Extremely wrong answers to obvious questions....GAME!

[DGoddessChardonnay]

7's! And luck will be a laddie tonight.

Why do I hear crying in my head?

Those are the brain cells calling out to save them from the endless stupidity.

Why did Jimmy crack corn?

[BookstoreEscapee]

I don't care.

Why won't my3cents work for me?

[XCashier]

Inflation.

Why does my internet connection slow to a crawl when I need it to move at a decent pace?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Inflation.

Why does my internet connection slow to a crawl when I need it to move at a decent pace?

Because where you're moving it to is not where the Internet wants to be.

If your hands itch, it means you're supposed to come into some money. But what does it mean when your neck itches?

[CaroPhoenix]

You're allergic to your girlfriend's lipstick.

If I were a basket of strawberry jam, where would I hide?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

You're allergic to your girlfriend's lipstick.

If I were a basket of strawberry jam, where would I hide?

The Witless Protection Program . . .

Is there any way to keep the rain away tomorrow?

[CaroPhoenix]

Cover your entire area with umbrellas.

How do you keep a turkey from drying out?

[Wingates_Hellsing]

Throw it to the sharks, every shredded bit will be perfectly moist with seawater.

Why does everyone at the airsoft field shoot for the head?

[CaroPhoenix]

Because anywhere else would be too easy.

Where are my shoes?

[XCashier]

Carmen Sandiego took them.

Where do you want to go today?

[SengaKitty]

Work, if only

Will I get a job this week?

[Jack T. Chance]

Work, if only

Will I get a job this week?

Only if you're fully prepared to ask suggest "You want fries with that" for a living!

When will I-I be loved?

[CaroPhoenix]

When you're the second to the last man on earth.

Who am I to say otherwise?

[SengaKitty]

Carmen Sandiego

Who's afraid of the big bad wolf?

[Wingates_Hellsing]

Not me, I'm rockin the DEagle

Who put that box in the road?