Seraph vs.... A Stick

[Seraph]

Stick won.

For Easter, I managed to slightly impale my calf onto a stick. Best part was that my husband didn't understand what was going on, and proceeded to walk away without me. And then stopped halfway across the field we were traversing, asked what happened, and then continued again.

And then stopped on the other side of the field and asked "Wait, does this mean you want a first aid kit?"

After waiting about five minutes, I realized he wasn't coming back, even though I'd replied in the affirmative, LOL. So I hobbled across the field to his grandma's house, after pulling the stick out (stupid thing ruined my one good pair of khaki pants too!), and kinda flopped in the hallway, whimpering.

Hubby's grandma proceeded to march me to the bathroom, for first aid.

- slightly squicky part, highlight for it-

where she pulled the puncture open and then poured hydrogen peroxide straight in. That was both painful and extremely weird feeling, with all the bubbles forming INSIDE THE CALF. /geh

During it all, she told me to suck it up, she'd seen worse. Hardcore grandma is hardcore!

Stick only went in a little over half an inch, maaaaybe 3/4", by my guess, can't really tell, but its painful as get out.

I did, however, go back for said stick (was easy to find, it had blood on it, LOL), and proceeded to smack it against a tree trunk to break it out of revenge.


....wherein one of the pieces ricocheted off and pinged me in the face. :<



STUPID STICKS.

[KiaKat]

It is a Stick of Ebil and must be DESTROYED.

You must take it to the fires of Mount Doom and dispose of it there.

[LillFilly]

It is a Stick of Ebil and must be DESTROYED.

You must take it to the fires of Mount Doom and dispose of it there.

Sooo, did you burn it or feed it to a beaver afterward? Hmm, but then the beaver might get a taste for blood and become mutant killer beaver!

[Seraph]

Hmm, but then the beaver might get a taste for blood and become mutant killer beaver!

And then it will BITE YOU IN THE LEG.

[lordlundar]

To start off with, . That must have hurt.

Second, (and I say this with care and sincerity) Seraph, you are a KLUTZ!

[Seraph]

Second, (and I say this with care and sincerity) Seraph, you are a KLUTZ!

Understatement of the Year 2012.

[Dytchdoctir]

I did, however, go back for said stick (was easy to find, it had blood on it, LOL), and proceeded to smack it against a tree trunk to break it out of revenge.

When I started to read this part, I thought you were going to say you went to get the stick in order to whack your husband upside the head with it.

[Jay 2K Winger]

Second, (and I say this with care and sincerity) Seraph, you are a KLUTZ!

She serves up so much PWNAGE on a regular basis that the Law of Averages states the deficiencies must come somewhere.

I give you: Seraph, Enemy of Nature.

[Seraph]

That would explain why nature has tried to kill me on so many occasions... <.<

[sms001]

Sooo, did you burn it or feed it to a beaver afterward?

Yes, because her first two encounters with the stick went SO well!

[Seraph's Area News:]

"A local woman was found cowering in a drainage ditch, surrounded by rabid beavers, apparently in an effort to avoid immolation after her attempt at burning A STICK went awry, resulting in a county-wide brush fire. Film at 11."

Hope you heal quickly S, and Go Team Grandma!

[DeltaSierra]

Evil stick indeed! So glad it wasn't worse - I had a piece of bamboo as thick as my thumb go several inches up my thigh last summer (there's a thread about it here).

Keep it clean!

[Nurian]

I'm sorry, Seraph. This is what I thought of when I read this

Forgive me!

[Seraph]

[Seraph's Area News:]

"A local woman was found cowering in a drainage ditch, surrounded by rabid beavers, apparently in an effort to avoid immolation after her attempt at burning A STICK went awry, resulting in a county-wide brush fire. Film at 11."

I just about fell out of my chair laughing.

I'm sorry, Seraph. This is what I thought of when I read this

Forgive me!

D: NOT MY EYES!

[Seshat]

For future reference, re puncture wounds:

* Leave the object in the wound. I'm not kidding: the object can be blocking an otherwise damaged blood vessel. Also, the act of removing the object tells the doctor how deep the wound is, and what infectious substances might have entered the body.

* Wrap enough bandaging or clean fabric around the wound to keep the puncturing object still and blood flow slowed if not stopped.

* Take patient directly to a doctor.

Source: 'Australian First Aid' by St Johns' Ambulance. As filtered by me. Also, it's an old edition. If Panacea or one of our other medicos gives updated advice, believe them instead.


See, the problem with puncture wounds is that they can have deep infections, rather than surface infections. Most people can treat everyday surface infections with no problems - which is why I don't bother with the above for splinters and other 'puncture' injuries that don't fully break the skin.


Anyway: Seraph? Hon? I'm pretty sure you live in the US so this might be costlier advice than you would like, but ... take the wound to a doctor. Please!

[Seraph]

For future reference, re puncture wounds:

* Leave the object in the wound. I'm not kidding: the object can be blocking an otherwise damaged blood vessel. Also, the act of removing the object tells the doctor how deep the wound is, and what infectious substances might have entered the body.

<snippers>

Anyway: Seraph? Hon? I'm pretty sure you live in the US so this might be costlier advice than you would like, but ... take the wound to a doctor. Please!

You'd think after reading Where the Red Fern Grows, I'd know that first part. /facepalm

And yeah, taking it to the doc would be extremely costly to us right now, so unfortunately....gonna wing it for a bit. I've been keeping the wound clean, and monitoring closely for any redness or soreness, beyond the whole "ouchies, fresh-ish wound" thing. I've had a surprisingly disturbing amount of infected cuts/wounds/gashes before, so thankfully, I know what signs to keep an eye out for. And I promise you, if any of them so much as PEEP, I'm heading to a doc.