


I wish I didn't have cramPs. -.-

[draggar]

Dammit! :doh: I wish I would stop doing that.

Granted! Now everything is a wish! :)

I wish I didn't have cramPs. -.-

Granted! Now your entire body is numb. You can't feel anything.

I wish I could buy a working, legal Nintendo Wii and all the accessories (including games) I want and play them on a perfectly working large-screen (48"+) TV. :)

[AnqeiicDemise]

Granted! Now everything is a wish! :)



Granted! Now your entire body is numb. You can't feel anything.

I wish I could buy a working, legal Nintendo Wii and all the accessories (including games) I want and play them on a perfectly working large-screen (48"+) TV. :)

Granted! But as soon as you fire up the wii you realized you forgot to pay your electric bill and now service has been shut off.


I wish my MIL wasn't so heart-set on moving to this state.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But you can't afford to eat for the rest of the year and you are too weak (wiik?) to play.


I wish my MIL wasn't so heart-set on moving to this state.

Granted. Now your hubsband is begging to move back to hers.


I wish the stray kitties around my apartment would make friends with me.

[draggar]

I wish the stray kitties around my apartment would make friends with me.

Granted, and so do the hundreds or thousands of other stray kitties in your neighborhood. :)

I wish my car had better gas mileage.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. But your tires keep going flat.

(There are 4 kitties that I see around here. One gray/white, one long-haired gray, one black/white, and one black. The doctor's office next door feeds them.)

I wish I didn't have to go to the dentist next weekend.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. Now they stay short and pointy.

I wish every cat scratch didn't turn into a scar.

[draggar]

I wish every cat scratch didn't turn into a scar.

Granted! Now they're all gaping wounds that never heal! :)

I wish the game never ended.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted. The game is Jumanji. Aaaand GO!!!

I wish I had a flip-top head like in the toothbrush commercials.

[worddork]

Granted, however it gets stuck in the open position and you drown during the rain storm.

I wish I didn't have to work and Friday, and could go see the new Indy movie

[karath]

Granted. Thanks to a terrorist threat against undisclosed people in your office, your building is shut down for the foreseeable future. Enjoy the movie! :devil:

I wish all my female friends weren't batshit fucking loco (I know you all aren't genies, but please! :D)

[Meadhands]

I wish all my female friends weren't batshit fucking loco

Please! Be reasonable!
I kid. Also, Granted! Now they are no longer crazy, but all of their super overly protective boyfriends ARE, and they don't like how you look at their gals.

I wish I had five legs!

[Becks]

Granted, but you only have one foot.

I wish I had more earrings.

[Emrld]

granted but they are all clip ons


I wish I could think of a wish that was challanging for others on this site to turn around. (gosh darn it ya'll are just too smart) ;)

[Meadhands]

I wish I could think of a wish that was challanging for others on this site to turn around. (gosh darn it ya'll are just too smart) ;)

Granted, but it is SO challenging, that everyone leaves the site in dismay, never to return.

I wish I had a panel of bulletproof glass.

[Trayol]

Granted, but it doesn't stop arrows.

I wish that I could do a backflip.

[Plaidman]

Granted, but it doesn't stop arrows.

I wish that I could do a backflip.

Granted, but it'll break your back, so you can only do it once.

I wish I had a time machine.

[Meadhands]

I wish I had a time machine.

Granted! It's called a "clock!"

I wish I could roll things up like in Katamari Damacy.

[InverseHellion]

Granted, now everything you touch sticks together in the shape of a ball. Don't touch yourself!

I wish I had a TARDIS.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! It comes with a strange tattoo K-9 on your torso, and some REALLY bad stiffness.. EVERYWHERE!!

I wish I could afford every autograph on the walk of fame at Dragoncon!

[Becks]

Granted, but you no longer want them.

I wish I could speak a certain foreign language.

[Evil Queen]

Granted. But now you want to speak a different one because no one speaks your current one.

I wish my nails were stronger.

[Crazeyal]

Granted! But the Adamantium comes with built-in memory loss, mega-angst and a furry FURRY back!! (plus lame Ninieties supervillan attacks!)

I wish I had a beeeelion dollahs!

[TealJellyfish]

Granted! Except that the currency of the world has now changed from Dollars to Donuts:)

I wish I wasn't bored at work all day!

[Crazeyal]

Granted! The axe murderer is QUITE interesting!!

I wish I could preview every last Superhero movie with final say whether it gets out to the public!

[TealJellyfish]

Granted! Everyone hates your version, the movie bombs and they never make anymore!

I wish that going to the doctor wasn't so scary

[Crazeyal]

Granted! The frontal lobotomy took care of all that nasty fear!!

I wish for the ability to legally murder the asshats who REALLY need it!

[Trayol]

Granted, but you can only do it with a dull plastic spork.

I wish I had the ability to think stupid people away.

[TealJellyfish]

Granted: BUT for every stupid person you think away you lose a limb and a tiger takes the persons place:)


I wish I was not at work!

[Crazeyal]

Granted! You are now a volunteer!

I wish I could get paid for this!