Being romantic vs. Being Creepy

[joe hx]

Is there a thin line between being romantic and being creepy? There's a girl I like, and I'm pretty sure she knows I like her (but I don't know if she likes me). I wanted to buy her flowers (probably roses) and have them delivered to her place. So, is that creepy, or romantic?

Thanks

edit: We've been on two dates. One was lunch, one was a movie.

[Whiskey]

The line between creepy and romantic tends to be thinner or wider depending on how much said girl likes you.

Two dates, I'd do something a little less than roses. Carnations, daisies, maybe a sunflower or something. Roses make a big statement.

[flybye023]

I think flowers are okay, especially after 2 dates. The note that goes with it on the other hand... Be careful :)

"I enjoyed your company" plus an invitation to a 3rd date=sweet
"I declare my undying love and want to be with you forever" =creepy.

[Taboo]

Agreeing with the previous.

If you want roses, maybe roses mixed with something else. I'd feel a little odd getting a whole bouquet of red roses after two dates, that's more a special occasions thing. Something like this would still have roses without the same implications.

2671

[Whiskey]

I might be a huge paranoid freak or something (its likely) but if I got something like Taboo attached, I'd be a little weirded out. Personally, I would save something like that for a couple months down the line if/when it turns into an actual relationship. If something like the following showed up at my desk, i'd consider it really neat

http://img837.imageshack.us/img837/2492/16405z.jpg

http://img202.imageshack.us/img202/3308/16009z.jpg
That one youd have to know her. If shes a drinker with a sense of humor that would be hilarious. I lol'd. :D

http://img213.imageshack.us/img213/1522/2387vz.jpg
If youre dead set on roses, do purple or some other pastel.

Red Roses have generally meant I LOVE YOU in everything women see about romance. Again, all my personal opinion :) good luck, you seem nice!

[Magpie]

A friend of mine did this. I give you the same advice I gave him: if you have any clue what kind of flowers she likes, make sure it's those. I, for one, don't really care, but they need to smell nice. (Jackdaw knows it's more than his life is worth to expect me to care about carnations. He always got me single roses).

Oh, and don't do it if she is the kind of person who wouldn't enjoy gentle ribbing/want to show off that a guy likes her (either or). Some girls would love that sort of attention, others less so.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I like the yellow ones whiskey posted. they're bright and cheery.

someone at work has the giant margarita glass in her office. presumably fake flowers, since it's been there for quite some time.

[MaggieTheCat]

I like the yellow ones too. And I also agree that roses are a bit much at this point. Personally I loved getting flowers from my husband when we were dating (I would still love to get them from him!) but he only sent them when I asked, which kind of defeated the purpose. I hope your lady friend likes them. :D

[RecoveringKinkoid]

No red roses at this point. That is coming on way too strong.

Some cheerful pastel in any other color would be okay. Personally, another flower type would be safer.

I can tell you straight up I have been sent red roses by someone who I didn't have that sort of relationship with and I thought it was pretty awkward and uncomfortable.

[XCashier]

That yellow bouquet is very nice. Cheerful and positive without being too much. If you want to send flowers, something like that would be nice. Might want to ask the florist for advice, too.

[Taboo]

Hm. I guess I'd creep out some of you then, haha. Oh well?

[Becks]

http://img213.imageshack.us/img213/1522/2387vz.jpg


I want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Peppergirl]

Shit...it's been so long since any man has sent me flowers, because I'm usually the one pissing *them* off, not the other way around. :lol:

Anyway - I'd say go for yellow roses after a couple more dates, but if you really want to do some now, don't go for roses. Do one like what Whiskey posted. Any of those are gorgeous, and appropriate to the situation.

Just trust us on this, ok? ;)

[Seshat]

As a general rule, the line between 'romantic' and 'creepy' is where a girl's 'no' or 'not now' signals are ignored.

But in this case, for this purpose, I'd go for a lower-toned flower bunch. Not roses, and not something huge. Talk to the florist, though the advice here is good too.

[zombiequeen]

I think the general rule is what would you get a friend? Or your sister? My brother would give me a single carnation, or lilies because I love lilies and they are not a declaration of love like roses are.

Although, I would be ecstatic if my husband got me ANY flowers at all...he does get me chocolate and soda though.

[emax4]

No red roses at this point. That is coming on way too strong.

Some cheerful pastel in any other color would be okay. Personally, another flower type would be safer.

I can tell you straight up I have been sent red roses by someone who I didn't have that sort of relationship with and I thought it was pretty awkward and uncomfortable.

This is dead on. Roses have different meanings based on their color. I've heard that even specific flowers have different meanings as well. If you Google "meanings of rose colors" or something similar you'll find links. BUT...

not to burst your bubble, you still may want to wait. I wouldn't send roses to her workplace (unless she told you something along the lines of where she works and how she likes surprises). If you two go on a third date, why not present the roses at that time? One, you won't worry about being creepy because you're right there in each other's presence. Two, it's appropriate anyway since you're going on yet another date.

While I'm at it, one more piece of advice: Don't buy her any gifts yet. My friend has a bad habit of doing this for women he starts to date but yet aren't in a steady-dating relationship. He bought this girl a Playboy bunny necklace, and she's not showing the commitment he wants (not expects). I told him that when a woman gets a gift like this, they may feel like the gift giver thinks he can buy their affection, that the recipient may feel some sort of obligation right away if they do accept it (and aren't prepared at that moment to say "no" and make things awkward or difficult).

Best of luck man!

[hawkchick11]

The guy I'm seeing sent me flowers at work the day after our first date. He knew I had a bad day at work the previous day and I was having another bad day, so he sent me flowers to cheer me up. He knew my fave flowers were gerbera daisies but in the card wrote that they were "rather unfortunate looking" when he went to the flower shop (it was a joke we had going) so he sent me white/pink roses and lilies.

Everyone I worked with thought it was sweet and so did I :D He's the only guy to ever send me flowers.

[blas]

How about daisies or carnations? Still pretty, but more casual.

[Flying Grype]

You know what I find creepy? Guys trying too hard and doing everything 'by the book'. :roll: Hmm, what do girls like? Roses! Chocolate! Dinner in nice restaurants! When you do all that formulaic stuff before you even know her well enough to know what she likes, it makes you look like you're just trying to get into her pants and, as someone said earlier, buy her affection with money. Be patient and be her friend first, if you really think you like her for more than sex.