I got food poisoning...I think. [Archive]

COMINATCHA

07-18-2006, 06:52 AM

Why, oh why, do I always seem to be surrounded by drama??
Drama is like a magnet, and I seem to be it's fridge, cause it really likes me - alot.

Yesterday I was out shopping, and Ben (my boyfriend) calls me and suggests we meet up, and maybe go back to his place. He had been away all weekend on a fishing trip, and I was starting to miss him, so I said "okay" and he came and met me at the shops. We went back to his place, around 6pm, and he cracked open a bottle of Jack Daniels, and then showed me the heap of fish he'd brought home with him. He asked if I wanted to taste some (I never eat fish, but am willing to give it a go), and I was like "Yea sure, why not." So he cooked me some, and as it was cooking, we had a few drinks. When I say a 'few' I mean that I only had 3. That's good considering my booze-filled past.

I then ate the fish, which wasn't all that good. It was just fish on it's own, like he had no vegetables or anything to go with it, so yea it was bland. And I had to make sure I avoided them pesky fish bones.

I started feeling really drunk by that stage, which may be because I don't drink as much as I used to, so my body isn't as tolerant to it anymore?

Anyway, I stopped drinking, and Ben's friend decided to come over and join us. A few hours passed and the boys decide they want to go to their friends house - WITHOUT ME - so they leave and say they will be back for me soon. I don't have a car at the moment (it died - i'm getting my new one on saturday!) so I didn't have a way of getting home, and wasn't prepared to get a train on my own at night when I was a little drunk.

I was so pissed off that I wandered off by myself and called my mum to come pick me up. She was so angry at Ben, and she came and got me straight away. I got home and went straight to bed.

About an hour later I started feeling extremely dizzy. I thought that maybe I was dehydrated so I got out of bed and went to the kitchen to get some orange juice. The room started spinning around, and I had to concentrate so hard just to pour the orange juice. I was feeling really hot, and sweaty, and was about to pass out. The orange juice fell and went everywhere, as I hit the ground and passed out. I banged my head really hard on the tiles, and the room was spinning around so fast, and there was this loud throbbing in my head. I was really scared, I'd never felt anything like that before, it was awful. I seriously thought I was guna die or something, that's how bad it was. I kept trying to get myself off the floor but it was like there were bricks on me or something, cause I couldn't get up. I managed to slowly crawl over to my sisters bedroom, and she must have heard me cause she opened the door and was like "Are you alright?"

I felt stupid, but I seriously could not get up, and my head throbbed and it felt like I was dripping with sweat but it turns out I wasn't, so I just imagined that (which is even more creepy). My mum came out and make me get into bed. She kept saying that my drink must have been spiked, and that I need to stop going for 'weird boys.' She was fuming, i've never seen her so angry. I know my drink wasn't spiked, Ben would never do anything to hurt me, he told me so himself. I'm going with the food poisoning theory, cause it kind of makes sense doesn't it? I've never had that before, so I don't know what it does to you, but I can't think of any other reason why I reacted like that.

So anyway, this morning I wake up vomitting (so gross) and I still felt faint whenever I stood up. It's now afternnon, and I do feel a little bit better, but my god that was the worst experience ever. And I have this massive bump on my head now. My mum said that she wants me to cut off all contact with Ben, as she really hates him. I don't want to do that. Even though leaving me alone in his apartment was wrong, I still love him, and I don't want to just give up on that :cry:

Rapscallion

07-18-2006, 07:15 AM

If you need to rehydrate, avoid orange juice. It tastes good, but it is a diuretic - makes you pee. Alcohol and tea/coffee have the same effect. Plain water is far better.

Rapscallion

Broomjockey

07-18-2006, 07:28 AM

Sounds like bad dehydration mixed with food poisoning.
But yeah, drinking anything but straight water isn't that great when you're really dehydrated, it can do funky things to you.

Barefootgirl

07-18-2006, 07:48 AM

I know my drink wasn't spiked, Ben would never do anything to hurt me, he told me so himself.

Er, do you REALLY think anyone is going to turn round and say "I fancy the pants off you and by the way, I might spike your drink for a laugh once in a while"? Yes, it does sound more like food poisoning than a spiked drink (where had he been keeping those fish over the weekend?), but without wishing to hurt your feelings, its very naive to think someone won't hurt you just because they said they wouldn't.

The thing that concerns me is that he went off to his mate's house, leaving you behind and said he'd come back for you later. Why did he even bother callling you, if he wanted to spend the evening at his friend's house? I can't remeber exact6ly, but I think you said this guy is quite young, right? He sounds rather immature, and frankly, you could probably do better. It might not be so drama-filled, but you might find its more enjoyable that way.

COMINATCHA

07-18-2006, 08:14 AM

Er, do you REALLY think anyone is going to turn round and say "I fancy the pants off you and by the way, I might spike your drink for a laugh once in a while"? Yes, it does sound more like food poisoning than a spiked drink (where had he been keeping those fish over the weekend?), but without wishing to hurt your feelings, its very naive to think someone won't hurt you just because they said they wouldn't.

The thing that concerns me is that he went off to his mate's house, leaving you behind and said he'd come back for you later. Why did he even bother callling you, if he wanted to spend the evening at his friend's house? I can't remeber exact6ly, but I think you said this guy is quite young, right? He sounds rather immature, and frankly, you could probably do better. It might not be so drama-filled, but you might find its more enjoyable that way.

Okay so maybe i'm naive, but when he was telling me how much he cared about me, he made a point of saying that he would never intentionally hurt me, after i've told him about my bad experiences with guys. Yes he could be lying I guess, but I really don't think he would do something like that.

He had kept the fish in the freezer, so I really don't understand how it could have gone so bad, but I can't think of any other explanation for my bad reaction?

And yea the bit about him leaving me was the worst part. I asked him why he did that, and he said "I really don't know. I was drunk and didn't think. I'm so sorry babe."

I don't want to lose him. Yes he is a little bit younger than me (19), but I really like him. We get along so well, it's like we have known each other forever. But my mum is so adamant that I get him out of my life completely, I don't really know what to do.

Rapscallion

07-18-2006, 08:22 AM

If the fish is bad when it goes in the freezer, it will still be bad when it comes out - depends on the freshness when he bought it. May have been leftovers from a few days before.

I never eat fish anyway, what with me having functioning tastebuds.

Rapscallion

COMINATCHA

07-18-2006, 08:28 AM

depends on the freshness when he bought it. May have been leftovers from a few days before.

He caught the fish himself on the weekend, so it was very much fresh - another reason it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. I thought maybe it wasn't cooked properly, but people eat raw fish so that theory doesn't really work either.

The Gatekeeper

07-18-2006, 09:01 AM

Hmm a couple of things don't strike me as quite right. Food poisoning is more than getting dizzy. Depending on the time frame (4-8 hours) and the kind of food poisoning and the severity. Usually what happens is within the time period you will start feeling nauseous and need to "use the bathroom" urgently. This included stomach cramps and throwing up. Yes you may feel feverish.

Is it possible that there may have been something not quite right with the fish, or even that the fish were toxic with something. So to me, based on what you said, it sounds like something more to do with the drink.

My suspicious mind immediately flashed on him drugging you, then going off to get his friends to bring back, for who knows what. Good on you for getting the hell out of there. Mom seems to have an instinct about him too, which is good.

Please be careful. How well do you really know this guy? Do you think that you could be so infatuated with the idea of having a boyfriend that you may be overlooking some serious warning signs?

Or he could just be a wanker, and what he said was legit.

Misanthropical

07-18-2006, 01:23 PM

Maybe you are allergic to fish. I'm not sure how food allergies work, though.

Greenday

07-18-2006, 02:51 PM

Maybe you are allergic to fish. I'm not sure how food allergies work, though.
I don't know if it's universal, but my stepdad is allergic to fish and it's pretty freaking bad. The effects are nearly instant too. His throat horribly swells up and he can barely breathe.

As someone else said, if the fish goes into the freezer bad, it comes out bad. Plus, where the hell did he catch it? Was it out in the ocean, or a lake filled with nuclear wastes?

And as for him ditching you, you need to give him a good, hard smack over the head. And if he responds with, "Ow, what was that for?" hit him harder again. Drunk or not, that's stupid. Now, I know drinking can mess with our thinking progress, but the only times I can't remember when I was drinking was when I was passed out. No drinks for him until he can be responsible about it.

PuckishOne

07-18-2006, 04:00 PM

Food poisoning is more than getting dizzy.
Food poisoning, as the name implies, means that something's got into your body, and your body wants it out now. Generally speaking it's like GK said - you feel it in your stomach, and it's not uncommon to be "going at both ends," so to speak (sorry for the gross-out). Unless you later became sick, I think you can probably rule out food poisoning - which is good, since the after-effects can linger for days & days.

lordlundar

07-18-2006, 04:12 PM

I'd put it more to dehydration and the alchohol. Booze does not flush the system out, it just dehydrates you faster.

And the vomitting the next morning? Hangover with dehydration. (yes, it happens)

In all honesty, you probably should have went to the hospital overnight and they would have done an IV for you to rehydrate. As well if there was something wrong with the food or drink you had (bad or spiked) they would have confirmed it.

Cia

07-18-2006, 04:19 PM

I think that the fish was bad somehow and it mixed with the alcohol and made you really sick. Your BF might not have stored it properly between the time he caught it and then froze it or the fish was contaminated before he even caught it. Any toxic waste dump scandals around Australia lately?

Hope you are feeling better soon and please give your BF a good thwack to the back of the head for leaving you in a lurch. You just don't invite someone over and then leave them with no way to get home.

Gopher

07-18-2006, 07:11 PM

Just out of interest,

Did you and Ben ate the same fish or did you have a different fish each, and did he suffer from any of the same symptons as you?

Rapscallion

07-18-2006, 09:05 PM

I did a fair bit of health and hygiene training. Food poisoning can take from twenty minutes to three weeks to show, depending on what it is that affects you. The twenty minute ones tend to be shellfish based, if memory serves, but we're talking an awful number of syllables after a long day at work, and I doubt I could remember the names anyway.

The health officials I spoke to said that the potential for three weeks means that cases of food poisoning are nearly impossible to prosecute.

Rapscallion

blas87

07-18-2006, 11:46 PM

Comi, I admire the way you always try to seek out the good in people, even if they've hurt your feelings.

If Ben were my boyfriend and had done that to me........well.....let's just say that he'd be in an extreme amount of pain right now.

I've had food poisoning before, and it didn't take too long to set in, only a few hours. But then again, Raps knows more than I do. And it also depends on what kind of food it was. All I know is when I had it, I was puking and.....well, you know.....almost at the same time and I was miserable until it all went away. Within a day, I was much better.

COMINATCHA

07-19-2006, 01:22 AM

Just out of interest,

Did you and Ben ate the same fish or did you have a different fish each, and did he suffer from any of the same symptons as you?

I just realised that Ben never ate ANY of the fish...after telling my mum that, now she's all like "Oh so he tried to poison you or he spiked your drink, you really know how to pick em' don't you?"

COMINATCHA

07-19-2006, 01:27 AM

Plus, where the hell did he catch it? Was it out in the ocean, or a lake filled with nuclear wastes?

He caught the fish out in the ocean. He had eaten some over the weekend and didn't have any problems like I did, but some of the fish could have been bad and some not, and I just happened to eat the bad ones? It's creepy how I can't come up with an exact cause for getting sick. Even blaming the alcohol doesn't sit right, as I used to be able to drink HEAPS more than that and was fine (well, I didn't freak out like that.) Maybe it's something completely unrelated, like I just has some kind of bug/virus? I don't know. Thanks for trying to help, and yes I do feel a lot better now, but my head still hurts a bit.

Greenday

07-19-2006, 02:42 AM

Well, when you drink tons of alcohol in a really short time, you are going to skip a lot of stuff that happens when you pace yourself. You skip getting dizzy and such. When you just drink tons, you skip that and just pass out. That's my experiences anyway.

Anyways, I'm just glad to hear you are feeling better.

RavenStarr

07-19-2006, 04:07 AM

Comi hugs to you. I hope you are feeling better. I think it may be possible that the fish may have been undercooked. I ate undercooked fish once and let me tell you I thought I was gonna die. I don't think I had ever been so sick in my life.

Enough about me though, back to you. I think for Ben to take off and leave you was just awful.I'm going to stay off the subject of him possibly doing something to your food or drink. I would sit him down for a serious talk though.

*Hugs again*

Bella_Vixen

07-19-2006, 03:02 PM

I just realised that Ben never ate ANY of the fish...after telling my mum that, now she's all like "Oh so he tried to poison you or he spiked your drink, you really know how to pick em' don't you?"

HUGE red flag here, sweetie. This really sucks.

I think we all need to get together and make a visit to Comi.

COMINATCHA

07-22-2006, 10:30 AM

I rang Ben yesterday, to find out what was going on. I hadn't heard from him and wanted to know what was going on, like maybe whether he was going to apologise and I would forgive him and all would be great again.

He said "I need some time to think..."

I asked him what he needed to think about, and he said "Just about that night," and that he needs space to sort out how he feels.
It was as though he was saying I have done something bad, when he was the one who screwed up, right?

Shouldn't I be the hesitant one, what with me being possibly poisoned and all?!

I said to him "So I'll just leave you alone then?"

"Yea...I just don't think - "

I hung up on him when he was mid-sentence, cause I could feel tears coming on and didn't want to start crying to him.

I'm assuming I've been dumped. I know you guys are going to tell me that it's for the best, and you are probably right, but it still hurts.

I really really REALLY thought I had finally found a decent guy, only to be hurt YET AGAIN. It's wearing me down alot, this and the recent problems with work and me being told im getting fat. Grrrrrrrrr! :cry: http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=902

(sorry I complain alot, need to vent!)

symposes

07-22-2006, 11:14 AM

Poor Comi. Its a shame you have such a hard time finding nice people.
I know there are nice people somewhere.
I know im a nice person.
But being thousands of miles away, and already in a relationship kinda eliminates that possibility.

and if you fat, then my fat ass must be shamu size or something. (250 pounds, 5 foot 9) (113 kilos i think)

Ringman

07-22-2006, 12:11 PM

the recent problems with work and me being told im getting fat. Grrrrrrrrr! :cry:

(sorry I complain alot, need to vent!)

comi your not fat you look great for a girl your age.

and dont worry about the complaining as im shure a lot of people here like to read your posts about your life. :) :hug:

Greenday

07-22-2006, 01:10 PM

What a douchebag. If I had a girlfriend like you, I'd be doing whatever I could to keep you happy so you'd stay with me. You are a great person Comi. Don't let anyone else make you think otherwise.

Plaidman

07-22-2006, 02:28 PM

Becks

07-22-2006, 04:21 PM

Comi, we all love you here, and hopefully you know that. If the relationship is over, it IS for the best. You WILL find a wonderful guy that deserves you!!!!!

And if you're fat, well, then words cannot describe me.:eek:

:comforting pats:

COMINATCHA

07-23-2006, 01:22 AM

Yeah, two things that I really want you to read Comi, please, and maybe you can shed some light on it.

1: Did he pour the drinks in front of you? did he have the same?

2:Ok, the serious one is this. He and his friend said they would come back to you, why didn't they A: Give you a ride home, or B: Took you with them? They spefuly said 'they' will be back for you. Leaving you, alone, drunk in a home. You might feel dizzy and past out at his house, which wouldn't have been good.

3: I don't know too many people, then I again I never had a girlfriend, so this is just me talking, but going on and on and on and on about not hurting you? Seems just a little fishy to me. Like he is a little TOO desperate not to hurt you.

1. Yes he did pour them in front of me, and no he didn't have the same. He had beer.

2. Yea you are right. I've come to the conclusion that he is not the wonderful guy I had come to think of him as.

3. It's probably my fault that he said that a few times. I did, after all, tell him about how I have been hurt alot in the past (which even brough him to tears), so he was trying to gain my full trust.
Yet he still goes and hurts me...

NightAngel

07-23-2006, 02:06 AM

3. It's probably my fault that he said that a few times.

Uh, no.

See, I don't understand this way of thinking.
If he is, in all reality, a jerk it's not your fault that he's a jerk.
If he's a user then, yes, he's going to use what you say to gain your trust.
Guess what? It's not your fault.

You did not make him what he is- nor can you change what he is. He didn't meet you and suddenly become a user- he was that way long before you and will continue on.

You have no right to take the blame for him.
You have every right to be angry about what he's done.

/mini-rant

Irving Patrick Freleigh

07-23-2006, 02:22 AM

The fact that Ben left you alone while you were drunk tells me he's a big-time sleaze.

I'll take your word for it when you say you think you got food poisoning from the fish (Ben didn't have any, if he did he might have gotten sick too), but it is still possible he slipped something in your drink.

Don't keep beating yourself up. Eventually you'll meet a wonderful guy who'll make you forget about all your past bad experiences with guys.

blas87

07-23-2006, 03:04 AM

My beautiful Comi, you and I are rowing in the same boat right now..............horrible, nasty, terrible guys are attracted to us like ants on bubblegum. For whatever reason, we are just in a huge rut where we can't find the right guy. We even get a "trick" once in a while where a guy comes along that we think is different, and totally sweeps us off our feet.......and then a few weeks later, they show their true colors and blow us off, or even worse, break our hearts very badly and destroy our trust in them. I haven't had exactly what's happened to you happen to me, but I've had horrible luck the past, oh, year and a half with guys, and that one bf of mine was a "trick", because it looked like everything was turning around, only to have it end worse than it ended with any other guy.

You should really consider doing what I'm doing: Just be without a guy for a while.

I am not even looking for a guy right now. Some cross my path and I might take interest (except in the creepy guy recently), but in general, I've just been ignoring them and pretending they don't exist. I'm finding that having lots of guys as friends helps you "get into" a guy's head, and it's helped me find the answers as to why guys behave the way they do, and why they do the things they do to me, and why they get such joy out of it.

Spend some time with your friends, some time with your family, and ultimately, some time alone. Whether you're watching movies, having some ice cream, or some girl talk with the ladies, you'll feel a lot better. It's like a big weight off of your shoulders. You don't need to worry about men and their games.

This way, when you least expect it, a decent guy will fall out of the sky and treat you with respect and be everything you've always wanted in a guy.

Do what I'm doing, you will feel tons better. It'll save you a lot of stress, worry, tears, and heartbreak.

Cutenoob

07-23-2006, 03:22 AM

To both Blas and Comi:

Correct to be alone, single, spinster, independant, whatever you want to call it.

Learn how to live with yourself, by yourself, support yourself and be exactly who you are..with yourself.

Learn the independance and love for your own soul. Until you have that skill/ability, you really ARENT ready for being a partner.

Now.

From now on, you eat at prepared food resturaunts, you drink thingsyou either pour or is brought to you by someone you pay.

For at least a good 90 days before you let someone feed you: this way you can get a good feel/handle on them.

You're quick to trust men, and quick to jump in, because 1. You want attention...2. You are somewhat co-dependant.

That's common, and really, not too hard to fix (If you want). Counseling, Self Help, and doing some plain old growing up.

Cominatcha, I wish you better judgement, and better luck.

Cute

Barefootgirl

07-24-2006, 11:58 AM

Perhaps you should do a bit of self-study, and try to figure out why you feel you can't be complete without a man. I mean, having a boyfriend is nice, but it's hardly the be-all and end-all of everything, is it?

As for your boss being a bit of a knob, well, if you don't like what he's saying, but you like the job, why don't you just switch clubs?

NightWolf

07-24-2006, 04:36 PM

I don't get it. I really don't. Why do so many nice people have such a hard time finding someone they are compatible with? I've got a few friends that are down to earth, laid back, and I wouldn't consider them ugly. (But then again, it's hard for most guys to look at another guy and call him cute.) :o

One has a bit of a belly, and the other.....Well, thats the one I just can't figure out. I would think he'd have a really beautiful girl, but doesn't. I mean, neither of these guys are jerks, in fact, most girls call them sweat hearts and characters. (Their personalities are quite funny.) Yet, they seem to have a hard time finding a good girl.

Same thing with me.....I've only ever been able to attract one kind of girl. I've only been able to attract the heavier set women. Now don't get me wrong, I've dated some really super heavier set women and I kick myself for letting them go, but I think every guy wants that one girl that gives him butterflies in his stomach. Someone so pretty to them, they knot up and act like a total goof just trying to talk to them. I've never had that. :( When I find it, I get the good ole (I just wanna be friends routine, or you're too nice and I'd really hate it if we ruined it with a relationship)

So...what gives? Why do so many nice people have such a hard time?

I guess this is another one of those, "Things that make you go hmmmmm..."

Oh....and big hugs for COMI....I'm sorry to hear of the news. :(

Ree

07-25-2006, 01:00 AM

.....I've only ever been able to attract one kind of girl. I've only been able to attract the heavier set women. Now don't get me wrong, I've dated some really super heavier set women and I kick myself for letting them go, but I think every guy wants that one girl that gives him butterflies in his stomach....Yeah, my husband did, too, and he got that with me...and I'm....heavy!!!! :p

NightAngel

07-25-2006, 05:28 AM

Yeah, my husband did, too, and he got that with me...and I'm....heavy!!!! :p

And then there's my poor hubby- who whines that I'm, "too skinny" and that I should, "gain weight". :rolleyes:

Face it- you gotta be happy with you 'cause no matter what the man (or woman) you're with will inevitably wish you were a little more... or less... something.

AFpheonix

07-25-2006, 06:08 AM

My husband likes to play with my pooch for some reason. Wierdo :lol:

NightWolf

07-25-2006, 01:46 PM

Well, I gotta say, I was pretty damn moronic for leaving one of my GF's back in high school. Yes, once again, she was a lil on the heavier side, but had a face like an angel and would do anything for me. And oh man could she cook!!!! I later found out she went on to school to become a doctor. WTF was I thinking leaving!?!?!? :lol:

Playing with your pooch? As in dog or are you talking like a kangaroo pouch? If the 2nd is the case, what can I say....we guys like interactive parts. :p

AFpheonix

07-25-2006, 05:37 PM

pooch as in my tummy :) He likes moogling the dent my horse put in my ass, too. :rolleyes:

NightWolf

07-25-2006, 07:46 PM

I'm tellin ya, it's that interactive thing. :D

VicSilver

07-26-2006, 12:52 AM

Amen to that, Ree!

I'm definitely no lightweight, and you don't need to be a supermodel to give someone the butterflies in the belly. You just need to click!

I always saw myself with a nice, well muscled skater type yuppy guy, with the bleached blonde short hair. Sounds dumb, right?

I ended up with a super skinny computer geek with glasses, dark hair with streaks of grey, and a fondness for hawaiian tshirts...and he makes me feel melty.
Looks are nice, but personality is everything.

I doubt that the "ideal man" that I had in my head would be nearly as much fun, or would get my dorky geek jokes.

blas87

07-26-2006, 01:33 AM

I don't give anyone butterflies in their stomach. For some reason, something about me gives guys subliminal messages to hurt me as badly as possible (emotionally, that is), and to have as great of a time as possible doing it.

Ringman

07-26-2006, 01:50 AM

blas dont be so hard on your self, youll find a great guy that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. :hug: ;)

Dreamstalker

07-26-2006, 02:16 AM

what can I say....we guys like interactive parts. :p
:spew: Thanks, I almost spit green tea all over the desk (again) :p

Ree

07-26-2006, 02:19 AM

When a person continually gets hurt in relationship after relationship, that signifies a certain pattern of behaviour, and perhaps it's time to rethink what attracts one to the opposite sex.

It's so wrong to blame or be suspect of the entire male human species when it's possible that a person is simply choosing the same type of guy over and over again.

That's when a person has to look inward.

Why does this keep happening?
Are there clues that I am missing?

Is there something I am doing to sabotage myself and my relationships?

Last year, I attended a workshop with a child psychologist who deals with damaged and troubled kids.
One of the things I learned was that often, these kids are so sure they are going to be hurt, and are convinced that everyone they meet has a stick behind their back, ready to swing, so their goal is to get that stick swinging as soon as they possibly can.

I think that's relevant here.

Is there a fear of commitment on my part, so I am picking partners who will ensure that I will never have to commit?

Am I afraid of getting hurt, so I get into relationships that don't allow me to open myself up fully and end up getting hurt anyway because I have picked someone who is emotionally cold?

So, yeah, there are people out there who are real jerks, but there are also some very good people.

If you burn your hand on a hotplate, you soon learn from that experience and recognize signals and warning signs.
You know that a red coil means high heat. You know that heat burns and it hurts.

You don't put your hand near that red hot coil. Simple as that.

Why, then, in relationships, do people keep putting their hands on that darn red coil?

LostMyMind

07-26-2006, 02:33 AM

Why, then, in relationships, do people keep putting their hands on that darn red coil?
I blame that memory problem I got :cry: I keep forgetting :p

NightWolf

07-26-2006, 04:40 PM

*Hands Dreamstalker a towel* Sorry....:lol:

I don't give anyone butterflies in their stomach.

How do you know? Maybe their scared to talk to you because they think you'll reject them. ;) I honestly don't think I'd be able to just walk up to you and make idle conversation without tripping over every word like a goon.

I've been so nervous talking to someone that I've planned out what I'm going to say, and then I totally clam up like a fool and say nothing. Why, because I'm so nervous and worried that she'll laugh in my face. Yeah...ain't love grand. :D

Sphinx

07-26-2006, 04:44 PM

I have problems walking up and talking to people period(well except online, guess its cause I'm not there in person)!! :lol: I cant say something at all without tripping over my own words unless they are a good friend. There have been many times I've liked someone but didnt have the nerve to go and just talk to them. :( I am a very shy person.

COMINATCHA

08-07-2006, 08:52 AM

I was going to make this a new thread, but I figured it might be better to stick it on the end of all the history behind it, so you kinda know what i'm talking about if you haven't read this already.

Ben just rang me, and I was stupid and answered it. I have this persistent habit of always forgiving people and trying to see the best in them when I probably shouldn't. Well not always, cause they dont deserve it after hurting me. The conversation went something like this...

Ben "Hey babe, how are ya?"

Me "Um, yea i'm okay...why are you calling me??"

Ben "I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for what I did, I didn't mean to hurt you babe and i'm really sorry. I can't get you out of my head, and I miss you so much, it's killing me."

Me "......it took you this long to decide that yea you actually like me?"

Ben "Baby, i'm sorry I upset you, I need to see you...can you come over?"

Me "No"

Ben "Are you mad at me babe?"

Me "You hurt me to the point where I cried. So yes I'm mad, and it will take me a while to forgive you."

Ben "But you will forgive me?"

Me "Maybe..."

Ben "I seriously can't stop thinking about you hey. If I could take back what I did then I would. I don't want to lose you babe."

Me "How do you know you haven't already lost me? I haven't forgiven you."

Ben "We should catch up in person, and talk about things properly. I want to hug you babe."

Me "I'll think about it..."

And the conversation carried on a bit, with me not having the guts to tell him to fuck off like all my friends are telling me to do. But a big part of me doesn't want to, and I actually DO want to see him again, and see how things go.

Am I being stupid? Should I give him another chance? It's stressing me out!

stormtreader

08-07-2006, 08:59 AM

so two weeks ago
He said "I need some time to think..."
and now suddenly he really misses you?

Sorry, but to me this reads like hes horny, and thought hed try his luck.

Ree

08-07-2006, 10:52 AM

Am I being stupid? Yes.

Go back and read this post again, http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showpost.php?p=7494&postcount=22 and then smarten the hell up, girl.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQBVVhf7TVY
"These Days

Promises are made to be broken
Haven't you heard?
He said he'd never break your heart
Now haven't you learned?
You believed in the words
In all that they meant
Oh, but love is not some popular song
Filled with empty sentiment

That's what passes for love
That's what passes for love these days

It won't take a miracle, darlin'
Just keep it real
This world can make us cynical, darlin'
I know how it feels
You took it to heart
What they said on the screen
Oh, but love is not just playing a part
In some very scripted scene

That's what passes for love
That's what passes for love these days

No one can complete you or make you whole
But love will come to greet you half way
Though the streets are never paved with gold

Promises are made to be broken
Haven't you heard?
He said he'd never break your heart
Now haven't you learned?
You believed in the words
In all that they meant
Oh, but love is not some popular song
Filled with empty sentiment

That's what passes for love
That's what passes for love
That's what passes for love these days

Ron Sexsmith"

COMINATCHA

08-07-2006, 12:11 PM

smarten the hell up, girl.[/I]

You didn't need to be mean about it...

Barefootgirl

08-07-2006, 12:56 PM

I don't think she was being mean. She was being realistic. You asked if you were being stupid, and I think you know it WOULD be stupid to go back with this guy, and Ree told it like it was. She gave you some very good advice a few pages back, about figuring out why you are attracted to these sprt of relationships, and why you enjoy the drama rather than the relationship. I don't know whether you read it or not.

If all you want is huggles, you shouldn't post openly. If you want people who are prepared to speak honestly and give you advice, you need to be prepared to hear advice that doesn't coddle you.

COMINATCHA

08-07-2006, 01:00 PM

Yea, and you can be realistic without using the word 'hell' which added that little sting to it. I'm not being a sook, I just think that if someone who wasn't a mod had said that, people would raise an eyebrow over it.

Barefootgirl

08-07-2006, 01:07 PM

I'm not backing Ree just because she's a mod, I'm backing her up because she said some sensible things and it seems the only reaction it provoked from you was a "woe is me she's so mean" one.

It takes a lot more thought and effort to write a constructive post, giving you advice on life, than it does to post some mindless "huggles" nonsense. People here have taken that time and effort to try and help you, and time and time again, you post about getting into bad situations - how do you think that makes the people who've taken time and effort to advise you feel?

I certainly don't think anyone should live their lives according to advice from a message board, but perhaps you need to remember that there are real people behind these posts and they do feel frustrated and aggravated by ANY individual who purports to ask for advice / support, but refuses to change their behaviour once they've received that advice & support.

Barefootgirl

08-07-2006, 01:07 PM

By the way, what is a sook?

COMINATCHA

08-07-2006, 01:11 PM

By the way, what is a sook?

Someone who gets upset and turns on the waterworks at the drop of a hat

COMINATCHA

08-07-2006, 01:17 PM

People here have taken that time and effort to try and help you, and time and time again, you post about getting into bad situations - how do you think that makes the people who've taken time and effort to advise you feel?

There has been SOOOO much advice given to me that I actually HAVE taken on board. Like, when I was having problems at work and said I wasn't happy being in a job based on my looks, Ree responded with 'then don't be,' and that little phrase really snapped me into action for some reason, and realised I CAN just quit, and I did.

So so many things you guys have said has really helped me. I am however, still learning as I grow up, and will probably continue to make mistakes. I may re-read this tomorow and think I over-reacted to the whole 'smarten the hell up girl' comment, i'm just a tad sensitive, so apologises to Ree when she reads all this and shakes her head in dissapointment and frustration at me!

NightWolf

08-07-2006, 02:12 PM

Typing is always hard to read sometimes. I perceived Ree's comment as something of a phrase she might normally say, or said lightly. I didn't really take it as snapping, but once again, typing like this is always hard to judge with no body langage and/or vocal tone. Which is why I tend to be overly nice about things on forums. I try my best to have fun but also not insult anyone accidentally.

Some people are more sensitive as you stated. Thats good. We need sensative people to balance out the rest of the insensitive morons. ;) Being sensitive in your case means you care and aren't afraid to show it. :angel:

Ree

08-07-2006, 09:22 PM

No offense was intended, Cominatcha, and I'm sorry if it was taken that way.

It was said out of frustration, because I read that post and I felt the pain you were expressing, but it most certainly wasn't said to be mean.
It completely boggles my mind that you would even consider giving this guy the time of day when he was so cruel.
To me, that says you don't feel that you are worthy of someone who will treat you better than that, and that makes me very sad for you.

JuniorMintz

08-08-2006, 06:15 AM

I've said this before, and I'll certainly say it again, but Ree is right, and she was right to word it the way she did. It got your attention, didn't it?

You'll probably think I'm being mean here and I hope you know me well enough to know that I don't *want* to come off that way, but if you don't want an honest answer from us (people who care about you!) then don't ask at all.

Real friends don't bullshit each other. They're honest even when it SUCKS and is brutal. A person who doesn't care, or only cares a little bit, will answer "You look great!" when asked. A real friend will be honest and tell you "You have broccoli in your teeth, that zit on your chin could use another dab of concealer, and you tucked your skirt into your knickers again. Do something about this!"

Ree is one of my dearest friends that I've never met in person, and it's because I know she cares about me that I've never been angry with her for setting me straight when I do or say something silly. Everyone on here knows me and knows I have a habit of shooting my mouth off and getting in trouble. If she didn't give a shit, she would say nothing and leave me to my own devices, and if I were suspended or banned, tough noogies. Point is, she DOES care, which is why she speaks up. It's what friends do!

Think about this-why are you so upset that an online friend said "hell" to you, but you're willing to go back to the same kinds of jerks over and over and OVER again who treat you like *shit* with a minimal amount of protest? Why would you A) Get as drunk as you say you do when hanging with people you don't know very well, and B) Let them leave you alone when you're sick/drunk? Why wasn't he holding the barf bucket, or at least bringing you ice water to settle your tummy before making sure you made it home safely? Good lord, you were worried that someone POISONED you, and now you're thinking about going back to him?!?

Do not put up with that kind of behavior, especially not from some idiot douchebag lout that would leave you when you're sick and vulnerable to go party with his idiot friends (who are clods themselves for *letting* him leave you!).

I've been reading your posts for quite a long time now, and I know I don't often reply because people like Ree and Cutenoob and co. tend to say what I'm thinking better than I can, so please don't mistake my silence for non concern. However, I've given serious thought to *not* reading the stories you write about your personal life anymore. Frankly, they're exhausting. It's like watching a scary movie where the pretty girl is about to open the door at the top of the stairs-you know, the *exact* room where the killer whatever is hiding, and you just want to scream at the TV screen 'DON'T GO IN THAT ROOM! DOOOOOOON'T! STOP! THAT'S WHERE THE KILLER-Aaaaah, damnit! Why the hell did you go in that room!"

Honestly, I don't care that much about that girl on the TV, but I care about you. You have a big heart, which is probably why it's broken so easily and why you're so willing to forgive those who have wronged you. I wish you the best and I hope things get better for you soon, I really do. However, things will NOT improve for you until *you* decide to make some serious changes in how you live and how you let others behave around you. You are pretty and kind and there is NO REASON WHATSOEVER for you to be feeling so bad about yourself all the time, especially not to the point where you'd consider wasting a single second of your life on some assclown pretty boy who has no idea how to treat a lady.

I hope you don't hate me after this, and if you do I'm sorry there was nothing I could do to prevent it. I have to be honest, and with my honesty comes my bluntness. If I were a liar, I'd do like Barefootgirl said and throw a "huggles!" or something your way.

So, now that I've talked waaaaaay too much, I'll end with this one last thing, and I'm screaming it at the top of my lungs in the hopes that you'll hear me all the way out in Aussie Land. You ready?

*inhales*

DO *NOT* GO IN THAT ROOM, COMI!!!

Ok? And take care of yourself!

*hugs, not huggles*