Tragedy

[Bella_Vixen]

*hugs and prayers*

[Rapscallion]

Any update?

Rapscallion

[Geek King]

Aw, geez. I just saw this. Jester, you and Princess are in my prayers and good thoughts.

[Dips]

I'm am so sorry. A sudden death like that is a terrible and jarring shock. I'll keep everyone in my prayers.

[Jester]

I got back from north Florida 36 hours ago or so, and have either been sleeping, working, or too exhausted to update this.

I shall do so later tonight or tomorrow, as I am (once again) off to work.

[Shpepper]

Thank you for letting us know that you made it there and back safely.

[Peppergirl]

Im so sorry, Jester.

I wish I'd read this earlier, as I'm currently in north/central Florida at my parents. I could have offered you a meal or a drink, at least, if it was on your route.

My condolences...and I hope Princess will be alright.

[Jester]

The trip....

I promised y'all I would update you, and so here I go.

Last Tuesday, I went to work my day shift as normal, figuring that after work I would go home, pack, have some dinner, and hit the road for north Florida. I was looking at a 9-10 hour drive (530 miles), but I am a night owl and, leaving at that hour, I was unlikely to encounter any traffic anywhere. Well, work was uneventful, and when I got home I did eat and pack, but got delayed somewhat doing some computer/google searching for a particular pastor that Princess and her family wanted for the funeral, a fellow who had known her Daddy and been a pastor at their church. Good news: we think we found him, in a town not that far away. Bad news: while we were pretty sure we found him, based on his and his wife's names and birthdates, we could only find the address, not any phone numbers. And we had several people working on it. So, sadly, with so little time (the funeral was on Thursday), Princess went about finding another pastor.

I finally left at about 9 pm. The drive up was relatively uneventful. Oddly, though I am used to road trips, I was very sluggish for the first couple hours, until I finally gave in to necessity and had some caffeine. I am normally decaffeinated, but knew I would probably have to drink something along the way--I just didn't think I would have to do so so soon. But the good thing about this necessity is it allowed me the rare treat of a Dr. Pepper, which I do so love. A couple of those along the way, and I was doing relatively fine until Orlando, at which point I figured I was close to being done, and would just have to find a hotel somewhere down the road, preferably after the end of the turnpike in Ocala. But somehow I found a second win, and plowed on through to Smalltownsville, arriving at 6:30 am. Princess had told me to call her when I got there, but having talked to a barely conscious Princess at 3:30-4:00 am-ish, I decided to get a hotel room and not bother Princess. I also figured it would be better if I had my own little place to crash, rather than the couch at Princess's dad's (rather small) place. More good news: the hotel only charged me for Wednesday night, giving me Tuesday night (really Wednesday morning) for free. $40 for two "nights" in the hotel? Pretty decent deal. So I turned off my phone (a rare event for me) and fell promptly asleep.

I finally woke up at about 12:30, and turned on my phone to see that Princess had called and texted. They had been worried about me, having not heard from me. I called them, told them I was fine, and would be over as soon as I had lunch, having not had a real meal since Key West. Good news: Sonny's Barbecue is a wonderful chain, and I got a ridiculously good and big meal, chased down with a couple of cold ones, for amazingly cheaply. Arriving at Princess's, I started to feel rather useless. I was there to help with whatever they needed help with, but Princess and her Daddy's girlfriend Beverly were just going through stuff, none of which we (me, Princess's mom Abbey, or Abbey's father Cowboy) could really help with. So we just sat around providing moral and emotional support. Note: I HATE feeling useless, especially when I am somewhere to DO something, anything needed.

Now, a lot of the required Things To Do fell on Princess's shoulders. Why? Well, of Daddy's five children, she was the only adult one, being 18. His two ex-wives (Abbey and Beulah) and his girlfriend really didn't have much legal standing; though Abbey was the executor of Daddy's will, she stepped back and let Princess do much of the work, not out of laziness, but because Princess wanted to do it, and having Princess do it gave Beulah nothing to bitch about, as she almost certainly would have had Abbey been making the arrangements. And, after all, while Abbey only had a connection to Princess and Daddy, Princess not only loved her Daddy, but adored her four half-brothers and half-sisters, and Beulah knew this. I hope all of the above makes sense. (Note: I didn't have much, if any, interaction with Beulah, but Beverly was an absolute doll. I would dare to call her a virtual saint.)

After some running around for this and that, we all went down to meet up with Daddy's father, Princess's other grandfather, and his wife, and then everyone (me, Princess, Abbey, Cowboy, Beverly, her kids, the other grandparents, Beulah, her kids, Daddy's sister, and her kids) all gathered at a local chain restaurant for dinner and to discuss the plans for Thursday.

Finally, everyone disbursed, and I stopped in to a bar by my hotel for a few cold ones and to call my girlfriend, Nurse Betty, who was amazingly supportive.

Thursday morning started far earlier than I ever would have liked it to, but eventually I was showered, dressed, and checked out of my hotel room, and picked up Princess at her place to take her to the funeral home. Everyone was very supportive of Princess--being the oldest child, worshipping her dad, having just moved in with him for what was supposed to be just a semester of community college, AND having been home when the accident happened (so probably having witnessed her father's death), she was obviously distraught, though she held up better than many would, I suppose.

It was my first (and hopefully only) open casket funeral. I did not care for that particular aspect to it, but of course, that was not my choice. The creepiest part (for me) was that Daddy, who is about my age (I'm 39, he just turned 41), looked like he was about to just wake up and start laughing. Seriously, the morticians did an amazing job, all things considered. But if ever I had an questions about having a funeral, they ended Thursday. I shall be cremated, my ashes scattered, and my friends will gather for a going away party, NOT a funeral. There will be rock music playing and booze flowing, damn it. I will NOT be buried in the ground, or have a funeral, or ever, EVER, have an open casket. *shudder*

Daddy was a corrections officer at the local prison, and as such, there were well over a dozen of his coworkers and friends (i.e., cops) in attendance, including an 8-officer honor guard (they stood at semi-attention behind the casket) in the time leading up to the actual funeral service. The service was very sweet, and then everyone headed to Jacksonville (about an hour away) for the burial. Daddy was being buried in what I believe is a military cemetery (Jacksonville National Cemetery), and he got military honors, having served 8 years in the U.S. Navy. This involved four sailors in their dress whites standing at attention, one of whom played "Taps" at the appropriate time, and of course the whole flag ceremony, with Princess being presented with a U.S. flag, and Daddy's oldest son (who is 14) being presented with the flag that had lain on the casket. It was my first military funeral ceremony, and it was, considering the circumstances, amazingly beautiful. (I have never heard "Taps" played more soulfully or beautifully in my entire life.)

After that, we all went out to a late lunch at an Olive Garden (which was Princess and Daddy's "place") for dinner. At various times I had both of Princess's grandfathers thank me for all I had done for her, and for watching out for her, considering I was not her blood uncle. I have known Cowboy for years (his number's in my cell), but this was my first time meeting Princess's paternal grandfather, and it was nice to know he felt the same way about it. After doing some magic for the kids (at Princess's request), I finally left Jacksonville at about 5:15 for the long drive back to Key West. I finally got home to Key West at about 4:30 am, dead tired, and the last hour's drive I was almost senseless, having gone beyond what caffeine could carry me. But I struggled through, and even worked my 10 am opening shift at The Bar (though I did so dragging my ass horribly).

And now I would like to end all of this on some positive notes.

--I have made myself available to Princess and Beverly for any bureaucratic type thing they need to deal with over the coming weeks involving Daddy's stuff, accounts, etc. They have already availed of me once for this, and I hope they will again, as this will ease their burden.

--Princess, who was supposed to start her first semester of community college (she will probably be transferring to a university in the spring) last Monday (the day after her father was killed) started classes today. By all accounts, her professors have been very understanding. Which is good, as I would hate to have to travel up there to beat the living crap out of a community college professor.

--On the road trip home, I had dinner at a place I had seen on "Man vs. Food" and other shows, Primanti's. It is a well-known Pittsburgh chain, but they do have a couple of locations in Ft. Lauderdale. They are probably best known for their big sandwiches, which are served with fries and cole slaw. That in itself is not unusual, but Primanti's puts the fries and slaw right on the sandwich. While I am not a huge fry guy, and figured I would end up picking them off if I didn't like them, I did want to try it the original way my first time. So I ordered a pastrami and cheese, and wondered how the meat and cheese would hold up in the four hour trip to Key West if I didn't finish the monster sandwich. I needn't have worried. Not only did I LOVE the fries and slaw on the sandwich, I finished the whole damn sandwich, going so far as to get a fork with which to scoop up the sandwich's droppings. Anyone who finds themselves in Pittsburgh or Lauderdale, if you have never had a Primanti's sandwich, this is a MUST.