Extremely wrong answers to obvious questions....GAME!

[Chanlin]

Because you didn't scratch first.

Are you ready to rumble?

[CaroPhoenix]

Are you ready to rumble?

Not with my hurty knees and hands. :cry:

Who is Conan?

[BookstoreEscapee]

The Librarian.

Mr. Brown can moo! Can you?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

The Librarian.

Mr. Brown can moo! Can you?

No but I've been known to go quackers.:p

Why does the phone ring when I'm going out the door?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Because it misses you and doesn't want you to leave it all alone.

How come you can wear a bikini in public but not your underwear?

[Chanlin]

You cant? Oh you mean without other clothes over the underwear... nope... i've got nothin... I'd also like to point out I'm pretty sure my wearing of a bikini in public would get me laughed at... although the high heels and lipstick....

why are you looking at me like that? (yes this is the new question)

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Because it misses you and doesn't want you to leave it all alone.

How come you can wear a bikini in public but not your underwear?

Because you can't go swimming in your underwear.

Why are there a couple of blank keys on my laptop keyboard on either side of the arrow up key?

[Jack T. Chance]

Because you can't go swimming in your underwear.

Why are there a couple of blank keys on my laptop keyboard on either side of the arrow up key?Because they forgot to label them! Those are the "Any" keys, as in "Press any key to continue"! ;)

Why is it that the downturn in the economy made ALL customers sucky beyond belief, not just the ones that sucked before the economy went into the crapper? :confused:

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Because they forgot to label them! Those are the "Any" keys, as in "Press any key to continue"! ;)

Why is it that the downturn in the economy made ALL customers sucky beyond belief, not just the ones that sucked before the economy went into the crapper? :confused:

Because suck is contagious and there's currently no known research program underway nor an annual telethon hosted by Jerry Lewis (or some other ancient entertainer) to benefit anyone who has the disorder.

Do fish ever swim upside down?

[McGoddess09]

Because suck is contagious and there's currently no known research program underway nor an annual telethon hosted by Jerry Lewis (or some other ancient entertainer) to benefit anyone who has the disorder.

Do fish ever swim upside down?


Only if they are "sleeping"

Why does Taylor Swift call herself 'The Scarlet Letter' in Love Story,when it doesn't really have a good meaning to it?

[Jack T. Chance]

Only if they are "sleeping"

Why does Taylor Swift call herself 'The Scarlet Letter' in Love Story,when it doesn't really have a good meaning to it?'Cause she's a dumb blonde and a former contestant on American Idolatry! Duh! :p

Why ask why?

[McGoddess09]

'Cause she's a dumb blonde and a former contestant on American Idolatry! Duh! :p

Why ask why?

(*nitpick* Taylor Swift was never on American Idol. That was Carrie Underwood. And no, I don't watch that show)

It's because I want to.


Why am I always correcting people? :p

[DesignFox]

(*nitpick* Taylor Swift was never on American Idol. That was Carrie Underwood. And no, I don't watch that show)

It's because I want to.


Why am I always correcting people? :p

'Cause you can. ;)

How did I possibly fit all that food in my tummy? (mmmm Ihop pancakes....)

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Very carefully.

Why do I have a headache?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Cuz of the little guy in there with the hammer (don't worry, I have one, too).

Are you in a New York state of mind?

[Jack T. Chance]

Cuz of the little guy in there with the hammer (don't worry, I have one, too).

Are you in a New York state of mind?Nope, I'm a Mid-Atlantic spirit! ;)

Who flung poo? :confused:

[McGoddess09]

Nope, I'm a Mid-Atlantic spirit! ;)

Who flung poo? :confused:

The Evil Monkey in my closet.

Does drinking really solve the problem?

[BookstoreEscapee]

If the problem is that you're sober, sure...

What'll it be?

[McGoddess09]

If the problem is that you're sober, sure...

What'll it be?

A shot of chill the *censored* out for some of my customers.

What is with these people looking for love on television?

[BookstoreEscapee]

You can find anything on TV these days...

Do you wanna buy a Sham-Wow?

[Jack T. Chance]

You can find anything on TV these days...

Do you wanna buy a Sham-Wow?Nope. I also refuse to buy Sham-Poo. I demand REAL poo! ;)

Do you know the muffin man?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Well, I know of him, but haven't met him in person.

Why is Pablo staring at me from the living room and crying?

[XCashier]

Either he wants feeding or you've hurt his feelings.

How many pages can this thread go?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Forever! And ever! And ever! And ever!

How is babby formed?

[MannersMakethMan]

Forever! And ever! And ever! And ever!

How is babby formed?

Well, when a mummy and a daddy love each other very much.... They go up a big escalator into the sky, to visit the Baby-Making-Panda.
They say "Oh, baby-making-panda, we want a baby!"
And then the baby-making-panda takes a lump of clay, and shapes it into a boy or a girl baby, and gives it to the mummy and daddy

Why does this only happen on a full moon?

[DesignFox]

Why does this only happen on a full moon?

'Cause the full moon causes hallucinations....

Why can't it be Spring already? :cry:

[Jack T. Chance]

'Cause the full moon causes hallucinations....

Why can't it be Spring already? :cry:Because then I'd have to jump into an airplane and spray AGENT ORANGE on all the foliage to get rid of the pollen that causes my hay fever! :devil:

Why can't it be FEBRUARY 11th already? :confused:

--Jack (Who's anxious for it to be February 11th so he can hit-up T-Mobile for a lovely new BlackBerry! :D)

[McGoddess09]

Because then I'd have to jump into an airplane and spray AGENT ORANGE on all the foliage to get rid of the pollen that causes my hay fever! :devil:

Why can't it be FEBRUARY 11th already? :confused:

--Jack (Who's anxious for it to be February 11th so he can hit-up T-Mobile for a lovely new BlackBerry! :D)

Because Father Time wants to torture you to the fullest extent,

Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me? :p

[Jack T. Chance]

Because Father Time wants to torture you to the fullest extent,

Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me? :pWhat is this "gurl-frend" of which you speak? I am not knowing this word. :confused:

Want a Fanta, don't you, don't you want a Fanta?

[BookstoreEscapee]

NOOO!!! Why must you always remind me!!?? :cry:

Tastes great or less filling?

[Jack T. Chance]

NOOO!!! Why must you always remind me!!?? :cry:Because I can! ;)Tastes great or less filling?Tastes filling! :D

Why, oh why, didn't I take the BLUE pill? :confused:

[BookstoreEscapee]

We don't need to know about your sexual difficulties, thank you very much.

What you gon' do with all that junk?/All that junk inside your trunk?

[MannersMakethMan]

Put it to one side to sort it, until one day it really annoys me and ends up going into a skip.

Scooby Doo, where are you?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Dead and buried.

If you had a hammer, would you hammer in the morning?

[BookstoreEscapee]

I don't even see morning if I can help it, so no.

How late is too late to still have Christmas decorations up?

[McGoddess09]

I don't even see morning if I can help it, so no.

How late is too late to still have Christmas decorations up?

If the snow has melted, then you really need to take them down.

Who would win an oreo eating contest?

[BookstoreEscapee]

If the snow has melted, then you really need to take them down.

Who would win an oreo eating contest?

Well it just snowed yesterday so I guess I'm good :D

And I would win cuz I wouldn't let anyone else have any! All the Oreos are be MINEMINEMINE!!!!!!

ahem.


Coffee, tea, or me, sir?

[cloudy.thoughts]

Who would win an oreo eating contest?

If you promise to hold my hair after, then I'll have a go.

So, who do I have to beat?



EDIT:Ooo! have to keep up! (am I playing this right?)
Coffee, tea, or me, sir?
Me or you, Sir! Not me Sir. I Sir?

[McGoddess09]

If you promise to hold my hair after, then I'll have a go.

So, who do I have to beat?


Bookstore Escapee.. :devil:

What is it really good for?

[crazylegs]

Bookstore Escapee.. :devil:

What is it really good for?

Ridding Europe of fascism in the '40s

When do the clocks go forward again?

[BookstoreEscapee]

In a second...in a second...in a second......

What the hell was that???

[cloudy.thoughts]

In a second...in a second...in a second......

What the hell was that???
Sound like an echo in here.

What does one have to do to get service?

[McGoddess09]

Sound like an echo in here.

What does one have to do to get service?

Flash very naughty bits. It works EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Wow. Why am I so perverted?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Because you spend too much time here. :eyewaggle:

Can you beat the Impossible Quiz?

[RootedPhoenix]

*pulls out a baseball bat* *whackwhackwhack*
There. Quiz beaten.

Why can't you hug a bag of Doritos chips?

[Jack T. Chance]

Because you spend too much time here. :eyewaggle:

Can you beat the Impossible Quiz?Yes, but that's because beating it isn't actually impossible! It's just a bit unlikely! ;)

Why do fools fall in love?

EDIT:*pulls out a baseball bat* *whackwhackwhack*
There. Quiz beaten.

Why can't you hug a bag of Doritos chips?Oh, for the love of Gord...

How many times do I have to tell you people not to post when I'm typing my post? GOD! :rolleyes:

Anyway... Because they'd get all crushed and become crumbs! DUH! :p

Now, I ask again.... Why do fools fall in love?

[McGoddess09]

Yes, but that's because beating it isn't actually impossible! It's just a bit unlikely! ;)

Why do fools fall in love?

Anyway... Because they'd get all crushed and become crumbs! DUH! :p

Now, I ask again.... Why do fools fall in love?


Because they need someone to counter their foolishness.

Can you hear me?

[Slytovhand]

What?

Should I finish off this chocolate?

[McGoddess09]

What?

Should I finish off this chocolate?

Depends. How much sanity do you have left?

Why do I feel so old?

[cloudy.thoughts]

Why do I feel so old?
Tell me why, Judy, why?

[Bandit]

Tell me why, Judy, why?

Elvis told me.

So, why is sanity over-rated?

B

[BookstoreEscapee]

It's not, it's just that insanity is underrated.

Are you there God? It's me, Margaret.

[McGoddess09]

It's not, it's just that insanity is underrated.

Are you there God? It's me, Margaret.

God is not here right now. Please leave a message after the beep. BEEEP!

Daddy would you like some sausage?

[Jack T. Chance]

EDIT: JINX!!!

I REALLY wish people would stop doing that to me! :runaway:It's not, it's just that insanity is underrated.

Are you there God? It's me, Margaret.Nope, no God here today... just a less-than-amused Gord. Door's to your left! :p

Who is this God person, anyway? :confused:

[Amina516]

God is not here right now. Please leave a message after the beep. BEEEP!

Daddy would you like some sausage?


Im not daddy, but Hell yes...




What floats your boat?




BTW, McGoddess: You post the most perverted answers!!!!!!! LOL..you should get a trophy for that...

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Water.

Anybody else feel like stabbing the author of My Immortal in the neck?

[McGoddess09]

Water.

Anybody else feel like stabbing the author of My Immortal in the neck?

If I read the book,I might.

Will you be my sweet cherry pie?

(Lol Amina. I never used to be this bad. I think it's a combination of this community and my SO. But everyone should take it as a compliment. It means I'm comfortable with being myself.)

[Amina516]

If I read the book,I might.

Will you be my sweet cherry pie?

(Lol Amina. I never used to be this bad. I think it's a combination of this community and my SO. But everyone should take it as a compliment. It means I'm comfortable with being myself.)

Only if we can do what they do on the Discovery Channel.



What do I do with this bush? :p

[Jack T. Chance]

Water.

Anybody else feel like stabbing the author of My Immortal in the neck?Ummm... Sure, why not! :devil:

You can tell me why we're stabbing the author in the neck later on. You know, whenever. ;)

What is this fish doing in my ear?

EDIT: AAUUGH!!!! That's it, I quit! :mad:

:beam:

[McGoddess09]

Hey...umm...Jack. I already answered Irv's questions.

We need to stop doing this to each other. It's torture I tell you!!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Well, there's no question for me to answer, so...um...BOO!

Oh, wait, there is...I missed Jack's question in all the confusion...

Um...fish is brain food and it's trying to find the most direct route.

Does anyone know what "gazumped" means?

[Amina516]

Well, there's no question for me to answer, so...um...BOO!

Does anyone know what "gazumped" means?


ITs the sound that Godzilla makes when he starts humping the skyscrapers.


What do candy canes taste like?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Nothing, they have no tongues.

Is it howdy doody time?

[Amina516]

Nothing, they have no tongues.

Is it howdy doody time?

Lets check my toilet.



Whats my favorite cereal?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Chicken.

Could YOU be the one?

[McGoddess09]

For you,baby, I'll be anything.

Do you miss Jack already?

I do.

Come back Jack! The same thing JUST happened to me!

[BookstoreEscapee]

I'll never let go, Jack, I'll never let go!! :cry:



Will you be my friend?

[McGoddess09]

I sent you a request just today. :D

Will you walk with me in the garden of stars? The Universe? The galaxies AND Mars?

Cookies for reference!

Edit to add: I really liked Jack's questions and answers. He's funny.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I know, I accepted it :D

Sure I'll walk with you. But I guess I don't get cookies cuz I have no idea what you're talking about.

Do you think Jack will come back?

[Amina516]

I know, I accepted it :D

Sure I'll walk with you. But I guess I don't get cookies cuz I have no idea what you're talking about.

Do you think Jack will come back?

Jack needs to hit the road and not come back no mo, no mo, no mo, no mo.


Wheres my star?

[McGoddess09]

I know, I accepted it :D

Sure I'll walk with you. But I guess I don't get cookies cuz I have no idea what you're talking about.

Do you think Jack will come back?

I can only hope.

Will you bear my children?

(Bookstore, you still get cookies just because you are you :D )

EDIT TO ADD: Damn. Amina got there before me! My answer to her question is: I'm right here!

Now I shall ask again: Will you bear my children

[BookstoreEscapee]

On the walk of fame.

How many ways are there to leave your lover?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

85,347,812,233,856,250,804.

How did my head end up in this toilet?

[BookstoreEscapee]

85,347,812,233,856,250,804.

How did my head end up in this toilet?

The school bully.



Now I shall ask again: Will you bear my children

Well, there will have to be some medical intervention there but I think it could be arranged.

Who will donate the, uh, man juice?

[crazylegs]

The school bully.



Well, there will have to be some medical intervention there but I think it could be arranged.

Who will donate the, uh, man juice?

Batman!

Is sensible boring?

[CaroPhoenix]

Batman!

Is sensible boring?

oingo boingo!

Where is the pup named scooby doo going?

[Jack T. Chance]

Hey...umm...Jack. I already answered Irv's questions.

We need to stop doing this to each other. It's torture I tell you!!Agreed! :)Does anyone know what "gazumped" means?ITs the sound that Godzilla makes when he starts humping the skyscrapers.:spew:Do you miss Jack already?

I do.

Come back Jack! The same thing JUST happened to me!OK, I'm back. ;)I'll never let go, Jack, I'll never let go!! :cry:

Will you be my friend?Sure! :DEdit to add: I really liked Jack's questions and answers. He's funny.:o

Thanks, I do what I can! :)Do you think Jack will come back?Ummm... maybe. ;)Jack needs to hit the road and not come back no mo, no mo, no mo, no mo.Naughty girl! You go to my room! :eyewaggle:Where is the pup named scooby doo going?On the fire hydrant! :eek:

Where'd I put that rolled up newspaper? :confused:

[McGoddess09]

Up your butt and around the corner (Good to see you back,Jack) :D

Who is the deceiver of hearts?

[CaroPhoenix]

Up your butt and around the corner (Good to see you back,Jack) :D

Who is the deceiver of hearts?

Black Jack Partridge.

What needs to be turned off right now?

[MannersMakethMan]

Black Jack Partridge.

What needs to be turned off right now?

Everything that's on. Then turn on everything that's off.

Would you like to swing on a star?

[CaroPhoenix]

Everything that's on. Then turn on everything that's off.

Would you like to swing on a star?

I would, but I get carsick.

What shines in the sky all day?

[crazylegs]

I would, but I get carsick.

What shines in the sky all day?

That bloody faulty streetlamp outside my house.

Why coffee?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Cuz mud is too muddy.

Who wants to happy dance with me now that Jack's back? :bounce:

[crazylegs]

Cuz mud is too muddy.

Who wants to happy dance with me now that Jack's back? :bounce:

Who now?

Why did I forget to record CSI?

[McGoddess09]

Because you are a silly goose like that?

Why did I have a weird dream about my Algebra teacher last night?
(Basically, the dream was about him throwing a graduation party at his house for my class. I gave him a hug and said "Thanks for being such a wonderful teacher." And then he kissed me. Now, he's in his mid to late twenties, so he's not old. lol)

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Because you're auditioning for a role in a new Hot For Teacher music video?

Why am I so ronery?

[Jack T. Chance]

Because you're auditioning for a role in a new Hot For Teacher music video?

Why am I so ronery?Because you've somehow developed a psychic connection to Kim Jong-il?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Mighty Morphin Power Rangers?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Because you've somehow developed a psychic connection to Kim Jong-il?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Mighty Morphin Power Rangers?

Chip and Dale's Rescue Rangers.

Why does Diet Dr. Pepper+Jameson Irish Whiskey=nomnomnom?

[XCashier]

Because ANYTHING with Irish Whiskey=nomnomnom!

Why does my cat trill instead of meow?

[MannersMakethMan]

Because ANYTHING with Irish Whiskey=nomnomnom!

Why does my cat trill instead of meow?

Too much birdseed.

Would you care to dance?

[McGoddess09]

Too much birdseed.

Would you care to dance?

Why,yes,my dear. *belly dance*

Is it really amore when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie?

[crazylegs]

Why,yes,my dear. *belly dance*

Is it really amore when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie?

Not really.

Why am I squiffy?

[McGoddess09]

Not really.

Why am I squiffy?

Because...you are? (What is squiffy? It sounds like a delightful word!!:D )

What will it take?

[crazylegs]

Because...you are? (What is squiffy? It sounds like a delightful word!!:D )

What will it take?

(Squiffy is merrily drunk)

Three 10p pieces and a pound coin

Why did my phone go off early this morning?

[McGoddess09]

(Squiffy is merrily drunk)

Three 10p pieces and a pound coin

Why did my phone go off early this morning?

Because the aliens wanted it too.

Oh squiffy is a wonderful word! I like it!!

Why is it so cold here?

[Plaidman]

Cause I'm not there to keep you warm?


How horribly is McGoddess SO going to hurt Plaidman after the fact?

[crazylegs]

Cause I'm not there to keep you warm?


How horribly is McGoddess SO going to hurt Plaidman after the fact?

Words cannot describe how badly. Therefore I can't tell you! :p

Will there be a new CD out this year that'll blow me away?

[McGoddess09]

Words cannot describe how badly. Therefore I can't tell you! :p

Will there be a new CD out this year that'll blow me away?

You would have to look far and wide into non-mainstream.

BTW,Plaidman, you are a fellow Batman fan, he would invite you!

Where oh where did my little dog go?

[crazylegs]

You would have to look far and wide into non-mainstream.

BTW,Plaidman, you are a fellow Batman fan, he would invite you!

Where oh where did my little dog go?

(Ain't that the truth!)

He went into the little hole under your seat.

[CaroPhoenix]

(Ain't that the truth!)

He went into the little hole under your seat.

And the answer to crazylegs' non-existent question:

Badda-bing!

Why didn't crazylegs leave a question in his post?

[McGoddess09]

Because he was distracted by a shiny.


Why do people do what they do?

[DesignFox]

Because he was distracted by a shiny.


Why do people do what they do?

I have actually stopped wanting to know.

Whose line is it, anyway?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Mine.

What should I do, now that pink has turned to blue?

[MannersMakethMan]

If the test should ye fail, for a doctor set sail.

What are the odds?

[crazylegs]

If the test should ye fail, for a doctor set sail.

What are the odds?

14,985,329 to one.

Who knows what I'm thinking?

[McGoddess09]

14,985,329 to one.

Who knows what I'm thinking?

Sex.

Why am I so intune to crazylegs's thoughts?

[Jack T. Chance]

Sex.

Why am I so intune to crazylegs's thoughts?'Cause you're soul mates? ;)

Why'd it have to be the coldest days of the season on my days off?

[DesignFox]

Why'd it have to be the coldest days of the season on my days off?

Because winter is the EVIL.

Do you wanna be my girl?

[McGoddess09]

Because winter is the EVIL.

Do you wanna be my girl?

Sure! But you and a couple of other people need to work a schedule out. :lol:

I jest. I jest.

I'm going lingerie shopping with my friend,Cupcake. What should I get?

[Mike Taylor]

A burlap bag and a chaingun.

Why did the dinosaurs die?

[Jack T. Chance]

Sure! But you and a couple of other people need to work a schedule out. :lol:

I jest. I jest.

I'm going lingerie shopping with my friend,Cupcake. What should I get?Something appropriate for a 17-year old, of course! ;)

Who do I have to kill to get medical science to cure the common cold?

[McGoddess09]

Something appropriate for a 17-year old, of course! ;)

Who do I have to kill to get medical science to cure the common cold?

A couple of oranges. Poor little oranges... :(

(What WOULD be appropriate these days :lol: )

Why can't we be together,embrace it?

[Jack T. Chance]

A couple of oranges. Poor little oranges... :(

(What WOULD be appropriate these days :lol: )

Why can't we be together,embrace it?Call me after you turn 18! :eyewaggle: ;)

(What would be appropriate? Something that doesn't make you look like a stripper! :p)

Who's the dumb ass that decided clothing stores should put their Spring lines out in JANUARY during the coldest weather of the year, when people might actually NEED to buy more winter clothing?!? :confused:

[CaroPhoenix]

Call me after you turn 18! :eyewaggle: ;)

(What would be appropriate? Something that doesn't make you look like a stripper! :p)

Who's the dumb ass that decided clothing stores should put their Spring lines out in JANUARY during the coldest weather of the year, when people might actually NEED to buy more winter clothing?!? :confused:

The Snow Queen as she is an evil woman.

Why shouldn't we bite our friends?

[crazylegs]

The Snow Queen as she is an evil woman.

Why shouldn't we bite our friends?

We might spread Rabies.

Who are/were the infected?

[McGoddess09]

We might spread Rabies.

Who are/were the infected?

Those damn dirty apes.

(BTW Jack, I found something really cuuute!! Plus I bought knee high socks and a cute hat!)

What does it take to be number one?

[crazylegs]

Those damn dirty apes.

(BTW Jack, I found something really cuuute!! Plus I bought knee high socks and a cute hat!)

What does it take to be number one?

Take 2 from 3.

Should I change my job?

[McGoddess09]

Take 2 from 3.

Should I change my job?

It depends on the alternative choice. Benefits,pay..blah blah blah.

Whoop is it really there?

[crazylegs]

It depends on the alternative choice. Benefits,pay..blah blah blah.

Whoop is it really there?

No, it contracted pneumonia and is now just 'wh'

How many peas in a pod?

[Amina516]

No, it contracted pneumonia and is now just 'wh'

How many peas in a pod?

Infinity times Pi. And I dont even like peas......:(


When will my pizza get here?

[MannersMakethMan]

Infinity times Pi. And I dont even like peas......:(


When will my pizza get here?

As soon as the delivery driver has earned enough money performing somersaults in the street to release his bike.

If I seek, will I find?

[BookstoreEscapee]

You'll find...something, I'm sure...:eek:

Why did my internet not work all night last night?

[Jack T. Chance]

Why did my internet not work all night last night?I'm afraid that was my fault, luv. I accidentally tripped the master reset for the interwebz, and that reboot takes AWHILE. I mean, you might think Windows is slow to boot up, but that's just peanuts to the whole of the interwebz rebooting! :sorry:

Why is my BlackBerry making the words I type invisible? :confused:

[Amina516]

I'm afraid that was my fault, luv. I accidentally tripped the master reset for the interwebz, and that reboot takes AWHILE. I mean, you might think Windows is slow to boot up, but that's just peanuts to the whole of the interwebz rebooting! :sorry:

Why is my BlackBerry making the words I type invisible? :confused:

B/c they are a group of secret super powered letters who will run rampant through our lives and misspell words when no one is looking!!! NOOOOOOOOOO!


Why doesnt any one text me anymore? :(

[BookstoreEscapee]

Sorry, lost yer number...:o

How does the gum get inside a Blo-pop?

[DesignFox]

Sorry, lost yer number...:o

How does the gum get inside a Blo-pop?

The Oompa Loompas inject it with a magical bubble gun.

Why do I get emotional at this time of the month? :o

[BookstoreEscapee]

The weekend is so short, it's just sad... :(

Do you prefer Caturday or Bunday?

[XCashier]

Caturday RULZ! Everyone can has cheezbrgrs! :p

Why doesn't anything make sense?

[RootedPhoenix]

You took the wrong pills. :p

Why am I still up?

[Nurian]

The chloroform hasn't taken effect yet.

Is all country music the same?

[CaroPhoenix]

The chloroform hasn't taken effect yet.

Is all country music the same?

If it wasn't, how could you tell it was country music?

Why am I here?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Why am I here?

Well, when two people really love each other....


Wait, was that not what you meant?

(ps I love your avatar. you might like this (http://graphjam.com/2009/01/14/song-chart-memes-reasons-people-hate-twilight/). :D)

[CaroPhoenix]

Well, when two people really love each other....


Wait, was that not what you meant?

(ps I love your avatar. you might like this (http://graphjam.com/2009/01/14/song-chart-memes-reasons-people-hate-twilight/). :D)

What I meant is not the meaning of the thought of what you thought that I meant to be.

There, is it clearer now? :p

[BookstoreEscapee]

Uh...sure...:headscratch:

Why do I procrastinate?

[crazylegs]

Uh...sure...:headscratch:

Why do I procrastinate?

You don't.

But then maybe you do, on the other hand you may not...

How many days until restdays?

[McGoddess09]

You don't.

But then maybe you do, on the other hand you may not...

How many days until restdays?

4?

Is that really the way of love?

[Jack T. Chance]

You don't.

But then maybe you do, on the other hand you may not...

How many days until restdays?42! (I swear, that answer just works for EVERYTHING! No wonder it's the Ultimate Answer!) :D

Metallica, or AC/DC?

EDIT: Oh, for the love of Gord! Gazumped again! :eek:

I thought we agreed not to do that to each other anymore? :confused:

[Amina516]

42! (I swear, that answer just works for EVERYTHING! No wonder it's the Ultimate Answer!) :D

Metallica, or AC/DC?

EDIT: Oh, for the love of Gord! Gazumped again! :eek:

I thought we agreed not to do that to each other anymore? :confused:

Gazumping is the way of life, therefore you must submit...or acquit.

If you are what you say you are, are you a superstar?

[DesignFox]

Gazumping is the way of life, therefore you must submit...or acquit.

If you are what you say you are, are you a superstar?

Only if you say so. :p

Why did mommy make me eat my M&M's? (*twitch* I hated that song in grade school)

[McGoddess09]

Only if you say so. :p

Why did mommy make me eat my M&M's? (*twitch* I hated that song in grade school)

:eek: My mom tried to get me NOT to eat M&M's!

Can we build this world together?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

:eek: My mom tried to get me NOT to eat M&M's!

Can we build this world together?

Why not? We built this city.

What is the meaning of life?

[CaroPhoenix]

Why not? We built this city.

What is the meaning of life?

42 42ft high tangerines.

Why a spoon cousin?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Cuz forks are too pointy.

How much is that doggie in the window?

[CaroPhoenix]

Cuz forks are too pointy.

How much is that doggie in the window?

It's too rich for my blood.

The superbowl? Why not the superplate?

[XCashier]

Gotta use something that'll hold liquid when all the beer you drank comes back to haunt you... :puke:

Could this be magic?

[Jack T. Chance]

Gotta use something that'll hold liquid when all the beer you drank comes back to haunt you... :puke:

Could this be magic?That depends. Did something or someone disappear? Did someone get cut in half, then miraculously healed? Did someone disappear from one place, then reappear in another?

Who watches the Watchmen?

[CaroPhoenix]

That depends. Did something or someone disappear? Did someone get cut in half, then miraculously healed? Did someone disappear from one place, then reappear in another?

Who watches the Watchmen?

The rock of love groupies.

Does Brett Michaels have real hair?

[McGoddess09]

The rock of love groupies.

Does Brett Michaels have real hair?

It looks like it. It looked like it when I got to see him in person this summer. When it got quiet at the concert, I shouted at the top of my lungs "I LOVE YOU BRETT MICHAELS!!" :D

Why is it ALWAYS midnight in stories?

[Jack T. Chance]

It looks like it. It looked like it when I got to see him in person this summer. When it got quiet at the concert, I shouted at the top of my lungs "I LOVE YOU BRETT MICHAELS!!" :D

Why is it ALWAYS midnight in stories?'Cause Midnight is when all the fun stuff happens! :D

Why me?

[Trayol]

Because, if not you then me; and I don't want it to be me. :D

Who are you?

[MannersMakethMan]

Ask me another...

Where's your head at?

[Broomjockey]

Where's your head at?

On top of my shoulders!

What is the co-efficient of friction when compared to the fluid dynamics of a homeostatic solution?

[MannersMakethMan]

What is the co-efficient of friction when compared to the fluid dynamics of a homeostatic solution?

It becomes a different mu - more like a moo

What happens if you let epsilon be less than zero?

[Amina516]

It becomes a different mu - more like a moo

What happens if you let epsilon be less than zero?

Huh?!



What?

[Broomjockey]

What?

Disco.

When?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Disco.

When?

Before.

Now where did I put that thingamagig?

[Jack T. Chance]

Before.

Now where did I put that thingamagig?You stuck it in the Whatchamacallit! ;)

Who to the what now?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

You stuck it in the Whatchamacallit! ;)

Who to the what now?

Opposite of who did what to who

Whose thingamabob?

[MannersMakethMan]

Opposite of who did what to who

Whose thingamabob?

Old whatshisface.

Did I have that a second ago?

[McGoddess09]

Maybe you did.

What are you doing in my house?

[Jack T. Chance]

Maybe you did.

What are you doing in my house?Ummm... why... nothing, nothing at all! I'm not actually here! You're dreaming! Yeah, that's the ticket! :devil:

Why the long face?

[crazylegs]

Ummm... why... nothing, nothing at all! I'm not actually here! You're dreaming! Yeah, that's the ticket! :devil:

Why the long face?

I'm a horse.

What can I do on my rest days?

[McGoddess09]

I'm a horse.

What can I do on my rest days?

Get busy...if you know what I mean :devil: You'll get plenty of rest after that.


Why isn't it 6 yet? I want to go to Tattoo's house and have a bit of rum....

[BookstoreEscapee]

Why isn't it 6 yet? I want to go to Tattoo's house and have a bit of rum....

Because it's only 6:30.

The plane? The plane?

[CaroPhoenix]

Because it's only 6:30.

The plane? The plane?

No! It's Superman! :D

Why is all the rum gone?

[Jack T. Chance]

No! It's Superman! :D

Why is all the rum gone?Because you gals drank it all! :p

Mass Effect, or Fallout 3?

[CaroPhoenix]

Because you gals drank it all! :p

Mass Effect, or Fallout 3?

Tetris for the NES. :p

If my ears get so clogged, are they going to just fall off when they realize I can't use them no more?

[XCashier]

Well no, you need a place to wear your earrings!

If a tree falls in the forest and there is no one around to hear it, does it make a sound?

[CaroPhoenix]

Well no, you need a place to wear your earrings!

If a tree falls in the forest and there is no one around to hear it, does it make a sound?

Only if it's a female tree & is cursing her stupid husband who only cares about himself and can't do anything to help the tree family and umm ... :ashamed:

What was I talking about?

[Jack T. Chance]

Only if it's a female tree & is cursing her stupid husband who only cares about himself and can't do anything to help the tree family and umm ... :ashamed:

What was I talking about?Shoes! :D

If a man speaks, and there's no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? :confused:

[BookstoreEscapee]

I don't know, I couldn't hear you...

Are you listening to me?!

[XCashier]

Oh, sorry, I wasn't listening.

What'd you say?

[CaroPhoenix]

Oh, sorry, I wasn't listening.

What'd you say?

Live long and in infinite combinations while the dark force is going along with Hi Ho Silver!

What is wrong with the sentence above?

[BookstoreEscapee]

There should be 43 exclamation points and a couple of 1s.

Who da' man?

[Amina516]

There should be 43 exclamation points and a couple of 1s.

Who da' man?

the one with the master plan.


Why does my underwear seem to be disappearing? (no, seriously it does!!)

[XCashier]

Your dryer is hungry.

Who is Number One?

[DesignFox]

Who is Number One?

He doesn't exist anymore.

How could I forget the question I was gonna ask?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Uhhh....

What?

[Jack T. Chance]

Uhhh....

What?Chicken butt! :lol:

Guess why?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Pie in the sky.

How big is the universe?

[CaroPhoenix]

Pie in the sky.

How big is the universe?

Big enough to swallow everyone's underwear.

Why does my underwear fall down when I'm around a certain male friend?

[DesignFox]

Pie in the sky.

How big is the universe?

Our minds are too feeble to comprehend it.

Why a yellow brick road?

DOH. Gazumped!

To answer Rum's question...

because gravity just takes over!

So. Why a yellow brick road?

[Becks]

I'm wearing pants.

:D

Are we there yet?

[crazylegs]

I'm wearing pants.

:D

Are we there yet?

Nope, infact we should have turned left at Aberdeen, therefore we've now entered the arctic circle and will never arrive at our preplanned destination.

How was it for you?

[CaroPhoenix]

Nope, infact we should have turned left at Aberdeen, therefore we've now entered the arctic circle and will never arrive at our preplanned destination.

How was it for you?

Can't remember a darn thing.

What what?

[Amina516]

Can't remember a darn thing.

What what?

Chicken butt!

You know why?

[Jack T. Chance]

Chicken butt!

You know why?Chicken Pot Pie! :D

(I'll bet you thought I was going to say "Chicken Thigh", didn't you? Eh? Eh? ;))

Guess who?

[crazylegs]

Chicken Pot Pie! :D

(I'll bet you thought I was going to say "Chicken Thigh", didn't you? Eh? Eh? ;))

Guess who?

Nobody's here.

How'd I do that?

[CaroPhoenix]

Nobody's here.

How'd I do that?

it wasn't you but your twin brother.

Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?

[DesignFox]

Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?

I wouldn't know. I don't recycle gum.

Who wants some 151 rum with me? :drink:

[Jack T. Chance]

I wouldn't know. I don't recycle gum.

Who wants some 151 rum with me? :drink:idrinkarum, naturally! SHE'S the reason the rum's always gone! ;)

Guyver I, Guyver II, or Guyver III?

[CaroPhoenix]

idrinkarum, naturally! SHE'S the reason the rum's always gone! ;)

Guyver I, Guyver II, or Guyver III?

RUM! And lots of it. :p

Can you catch it on your tonsils?

[McGoddess09]

RUM! And lots of it. :p

Can you catch it on your tonsils?

I can catch many things on my tonsils ;)

What do you desire?

[Jack T. Chance]

I can catch many things on my tonsils ;)

What do you desire?What a loaded question! :eyewaggle:

Let's see here... one thing that I desire is...

the third Guyver unit! I want to be a bio-boosted superhero! :D

What do you want?

[BookstoreEscapee]

I want an ice cream cone.

Did anything else happen in the world today?

[Jack T. Chance]

I want an ice cream cone.Now THAT'S a good answer! Simple, to the point... and it's highly likely you'll GET what you want. :cool:Did anything else happen in the world today?Undoubtedly... Not that the liberal news media will breathe a word of it. :rolleyes:

Why can't the politicians go back to being good men worthy of our support, men like JFK and Jimmy Carter and Ronald Reagan? :confused:

--Jack (Who doesn't like modern politicians.)

[crazylegs]

Now THAT'S a good answer! Simple, to the point... and it's highly likely you'll GET what you want. :cool:Undoubtedly... Not that the liberal news media will breathe a word of it. :rolleyes:

Why can't the politicians go back to being good men worthy of our support, men like JFK and Jimmy Carter and Ronald Reagan? :confused:

--Jack (Who doesn't like modern politicians.)

The global turnip conspiracy theory.

Why can't I ever roll the sleeves up on my work shirts properly?

[CaroPhoenix]

The global turnip conspiracy theory.

Why can't I ever roll the sleeves up on my work shirts properly?

Because you got the special shirts with the unrollable sleeves.

If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make foghorns out of?

[Jack T. Chance]

Because you got the special shirts with the unrollable sleeves.

If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make foghorns out of?Foghorn Leghorn! Didn't you ever wonder what happened to him? ;)

People's Court or Judge Judy?

[hinakiba777]

Foghorn Leghorn! Didn't you ever wonder what happened to him? ;)

People's Court or Judge Judy?
KANGEROO COURT!


Why do they call being hoarse having "a frog in your throat"?

[McGoddess09]

KANGEROO COURT!


Why do they call being hoarse having "a frog in your throat"?

It's a conspiracy to encourage people to eat frogs rather than horses.

Why am I craving bacon?

[crazylegs]

It's a conspiracy to encourage people to eat frogs rather than horses.

Why am I craving bacon?

You live on a pig farm?

What to do on rest days?

[CaroPhoenix]

You live on a pig farm?

What to do on rest days?

Square dancing!

Can you heave it left and right?

[DesignFox]

Square dancing!

Can you heave it left and right?

Nope. you can only do that up and down.

Why did the old woman swallow a fly?

[evileatinggrasshopper]

Why did the old woman swallow a fly?

A. She didn't, it was the frog in her throat.

Q. What are we doing tomorrow night Brain?

[XCashier]

"The same thing we do every night, Pinky, try to take over the world!" :devil:

Why did I post a right answer instead of a wrong answer?

[hinakiba777]

"The same thing we do every night, Pinky, try to take over the world!" :devil:

Why did I post a right answer instead of a wrong answer?

It's time for Animaniacs, and we're zanny to the max!

Who do you love?

[CaroPhoenix]

It's time for Animaniacs, and we're zanny to the max!

Who do you love?

Myself!

Should I wake my sleeping husband?

[crazylegs]

Myself!

Should I wake my sleeping husband?

Prefereably with a bucket of ice cold water! :angel:

How many hops, skips and jumps?

[hinakiba777]

Prefereably with a bucket of ice cold water! :angel:

How many hops, skips and jumps?

50 hops, 1/2 skip, and 99.9 jumps!

will you be my Fwend!?

[CaroPhoenix]

50 hops, 1/2 skip, and 99.9 jumps!

will you be my Fwend!?

Only during wabbit season.

Why hasn't the bus delivered my child yet? :cry:

[MannersMakethMan]

Only during wabbit season.

Why hasn't the bus delivered my child yet? :cry:

Either incorrect postage or an illegible address.

Why do the simple things seem to take the longest just recently?

[Amina516]

Either incorrect postage or an illegible address.

Why do the simple things seem to take the longest just recently?

B/c they have to go half past a monkeys ass and a quarter to his *ahem*

What kind of cheese is the best cheese?

[CaroPhoenix]

B/c they have to go half past a monkeys ass and a quarter to his *ahem*

What kind of cheese is the best cheese?

The 3 Stooges!

Do green beans want to join the party in my tummy?

[Amina516]

The 3 Stooges!

Do green beans want to join the party in my tummy?

No, b/c theyre not so yummy, so yummy yummy yummy.


Why do I watch kid shows in my off time?

[DesignFox]

Why do I watch kid shows in my off time?

You are reliving your childhood.

Why can't I be perfect?

[Jack T. Chance]

You are reliving your childhood.

Why can't I be perfect?Because the GODS are imperfect, and we were made in their image! ;)

Commuter car, or luxury car?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Neither, sorry, you get a golf cart with a weak battery.

Do your ears hang low?

[XCashier]

Only when I wear extremely heavy earrings.

Why doesn't the world make sense anymore?

[Becks]

Ooooh, look!!! Shiney things!!!


Why isn't Rummy writing in purple in this thread?

[CaroPhoenix]

Ooooh, look!!! Shiney things!!!


Why isn't Rummy writing in purple in this thread?

OMG! I am ... you can't see it 'cos you don't have your purple-tinted glasses on. :p

Who has time to spend with me?

[McGoddess09]

OMG! I am ... you can't see it 'cos you don't have your purple-tinted glasses on. :p

Who has time to spend with me?

Oh I do. The things we could do, the havoc we could wreak, the worlds we could conquer....

Is foul really fair?

[MannersMakethMan]

Oh I do. The things we could do, the havoc we could wreak, the worlds we could conquer....

Is foul really fair?

Fair is foul, and foul is fair, hover on fog and filthy air.

Why on Earth do you remember some things?

[CaroPhoenix]

Fair is foul, and foul is fair, hover on fog and filthy air.

Why on Earth do you remember some things?

Because the Brain Pixies make you memorize random things at all times when you sleep.

Who can play the hooptie horn?

[BookstoreEscapee]

My cat.

Why is Pablo making that noise? :lol:

[Jack T. Chance]

My cat.

Why is Pablo making that noise? :lol:'Cuz he's doing that thing! ;)

Who wants to be my Valentine? :confused:

[hinakiba777]

'Cuz he's doing that thing! ;)

Who wants to be my Valentine? :confused:

The Miner from My Bloody Valentine in 3D


Why does the flu love me?

[Jack T. Chance]

The Miner from My Bloody Valentine in 3DUGH! No thanks! The CORRECT answer was the lovely Rhona Mitra, star of Underworld: Rise of the Lycans! :love:Why does the flu love me?Because you're so lovable! ;)

Why does Cupid hate me? What did I ever do to the li'l bugger? :confused:

[BookstoreEscapee]

He needs a fresh diaper.

Why doesn't my brain work when I need it to?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

He needs a fresh diaper.

Why doesn't my brain work when I need it to?

Because it has a mind of its own

Anyone know what's going to happen next week on Lost?

[Bandit]

Anyone know what's going to happen next week on Lost?

They will find Elvis.


Can someone PLEASE turn up the heat?

B

[DGoddessChardonnay]

They will find Elvis.


Can someone PLEASE turn up the heat?

B

Nekkid or not?

If they find Elvis next week on Lost, will they find Amelia Earhart by the end of next season too?

[CaroPhoenix]

Nekkid or not?

If they find Elvis next week on Lost, will they find Amelia Earhart by the end of next season too?

Sure, why not? She's living with Elvis, JFK and Marilyn Monroe and they haven't aged a day since they "died". ;)

What is the clue?

[MannersMakethMan]

Sure, why not? She's living with Elvis, JFK and Marilyn Monroe and they haven't aged a day since they "died". ;)

What is the clue?

The clue is in the question

Is it too late?

[CaroPhoenix]

The clue is in the question

Is it too late?

Nope, but it's not quite too early enough either.

What is the most important job?

[McGoddess09]

Nope, but it's not quite too early enough either.

What is the most important job?

Being a child. They are our future.


Why are breakfast foods so yummy?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Being a child. They are our future.


Why are breakfast foods so yummy?


Because they're not just for breakfast anymore

Why am I bored on a Saturday night?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Because all the action happens at 4:36 on Sunday morning.

Why is my throat so dry?

[Chanlin]

Because all the action happens at 4:36 on Sunday morning.

Why is my throat so dry?

Well if you would stop eating towels you wouldn't have this problem.

Who are you?

[DesignFox]

Well if you would stop eating towels you wouldn't have this problem.

Who are you?

Don't you think you should tell me who YOU are first?

How many drugs are the makers of Mario Brothers on?

[CaroPhoenix]

Don't you think you should tell me who YOU are first?

How many drugs are the makers of Mario Brothers on?

None - they're just sappy like that.

Why watch UFC?

[BookstoreEscapee]

Cuz someone kicked me in the head.

What's that beeping?

[Broomjockey]

What's that beeping?

Your face is ready.

Why do hot dogs come in packs of 10, but buns in 12?

[MannersMakethMan]

Your face is ready.

Why do hot dogs come in packs of 10, but buns in 12?

So you'll have a nice pair of buns left over

What's the answer to number 1?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Your face is ready.

Why do hot dogs come in packs of 10, but buns in 12?

'Cause burgers are better . . . unless you're a cow.

Does air have a smell to it?

[crazylegs]

'Cause burgers are better . . . unless you're a cow.

Does air have a smell to it?

Always, but only if you're super special.

How do you "Walk this way, talk this way"?

[Broomjockey]

Always, but only if you're super special.

How do you "Walk this way, talk this way"?

*tosses head, struts off, and uses a British accent* *guards and Robin Hood, shrug, and imitate*

How many peanuts can you fit in a phone booth?

[crazylegs]

*tosses head, struts off, and uses a British accent* *guards and Robin Hood, shrug, and imitate*

How many peanuts can you fit in a phone booth?

1billion

How many eggs in my kitchen?

[CaroPhoenix]

1billion

How many eggs in my kitchen?

Enough to make a cake that will be left in the rain and we'll never have this feeling again.

What is that feeling?

[hinakiba777]

Enough to make a cake that will be left in the rain and we'll never have this feeling again.

What is that feeling?

Unadulterated Loating for your hair, your voice, your clothing.

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?