I have had enough!

[Kanalah]

We have a realtor! We're looking in an area about a half hour away on the highway.

I also need a new phone, so why not a new number too.

[catcul]

We have a realtor! We're looking in an area about a half hour away on the highway.

I also need a new phone, so why not a new number too.

You could just block your family's phone calls.

[csquared]

Port your number to Google voice. Then you can use Google voice to call them (they see the old number), that is assuming you would call them. Then put it on do not disturb so any calls to you go straight to voice mail.

[mathnerd]

The best thing I ever did for myself and my kids was move 3000 miles away, change my phone number and not tell anybody where I was going. It's been 2.5 years and the resulting peace is amazing.

Editing to add a few things:

Be prepared for the drama to get worse. Your parents will likely send "flying monkeys" to talk you into re-establishing contact with them if you go no-contact. They will sell their "poor pity me" act to all their friends and the rest of your family. Some of them will buy it and call you to tell you how horrible you're being. It has the potential to get nasty. I wouldn't tell *anybody* your new address until they've proved that they're not going to pass information along to your parents. I tested my siblings and they failed. I cut them off too.

In some of your posts its seems like yours could be as bad as mine. My parents drove *three hours* to harass Jester at his place of employment regarding my whereabouts. Narcissistic people will do anything to "win". Just a word of warning.

[taxguykarl]

I don't hate to say it. I agree completely. Calling your mom and dad toxic is an understatementcompliment.

Corrected for your convenience.

My parents drove *three hours* to harass Jester at his place of employment regarding my whereabouts. Narcissistic people will do anything to "win". Just a word of warning.

This sounds the makings of another thread; I've heard of stalkers but that one may take the cake. Do tell that tale, if you haven't already.

[Kanalah]

I'm fully aware that they're going to go full "How dare she be ungrateful!". I went no contact before when Hubs and I were homeless. I only had contact with them again because I was pregnant and I thought they needed to know.

As far as I'm concerned, they brought it on themselves when they made me the scapegoat. They made it very clear that I was the source of everything bad in their lives, so why the hell would I want to stick around for that?

I feel like I'm doing them a favor.

[Marmalady]

I feel like I'm doing them a favor.

No, hun, you're doing yourself the favour, and not before time.

You said it yourself, they made you the scapegoat. They won't be happy that they've lost the ability to prick and tease and torment you. They won't be pleased that they haven't got the convenient person to blame any more, that they now have to take responsibility for any bad choices they made or chances they didn't take. Pulling your strings is what they do, and you cutting them spoils their game.

But it's them or you, Kanalah, and it has to be you.

[mathnerd]

This sounds the makings of another thread; I've heard of stalkers but that one may take the cake. Do tell that tale, if you haven't already.

Nah, not really thread-worthy. Shortly after I took off from Florida my parents started harassing my friends mostly through FB messenger. The few friends who knew where I was stonewalled them. Jester may or may not have been in the know at that time, but they certainly were convinced that he was. Anyway, they live on the southern tip of mainland Florida and took the time to actually go to Key West, go to his bar, and harass him with questions. He being a career bartender is quite skilled at dealing with bullies who are trying to intimidate, so he just skillfully sent them on their way.

[Crossbow]

that they now have to take responsibility for any bad choices they made or chances they didn't take.

No, they won't, I'm afraid. People that are used to blaming a scapegoat will just find another one when their chosen target isn't available. Taking responsibility for their actions won't even enter into their thought process, because it can't possibly be their fault. The concept is as alien to them as walking with 13 legs is to us. Best to hope for is that they choose each other as the scapegoats and don't hurt someone else along the way.

[mjr]

No, they won't, I'm afraid. People that are used to blaming a scapegoat will just find another one when their chosen target isn't available. Taking responsibility for their actions won't even enter into their thought process, because it can't possibly be their fault. The concept is as alien to them as walking with 13 legs is to us. Best to hope for is that they choose each other as the scapegoats and don't hurt someone else along the way.

When I was in High School, I played football (American football). Well, once after I'd graduated, my mother tried to play the "I went to your games!" card.

I guess because she did, and my dad didn't make most of them...

[Kanalah]

Oh yeah, Dad will say that Mom is the abusive one and vice versa. Because they don't make mistakes or doing anything wrong, it's always someone else's fault.

And I don't really call them on the phone. Mom will text sometimes, and if I feel like responding I will.

I am just tired of being their unpaid therapist and whipping girl. Seriously every fight they've been in, they both come in and bother me about it. Right now Mom is sueing Dad over his retirement money and Dad wants me to testify that Mom didn't live up to the divorce agreeement. He's not asking sis to testify, just me. I realized that I've been their therapist for my entire life and dammit I'm tired of it.

[mjr]

Oh yeah, Dad will say that Mom is the abusive one and vice versa. Because they don't make mistakes or doing anything wrong, it's always someone else's fault.

And I don't really call them on the phone. Mom will text sometimes, and if I feel like responding I will.

I am just tired of being their unpaid therapist and whipping girl. Seriously every fight they've been in, they both come in and bother me about it. Right now Mom is sueing Dad over his retirement money and Dad wants me to testify that Mom didn't live up to the divorce agreeement. He's not asking sis to testify, just me. I realized that I've been their therapist for my entire life and dammit I'm tired of it.

You should be sick of it, Kanalah. I would have pulled my hair out already. You're doing the right thing. If your parents can't behave themselves, that's really something you don't want to be involved with.

I got ticked at my mother once, because I called her and she answered the phone "Who is this??"

And another thing she did was tear me a new one when I called her from the hospital after my wife gave birth to our son. Because I didn't call her and tell her we were going to the hospital, and I didn't call her before our son was born.

Then, when she gets there, she stays for a bit, and falls asleep in a chair.

[Marmalady]

No, they won't, I'm afraid. People that are used to blaming a scapegoat will just find another one when their chosen target isn't available.

*sighs* I guess that's true.

On the other hand, whoever they choose as their new scapegoat, the important thing is it won't be Kanalah. Can't worry about them; can and do worry about Kanalah.

[Crossbow]

*sighs* I guess that's true.

On the other hand, whoever they choose as their new scapegoat, the important thing is it won't be Kanalah. Can't worry about them; can and do worry about Kanalah.

Amen to that.

[Kanalah]

Awww you guys

They will probably still blame me for everything bad in their lives but at least I won't be around to hear it.

Looking at more houses today. Fingers crossed that I find a good one. I'm hoping for my own sewing room.