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  • Rabbit in a pub

    A rabbit walks into a pub and says to the barman, 'Can I have a pint of beer and a Ham and Cheese Toastie?'. The barman is amazed but gives the rabbit a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. The rabbit drinks the beer and eats the toastie, he then leaves.

    The following night the rabbit returns and again asks for a Pint of Beer and a Ham and Cheese Toastie. The barman, now intrigued by the rabbit and the extra drinkers in the pub (because word gets round) gives the rabbit the pint and the toastie. The rabbit consumes them and leaves.

    The next night, the pub is packed, in walks the rabbit and says 'A pint of beer and a Ham and Cheese Toastie, please barman'. The crowd is hushed as the barman gives the rabbit his pint and toastie and then burst into applause as the rabbit wolfs them down.

    The next night there is standing room only in the pub, coaches have been laid on for the crowds of patrons attending, the barman is making more money in one week than he did all last year. In walks the rabbit and says, 'A Pint of Beer and a Ham and Cheese Toastie, please barman', smiling and accepting the tributes of the masses. The barman says, 'I'm sorry rabbit, old mate, old mucker but we are right out of them Ham and Cheese Toasties'.

    The rabbit looks aghast, the crowd has quietened to almost a whisper, when the barman clears his throat nervously and says, 'We do have a very nice Cheese and Onion Toastie'. The rabbit looks him in the eye and says, 'Are you sure I will like it?' The masses bated breath is ear shatteringly silent. The barman, with a roguish smile says 'Do you think that I would let down one of my best friends, I know you'll love it'. 'Ok' says the rabbit,' I'll have a Pint of Beer and a Cheese and Onion Toastie'. The pub erupts with glee as the rabbit quaffs the beer and guzzles the toastie, he then waves to the crowd and leaves....

    .......NEVER TO RETURN!!!!!!

    One year later in the now impoverished public house, the barman (who has only served 4 drinks tonight, 3 of which were his) calls time. When he is cleaning down the now empty bar, he sees a small white form, floating above the bar. The barman says, 'Who are you' To which he is answered, 'I am the ghost of the rabbit that used to frequent your public house'. The barman says, 'I remember you, you made me famous, you would come in every night and have a Pint of Beer and a Ham and Cheese Toastie, masses came to see you and this place was famous' The rabbit says, 'Yes I know'.. The barman said, 'I remember, on your last night we didn't have any Ham and Cheese Toasties, you had a Cheese and Onion one instead' The rabbit said 'Yes, you promised me that I would love it'. The barman said 'You never came back, what happened?'

    'I DIED', said the Rabbit.

    'NO!' said the barman,'what from'.
    After a short pause. The rabbit said...







    'Mixin'-me-toasties'
    "I can tell her you're all tied up in the projection room." Sunset Boulevard.

  • #2
    I don't get it....
    "Hi, this is Silver. How may I lose my self respect in order to cater to your over- inflated ego today?" --- Silverrb

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    • #3
      sounds like...

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      • #4
        Quoth SilverOrb View Post
        I don't get it....
        Myxomatosis

        Rabbit disease.
        What if Humans are just Dire Halflings?

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        • #5
          I had no idea that rabbit diseases were so well-known that jokes are now being made about them.

          If you have to ask, it's probably better posted at www.fratching.com

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          • #6
            Quoth Boozy View Post
            I had no idea that rabbit diseases were so well-known that jokes are now being made about them.
            It depends on where you are... in Australia and New Zealand where rabbits are introduced pests, myxomatosis has been deliberately released in an attempt to kill them off. It resulted in stronger, myxomatosis-proof rabbits.

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            • #7
              ... that have learnt to speak, and taken a liking to beer and Ham and Cheese toasties.
              When I said "From my research", what I actually meant to say was "Made shit up" - from a thottbot thread

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              • #8
                you know...instead of rabbits being reared in abusive breeding environments for profit to breeders and for american entertainment, why don't we import austrailian rabbits and kill two birds with one stone...but wait, that'd be LOGICAL...

                another animal joke:

                (to make things easier, the chicken's words are to be clucked while the frog's words are to be croaked...works better live...)

                So one day a chicken walks into a library, and says "book?" so the librarian hands him a book (because there is no rule against animals reading). The next day the chicken returns the book and goes "Book-book?" and the librarian hands the chicken two more books, a bit more puzzled than the day before. The next day the chicken once more comes in, returning the first two books and going "book-book-book?" and once again the librarian hands the chicken the books. The librarian's curiosity won, and she followed the chicken to see where the chicken was going with the books. the chicken wandered down the street, out past the towns limits, and onto a dirt road. the chicken kept walking and all of a sudden veered off into the woods, where the chicken came to a stump. a frog was sitting on the stump, and as the chicken held up each book, the frog said "readdit, readdit, readdit!"

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