A creation story

[edible_hat]

On the first day,
God created the dog and said:
'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone
who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life
span of twenty years.'

The dog said:
'That's a long time to be barking. how about only ten years
and I'll give you back the other ten?'

So God agreed

On the second day,
God created the monkey and said:
'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh.
For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'

The monkey said:
'Monkey tricks for twenty years?
That's a pretty long time to perform.
How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'

And God agreed .

On the third day,
God created the cow and said:
'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long
and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to
support the farmer 's family.

For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.'

The cow said:
'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.
How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said:
'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this,
I'll give you twenty years.'

But the human said:
'Only twenty years?
Could you possibly give me my twenty,
the forty the cow gave back,
the ten the monkey gave back, and
the ten the dog gave back;
that makes eighty, okay?'

'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep,
play and enjoy ourselves.
For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.
For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.
And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

[Broomjockey]

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep,
play and enjoy ourselves.
For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.
For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.
And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

As funny as this story is, and it is pretty funny, it falls apart when you realize the stupid amounts of homework being shovelled out on students starting at an earlier and earlier age. Plus the first few years of being a poop factory. In light of this, I propose an amendment.

10 years of eat sleep and enjoy one's self, then the 40 years of working hard is spliced in with monkey tricks to kiss up to superiors, then we get another 10 years of fun, then comes the barking, which is also fun for some people