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Major Psychotic Fucking Hatreds: Roadkill Edition

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  • Major Psychotic Fucking Hatreds: Roadkill Edition

    Yes, I'm totally jacking the title of the thread in the CS section. Forgive me. It's just that I discovered, or was not so graciously reminded of, my own psychotic fucking hatred just now. I went to work (for an hour, most pointless trip to work and back ever, thank you Mother Nature) and on the way back, there was a guy in a big white delivery type van on my ass. I mean he was glued to my bumper most of the drive home. Now, tailgating in general pisses me off. Tailgating when it's blowing snow, and the road is covered in ice and snow and getting worse? Psychotic fucking hatred. I cussed and yelled most of the way home. It took me fishtailing a bit to make him back off. Then, as I was making my turn off the highway to the road that leads into the town I live in, he was getting close again. I gave the guy plenty of warning with my turn signal. Back the fuck off, jackass!!!
    There... I feel better now that I vented. So what are YOUR psychotic fucking hatreds on the road?
    "And though she be but little, she is FIERCE!"--Shakespeare

  • #2
    Assholes who speed through residential communities. Bonus points if said residential community happens to have a lot of hills and twists.

    Some jerk nearly broad sided me because he was going way too fast over a hill (and my drive is just past the crest of the hill). I was lucky enough to spot the very top of his SUV cresting and slammed my brakes.

    Slow the fuck down, assholes.
    My Writing Blog -Updated 05/06/2013
    It's so I can get ideas out of my head, I decided to put it in a blog in case people are bored or are curious as to the (many) things in progress.

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    • #3
      You know, there was a story in the local paper about someone who did that, ran a light, and DID broad side a pick up, hard enough to flip it over. Just plain stupid, really. Wow.
      "And though she be but little, she is FIERCE!"--Shakespeare

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      • #4
        Quoth AmbrosiaWriter View Post
        Assholes who speed through residential communities.
        Whenever I see or hear about this I always flash back to the scene in 'The World According to Garp' where T.S. chases one down on foot for doing so.

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        • #5
          Mine: People who speed along the passing lane despite the fact that there are cars in both lanes already going at a good speed.

          Cos first off... when there's traffic already there, where do they think they'll go?

          Second... many aggressive drivers do this on purpose to intimidate people out of their way. even when there's nowhere for the other cars to go.

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          • #6
            Quoth AmbrosiaWriter View Post
            Assholes who speed through residential communities.
            Corollary-- Assholes who want the world to know how small their dick is by REVVING THEIR ENGINES AT FULL VOLUME. Whether they're in some modded-up dickbox car or a crotch-rocket motorcycle, they disturb the whole freakin' neighborhood.

            Bonus points if they do it after dark or in the wee hours.
            PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

            There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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            • #7
              People who use empty merging or disappearing lanes to pass, because they can't be bothered otherwise.
              You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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              • #8
                Quoth BrenDAnn View Post
                You know, there was a story in the local paper about someone who did that, ran a light, and DID broad side a pick up, hard enough to flip it over. Just plain stupid, really. Wow.
                Shit, I've seen a motorcycle hit a pickup truck hard enough to flip it on its side.
                Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                • #9
                  My most hated move is when someone behind me is yelling at me or honking at me for not making the left turn after the signal goes green. Now, I no longer drive a tall van, so I KNOW they can see the oncoming traffic. Do they want me to turn into oncoming traffic and kill someone? Why are people so stupid? There's a little something called physics at work. Ah, and there is a snow storm today. I don't want to go out, but need to.
                  "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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                  • #10
                    Here's another one: The No-Right-Pedal People, aka the Nestoring Bastards.

                    I get that some people are just not comfortable with speeding, and drive to the speed limit. But the assholes who drive UNDER the speed limit... and do it in the left hand lane?

                    FUCK YOU ALL.
                    PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                    There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth Jay 2K Winger View Post
                      But the assholes who drive UNDER the speed limit... and do it in the left hand lane?
                      I'll admit to sometimes driving under the speed limit but only under certain circumstances;

                      A) It's really late at night, I'm tired, so I just naturally drive slower to accommodate for my dulled reaction time.

                      B) I don't know where the HELL I am and I'm looking for a specific road and I don't know how soon the turn is coming.

                      I always feel a bit guilty about scenario B though.
                      My Writing Blog -Updated 05/06/2013
                      It's so I can get ideas out of my head, I decided to put it in a blog in case people are bored or are curious as to the (many) things in progress.

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                      • #12
                        Nah, Ambrosia, no guilt needed. My Dad (a trucker for longer than I'v been alive) always tells me never, ever to let people intimidate me into going faster than I'm comfortable with. Now, I'm normally a good 5 to 10 mph above the speed limit, if the roads and weather permit it anyway, but still. They don't like my speed? They can pass me. End of story.
                        "And though she be but little, she is FIERCE!"--Shakespeare

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Jay 2K Winger View Post
                          Here's another one: The No-Right-Pedal People, aka the Nestoring Bastards.

                          I get that some people are just not comfortable with speeding, and drive to the speed limit. But the assholes who drive UNDER the speed limit... and do it in the left hand lane?

                          FUCK YOU ALL.
                          Got stuck behind one of those last night on the way back from Culvers. Old man in a big car, doing 20 mph in the left lane on a 30 mph street.

                          I passed him on the right . Whatevs. Sell the car and buy a Hoveround if you're that scared to move.

                          Speaking of Culvers: See the sign by the kerb that says "Please pull forward to last available space? That means.....PULL THE FUCK FORWARD TO THE LAST AVAILABLE SPACE, YOU ASSHEAD.

                          Not "pull forward a little bit and clog up the drive-thru so nobody can move."

                          Not "sit at the window because you think this is McDonalds where they hand you the food through the window."

                          People driving large vans are particularly good for this. It makes me wonder, are you stupid because you drive a large van, or do you drive a large van because you're stupid?
                          Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                          "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                          • #14
                            Tailgaters, whether it's snowing or not. Get off my bumper, dude. If I had rear pointing 50 cals, I'd use em, and I'm usually a very tolerant old lady...

                            People who drive at 20-30 below the speed limit when there's one lane each way, but can manage to hit the speed limit quite happily when somebody tries to pass them when a second lane opens up.

                            People who do not check who is beside them when they go to change lanes. Particularly if I'm on my bike. You might have steel around you but I don't, so bloody look first!

                            People who use the SMIDSY defence when they nearly kill you in traffic. (Sorry, mate, I didn't see you.) If you can't see the frikkin flouro orange motorcycle right in front of you, you obviously weren't looking, then, were you? And maybe you should get your vision checked too. 'Didn't see'? Didn't look, more like...

                            People who assume the big red Landrover is slow, but can somehow brake on a dime. Umm, NO! It goes quick enough, thank you very much, but it does take a bit to stop on the off-road tyres. So when I leave a gap in traffic, it's so I don't end up parked in your boot space after you cut me off and then brake hard. Numbskulls. I can pretty much guarantee that my bull bar is harder than your rear bumper, and I'm sure my vehicle will end up in better condition than your little Korean buzzbox.

                            And finally, the biggest, most psychotic hatred of all - people in cars or large 4x4s hassling learner motorcyclists. Back the hell off. Leave them some space. Don't pretend to try to side swipe them - one day you may well missjudge and do some real harm. Don't try to push them to go faster, or to drop a mono, or anything else that's likely to get them smeared across the tarmac. Let them do their thing, give them room to do it, and mind your own frikkin bees wax.

                            (Phew, that was quite cathartic!!! Thanks OP!)

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                            • #15
                              Most of mine relate to people who can't drive, but then turn around and demand tougher conditions for learner and probationary drivers.

                              As for the others...

                              -people who drive in fog without their lights on. Are you TRYING to get us all killed?
                              -people who do not follow the right of way rule when merging: if the car next to you is at least a third in front, you let them go ahead.
                              -people who pull a u-turn in a no u-turn zone. News flash dumbasses, the sign is there for a reason! (Double fail if there is a lane further up or down the road and they don't use it)
                              -people who don't use their indicators when turning at all.
                              -people who tailgate me because they missed the speed limit sign. This happens to me nearly every single time I go to see my boyfriend.
                              The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                              Now queen of USSR-Land...

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