I almost lost my daughter today!

[CaroPhoenix]

:cry::cry:

Kelly & I had to go out to run some errands. I had already gotten her dressed and then I went upstairs to get dressed. Kelly had followed me for a moment, but then wandered back to the living room (I figured 'cos her favorite channel was on). I got dressed, got some more dress shirts of my husband's to get dry cleaned (one of my errands) and when I went down the stairs, pausing to slip on my shoes, I realized the main floor was quiet.

I rounded the corner and saw the french door in the kitchen was ajar and I thought Kelly was just outside on the deck like she's normally wont to do because she likes to dance out there. I called her name, and I heard an answering "Aaaah!" like she sometimes says. Then I really looked out the door, and I was like: :jawdrop: :eek:

My daughter was standing/grasping to the deck railing from the other side of the deck! Somehow, she'd pushed a chair up to the railing, climbed chair, got body over railing and could have let go at anytime to fall to the ground below (1 story drop - townhouse is 3 levels: top which is bedrooms, middle which is main floor, bottom which is the basement/laundry room). The door out to the deck has 2 chain locks attached to it. The bottom lock was completely undone, but the top one wasn't. She wriggled through the ajar door 'cos she's skinny and wriggles well. I had to fumble with the top chain, threw open the door and I was screaming: "Kelly! Stop! Don't move! Kelly! Kelly!" I grabbed her forearms and pulled her back over her railing.

Then I started to cry. Realizing just how close she & I were to having her fall off the edge of the onto the ground below. She could have broken something or everything.

I'm shaking as I write this and it happened 3 hours ago.

And the kicker? She didn't understand what she did wrong. And the reason for her wanting to jump from the deck? She had brought 3 toys out with her & one fell off the deck to the ground below so she must have decided to go after it. I think I aged 30 years in 30 seconds.

:cry::cry:

[Shangri-laschild]

*hugs* That had to have been very scary and I can see how it would be frustrating that she didn't understand why not to do that again. Sending lots of good thoughts.

[Evil Queen]

I know it's mean, but maybe we should put a little tracking collar on Kelly or something.

Hey, I grew up with a leash.

Actually, they just advertised (for batteries but it was in the device) for some device that basically tracks your kid. You put the little "bug" in their shoe or something and, if you misplace your kid, it tells you if you're getting closer or farther away.

I'd never seen one befor ethe battery commerical, but that was one hell of a cool little gadget. Any idea what it's called?

[SorryIsGoodEnough]

I know how you feel! It's so scary when my 8 month old does something that freaks me out like that. Like choking on a rock at the beach when I was looking at her the WHOLE TIME and I would have SWORN she didn't have a rock in her hand at ALL.

Kids.

[CaroPhoenix]

What Kelly needs is a choke collar/chain & be attached to either the couch in the living room or to the foot board in her bedroom. :lol: I don't know. I do know one couple who has an autistic daughter (who is also 2 or 3 years older than Kelly) and they have her on medication (not sure what kind) am I'm going to have to talk to her doctor about it.

What I do know is, if I have to board up the french doors, I will.

[Aethian]

Maybe not board them up but make it so that she can't open them.

[freeatlast]

When my daughter was that age, we put hook & eye latches at the top of each of the doors. She was always tall for her age and could reach and unlock the regular door latches. But she couldn't reach those hook & eye latches at the top of the doors. Hell, I'm short and it was a stretch for me to reach them. But, that way she could look outside (which was one of her favorite pasttimes) but could not open the doors. It made me feel much better.

[CaroPhoenix]

I know boarding up the french doors is a little too harsh. However, I have made an appointment with a local remodeling company to have the deck looked at/examined (it's 21 years old). We might have to get a completely new deck. (Yay!)

I've also let the company know that I was looking into a privacy screen of sorts to put up also, so they know what I'm looking for.

After I get the estimate, and paperwork, then I'm going to be sending in paperwork to the HOA and letting them know what we're going to be doing and why. (There is the possibility that they'd deny it, but I'll be putting it in the paperwork why we want the privacy screen and everything. And I'll fight them if they deny it. Oi.

[draftermatt]

Sorry that happened to you and her. That kind of thing is always scary.

And I'll fight them if they deny it. Oi.

Just make sure that there's nothing in the bylaws/guidelines against it. I know with my HOA they have to approve something as long as there's nothing in the bylaws about it (or it's just stupid/unsafe, etc)

[CaroPhoenix]

draftermatt - I'll be reading the bylaws this morning as soon as I'm done posting this. :) I also know one of the people on the board so I can get advice from her.

As for the door - Hubs fixed it last night. We no longer have a doorknob. We just have a double sided deadbolt in place of it. This way, Kelly can't get out of the house no matter how many times she undoes the chain locks. :D

However, I'm still going to be getting the estimate for the deck. It needs to be done. I'm also going to get an estimate for hard wood floors throughout the main level. Whew - what has gotten into me? :)

[Emrld]

oh Honey . . .my heart stopped for you while reading this.
You are such a wonderful and caring Mother. Whomever/ whatever is in charge of the universe did the right thing in putting Kelly in your (and hubby's) care.

As for the HOA - yes, follow proper procedure and be glad you don't live in Frisco - ok I will start another thread for that one.

Hugs for you

[CaroPhoenix]

From the regulations off our HOA's website:

(1) Decks: Deck railings shall not exceed 42" in height. The ARB shall consider approval of enclosure of the area under a deck or the addition of a trellis, arbor, screen or lattice on a case by case basis. The ARB shall determine whether the design and location will preserve all natural and scenic views and will enhance the visual impact on neighboring homeowners.

(4) Privacy Screens/Panels, Lattice, Trellis, Arbor, Etc.: The installation of privacy screens/panels, lattice, trellis, arbors, etc. requires approval by the ARB prior to installation. These structures are generally not acceptable on second level townhome decks. For single-family units, privacy screens, lattice, trellis, arbors, etc. is not permitted for the purpose of enclosing a rear yard in lieu of an ARB approved fence.

The lattices/privacy screens/etc. are generally. not. acceptable(!?). on second level townhome decks. We have one deck - that's at the second level (main) of our house. GAH ... Now I'm having nightmares about not getting the lattice or whatever I want attached. :cry:

How should I word my request in the paperwork? Any and all help will be appreciated! Thanks!

[Emrld]

Make sure that you point out what you are wanting has to do with the safety of your child. And, why with your child it is necessary for her safety.

[CaroPhoenix]

Kelly, smart little bugger that she is, has figured out that she needs a key to open the french door in the kitchen. Whilst I was in the front powder room um ... powdering my nose ... I heard "climb, climb, jingle of keys". I realized she had snatched my key ring down! :eek: :cry:

We're definitely NOT getting a door handle to the french door now. What now? Should I hide the keys?

[DesignFox]

aw Rum...good luck figuring out your doors. I'll keep you in my thoughts...my heart leapt in my throat, too reading your OP! :hug:

[InsanityInc]

We're definitely NOT getting a door handle to the french door now. What now? Should I hide the keys?

When my munchkin was that age I had pretty good luck with putting my keys and other non-kid items on top of the fridge and my pair of 5-shelf bookcases. Even with a chair she was too short to reach the top.

[Emrld]

It sounds like Miss Kelly is observing and repeating what she see adults do.
If you add any other locks to the door . . .you will have to make sure she is not around when you lock/ unlock them. (Including if you put stops in the top of the door.)

Without creating a lot of work for yourself I am at a loss for solutions.

Make sure Kelly knows it was wrong to "move/use" Mommy's keys without permission.

Do you remember the movie with Steve Martin A Simple Twist of Fate? At one point he takes a pretty red ribbon and ties it around the little girl and a heavy piece of furniture so she can't go outside and get hurt.

Take joy in the fact that she is mimicing what she see Mommy and Daddy do. It may not be things she should be doing . . .but it does mean she is watching, remembering, and repeating what she sees.

[CaroPhoenix]

Emrld - that's the problem - she's very good at mimicking what she sees/hears. :) She doesn't have photographic memory (that is where you look at a page in a book and memorize it in like .3 seconds flat), but she has something similar where you can see something done once and you remember it forever and ever Amen.

Kelly's in the 95th percentile of children her age in the height category. She's 46" tall (3 feet 10 inches tall). No matter what she climbs, she's generally tall enough to reach just about anything wherever she climbs.

We're trying to drill into her head that she's not allowed outside without Mommy & Daddy or Nana & Papa (my parents). When we're at my in-laws' house, I keep an eagle eye out on her.

Fortunately, the deck guy is coming tomorrow, this will be the central point around what we'll be discussing.