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View Full Version : Not looking forward to Monday - LONG


Seanette
10-14-2006, 03:18 AM
Monday's gonna suck. I get a lovely court appearance, thanks to an ex-friend (who's a paralegal/legal secretary. This *is* relevant later) whose chronic problems are not all physical.

LONG story here, but I'll try to give you the condensed version: met her online, we wound up friendly. She's got a *long* list of chronic problems (funny how said problems keep her from working or cleaning house, but don't keep her from power-shopping, traveling, etc.), including alleged blackouts and balance issues, along with supposed chronic fatigue syndrome. After a few years of occasional visits, e-mail, etc., DH and I had hit a crisis point involving there being NO jobs to be had in the area we were living in, so we wound up moving here and staying with her while we were getting our feet under us. Game plan was for us to help get the house shoveled out, which proved an impossibility when it was already overflowing with stuff, more flowed in all the time (since we had a car and she doesn't drive, she considered chauffeur service to shop part of the deal), and she kept undoing anything that was done (she'd even manage to reclutter walkways as fast as I'd clear them, and I would have thought someone with her alleged balance problems and blackouts would consider having safe footing on the floor instead of skating on paper, magazines, etc., over hard wood a *good* thing). We moved into our present apartment in Sept. 2004.

Fast-forward to early Sept. 2005: it's between Katrina and Labor Day, I clearly remember. I get a text message at work from her cell phone. "PLEASE CALL", all caps (not typical). Take break (office job, very flexible supe, slow day anyway), try to comply, cannot reach her on either her landline or her cell. I'm about 15 miles away and do not have the car. Call DH, consult with him. He cannot check on her, since he's got to get to work himself and does not think he has a key anyway (he did, as did I, but he'd honestly forgotten that he did). After some discussion covering such points as the very obstructed pathways, her many medical problems, etc., we decide that yes, there's cause for concern. I call the local police (can't remember whether I used 911 or the non-emergency number, in all honesty) and ask them to have someone check on her, giving the medical picture and the info about the unusual text message.

A bit later, I get a call from then-friend herself, going nuclear on me because the health department was called in by the police after they broke in and saw the place (turned out she was having lunch with her boyfriend). Allegedly, she'd left voicemail (my cell carrier informed me when I asked about this that it's not possible for an attempted voicemail to transmute into a text message), was bitching about how I'd even known about the call while at work (so why'd she call then, anyway? She knew my schedule), and assured me that not only was I spending the holiday weekend cleaning her house but that I was paying all financial costs. My reaction was along the lines of "oh HELL no! You're ranting and raving and threatening me, you're bigger than I am, I've seen you flinging some pretty heavy stuff, especially for an "invalid", when you didn't like the fact that something had to be moved to clean, I'm emotional hamburger lately anyway, and you think I'm going to voluntarily get anywhere near you until you're rational again?" (OK, not those words, but basic concept.) Simply put, I honestly believed that I had cause to fear for my physical safety in her presence at that time. I *knew* that if I subjected myself to her behavior, I'd wind up in need of inpatient psychiatric care. I *could not* deal with the berserker rage she was unloading.

About two weeks ago, stranger arrives at door, confirms who I am, hands me envelope. I'm being taken to small claims court because Ms. "think nothing of dropping hundreds at a shot on craft supplies, books, etc., while living on disability insurance" got hit for tax liens for costs relating to the health department matter (apparently, she didn't bother to pay the city's fees, and claims she could not find anyone to "satisfactorily" clean the place), and believes that because I couldn't get the place shoveled out in the two months I was there while coping with her active sabotage of cleaning efforts (she even screamed at me for throwing out some very stale crackers with a charming hint of mold in the taste while retrieving same from a garbage can that ISTR even had used cat litter in it at the time) plus relocation, marital stress, serious financial stress, her verbal abuse (for over two months, my name was "slave" as far as she was concerned), etc., that costs relating to the condition of the place a year after I moved out are my responsibility.

I did consult a law-student friend. He declined to make any definite statement on the quite reasonable grounds that he is not a practicing attorney, but did express the personal opinion there's no case here. I hope the judge agrees. Either way, DH and I are both missing half a day of work, and the plaintiff has a history of conveniently being "too ill" for scheduled legal proceedings. I know from her own statement (relating to another piece of litigation of hers) that she'll do this on purpose out of sheer malice for the other party, so it won't surprise me if she does this to me a few times.

I think one of tomorrow's errands is going to be a trip to Cold Stone for some ice cream (I like the cheesecake base with fudge syrup and cherry pie filling), and I'd better make sure I have lots of tyrosine.

Becks
10-14-2006, 03:22 AM
Seanette, as I was reading this, all I could do was go :eek: :eek: ...

I hope it all works out in your favor. You deserve better than that.

Seanette
10-14-2006, 03:38 AM
This being California and the plaintiff being a professional victim, we shall see. I'll certainly take any prayers/good thoughts/purrs/whatever suits your belief system. :)

BlaqueKatt
10-14-2006, 04:16 AM
if she doesn't show up ask the judge to dismiss the case "with prejudice"-just means it cannot be filed again-EVER! Would save the hassle-plus if she tries again you could counter file for harassment.


BlaqueKatt-who is not a lawyer, and does not play one on tv....

Seanette
10-14-2006, 05:34 AM
if she doesn't show up ask the judge to dismiss the case "with prejudice"-just means it cannot be filed again-EVER! Would save the hassle-plus if she tries again you could counter file for harassment.
BlaqueKatt-who is not a lawyer, and does not play one on tv....
Certainly worth trying, IMO. :)

I don't want a confrontation, I just want this to go away, but the only way she'll willingly go away is if I cough up over $2000 I don't have so I can pay for the results of her set of priorities regarding time, energy, money, etc. To get her to back off, I'd also have to go along with her claim that I *deliberately* called the health department's attention to her (completely false, I honestly had NO idea that *could* happen when I asked the police to check on her, honestly believing there was a reasonable possibility of a medical emergency, and then there's her paranoia about her ex-husband showing up (no evidence that he has any interest in doing so that I'm aware of), and I'd spent *years* hearing about the evil ex and the medical problems and so on), and that I never lifted a finger when I was staying there (also totally false - on the day we moved out, that house was, while still squalid, in the best shape I ever saw it, before or since). Not gonna happen, so I'm getting a battle I didn't want and don't need. (sigh)

Barefootgirl
10-16-2006, 08:11 AM
Certainly worth trying, IMO. :)

I don't want a confrontation, I just want this to go away, but the only way she'll willingly go away is if I cough up over $2000 I don't have

That's called blackmail, hun. Blackmailers KNOW that people don't want confrontation, that's how they choose their victims.

From your account, I can't see what grounds a judge would have to find against you; even in California, how can reporting a vulnerable adult to the Health Deaprtment be an offence? If your names weren't on the lease, or tenancy agreement while you lived there, how can you be responsible for her tax affairs?

Cia
10-16-2006, 05:24 PM
You aren't married to her and you don't have Power of Attorney so you are not responsible for her tax problems. She is passing the buck, so to speak, and playing the professional victim to a T.

If she doesn't show up at court ask the judge to do what BlaqueKatt suggested, can't hurt to ask. And even if she does show up, no Judge worth his/her salt is going to have you pay that woman's obligations.

Also block her number on your cell, landline and e-mail. She's pure poison.

Seanette
10-17-2006, 03:00 AM
Any e-mail, as of last I knew, redirects to DH (with his approval. He helped set this up), my cell carrier does not have the capacity to block specific numbers (they say they can very easily change my number if I need them to, but she hasn't tried phone calls in over a year), and she probably still thinks the landline is perpetually busy (and we're unlisted), since she probably doesn't know we now have DSL.

Update: hit my favorite thrift store Saturday for suitable wardrobe, found a nice suit, several tops (one of which worked beautifully, IMO, with said suit), etc. I think I might have worried my supervisor a little by showing up in a suit, because she asked as I was leaving, "You *are* going to be here tomorrow, aren't you?" in a rather worried tone. I assured her I would be. :) DH, of course, went with a suit as well. Plaintiff shows up in rather casual skirt/blouse combo, very ratty hair that looks a week or two overdue for brushing (this does tend to be a typical look. I would think that if shoulder problems made hairbrushing a major chore, short hair would be a good solution to this). DH and I, while waiting our turn, are very quiet, while plaintiff is rustling through papers (warned against by staff before the session started on grounds of room acoustics), noisily opening container of food and snacking during the wait (eating was, of course, banned).

We're the next-to-last case, and the defendants after us are against the same plaintiff (dunno how their case went, since we left right after ours), so very few people on hand. Plaintiff snaps at the judge several times to "let me tell this my way" instead of simply answering questions (DH and I are going out of our way to behave calmly and respectfully), and generally insists on ranting and fuming, while His Honor is trying to guide the conversation. Our turn, we make our points, His Honor assures me he has no doubt at all that the phone call incident was in good faith on my side, he quizzes plaintiff *hard* about the options she has (not) pursued on the housekeeping front, and looks stunned when he gets the date on which DH and I moved out (about 9/18/04, maybe a day or two plus/minus), and the date on which her housekeeping hit the official fan (9/2/05). At some point during plaintiff's ranting, I hear an odd sound, look to my left, and the court attendant (I guess similar to a bailiff in criminal court) is doing his manful best to conceal snickering (also giving me a sympathetic "I do NOT believe this!" smile).

Decision arrives by mail in about two weeks. I think things look good for us.

XCashier
10-17-2006, 03:11 AM
I think the Drama Queen went a little overboard in this latest performance. The judge doesn't seem to buy her act, so hopefully things will go well for you.

Best of luck with the decision!

Bob Blaylock
10-17-2006, 03:42 AM
His Honor…looks stunned when he gets the date on which DH and I moved out (about 9/18/04, maybe a day or two plus/minus), and the date on which her housekeeping hit the official fan (9/2/05).

**It was about this time that the judge rather abruptly cut off any further discussion, said he'd take the case “under submission”, and promised to send us a decision in a few weeks by mail.

**I have to think that if*—*at this point*—*he was still entertaining any possibility of finding against us, that he would have given us further opportunity to explain ourselves.

Spiffy McMoron
10-17-2006, 04:50 AM
Decision arrives by mail in about two weeks. I think things look good for us.

I find it kinda odd that they would send a court decision through the mail-I figured that they would call you into court again. What would happen if the letter was lost or stolen?

Seanette
10-18-2006, 02:51 AM
I find it kinda odd that they would send a court decision through the mail-I figured that they would call you into court again. What would happen if the letter was lost or stolen?
[shrug] I would guess the court is aware of the possibility and will deal appropriately. If we don't hear in a few weeks, we can look up the results at the court house.

Seanette
10-21-2006, 12:46 AM
Update:
The Small Claims decision arrived today.

DH and I won. From the notice we received (the only change I am making is to omit the parties' names for obvious reasons): "The Defendants do not owe the Plaintiff any money/property on
Plaintiff's claim". Note: in California, only the defendant(s) in a Small Claims case may appeal an adverse ruling. The plaintiff may not. DH and I had at least two dice rolls if we needed that many, the other party only had one and has lost on that roll.

That's over and done with. I gather from informed sources the other party has gone a bit nuclear, but NBD as far as I'm concerned (this is not someone capable of posing a physical threat, at least not without blowing claims of disability sky-high). I'm just going to go on about my merry way in life, feel great pity for the other party, and put in much prayer for her well-being.

Barefootgirl
10-21-2006, 08:51 PM
I am really, really glad for you that this has worked out in your favour. I hope you and hubby can pop open something cold and fizzy to celebrate getting this person off your back.

Pity and prayer are definitely the way to go, IMHO.

XCashier
10-21-2006, 08:58 PM
I'm just going to go on about my merry way in life, feel great pity for the other party, and put in much prayer for her well-being.
And say one for the wise judge who handed down such a well-deserved judgement! We need more judges like him in the system. :)

Congrats on winning the case! :cheers:

friendofjimmyk
10-22-2006, 01:08 AM
Wow. I am glad all worked out well for you. It's a good thing that, even though you were stressed out over the issue, you kept your cool.

Cia
10-23-2006, 04:33 PM
They'll probably send it certified and return receipt requested.

Congrates on your win! I wonder what was going through the Judge's brain when he found out that you had left almost a full year before the Health Dept was called in.

Seanette
10-24-2006, 01:33 AM
They'll probably send it certified and return receipt requested.

Congrates on your win! I wonder what was going through the Judge's brain when he found out that you had left almost a full year before the Health Dept was called in.
It arrived regular mail, actually.

I'm not a telepath ;) , but His Honor's expression was along the lines of "she *cannot* be serious!!", I thought. I'm sure my husband will have a comment or two of his own :) .

Bob Blaylock
10-25-2006, 10:05 AM
I wonder what was going through the Judge's brain when he found out that you had left almost a full year before the Health Dept was called in.

Have you ever seen the movie The Hunt for Red October (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099810/)? There's a scene, very near the end, where a Soviet diplomat and an American diplomat are discussing the situation; and the Soviet diplomat mentions that another of their submarines is missing. The American—with great incredulity—responds, “You've lost another submarine?” Have you ever seen that? That's about how the judge responded to the plaintiff at this point. She might as well have come out and told the judge that she was missing a full-scale nuclear attack submarine, and accused Seanette and me of having stolen it—I don't think the judge's reaction would have been much different. As I said before, it was at this point that he very abruptly cut off any further discussion of this case, and promised to send a ruling in the mail within a few weeks. The letter which we received informing us of the ruling was dated that very same day.

The judge seemed quite skeptical of the plaintiff's claims almost from the beginning. He questioned the plaintiff quite intensely, trying to get something—anything—out of her to convince him that Seanette and I might be responsible for the situation which had arisen regarding her house and the health inspectors.

Cia
10-25-2006, 06:43 PM
Yep seen the movie. Ahh I can see the Judge's reaction now.

carynlws
10-31-2006, 02:19 PM
It arrived regular mail, actually.

I'm not a telepath ;) , but His Honor's expression was along the lines of "she *cannot* be serious!!", I thought. I'm sure my husband will have a comment or two of his own :) .


Seanette,

I know in the past you and I did not get along, mostly because of my stand on your Ex-Friend. I'd felt for years that she lies, exaggerates and uses people. She once bragged about how she had a "real friend" in you, because you were willing to come visit her to clean her house. I was alway amazed at that as a definition of friendship.

I'm so very very glad you won, and that person can never, ever sue you again!!

Please consider returning to RCTN, don't let her presense keep you away. I hope that we can be on friendly terms from now on.
:)
Caryn

Seanette
11-01-2006, 05:35 PM
Hi, Caryn!

I don't know that I'll find time for Usenet since signal/noise is pretty poor, I don't have much taste for flamepits such as RCTN usually is, and I'm pulling some long days lately (only reason I'm online now is that I called in sick today with sinus problems and some digestive misbehavior that made an hour-plus commute via public transit a bad idea), but I'd certainly not mind hearing from you. My personal e-mail address has not changed from the one you saw in that group (I've had that one for something like eight years now), so feel free to drop me a line. There are a few people in that group I'd rather not hear from (such as a certain unreadable "linguistic expert" or a particular religious bigot (sure, her problem is with a church other than my own, but the principle of not associating with bigots if I can avoid it remains)), but you're not on that (short) list. You might even get a giggle out of a few things I'd rather not post publicly. :D