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  • My trip to Mental Health

    Soooooo....yeah, I came close to another mental breakdown today. So much so, I called my company's mental health benefit. I told them about what was going on and they directed me to the local mental health center. "And tell them it's an emergency." Umm...okay.

    I go as directed and talk to them. I tell the story again. This time, they tell me something odd. "You may be bipolar"

    ...WHAT?

    She told me all about it. I was incredulous but as she kept talking...it started to make sense. It would explain my bouts of rage and utter depression.

    I go back tomorrow to speak to a therapist and a psychiatrist. I could be put on medications.

    Here's the kicker: I told my parents. They told me they weren't surprised. I told my best friend. He said "I thought you knew." Even my wife told she had been suspecting it for awhile.

    I find it odd that everyone ELSE knew about this before me. Guess I was in denial.
    I have a...thing. Wanna see it?

  • #2
    Hey, it's ok.
    As long as you're facing it NOW, and you have a support group and some sort of plan, you're ok.

    Lithium has been used the longest for treating Bi Polar. You will need to find out if you're BP I or BP II - there are 2 kinds. And, you have insurance. It will help a LOT.

    *hugs* and chocolate.

    Cutenoob
    In my heart, in my soul, I'm a woman for rock & roll.
    She's as fast as slugs on barbituates.

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    • #3
      XD Dont worry. I'm on bipolor medicene myself. Among others. Some days I'm pretty happy, others I'm wishing I was dead and think of ways to get it over with, others I'm comsumed by such seething raw fury hatred towards everyone, that I lock myself in my room and go under a blanket with kitty cat.

      Depression isn't your fault. Just a chemical malfuction. Meds help. It still sucks. I look at my pills and wonder how long I'm forced to be on them.
      Military Spouse Support.
      http://www.customerssuck.com/board/group.php?groupid=45
      Plaidman's Minions: Telecom_Goddess: Dungeon Minion

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      • #4
        I've made peace with the fact that I will probably be on medication the rest of my life for bi-polar and a couple other things. I would suggest you keep your status to yourself where the job front is concerned. There is a bit if stigma to being bi-polar unfortunately.

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        • #5
          Quoth Akasa View Post
          I would suggest you keep your status to yourself where the job front is concerned. There is a bit of stigma to being bi-polar unfortunately.
          Quoted for emphasis. Also, feel better. Try whatever meds or therapy they want you to try, but don't be afraid to say something if you don't think it's working for you. Also, I'd suggest getting a small calender and jot down your moods every day - makes it a lot easier to track them over longer periods of time and see how well said meds are working. Good luck!

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          • #6
            Wow, bipolar is a pretty serious thing. I was diagnosed with it after 3 suicide attempts. Funny (or sad) it was on my 4th attempt that I almost did die. I was in the hospital for quite some time. It was only until I get treated correctly that I was feeling better.

            Make sure you stay on top of this, once it's treated properly, you'll feel better overall.
            When will the fantasy end? When will the heaven begin?

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            • #7
              One more thing:

              It's a 'just is' thing. Like the type of diabetes kids get that's genetic, that means they're on insulin for life. It just is.

              Once you get the correct meds, you'll find that you come out more, and the moods have less control over your thoughts & actions. It's kind of hard to explain, but you'll understand when it happens.

              Finding the right meds is a pain, though. They can't test the chemistry of your brain directly, so a lot of psych med prescribing is educated guesswork. And it can take weeks for psych meds to fully take effect, or fully stop working. So switching meds takes time.

              Be prepared for that. Be prepared for side effects during the uptake (or withdrawal) as well, that will probably go away after uptake.

              It IS worth it. But it's also bloody annoying while you're getting to the 'its worth it' stage.
              Seshat's self-help guide:
              1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
              2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
              3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
              4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

              "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

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              • #8
                I appreciate all the support you guys are giving me. It's helping me alot.

                Irony: I got into my car to go to my appointment for this. The first song on the radio: Basket Case by Green Day
                I have a...thing. Wanna see it?

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                • #9
                  ha Ha sort of.

                  I have a friend who's Bipolar, and she's definitely a bit *off* on the days she's cycling. Her cycles are tied to the moon, and so a wee bit before new moons, during and after new moons she's *off*. Even on meds.

                  But that's HER.

                  Your body/brain is a totally separate thing, and no 2 humans are alike - even twins. Neurology IS an artistic guess. Many of the newer anti-seizure drugs are now being used for Bipolar and other psych issues. Isn't that cool - that a drug can be used for more than just what it was created for? (think Viagra - it's origin wasn't for ED!)

                  Nurian, this is gonna be a long slow path for you. It took me over 7 years to find the right med and dosage for my epilepsy. A lot of that 7 years was me refusing to take the meds because they sucked. (and being a teen).
                  Please, make sure that you keep some kind of mood chart near a calendar or such. Like 1-10 scale. 1= death killing evil dark 10 = happy chirpy balanced day.....15 would be Manic.

                  Do this BEFORE you start your meds so you might find a body cycle in there. All the more statistical data you can throw at the doc the better. AND ask about B6 and B12 levels - those can help level out your general overall moods. You can pop B6 and B12 otc, alongside a psych med (ask first, but usually kosher) and it will help you process and learn to be yourself under control.

                  it's ok to be Bipolar. Ask your family about it - has anyone else in your fam tree shown signs of it? Anyone else schizophrenic? Epilepsy? OCD? Other neuro diseases? Some neuros think there's a genetic connection between these major neuro diseases. I know E can be passed gen to gen, and so can Depression...and Bipolar, but I dunno if there's a common ground for them ALL.

                  Also, watch your caffiene and sugar intakes. You're going to have to learn your body's signals a bit better - and listen to your gut! Gut knows! Heheh.

                  Hey, bonks from Fuzzy. She says it's ok to nap, cats nap all the time.

                  Hugs from me, cuz I know what it's like going back to a dr. every few weeks getting needled and asked questions over and over.....argh

                  Cutenoob
                  In my heart, in my soul, I'm a woman for rock & roll.
                  She's as fast as slugs on barbituates.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I'm actually considering a mental health 'checkup' myself because I seriously don't think it's OK for my average level of happiness to be as low as it is lately. There's also the whole fact that it feels like a lot of my social interaction is stuff I don't really understand, but have learned how to do by trial and error, but I doubt anything can be done to help that.
                    Long days, short nights, a bottle of NOS makes it all right.

                    Canadians Unite !

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                    • #11
                      So went to the doctor today and I got some good news: it's not bipolar disorder.

                      Turns out my symptoms were all a facet of depression. What's more, I should be able to treat this without medications.

                      This is a load off of stress off of me. It means I CAN get better and I CAN work....eventually.
                      I have a...thing. Wanna see it?

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