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Genius of the day
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Old 07-26-2006, 11:29 PM
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Linda Linda is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: South Wales, UK
Posts: 144
Default Genius of the day

This just made my morning.
Where I work, we hire out carpet cleaning machines. The customer books a machine, pays a deposit and pays for the machine hire, goes home, cleans their carpets and returns the machine the next day.

Customer (from about 10 metres away from me): Yoo-hoo! Anyone there?
Me (stood at the counter in full view - I could tell this was going to go well): Good Morning. How can I help you?
Cust: Do you do that carpet cleaning thingy?
Me: Yes, we do. Do you need inform...
Cust: Oh good! I'll just get my husband.

So I think she's going to get her husband so they can work out a date for booking the machine. While she's gone I go to get the diary ready to book the hire.

About 5 minutes later, she returns, with husband in tow. And a very very large package. Huge. Uh-oh.

Genius had taken up the carpet in her living room. All 144 square feet of it. And had brought it to me to clean.

Cust: So. I've got the carpet What happens now?
Me: Well...we don't clean the carpets here. You hire the machine, take it home and do it yourself. While the carpets are still in place.
Cust: You mean I spent all last night moving out my furniture and taking up the carpet for you to say NO? Now what am I supposed to do?
Me: Well...you could put the carpet back and book the cleaning machine.
Cust: I'm not doing that! It doesn't say I have to do it myself! (huffs).
(well, no, apart from the big sign saying so and the common sense aspect)
Cust: Fine. Do you clean rugs?
Me: (I know where this is going...) ...yes.
Cust: Well...this is just a big rug then. Can you put it in as a rug?
Me: I could...but it's a much better option to hire the machine and clean it yourself.
Cust: No. I'm not cleaning it myself! Now how much would it cost to clean it as a rug.
Me: Around 250. With a 4 week turn around, and no guarantees our cleaning centre can clean it.
Cust: And what sort of service do you call that? Your machine hire is 13.99 so I want it done for that price. And I need it back for the weekend. I have visitors.
Me: No. (big smile) Not possible I'm afraid.
Cust:
Me: You could try <big dry cleaning centre down the road> But I'm sure they won't be able to offer anything different. And as they don't hire machines, they'll just send you back to us. (we have a very good relationship with them and share idiot customers)

What a genius! To her husband's credit he was trying to pull her away from the counter...
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