Human Pinata, or How to Be a "Man."

[MMATM]

Have the event. Somewhere. Ditching all the plans just lets BB win, again, and if anyone deserves to be sore about the whole thing, it's him.

Also, hire (or ask for volunteers) some burly guys (and/or girls) to bounce for you. Preferably with some sort of advantage (e.g. mace, nightstick if they're cops/security guards, but no guns or anything deliberately lethal) in case BB and/or company show up looking for trouble.

Next, throw out anyone who acts up like those two brainless fuckers. No warning. And if they resist (meaning as soon as they touch anyone, meaning literally anyone, shout "assault" and then self defense laws come into play, so physically removing them from the property becomes legal) throw them out in the literal sense. Also have them banned both from wherever you hold the event (preferably somewhere that has some prior connection to TD or friends) as well as The Bar, for life.

Call the police and inform them of the behavior, as well as the identities of the two aforementioned brainless fuckers. If there's any security footage (unlikely but hey, you never know) use that to get them nailed for public indecency and anything else you can. Also tell them that you suspect some similar behavior on [date of event] at [time of event] at [place of event] because they're deliberately antagonizing certain people and those people are scheduled to be there.

No matter what happens, make sure that you aren't the only one doing something for TD. Make sure there is an event, make sure it's well-known and widespread, at least among TD's friends, and make sure it stings BB to know that the women's advocacy group is in on the celebration so everyone knows about him.

Remember that you don't have to do all of this yourself. Enlist some equally-devoted and un-intimidated friends and have them do some of the required work.

[MMATM]

Finally (with nods to Kusanagi or whoever pioneered this style), talk to A. Try and convince her that she's a fucking idiot / severely misguided / next on BB's list, and that she should get as far away from him as possible / kill him herself / lure him to a dark, out-of-the-way place near a convenient jetty. Also, tell her that her bashing of TD is out of line / insignificant next to BB's offenses / all of the above and that she should try to think about what TD and her friends went through / go get involved with someone so evil she'd hang herself to get out of it / just go hang herself, period. Lastly, remind her that BB is a manipulator / evil / abusive / the scum of the earth / on [insert deity here]'s shit-list for eternity / just going to do it again / all of the above and that if she really wants to take his side, she's also not welcome at the event for TD / she is no longer your friend / she should date BB, seeing as he's such a "great guy" / you will accept that and might be there for her when and if she's ever abused by BB or some other abusive dickwad.

Disclaimer: CS.com does not condone violence. Obviously there is/are a "correct" answer/answers to each of the above choices. No violence should be attempted or committed as a result, either directly or indirectly, of this or the previous post. -MMATM

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Sadly, there will always be people like BB around.

And even sadder, there will always be people like A around. Which is almost worse.

[MMATM]

And even sadder, there will always be people like A around. Which is worse.

Edited for the sad truthfulness.

[Jester]

A. is actually, as I said, a very nice person. She is just misguided, as she has been fooled by BB. Remember, as an abusive manipulator, he is by definition used to making people think he is something he is not. A. is actually doing what she thinks is right, which is what makes all of this so much worse. Please don't judge her too harshly.

As for the rest....I am still too bitter and disspirited to comment on the rest of it. We'll see what happens tomorrow. Maybe we'll get lucky and BB will walk in front of a Greyhound bus.

[Eireann]

Is it possible you can go to the police, explain what's going on, and have a restraining order issued against BB and his toadies? That way, if they tried to crash your event, they'd get arrested.

And doesn't BB already have a criminal record? This wouldn't look good, to have him arrested for stalking his late girlfriend's former coworkers.

[Jester]

Please excuse my post from last night. I was obviously not in my right mind.

We will have a memorial. We will raise funds for animals in TD's name. We will do this, and we will not tolerate any troublemakers. We are going to hammer out the details, but this will happen.

A couple of my coworkers last night told me that it is just not realistic for me to think that we are going to be able to do this. I respectfully disagree. Do I expect BB and/or his friends to attempt to cause trouble? I would be shocked if they didn't. We will deal with it at the time. I am not about to let this idiot and his friends dictate what I do in my life. Period. End of story. He may think he can control everything and everyone, but he is woefully mistaken, and is seriously underestimating me. I am not about to hide from him or bury my head in the sand for fear of what he may or may not do.

In short: fuck him.

[Rahmota]

In short: fuck him.

Somehow I dont think you'd want to try that. I dont think they make a condom in stainless steel.

But I am not surprised by all this either. Good luck with things and hope it works out for the best for everyone involved.

[morgana]

In short: fuck him.

Rather not, thanks. Although pouring mare musk on him and introducing him to my ex-neighbor's prize Clydesdale stallion might prove amusing.

On a different note: Jester, you have my undying respect. Don't let the bastard keep you from honoring your friend. Don't get yourself arrested, and please gods don't get yourself killed, but stand your ground.

I wonder what A's reaction would be upon learning of the scumbags' action?

I wonder what her reaction would be if BB's actions at the memorial (or those of his 'friends') was videotaped and shown to her?

If he's got her this snowed, probably just more excuses. But it might be worth hoping about.

[Emrld]

Jester - get a copy of the book "Gift of Fear" and give a copy to A
(yes, this was just once again on Oprah - but there is truth to how our body will tell us something isn't right and we will ignore our fear, which puts us in danger)

[monolayth]

if they do show up i suggest that the mc tell everyone so they can all point and laugh at them or something equally humilating.

[MMATM]

Please excuse my post from last night. I was obviously not in my right mind.

No worries, Jester. It was late and I imagine you were too tired to deal with it. We (or at least I, but I think I speak for most of CS.com here as well) aren't about to lose faith in you doing what you know is right. You've proven that much.

Best of luck. And the contact offer still stands.

[Jester]

Don't let the bastard keep you from honoring your friend. Don't get yourself arrested, and please gods don't get yourself killed, but stand your ground.

I wonder what A's reaction would be upon learning of the scumbags' action?

I wonder what her reaction would be if BB's actions at the memorial (or those of his 'friends') was videotaped and shown to her?

I am not about to let him from keeping me, or any of her other friends, from honoring her, remembering her, and celebrating her life. The memorial will go on. I will not get arrested (done that enough in my life, thanks), I will not (hopefully) get killed (though I do expect at some point threats of violence or violence itself against me), and I am not about to let this waste of carbon tell me what I can or cannot do.

I AM going to drop having the domestic abuse people there, not because he wants me to do so, but just so he and his friends have nothing to bitch about or cause a scene about. What, you don't think we should honor the memory of your girlfriend? What, you don't think we should raise money for animals, that your girlfriend loved? Yeah, how silly do you look?

I plan on showing A. a copy of the police report and the doctor's medical report, both of which are being sent to me by her parents.

As for BB and his friends at the memorial, they are not invited. Not just because *I* don't want them there, but because her family doesn't want him there. Chew on that, asswipe. You want to be at her memorial? Put one together yourself. (Note: something tells me a) he will show up anyway, b) he will not bother donating a thing to the ASPCA, and c) he will do something stupid, embarrassing, disrespectful, or a combination of the above.

if they do show up i suggest that the mc tell everyone so they can all point and laugh at them or something equally humilating.

I plan on going to the memorial fully armed.





With water guns.


Yep, someone acts up, I squirt them. Damn it, this is going to be a POSITIVE and FUN event honoring a sweet girl. If I have to use silliness to prevent someone from being an ass, I will.

Oh, that and we'll have a couple of large burly guys to remove any real problems.


Small update: it seems that the battery charges against BB from December were never dropped, and he was actually supposed to be in court this morning for arraignment on said charges. Not sure what the status of all that is, as it is all still murky, but the family is working with the appropriate agencies here to attempt to continue the prosecution on those charges. This was much needed good news to us today.

[MMATM]

Small update: it seems that the battery charges against BB from December were never dropped, and he was actually supposed to be in court this morning for arraignment on said charges. Not sure what the status of all that is, as it is all still murky, but the family is working with the appropriate agencies here to attempt to continue the prosecution on those charges. This was much needed good news to us today.

HUZZAH!

That's excellent news! With any luck, BB will still feel the dry, uncomfortable, penetrating sensation so deserved by his ilk. Didn't somebody mention OJ Simpson before, and say something about a civil suit against BB? If not, someone should. Though that'd be a lot of time and effort and you'd need a real lawyer who knew all the details to be able to judge if there was a chance of winning.

Anyhow, good luck with A. Here's hoping that she comes around.

[Jester]

Bad news: Stepdad found out today that the battery charges against BB have been dropped, despite assurance from one of the agencies involved that it would be pursued. He is planning on asking a LOT of questions on that one.

Talked to him tonight while I've been making salsa.