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Dumb State Laws: Alabama

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  • Dumb State Laws: Alabama

    Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.

    Incestuous marriages are legal.

    It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.

    It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.

    It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of spooking horses

    It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.

    Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.

    It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.

    Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.

    Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.

    It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.

    You must have windshield wipers on your car.

    You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.


    Masks may not be worn in public.

    Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.

    It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
    .
    City Laws in Alabama
    Anniston
    You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street.

    Auburn
    No person may spit on the floor of a church.


    It is illegal to bike, roller-skate, skateboard, or inline skate in a commercially zoned area.

    Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail.

    Huntsville
    If an animal control officer is in uniform, it signifies to the public that he is an animal control officer.

    Lee County
    It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday

    Mobile
    Women may not wear a ‘lewd dress’ in public.

    No one may use a ‘funk ball’ within the city limits.

    Bathing in city fountains is prohibited.

    No person within the city may possess confetti.

    It is illegal to spit orange peels on the sidewalk.

    ‘Spray String’ is banned.

    Most locales do not have this problem, but Mobile found it necessary to ban bicycles from the interstate highways.

    If one wishes to read palms in the city, they must first pay $10 for a permit.

    It is illegal to howl at ladies within the city limits.

    It is unlawful to wear women’s pumps with sharp, high heels.

    Montgomery
    It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of spooking horses.
    http://www.customerssuck.com/?m=20080203

    My destiny is not pretty, but it's what my cutie mark is telling me.

  • #2
    What is a funk ball?

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    • #3
      A stinnk bomb. Full text of law.
      "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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      • #4
        No person within the city may possess confetti.
        Then the city jails must be uber crowded during Mardi Gras.
        "Imagine that. Human souls, trapped like flies in the World Wide Web, stuck forever, crying out for help."-The Doctor
        "Isn't that basically Twitter?"-Clara

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        • #5
          Quoth HappyFun Ball View Post
          Incestuous marriages are legal.
          I guess Weird Al was right!
          I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
          My LiveJournal
          A page we can all agree with!

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          • #6
            Quoth HappyFun Ball View Post
            Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.
            Now, do they mean a match between two bears, or one between a man and a bear?
            "We were put on this Earth to fart around, and don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise." -Kurt Vonnegut

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