Dear Abby deals with Sucky Customers....sorta.

[Hon'ya-chan]

http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20070618

[Catwoman2965]

I saw this too - what I'm wondering, since a lot of stores will NOT return unwanted gifts for cash, only store credit, is how successful they were in getting the cash they so desperately and greedily wanted. I really hope they had a rude awakening when they found out getting the cash back isn't as easy as they thought! I'd love to see a follow-up on this one!

I can't believe the nerve of some people. Friends of mine are getting married soon, and while they have registered for a few things, they also have partnered with a charity, and if people choose to do so, they can make a donation to that charity in lieu of buying a gift for them. Which i think is a nice idea...they own a house together, so they don't need much, and at the same time, are giving back, rather than taking as much as they can get.

[tollbaby]

Geez, they could have just done what we did. I'd been on my own for.... seven years when I got married, so I already had all the household stuff I needed, and we made pretty decent money, so I simply added to the bottom of my homemade invitations, "We realize that the tradition is to offer a gift to the bride and groom. However, since we have been blessed with everything we need or want, the pleasure of your company on the evening of our wedding is all the gift we could want."

I verbally passed the word that charitable donations to the charity of their choice would be considered an appropriate gift if they really wanted to give us one.... We still ended up with about $2,000 in cash *sigh* So, not being people to look a gift horse in the mouth, we donated some of it and spent the rest to build ourselves a computer (we had an older one, but it was quite old).

[Strange Magic]

Abby gave good advice. I know I would not go to the wedding after being told right to my face that my gift blows dead bears.

[justZu]

my gift blows dead bears.

OK, I am picturing Towlie(from South Park) blowing a cartoon dead bear...it must be getting late.

Time to shut off the computer and get some sleep.

[Kiwi]

ok seriously, the second letter about the infected you know what

that is just GROSSSSSSSS I would be really upset to, I dont want to know about my co-workers whatsit!

EWWWW

[GyroKat]

I don't think I understand this whole "registering" thing? Where I come from, wedding gifts are a bit like Christmas or birthday gifts, except usually a bit more expensive since they're for 2 people. It's mostly household items, or stuff that would otherwise be useful to the new couple. You also only get gifts from close friends and family, and maybe a thing from your boss if you're really lucky or something.

I guess it depends on what country you live in, until a short while ago, I had no idea what the heck "baby showers" were, or why people did that. We don't have anything like it in Denmark.

[Hon'ya-chan]

I don't think I understand this whole "registering" thing? Where I come from, wedding gifts are a bit like Christmas or birthday gifts, except usually a bit more expensive since they're for 2 people. It's mostly household items, or stuff that would otherwise be useful to the new couple. You also only get gifts from close friends and family, and maybe a thing from your boss if you're really lucky or something.

Think of it this way then:

Instead of being surprised like during Christmas or a Birthday, you give out a list of stuff you want, and you at least know what you could get.

Also, Instead of using the Uber Expensive Wedding Gifts given to you to use in the home, you take them back to the store and exchange them for Cash Money.

[GyroKat]

So, basically handing out wishlists? But then I don't understand the letter, where the woman says "Honey, we should have registered for that so we could return it for the cash!"

I understood it as some sort of special offer where you could easier return items if they were part of your wishlist or something like that. But I guess that the woman just meant that they should have wished for the vacuum cleaner because it is expensive.

I find it incredibly rude to wish for expensive stuff just to return it for cash though. If there's nothing I want for my birthday, I will usually tell people that I'd rather have cash or gift cards to some of my preferred stores, if they ask.

[XCashier]

During the dinner, Ron and Barbie blatantly informed us that they had registered for expensive shower items (I had attended the shower) so they could return the gifts for cash....If that wasn't enough, they were complaining about some blue towels they had received that they had not registered for. Barbie said they hated them and had returned them. Want to guess what my shower gift was? The blue towels, of course.

Shameful. Obviously, their mums didn't teach them about gratitude or good manners.

I don't think I understand this whole "registering" thing?

How it's supposed to work is, the bride and groom (or mother-to-be, for a baby shower) goes to a specific store (for example, Target) and pick out what they need or want for their house, including colors and patterns, and put their choices in a computer registry. When the guests go to the store to buy the wedding gift, they print out the registry, pick out a gift from the list, and when they buy it, the computer removes it from the registry so another guest doesn't buy it.

I generally don't have a problem with this, as it gives the guests a good idea of what to get and prevents the recipients from getting multiples of one item, or something in a color or pattern they don't like. However, to use it as a money-making scheme is just rude and tacky. Even ruder and tackier is boasting about it, like they think they're so clever.

[AFpheonix]

I just used my wedding registry as a general idea for people to know what we did and didn't need already.

Some of my best gifts were ones that people picked out or made themselves, including several paintings and a top of the line Hudson Bay wool blanket

[SnapAddict218]

"We realize that the tradition is to offer a gift to the bride and groom. However, since we have been blessed with everything we need or want, the pleasure of your company on the evening of our wedding is all the gift we could want."

THANK YOU TOLLBABY. I've wondered how to tactfully request that myself.

[air914]

We registered - and hardly got anything we registered for. We did get some money, which my husband was very happy about. The weirdest gift we got was from relatives of his - a HUGE yellow ugly industrial boom-box/radio thing . I have NO idea what they were thinking....... it's like they ran into a store last minute and just grabbed something.

Our wedding was kinda strange w/ people - most of the guests were from out of town and they brought gifts. So not only did they pay for their travel expenses & hotel, but they brought gifts. It was some of the local people that didn't bring gifts at all - some didn't even bring a card. That just seems a little rude to me..... you get an expensive dinner and a night of entertainment and it's customary to bring a gift......maybe I'm being selfish....

The worst were the people that told us "we should invite them b/c they give good gifts - it was just awkward... and we invited them" and then they didn't bring a gift or card at all...... Or the ones that "invited themselves" by basically saying - "Oh I didn't get an invitation, when is the wedding?" and then after we'd made a table for them and ordered them food - they no showed. No apologizes, no card - nothing.

Ooh one of my favorites though - I wrote thank you cards and for the ones that didn't give gifts I just wrote "thank you for coming and being a part of our special day" - you know, real generic. This one woman gave us a gift like a month after the wedding and said she had "forgotten" to bring it to the wedding..... or send it to our address........ and it was a big silver bowl that I had NO use for...... no place to store... and I'm pretty sure it was used.... I know it's supposed to be the thought that counts.... but I'm not quite sure I follow that thought.........

Weddings are funny

[Hon'ya-chan]

We registered - and hardly got anything we registered for. We did get some money, which my husband was very happy about. The weirdest gift we got was from relatives of his - a HUGE yellow ugly industrial boom-box/radio thing . I have NO idea what they were thinking....... it's like they ran into a store last minute and just grabbed something.

By chance, did they drive or does the Boombox have the words JEEP anywhere on it?

[iradney]

Or the ones that "invited themselves" by basically saying - "Oh I didn't get an invitation, when is the wedding?" and then after we'd made a table for them and ordered them food - they no showed. No apologizes, no card - nothing.

If/When I get married, people like that will be given a firm, but gentle "No. Only close friends and family are coming to the wedding as we want to keep it a small, intimate affair."
If you cannot even tell me what tattoos I have, you're not invited. If you don't know my full name (and only close friends do), you're not invited. I am NOT going to page through my album a few years later and wonder "who the F*%& are all these people and what are they doing at my wedding???"
Bitchy? Maybe. But it's a day that TTO and I want to share with those that love us and know us well, not Joe Soap from accounting.