50 things restaurant servers should never do

[Mnemjian]

21. Never serve anything that looks creepy or runny or wrong.

Um... I guess that's a good idea? Some of these make sense, some are common sense, but most I am not nearly uppity enough to appreciate...

It's the New York Times. The whole debate involves people who are probably richer than shit and used to being waited on hand and foot.

QFT! And I do wonder if the writer of this article ever had the "pleasure" of working in the customer service industry. I know it's a generalization, but I bet a lot of rich people nodded furiously whilst reading this article

It was hilarious to read the Waiter Rant responses, though. Thanks for posting that!

[KiaKat]

OOooOO I can address some of these. And oh Deity this is long.

Skimmed the whole article, I'll comment on a few of the bits that stood out.

1. Red wine: Red wine has a tendency (because it's frequently served at 10+ years old) to throw sediment. There is a Proper Way to deal with the sediment and keep it from making it into the customer's glass. It involves a candle, a white tablecloth, and a special serving basket to get the wine from the cellar to the table. There's a whole setup, and it's a pain in the ass when you're not a professional sommelier. However, places that are SERVING that kind of wine usually have a sommelier to handle JUST the wine. If the waiter is handling the wine, it's not a nice enough list to warrant most of the wine-based rules.
--Corollary: Not everyone wants to pour their own wine, and some people prefer to pour their own wine. Therefore it's always best to ask the guest whether they would prefer the wine to be poured. This applies to *all* wines, not just red. I'm not entirely certain why he only applies it to red.

2. Fresh glasses: YES YES YES YES YES. If I'm out to a nice dinner, and I switch from a Cote de Beaune for befores to a Medoc for the main course, I WANT A NEW DAMNED GLASS. Hell, if it's a new bottle, I want a new glass. I do NOT want the previous wine mixing with what I'm currently drinking, as it will likely change the flavour.
-----note this is ONLY for when I'm out to dinner or hosting a formal party. If I'm at home, I usually use the same glass.

3. Champagne: In order to ensure EVERYONE'S safety, as well as preserve the sparkle to the wine, there is a Proper Way to open a sparkling bottle, whether it be Champagne, Prosecco, Cava, American Sparkling, or Cremant. It involves NOT removing the basket from the cork, twisting the bottle rather than the cork, and easing the cork out slowly. This will keep the wine from spilling, the cork from hitting someone in the eye, and the carbonation intact.

4. Proper Service: There's a reason for all of the Formal Dining tips the author is giving, including the bit about touching guests (HUGE no-no, as you're invading their personal space), not flirting (best to remain professional, as one is never certain if the guest is going to be offended), and complementing clothes, hair, or style of one guest. You *never* know how a guest will react, and it's best to just keep the peace.
--Addendum: Also, the bit about removing plates? NEVER remove a plate from the table unless all guests are finished eating and have placed their silverware down. Otherwise you are rushing the remaining guests, and the one whose plate was removed looks uncouth (and feels awkward) for having no plate in front of them.
--ETA: And stacking at the table? OH HELL NO. Never. Never never never never never. It's dirty, you're likely to spill food on yourself, the floor, or the guest, and it makes an awful noise.

I think those are my big points. He gets a bit specific at moments, and most of his tips are for the highest of the high-end dining, but...this is New York City. The list applies to several restaurants I used to frequent with some regularity, and most of them test their servers regularly on waitstaff etiquette.

And trust me, the "secret diners" in fine dining are a hell of a lot more arbitrary and difficult than "secret shoppers" are in retail. These restaurants have an image to portray, for various reasons. A great example is the Gramercy Tavern. In one week they're likely to have several major business deals signed, a number of celebrities desiring quiet and sane dining with no gushing fans, and probably some European royalty drop a few thousand dollars.

Lucky me got raised with all these rules, so I was able to step right into service. And I'll never do it again. The stress is hellish.

[lordlundar]

and part 2 is up on waiter rant.