akward question

[Bella_Vixen]

MOAO has cancer. Serious stage 4 cancer. He is far away from me, in a care home.

My question is, how do I ask him if/when/how I will be notified if the worst happens?

I pray that it doesn't come to that, but the odds are pretty bad.

[RootedPhoenix]

*many many hugs*

I don't have an answer for you. Maybe someone else does. But I know you'll need *hugs* and *hugs* and some *hugs*.

I've always got a listening ear.

[Shpepper]

Since I don't know the whole situation, I am going to give a couple options.

You can ask a relative of his to please keep you informed.

You can ask him to have the staff in the home where he is let you know, if that's an option.

Perhaps there is a friend you have in common who is where he is who can keep you updated.


Best of luck to your OAO. And hugs for you. Good luck to you both.

[Becks]

*oodles of hugs*

I wish I knew, Lizziebeff.

[Bella_Vixen]

Thanks for the hugs, everyone.

Since I don't know the whole situation, I am going to give a couple options.

You can ask a relative of his to please keep you informed.

You can ask him to have the staff in the home where he is let you know, if that's an option.

Perhaps there is a friend you have in common who is where he is who can keep you updated.


Best of luck to your OAO. And hugs for you. Good luck to you both.

He doesn't really get along with his family, and as far as I know, none of them have my contact info, and we don't have any friends in common.

I'll try to work up the courage to have him have the nurses contact me.


He's hoping to come home in July, which I am praying for by the hour.


Here's to shot #4 of Tequila Rose in ½ an hour.

[Rapscallion]

My question is, how do I ask him if/when/how I will be notified if the worst happens?

If you can talk to him and he's fully accepting that the inevitable may come soon, then just ask him. Something like, "How will I know when you're getting better?" Keep it positive.

If he's in denial, he'll probably say he'll let you know when he's out. If he's accepting of the future then he'll probably make some sort of arrangement to let you know of a worsening situation.

Rapscallion

[Bella_Vixen]

Thanks Raps.

He's fully accepting of the situation, more so then I am. I'm going to IM/email him and ask.


*sigh*

[Shpepper]

I like what Raps said. Keep it on the positive side and go from there. These are sometimes the hardest things to talk about but often the most important. *HUGS*

[Bella_Vixen]

I asked. I'm listed in his living will.

As of now, when he comes back, he'll be moving back into his old house that his brother took over from him. He and his family tend to have a tolerate/ignore relationship.

[Shpepper]

I'm glad you have your answer.

[Bella_Vixen]

Thanks all.

I'm glad I finally asked him. It's something I've been meaning to ask for quite some time, but how can I ask when he's relatively healthy, you know? I get the feeling he's surprised that it took me so long to ask.




I'm drinking in his honor tonight. Tonight is Baileys for me and some form of Vodka for him. If I decide to drag out the vodka, anyways...

[Becks]

Damn, Lizziebeff, you should've told me you were drinking in his honor. I would've had some shots and tried to choke down some vodka, too.

Who cares if I work today? I feel slightly craptacular anyway, a hangover wouldn't add too much pain.

[Bella_Vixen]

Becks, you can do the honors tonight.

[Becks]

You didn't say anything when I was actually at your house so...Thursday night, I suppose.

[Bella_Vixen]

Update: He's given me a specific date for coming home.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!



I miss him soooooooooooooo much.