Life: A Nice Big "Fuck You"

[the_std]

So, I need to get out of this house. Everyone I've talked to, including my therapist, agrees with this. It is the major source of all of the stress and anger in my life, and that is a hell of a lot of it. So my friend, his boyfriend and I start looking for places. They are the only people I know who are willing to move out, and who can afford to do it. We find an apartment, the perfect one, very affordable, awesome location, everything is going well. Get it all set up, just have to set the possession date. I am the main contact in this, taking responsibility for setting up meetings and such, the face to the landlord.

Then the boyfriend emails me with a bunch of shit about how this "just isn't the time" and "too much stress" and "too rushed". So now, not only do I look like the bad guy having to back out of this deal, I have no way to move out of the place that stresses me out more than anything else in my life. I can't afford a place on my own, have no other choices for room-mates, nothing. I've lost twenty pounds in the past two weeks, can hardly eat or sleep, am just barely surviving. I can't go a week without life pissing on me, and now, the one thing I thought that could start the fix...

I don't know who I pissed off Up There, but they are sure having fun with me now.

[Aethian]

So move without the boyfriend, sounds like you don't need him if he can't make the next step into being independant.

[One-Fang]

I agree, move anyway. Front up the rent for as long as you can between the two of you and look for a roomie. Advertise.

Or were friend and boyfriend sharing a room? That'd make it a bit more difficult. :)

[PizzaDrone]

I'd be quite careful, because even if you do move out with the friend there is always the chance of the boyfriend coming to stay. Sometimes when one has their own place its tempting to the other partner to spend a great deal of time there, which is almost like they are living there...just without paying anything.

Not suggesting that the boyfriend would do this, just that its a possible thing to consider. I'd third the stuff about moving out anyway. Perhaps downgrade a little to make things more affordable and if after a little while you're not struggling, go back for perfect apartment.

[Shards]

From reading this, I can only guess at the circumstances, but it doesn't sound like friend is willing to move without boyfriend, and that is a major kink in the plan.

My condolences, man. Dunno what to say.

[the_std]

Yeah, sorry, we were looking at two bedroom places. The friend and the boyfriend were a package deal.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I found my roommate on roommate.com. You have to be careful, of course, but we've worked out great. Actually, we're sitting here watching movies and drinking strawberry "champagne" as I type. They have a Canada site (http://ca.roommates.com/), too.

[the_std]

BSE, that site looks great but, right now, I have trouble even thinking of trusting a stranger if my friends have fucked me over.

[BookstoreEscapee]

BSE, that site looks great but, right now, I have trouble even thinking of trusting a stranger if my friends have fucked me over.

I can understand that. Something to keep in mind, though. :) I hope things work out soon.

[Aethian]

Did she f you over too or did he? I would talk to her about the two of you still getting said place since he isn't responsible enough.

[the_std]

When I got the email from his boyfriend I called him up, and he said that they'd talked about it and this was the decision they wanted to make. Like I said, they're a package deal.

[Aethian]

Gah...I'm sorry.

Could you find another place in the same area for yourself?

[the_std]

I wish, but I can't afford it on my own. The place we were looking at was $1200 a month, so $400 a month each. Standard one-bedroom places here average at least $800 or $900 a month, which I can't do... I was really quite betting on my room-mates.

[Evil Queen]

Do what I did when my old Roommate J moved out. Get one from here.

R has been a great roommate and a great friend, though he and The SO like to play a lot of computer games together. -_-'

[the_std]

EQ, I would love to because most people here are awesome, but I'm pretty sure I'm the only person in my city who frequents this forum. Although, just to make sure, anyone else from Saskatoon, SK hanging around here?

[Slytovhand]

How about GK?? :p

Ok, more seriously, apparently it's a friend's prerogative to fuck you over. Strangers are a little different.

How about you do the searching on that site for you to move into?? Your name isn't on anything, they are less likely to fuck you over, as they are the one's already planted, and if it doesn't move, you're not stuck with commitment things (like power, phone, bonds etc).

[the_std]

I signed up for the site and have looked around a bit, but it seems that my city isn't big enough to really warrant much attention. There are only two ads for my city. One sounds quite sketchy and the other is more than I can pay. Man, I love living in the middle of nowhere...

[RetailWorkhorse]

See, STD, this is when you buy yourself a used RV and just park in a campground nearby. Rent's cheaper, someone else cleans the bathrooms, and if the weather sucks too much you can move a little further south until the weather suits your clothes.

But then that's my lifestyle that's about to start up again.

And I can't remember what you do for a paycheck.

[Kyree]

You could always move to Minnesota! My boyfriend and I are looking for a roomate :(

[the_std]

I've currently got three jobs. Working for a second-hand department store, modeling for art classes and then teaching some courses at the University. Not exactly something I can pick up and walk away from on short notice. Plus, the thought of living in an RV when winters are regularly -30 Celsius isn't a terribly exciting prospect. It would be lovely if I could do it, I wish I could, but it's not exactly a feasible option at the mo'.

[RetailWorkhorse]

I've currently got three jobs. Working for a second-hand department store, modeling for art classes and then teaching some courses at the University. Not exactly something I can pick up and walk away from on short notice. Plus, the thought of living in an RV when winters are regularly -30 Celsius isn't a terribly exciting prospect. It would be lovely if I could do it, I wish I could, but it's not exactly a feasible option at the mo'.

Nutz. because it occurred to me yesterday that I need a partner to drive my Jeep (which Mom says I'll need to downsize soon to something else) while I'm driving and towing the RV and hotdog cart.

[the_std]

RWW, the nomadic life greatly appeals to me, actually. If I could, I would totally be the Thelma to your Louise!

[RetailWorkhorse]

RWW, the nomadic life greatly appeals to me, actually. If I could, I would totally be the Thelma to your Louise!

That's the spirit, mate!

Someone remind me at some point to DL that movie so I can see it again. Lifetime or whatever that other "women's channel" thing is keeps cutting out stuff. *Grr*

[Jester]

Did she f you over too or did he? I would talk to her about the two of you still getting said place since he isn't responsible enough.

I don't know that he is irresponsible. He called off the deal BEFORE anything was final, which speaks to some responsibility on his part. He realized he wasn't ready for the whole deal, and called it off. It sucks in general, it sucks for std, but I don't think it is all that irresponsible.

Of course, what do I know? I'm just a court jester in the tropics....... http://www.spokanestreetracing.com/forums/images/smiles/hat16.gif

[the_std]

Oh, I'm grateful (for a given value of the word) for the fact that they called it off before we moved in, but that's not really saying much. The only way it could have been worse was if they fucked me over for money as well as somewhere to live.

[Jester]

Std, I have been in many living situations and had many things happen, both good and bad.

TRUST me when I tell you that there are a LOT of ways it could have been worse, not just one. :lol:

I know you are loathe to hook up with strangers, but if your current domicile is that bad for you, you might want to consider it. Or start asking around at work. Hell, you have three jobs....that's three times the potential roommate pool! :D