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raine_naoe
12-13-2008, 07:18 AM
lets start out with a couple more stories from the library.

audio-visual complaints
as a library worker at the community college we got shuffled around to all aspects of it, including delivering audio-visual material to teachers. this was always the worst part of the job to me. the tv carts are really heavy, and most of them are really old so the wheels don't work right all the time, and tend to be squeaky. the pc carts are even worse. they roll better, but they don't want to stop rolling, or turn.

so yeah, if i'm bringing a tv cart to your class room and i'm running a bit late, but still get it to you before you actually start your class, don't glare and me and say "Finally!" really angrily. because as i was pulling it out of the elavator, those stupid old wheels might have turned sideways suddenly and fallen down in the crack between the floor and the elevator, leaving me know choice but to physically lift the cart up enough to get it out. not easy for anyone, especially not for a weakling like me.

if you see me in the hallway pushing a tv or pc cart, please get to one side. don't continue to walk lined up taking up the whole hallway, and please, please, don't sit on the floor with your legs stretched out across the hall.

and finally, if you are a teacher that ordered a tv cart brought down to your room, please DO NOT decide you'd rather teach your class in the room across the hall, move the tv their, and inform nobody that you did so.


back to the call center again.

congratulations, you manage to hurt my utilization score
this is also during the promotion of buy $100 dollars worth of stuff, get $20 dollars off. anything you pay for with a gift card doesn't count, because you already bought the gift card from us. so this lady had $100 dollars, but wants to use a gift card that brings the total below the hundred.
me: I'm sorry, ma'am. after the gift card your merchandise total is below $100. amounts paid for my a gift card don't count for the promotion.
sc: (testily) but i got the gift card as a refund.
me: a refund?
sc: yeah, for an item i never got.
me: okay, may i please place you on hold for a couple minutes
sc: fine.
me: *calls up a resource coordinator* I have a customer trying to use a gift card towards the $20 dollars off promotion and she says it was from a refund *reads off card number to the rc*
rc: okay, well...looks like we sent her something at the beginning of the year... she said she never recieved it so we sent her a gift card...called back and said she never got the gift card, so we sent another one...but it looks like the original purchase was paid for with a gift card to begin with...she had a $100 dollar gift card and used part of it on a $40 pair of boots...that's why we sent her a gift card as a refund. if she presses the issue though, just tell her you'll put a note on there for her.
me: okay, thank you. Thank you for holding ma'am. it seems that the item you never recieved was also originally purchased with a gift card-
sc: not all of it but fine. whatever. *click*

boat covers
guy calls in, places an order, then after awhile of thinking we have the following exchange.
guy: do you have boat covers?
me: (i know i never said which store i work for, but if you knew you'd understand why this question is a little silly) yes sir, we do.
guy: i'd like a boat cover.
me: (looking at pages of boat covers that we offer, groaning inside) do you know what type specifically you'd like?
guy: i have a boat cover, a polyester one, but it stains my boat. i got a white bass boat and it leaves blue stains on it. i don't want a polyester one, i want one made out of a material.
me: sir, i'm sorry but all of our boat covers are made out of polyester or vinyl, and polyester is better quality than the vinyl ones.
guy: well, i don't want one that stains.
me: okay sir, can you tell me the dimensions of your boat?
guy: its xx feet long.
me: okay. can you tell me the beam width and if it's a single or dual console?
guy: huh?
me: do you know the beam width?
guy: no.
me: is it a single console or a dual console?
guy: a what?
me: does it have one seat at the front or two.
guy: oh, one.
me: okay. well, to find a boat cover that fits best i really should have your width, are you sure you don't know it?
guy: one minute...it's xxx
me: okay, thank you. (goes through and names off three high quality uber-waterproof boat covers)
guy: actually, i see some here in the catalog, will these fit my boat?
me: can i have the item number of one of them?
guy: xx-xxx-xxx-xx
me: okay, there is one here that would fit your boat.
guy: i don't want it to stain my boat.
me: (it's a 300 something dollar boat cover, if it stains your boat you're doing something wrong there.) well, sir...if you're really that paranoid you could get it in white instead of blue.
guy: that'd be less likely to stain?
me: well, if it does stain, you probably won't notice it since it'd be the same color as your boat, but it really shouldn't stain anyway.
guy: okay, add that to my order.

size/color code
if you read the item number and i ask if there is a size or color code, you don't have to tell me the actual size and color of the item and then tell me the code. and you certainly don't have to respond in a snotty voice "That is the item number for such and such color." great, lovely, and what's the SIZE?
and if you've got a list of 30 some items you're ordering, and on every single one i ask you for the size/color code, please catch on and start saying it with the rest of the item number. thank you.

awkward
me: hello, this is mandy. how may i help you?
ag:hello mandy, umm...this is...kinda awkward, but do you have any camo underwear for ladies, like panties?
me: one moment, let me check that for you. okay sir, we don have some ladies underwear available in green white or pink camo.
ag: are they just regular panties or are they thongs?
me: they're just regular panties sir.
ag: okay.
me: would you like the item number for them sir?
ag: no thank you, that's fine. *click*
me: ...ookay...

Nurian
12-13-2008, 07:24 AM
Hehe, the last one is classic. I once had a caller on a thrid shift that would never speak to any males. When he got a female, he'd usually say "You must have pretty feet" or "I want to suck on your toes".

otakuneko
12-13-2008, 08:51 AM
awkward 867


Edited for amusement. :D

About the gift card thing - don'tcha wish the guys who come up with the fine-print gotchas would be forced to deal with the suckage they inevitably create? :devil:

raine_naoe
12-13-2008, 09:15 AM
Edited for amusement. :D

About the gift card thing - don'tcha wish the guys who come up with the fine-print gotchas would be forced to deal with the suckage they inevitably create? :devil:

meh, it makes sense. i mean, it'd sorta almost be the same as ordering a product, then wanting to return it, get another one, and get an extra $20.

and yes, I was thinking of Gravekeeper ^_^

Shironu-Akaineko
12-13-2008, 12:16 PM
When he got a female, he'd usually say "You must have pretty feet" or "I want to suck on your toes".

"oh, it would do my bunions a world of good!"

calulu
12-13-2008, 12:51 PM
Meeh, I used to get The Tickle Guy every Saturday morning like clockworth. Arount 10 est he'd be working his fetish, call up the company, act like he was going to order and then start talking about tickling. He got me the first time but never again.

Pink camo panty fetish. That's a new one on me and I thought I had all the fetish guys, the toe sucker guy, the tickle guy, the pancake guy, the big ass guy, the foot sniffer, etc, etc...

Imogene
12-13-2008, 05:04 PM
awkward
me: hello, this is mandy. how may i help you?
ag:hello mandy, umm...this is...kinda awkward, but do you have any camo underwear for ladies, like panties?
me: one moment, let me check that for you. okay sir, we don have some ladies underwear available in green white or pink camo.

Oooh! Get the green! They hide the stains better...

crazylegs
12-13-2008, 09:09 PM
Oooh! Get the green! They hide the stains better...

Uh, I hate to break it to you but if you're needing to hide Green stains something is seriously wrong! :lol:

karma_gypsy
12-14-2008, 12:07 AM
Oooh! Get the green! They hide the stains better...

You could just say that it's a part of the pattern!

ralerin
12-14-2008, 03:30 AM
:eek: pink camo underwear? Gravekeeper's going to have a fit.

Jester
12-14-2008, 05:29 PM
Uh, I hate to break it to you but if you're needing to hide Green stains something is seriously wrong! :lol:

What? You've never gotten grass stains on your underwear?

Not that *I* ever have, of course. :whistle:















That would require wearing underwear.

crazylegs
12-14-2008, 05:33 PM
What? You've never gotten grass stains on your underwear?

Never on my underwear... :D

Nurian
12-15-2008, 02:06 PM
Pink camo panties...
















For the girl who goes commando!
:rimshot:

Nyoibo
12-16-2008, 03:17 AM
Oooh! Get the green! They hide the stains better...

Urine sould only be green if you're Mr. Spock.

Chromatix
12-16-2008, 09:27 PM
I thought it was Vulcan *blood* that was green. I suspect there is no official word on... excreta.

Nurian
12-16-2008, 10:03 PM
I thought it was Vulcan *blood* that was green. I suspect there is no official word on... excreta.

Wait, if it were green, wouldn't that mean he has blood in his...urea?

Pagan
12-16-2008, 10:17 PM
And yet another thread completely and utterly derailed! :lol:

Meeh, I used to get The Tickle Guy every Saturday morning like clockworth.

We used to get the crop top/hip hugger/belly button ring guy. He was actually harmless and if it was slow, we'd play along. Sometimes he'd actually place an order. Of course, he'd call back and cancel it later....

El Pollo Guerrera
12-16-2008, 10:41 PM
I've been trying to rationalize the concept of 'pink camo undergarments' since I read this... as to "WHY???"

The only thing I can come up with is: If you are planning to spend the night at a house where a mass-murdering killer used to live (think Jason of "Friday the 13th"), and just to be safe, you have the pink camo undies so that you will help conceal you if you have to hide amongst the pink insulation.

That or you're hunting flamingos...

DGoddessChardonnay
12-16-2008, 11:32 PM
That or you're hunting flamingos...

When does Flamingo hunting season begin so I can be ready. This is something I'm hoping to see on the Outdoor Channel.:lol:

cinema guy
12-16-2008, 11:56 PM
The Special Air Service (SAS) used to paint their landrovers pink for desert camoflage.

TWOLF
12-17-2008, 02:06 AM
pink camo panties?????do you even want to know what he is hunting for?:devil:

Sliceanddice
12-17-2008, 02:47 AM
"oh, it would do my bunions a world of good!"

"but watch out for that throbbing pustule, its infectious"

El Pollo Guerrera
12-17-2008, 06:10 AM
The Special Air Service (SAS) used to paint their landrovers pink for desert camoflage.

Dear God.

Someone needs to get a pink camo Landrover and drive around the Lower mainland near where Gravekeeper lives.

Salesmonkey
12-17-2008, 03:31 PM
Behold the pink camo thong! (safe for work)

http://www.shoes.com/Shop/productdetails.aspx?catalog_name=web&pg=5081488&p=EC1127359&CMP=OTC-Bizrate&partnerid=Bizrate&cpc=Bizrate&=campaign=Astrodeck&category=A&cpckw=Astrodeck+Womens+XW+3+Wedge+Sandal+(Pink+Cam o)

Gravekeeper
12-18-2008, 05:21 AM
Urine sould only be green if you're Mr. Spock.

+1 cookie for you for the Red Dwarf reference.

That said, I've been desperately trying to avoid this thread knowing that only bizzarity and/or horror would be involved should I deem to click on it.

I received the former from the op, and the latter from Jester. -.-