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A friend of mine had recently decided to leave Key West. For Lily, the island was simply not working out. An old friend of hers, David, had told her he'd come down and help her move up to mainland Florida, where he'd have a place for her to stay until she got on her feet, and he'd even arranged a bartending gig for her.
A little background: Lily and David had been friends as kids, and had had a brief romance when she was 13 and he was 14. Due to family moves, they had not seen each other in eleven years, until a few months ago when he happened to be in Key West and ran into her, and recognized her from all those years ago, and they reconnected. To her, he was a great platonic friend, and, as she said, her best friend.
Last week, quite to her surprise, Lily got romantically involved with a great guy here in a Key West who she had known since she arrived here years ago. It was a surprise to both Lily and Jeff, apparently, as they had both had interest but neither had acted on it in all that time, nor known of the other one's interest. And, while Lily still planned to move, for the time at least, she and Jeff were both very happy spending time together. So much so that they agreed that, if she had been staying, this would be a boyfriend-girlfriend situation. Being friends with both of them, it was adorable and heart-warming for me to watch this all play out.
So David and his friend Karl arrived in town Friday. Karl was there because David had neither a license nor a vehicle, and Karl had offered or been talked into providing his truck and his driving for the move. The plan was to meet up with them, have a few drinks at a few bars, and then in the morning get Lily all packed up and she'd leave for the mainland with David and Karl. A bit bittersweet for Jeff and Lily, but it would be a nice night.
That was the idea. Sadly, it was not the reality. We, along with Lily's roommate Christopher, met up with David and Karl at a bar, and it started out that way, with all of us drinking and buying rounds. Well, almost all. David was drinking, but he was noticeable in his lack of ever reaching for his wallet. Even Lily, despite being unemployed, bought a round. David never even offered. Bartenders like myself notice such things.
Had he just been a cheap fucker, it would have been one thing. But sadly, it got worse. David knew full well about Lily and Jeff, because Lily had told him about it on the phone, and she looked forward to the two of them meeting. After a few rounds, though, Mr. Cheapo asked to speak to Jeff outside of the bar. Jeff happily went along. He did not come back quite so happy.
David gave Jeff a whole speech of how Jeff shouldn't worry about Lily, how she'd be safe up on the mainland, David would look out for her, etc. About what Jeff expected from all Lily had told us about David. But then things got weird. David started telling Jeff he needed to back off, to respect Lily and David's "relationship," to understand what was coming, blah blah fucking blah. Fucknugget also told Jeff to tone down the public kissing between Jeff and Lily. (Which honestly wasn't really all that bad. Cute and sweet, but not obnoxious PDAs.) In short, the little shit made it abundantly clear that as far as he was concerned, he was the new love in Lily's life, and Jeff needed to step the fuck off.
This threw Jeff for a loop, as you might imagine. He came back in the bar looking shell shocked, and we were all confused as to what the hell had transpired. Lily asked him what had happened, but he simply told her that she should ask David. So then she stepped outside with David, and found out for the first time what David's actual intentions were....AFTER he had told Jeff, mind you. Real classy there, bro.
Lily went ballistic, and chewed David a new one, making it damn clear that she and him were just friends, and that he was the one that needed to back off, and for that night at least, she was with Jeff, not him. Basically, he needed to shut the fuck up. She was far nicer than I would have been in that same situation with this fucktard, but despite the ass-chewing, David continued to be a prick most of the night, basically being a drama queen and diva about the whole thing, making things difficult for all of us, but especially for Jeff. Jeff, myself, and Christopher basically wanted to punch the motherfucker in the face, and we were all worried about what he might do that night, and how the move the next day would go. Jeff was hoping to convince Lily to stay, but as nice as he is, it seemed pretty unlikely. It was especially galling to me because Jeff is such a damn nice guy, and deserved romance and happiness far more than the greasy walking dick stain did.
The drama continued, with Karl finally deciding he'd had enough, and he went and slept in his truck. Personally, I felt bad for the guy, as this was clearly not what he had signed up for, and probably not the story that David had told him. The rest of us continued to deal with David's bullshit until the wee hours, close to 5 am. Much to David's chagrin, Lily stuck to her guns and went home with Jeff. And I've gotta tell you, as a vindictive asshole, I found David's bitter scowl as a reaction to that so completely and thoroughly enjoyable. And Christopher and I debated for a long time whether or not we should still beat the douchebag's ass silly, but we decided that that might not be a good idea, not just for the potential legal ramifications, but because whatever we thought of this prick, he was still someone Lily considered a friend. Why, I have no fucking clue. Lucky for him, too, because this was just the most blatant attempt at manipulative bullshit I've seen in a while, and I am not fan of manipulative bullshit, especially when it involves my friends. Fucker. Obviously no one had told him that Thou Shalt Not Fuck With Jester's Friends If Thou Wanteth To Continue Having Full Use Of Thine Legs.
Yesterday, Lily did go through with the move, and left the island with David and Karl. Jeff was devastated, and proceeded to drink most of the day, with myself and other friends of his keeping him company and providing moral support throughout the day at various bars. And this guy, who I'd never seen cry, wiped tears from his eyes on multiple occasions. It about broke MY heart to see it. And he finally went home to bed when he'd had more than his share of alcohol.
Those two days showed me the best and the worst in people. The best were Lily and Jeff, in so many ways. Hell, what can I say? I'm a romantic!
The worst was clearly David, with his lousy behavior and betrayal of his friendship with Lily, which easily earned him my Go Fuck Yourself Award for the weekend. Still pissed about the whole thing.
A little background: Lily and David had been friends as kids, and had had a brief romance when she was 13 and he was 14. Due to family moves, they had not seen each other in eleven years, until a few months ago when he happened to be in Key West and ran into her, and recognized her from all those years ago, and they reconnected. To her, he was a great platonic friend, and, as she said, her best friend.
Last week, quite to her surprise, Lily got romantically involved with a great guy here in a Key West who she had known since she arrived here years ago. It was a surprise to both Lily and Jeff, apparently, as they had both had interest but neither had acted on it in all that time, nor known of the other one's interest. And, while Lily still planned to move, for the time at least, she and Jeff were both very happy spending time together. So much so that they agreed that, if she had been staying, this would be a boyfriend-girlfriend situation. Being friends with both of them, it was adorable and heart-warming for me to watch this all play out.
So David and his friend Karl arrived in town Friday. Karl was there because David had neither a license nor a vehicle, and Karl had offered or been talked into providing his truck and his driving for the move. The plan was to meet up with them, have a few drinks at a few bars, and then in the morning get Lily all packed up and she'd leave for the mainland with David and Karl. A bit bittersweet for Jeff and Lily, but it would be a nice night.
That was the idea. Sadly, it was not the reality. We, along with Lily's roommate Christopher, met up with David and Karl at a bar, and it started out that way, with all of us drinking and buying rounds. Well, almost all. David was drinking, but he was noticeable in his lack of ever reaching for his wallet. Even Lily, despite being unemployed, bought a round. David never even offered. Bartenders like myself notice such things.
Had he just been a cheap fucker, it would have been one thing. But sadly, it got worse. David knew full well about Lily and Jeff, because Lily had told him about it on the phone, and she looked forward to the two of them meeting. After a few rounds, though, Mr. Cheapo asked to speak to Jeff outside of the bar. Jeff happily went along. He did not come back quite so happy.
David gave Jeff a whole speech of how Jeff shouldn't worry about Lily, how she'd be safe up on the mainland, David would look out for her, etc. About what Jeff expected from all Lily had told us about David. But then things got weird. David started telling Jeff he needed to back off, to respect Lily and David's "relationship," to understand what was coming, blah blah fucking blah. Fucknugget also told Jeff to tone down the public kissing between Jeff and Lily. (Which honestly wasn't really all that bad. Cute and sweet, but not obnoxious PDAs.) In short, the little shit made it abundantly clear that as far as he was concerned, he was the new love in Lily's life, and Jeff needed to step the fuck off.
This threw Jeff for a loop, as you might imagine. He came back in the bar looking shell shocked, and we were all confused as to what the hell had transpired. Lily asked him what had happened, but he simply told her that she should ask David. So then she stepped outside with David, and found out for the first time what David's actual intentions were....AFTER he had told Jeff, mind you. Real classy there, bro.
Lily went ballistic, and chewed David a new one, making it damn clear that she and him were just friends, and that he was the one that needed to back off, and for that night at least, she was with Jeff, not him. Basically, he needed to shut the fuck up. She was far nicer than I would have been in that same situation with this fucktard, but despite the ass-chewing, David continued to be a prick most of the night, basically being a drama queen and diva about the whole thing, making things difficult for all of us, but especially for Jeff. Jeff, myself, and Christopher basically wanted to punch the motherfucker in the face, and we were all worried about what he might do that night, and how the move the next day would go. Jeff was hoping to convince Lily to stay, but as nice as he is, it seemed pretty unlikely. It was especially galling to me because Jeff is such a damn nice guy, and deserved romance and happiness far more than the greasy walking dick stain did.
The drama continued, with Karl finally deciding he'd had enough, and he went and slept in his truck. Personally, I felt bad for the guy, as this was clearly not what he had signed up for, and probably not the story that David had told him. The rest of us continued to deal with David's bullshit until the wee hours, close to 5 am. Much to David's chagrin, Lily stuck to her guns and went home with Jeff. And I've gotta tell you, as a vindictive asshole, I found David's bitter scowl as a reaction to that so completely and thoroughly enjoyable. And Christopher and I debated for a long time whether or not we should still beat the douchebag's ass silly, but we decided that that might not be a good idea, not just for the potential legal ramifications, but because whatever we thought of this prick, he was still someone Lily considered a friend. Why, I have no fucking clue. Lucky for him, too, because this was just the most blatant attempt at manipulative bullshit I've seen in a while, and I am not fan of manipulative bullshit, especially when it involves my friends. Fucker. Obviously no one had told him that Thou Shalt Not Fuck With Jester's Friends If Thou Wanteth To Continue Having Full Use Of Thine Legs.
Yesterday, Lily did go through with the move, and left the island with David and Karl. Jeff was devastated, and proceeded to drink most of the day, with myself and other friends of his keeping him company and providing moral support throughout the day at various bars. And this guy, who I'd never seen cry, wiped tears from his eyes on multiple occasions. It about broke MY heart to see it. And he finally went home to bed when he'd had more than his share of alcohol.
Those two days showed me the best and the worst in people. The best were Lily and Jeff, in so many ways. Hell, what can I say? I'm a romantic!
The worst was clearly David, with his lousy behavior and betrayal of his friendship with Lily, which easily earned him my Go Fuck Yourself Award for the weekend. Still pissed about the whole thing.
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