no offense to any guys here

[reformedwaitress]

but at the moment, I have to say it.

Guys confuse me. And right now, I don't like guys very much. They make me cry and I dont like crying.

I know this is confusing and babble, but I don't know how better to explain it right now and I just needed to vent for a moment. :(

[NightAngel]

Nope, we'll never understand them and they shall never understand us.
It falls into the category of, "Sad But True."

I'm sorry you're hurting right now. :(

[Misanthropical]

I'm married to a guy, gave birth to two boys and I still don't understand guys.

I hope things get better for you.

[RavenStarr]

I'm married and have 3 boys....well 4 if you count my husband LOL. I wish I could say that I've figured guys out but sadly I haven't.

[Department stores *sigh*]

just recently got dumped by my gf of three years. girls are no cakewalk either :lol:

[Greenday]

I just don't understand the majority of people these days. I just wish the girls I hung out with would stop either teasing me or playing with my mind.

[blas]

Here Here......I got stood up AGAIN tonight......what the hell is wrong with these guys, why even get someone's hopes up and make plans if you're not even going to go through with them?

This year looks just as bleek as the 2 before it......rrrrr. My very first time being stood up in 2007.

[Rapscallion]

Being single is great - trust me on this.

Rapscallion

[symposes]

I wonder how many women expect men to be deep.
Like when they ask "What are you thinking about?"
If i say, "Nothing" Then its either nothing, or something you dont want to know about in the first place. IE if im thinking about videogames, and i know the woman doesnt give a flip about videogames, If i say im thinking about videogames, its just a mood killer. but if i say, nothing. "Well how can you think ofnothing?"
Hmm maybe because i zone out when im not trying to think?

[reformedwaitress]

I wonder how many women expect men to be deep.

I don't expect guys to be deep. But when you ask a girl to marry you and then less than 48 hours later suddenly say that you don't want to be together anymore, that she's done nothing wrong and you want to be friends, but you can't be together anymore and you can't even give a reason.........well, it confuses me and it hurts and I don't understand. :(

[Jester]

Okay, ladies and gentlemen, please allow me to once again refer to my Universal Law of the Sexes. It is a very simple law. To wit:

All men are stupid.
All women are insane.
There are no exceptions.

Once you accept the above, things may not always make complete sense, but they will make MORE sense.


We now return you to your regularly scheduled slew of SC's demanding free stuff they don't deserve. And thank you for giving me the rare opportunity to use the word "slew" in a sentence.

[alogram]

Or as George Carlin says:

Men are stupid.
Women are crazy.

The reason that women are crazy is that men are stupid!

:lol:

[BusBus]

oh RW! *hugs* That is awful! That kind of behaviour would be confusing to both genders. I hope that things get better for you.

[Ree]

Hmm...he went to a lot of trouble to pop the question, based on the beautiful story you told us, so he must have wanted to do it.

Maybe he suddenly just got scared.
Maybe he felt pressured into it, because he thought that was what you or family expected of him.

Maybe he's done something bad in a moment of weakness or panic, and rather than come clean and face you on it, he'd rather pull the age-old "it's not you, it's me" crap.

I am so sorry you're hurting, and I hope he comes to his senses and gives you a better explanation.http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v219/lilsis1125/Smileys/support.gif

[Dreamstalker]

*hugs* I don't get guys either...

[Rahmota]

I'm a guy and I dont understand us sometimes. Then again I understand women even less.

But about your fella. I know this may sound odd but ws his family compleately on board with the wedding plans as well? I ask because this sounds almost like either what Ree said or like he was all for it and then someone got to him and changed his mind for him. Not to sound too much like a conspiracy theorist or anything.

I am sorry this is not a good time right now. Perhaps thigns will work out in the future. Believe me though I went through quite a bit before getting together with my soulmate. Had a few mistakes, mistarts and plenty of rejection. I mean for the senior prom I got turned down 44 out of 42 times.

[dispatch]

I can't understand why she and my family are trying to guilt-trip me back into a relationship that we were both miserable in

human mating rituals are really shitty when you look at some of the other species, sure we don't get eaten by our partners or our young, but the whole process is way too long and involved if you ask me

if I had the chance to re-roll I'd go the fish route, the female leaves her eggs lying around, the male makes a deposit and voila, babies!

[Posture Moll]

I wonder how many women expect men to be deep.
Like when they ask "What are you thinking about?"

Maybe I'm an anomaly but I'd NEVER want to know what the men around me are really thinking. I think I'd become waaaay too disturbed, so I never ask! :lol:

I don't pretend to understand men...or most other women for that matter. People are strange, strange creatures, in my opinion.

[Mr. Rager!]

I know very little about women...

So what I just try and be polite. I have to say though, sales has helped me a lot with relationships... I can read people a bit better than I used to be able to. Although, I'm sure I'm VERY FAR from perfect.

And I do ask my gf (when I have one, that is) what she's thinking about... I ask because I care and I want to know.

But yeah... I can see how women can find us confusing. And I KNOW how men can find women confusing. It's fun!!:p

[iradney]

that's a shame RW - I can't even begin to imagine the pain and confusion you're experiencing. Just know that we're here for you, ok?

[DarthRetard]

I feel your pain.....not to that extent.....but....

July 23rd.....my girlfriend at the time, who I have yet to get over, dumped me that night.....that night being the night before I left for the Marine Corps....

I was more alone that next day in my mind and heart than I have ever felt....but I have realized on a strictly philosophical basis, that there are others, and if you have a good set of friends to keep you in perspective, it helps.

It did hurt though, being told I'm "A good guy, and she loves me, and would do anything to be with me, but she just couldn't handle me being away sometimes."
It still hurts. I second guess whole life decisions because of it. Not often, but sometimes I do, because I wish I still had her. She was the one person who could pull me out of depression like a fly fisherman could a trout, she'd just rip me out.

Nothing ever happened on that level like happened to you, but remember, some of the biggest tragedies are set-ups for the biggest victories. One door closes, another opens. I was discharged out of the Marine Corps, but now I'm a personal trainer. Just apply the experience elsewhere.

My only advice is try to not go the opposite with the pendulum, and stop trusting people and such. Be wary, sure, but don't give up on anyone and stuff like that. Who knows, maybe he's just like Dante from Clerks 2 and couldn't dance....

I wrote a song for this girl too, maybe I'll show you guys sometime...:(

[Jester]

Hmmm. It seems some people may have taken my above post as being crass and unfeeling. And I can understand how some people may have thought that. But it wasn't. Allow me to explain.

First of all, RW and I have become rather good friend off the boards. I find her to be a fine, intelligent, caring, generous, witty, funny, and all around great person, with a knack for great conversation, and a love for life that is infectious. She also loves sports, so how can she not be awesome? To wit, she is someone to whom I would entrust the care of my nieces, the closest things to kids I will ever have. And I cannot say something higher than that about a person.

That being said, I have been known to try to be funny (here and other places) and fail miserably. I have been known to say things and offend people without any intent of so doing. However, RW was aware of my above post literally moments after it was made (since I told her) and found it rather entertaining. Had she not, I would have apologized to her and withdrawn it immediately. While there are many people on this planet, and probably on this forum, that deserve my mockery, she is without question not one of them.

On a related note, I have shared with RW my pain and bewilderment at being dumped by my fiancee (often referred to by me here and elsewhere as "The Brit") a few years ago. I do not pretend to know the whys and whererfore of RW's situation, but having been somewhat in her shoes, I feel I can empathize. (Or as The Brit would type, "empathise.")

My comments in the earlier post were meant to lighten the heavy load a bit, but also to relay my personal philosophy about the state of relations between men and women.* It was not directly nor indirectly a shot at RW, nor a belittlement of her current situation. Not everything translates online, I know, but I honestly belive that most people who would think that I would do something that crass have not really taken the time to read many of my posts. (Yes, I am an ass, but I am a caring ass.)

The fact is, most if not all of us have been in relationships. Most if not all of us have been in relationships that have hurt us. I would be lying beyond belief if I said I was over The Brit. Hell, I have not really ever even gotten over my first love, from the senior year of high school, and I am 36! This is part of life, and so I will mock it. The general situation, mind you, not this specific one. I believe that there are few parts of life that, once you are well enough removed from them, you cannot laugh at. The interplay of romantic relationships is, when you are not directly involved, freakin' hilarious, in all its aspects. This is not to say I laugh at RW or her current difficulties. I have said that already, and I will say it again. Frankly, I hope that RW's boy either (a) comes to his senses real fucking soon, or (b) gets torn to shreds by a rabidly hungry giant mutated guinea pig. She fucking deserves better. That being said, I do believe that one day RW herself will probably find this amusing, no matter what the final outcome. I believe this because she has one hell of a sense of humor. Hell, she finds me funny, so she either has that sense of humor or is more disturbed than current psychiatry can treat!

Here endeth the Serious Jester. Preferably for a long, long, LONG time. Hell, if you read this damn thing this far, you are obviously an insomniac, as everyone else dozed off by the second paragraph. Seek help. Now. (NOTE: Any insomniacs offended by that comment, get over it. Better yet, piss off. I've been an insomniac all my life.)

*(I cannot comment on the state of relations between men and men, as I have never dated a man. Equally, I cannot comment on the state of relations between women and women, as I have never been a woman. I comment only on that which I have some vague personal knowledge.)

[NightAngel]

Jester,

Totally my bad. I apologize.

[AFpheonix]

IE if im thinking about videogames, and i know the woman doesnt give a flip about videogames, If i say im thinking about videogames, its just a mood killer. but if i say, nothing. "Well how can you think ofnothing?"
Hmm maybe because i zone out when im not trying to think?

Is "videogame" code for "boobies"? :lol:

I'm sorry RW, while I never had to go through the broken engagement thing, I've been through the yoyo relationship thing, and it's no fun at all. About all I can do is give you a virtual hug and a virtual pint of double fudge brownie ice cream :(

[ArenaBoy]

Don't worry, I'm a guy and I don't understand us either. Now as a guy who grew up in a neighborhood of girls, I still don't understand. :lol:

[Jester]

Jester,

Totally my bad. I apologize.


NA, no need to apologize, and you know why. As does RW. And anyone else who feels they need to know why....is wrong.

[protege]

Now as a guy who grew up in a neighborhood of girls, I still don't understand. :lol:

That's why some of us have our cars. They *always* understand :p

[Dreamstalker]

Or computers (if mine screws up all I have to do is threaten it with a reformat) :D
I'm sorry RW, while I never had to go through the broken engagement thing, I've been through the yoyo relationship thing, and it's no fun at all.
I'm going through the yo-yo right now....the guy seems to be sabotaging himself and is trying to drag me down with him (yeah, I'm struggling as well, but at least I have a degree and am getting needed help).

[Geek King]

Try looking up a movie of an stage show called "Defending the Caveman." It explains why men and women react certain ways in general. I've found it useful, if not universally true. Can't apply generallities to everyone, and what not. It also has some funny moments as a bonus. Well worth the watch.

ReformedWaitress, and everone else who mentioned having a similer experience, I'm sorry. I can only say I hope you find happiness in the future. I won't say I know what you're feeling. I don't. I've never had a serious relationship, and I'm starting to wonder if I'm fated to be a bachelor for the rest of my life. But you do have my best wishes. I love to see couples happy, it gives me hope for myself.

Bah, enough my writing. Don't mean to hold a pity party for myself. Please don't take it that way

[protege]

I'm not going to bore you all with the details of my last relationship...it's all in the LJ around June/July 2001. In a nutshell, my then-gf moved away for a new job, and didn't want to discuss things. Then, she disappeared for 6 months, and let her *mother* tell me it was over. After that, and the crap that came later, I've given up. That's all I'm going to say :)

Anyway, hang in there!

[Dreamstalker]

"I'm pulling for ya cause we're all in this together." </Red Green>

I think my yo-yo just needs to figure out what he wants and how much he wants it (I told him that I'd be in Boston for an indefinite time with job training...at least I have marketable skills).