Wish Corruption! (Game thread)

[Magpie]

Granted! The neighbourhood cats love the buffet.

I wish my laundry as done.

[lobo94]

Granted-the dryer caught fire and burned your clothes to ashes.

I wish it would cool down, temperaturewise.

[Magpie]

Granted! Shame about the frost killing most of the local crops.

I wish my friend's wandering jew wasn't taking over the shelf we put it on.

[Green_Fairy]

granted! instead it parts the red curtains and leads all the other plants to freedom

i wish i had a bigger car

[BookstoreEscapee]

granted! instead it parts the red curtains and leads all the other plants to freedom

i wish i had a bigger car

Granted! Here are the keys to your shiny new 18-wheeler.

I wish there was a way to magically receive the things that I want by just asking for them.

[hinakiba777]

Granted! But Wednesday you will be really frustrated and say "somebody kill me" and an axe wielding maniac will murder you.

I wish my teeth would stop hurting, but I do not want them to fall out or rot or anything.

[ZedOmega]

You wake up one day to find out that your teeth are no longer bothering you, but someone was nice enough to leave the syringe full of morphine in your arm.

I wish NASCAR had more crashes.

[lobo94]

Granted-all of NASCAR's computers go down!

I wish I had a case of Java Monster's Russian coffee drink.

[Green_Fairy]

granted! but it's totally rancid and would kill you if you drank it

i wish i had a new belt

[ZedOmega]

Sure thing. But what're you gonna do with a conveyor belt?

I wish these updates would finish downloading so I can sleep.

[Magpie]

Granted. But tomorrow you discover that they were corrupted, and you have to spend two days downloading them again.

I wish my expense claim form was easier to understand.

[Dave1982]

Granted. But tomorrow you discover that they were corrupted, and you have to spend two days downloading them again.

I wish my expense claim form was easier to understand.

Granted. It now simply reads "All employees are responsible for their own expenses."

I wish I had a delicious hamburger.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Granted! But the bun is gross.

I wish my parents would stop IMing me the second I turn on the computer every day. We are not in the same room, or even in the same town, you don't need to acknowledge my presence the second I appear.

[lobo94]

Granted-you have been replaced by your duplicate from a parallell universe...an evil duplicate.

I wish I had more tolerance for fools, jerks, and sucky customers.

[Magpie]

Granted. The lynch mob will be after you shortly for encouraging those people.

I wish I hadn't overdone my knee exercises. (Quite counter-productive that).