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View Full Version : Ya Wanker!


tenzilkem
12-11-2011, 07:37 PM
Have a couple of quick ones for ya

A lil background, I work for a cable company and when your bill becomes delinquent we stop the ability to order video on demand until a payment posts. End background

Had a customer pay her bill earlier that day but the payment hasn't posted and won't until midnight. She wants to order vod but until the money goes through it can't happen. She insists I hit a button and get it to work. Explained to her that I have no button to press its all an automated system with no way to speed it up. She then say "you wanker you will do it!" I tell her it's not a matter of won't but can't She lovingly ends the call with Bugger off!
Love ya too beeyotch!

And more of a general complaint than anything. Yes it's nice that the customer has bought a brand new tv state of the art everything but when it comes to setting up all the bells and whistles that involved the tv rather than cable, I cannot do anything but refer them to their manufacturer. Sweet Cthulhu have the decency to call the makers of the tv and don't get mad at me because I cannot set up your tv. I have no idea how to set the tv to give names to the hdmi ports! And screaming at me doesn't help me suddenly gain omniscience!

I want spading and neutering services offered when they get our cable!

Dave1982
12-11-2011, 07:48 PM
"you wanker you will do it!"

Considering that he's trying to order a pay per view on demand video, I somehow doubt that *you're* the wanker here. :p :roll:

Duncan MacLeod
12-12-2011, 04:49 AM
And more of a general complaint than anything. Yes it's nice that the customer has bought a brand new tv state of the art everything but when it comes to setting up all the bells and whistles that involved the tv rather than cable, I cannot do anything but refer them to their manufacturer. Sweet Cthulhu have the decency to call the makers of the tv and don't get mad at me because I cannot set up your tv. I have no idea how to set the tv to give names to the hdmi ports! And screaming at me doesn't help me suddenly gain omniscience!

I want spading and neutering services offered when they get our cable!

Sheesh. That feature is super easy and can be set up at any time via the menu. Or ya know read the manual. I am a techy though and i guess reading books is hard.

Seshat
12-12-2011, 11:58 AM
But it's a story about a man named Manuel, and has nothing to do with the TV!

emax4
12-12-2011, 01:47 PM
As far as setting up the TV, that's iffy, but I would think most companies might go ahead on instructing the user how to hook up his or her equipment of the place the customer is calling to, and that's it. The rep has to take into account the queue, the customer's grasp of the instructions given, any distractions in the customer's background, stuff like that.

When I was a rep at dish, I'd walk a person through hooking up their VCR to their satellite box on occasion. Most of the time it was a breeze, and I would explain the different methods and benefits of each type (S-video, component, RCA. etc). But if the person had a hard time getting what I was saying or the calls were backed up, I would refer them to a relative or neighbor that could do it for them.

Duncan, you made it a point for them to "Read the manual" :) I hear ya, but sometimes the issue is that the manual was written by techies for techies, so it's no more easier for the noob customer.

tenzilkem
12-12-2011, 03:02 PM
Making sure our equipment works with their tv we really don't have a problem with its the whole 3rd party settings we don't really touch. If we feel comfortable doing so than we can go a bit more but honestly I follow a line that was told to me by my instructor when I hired in almost 10 years ago, "If its not your button, don't press it" aka if its not ours dont do anything with it.

If its computer related which is my specialty then I am all game to try and help, tvs I'm less like to go much further.

Iseeyouthere
12-12-2011, 03:21 PM
I remember a story on here about a customer and this 'magic' button.

I think the best response is to hit a keyboard key loudly and say "I hit A button".

Redbeard
12-12-2011, 08:44 PM
Oh gods the Magic Button (tm)
That's right, if you work for a broadcast media company you too can make use of the Magic Button(tm)!
One press of the button will remove PPV blocks, lift blackouts, reactivate accounts without payment and even remove non pay disco collections accounts from your credit score!

Magic Button(tm) not affiliated with the Big Magic Make It Work(tm) switch that IT departments everywhere secretly have but refuse to use because it PISSES YOU OFF!

Golden Phoenix
12-13-2011, 04:58 PM
Oh gods the Magic Button (tm)
That's right, if you work for a broadcast media company you too can make use of the Magic Button(tm)!
One press of the button will remove PPV blocks, lift blackouts, reactivate accounts without payment and even remove non pay disco collections accounts from your credit score!

Magic Button(tm) not affiliated with the Big Magic Make It Work(tm) switch that IT departments everywhere secretly have but refuse to use because it PISSES YOU OFF!

When i worked in collections for Power corp apparently the magic button could also wibe overdue balances, cause a meter to suddenly appear in someone's house after we took it away, and in one memorable case, it could make the customer's ex-husband pay child support...that was a *nasty* call.

No, seriously, she demaned i make her ex husband pay child suport, not in a sarcastic "Well, if you can make him pay, i'll pay my bill" she actually told me to track him down, tell him to pay her child support, make sure he did it and then she'd pay the bill. She tried to give me his phone number, and her bank account details for him to pay it in to...wtf?!