Who's dumb idea was that?

[Misanthropical]

We got a letter yesterday from the little guy's school. It said that the fifth grade teachers have all decided to not do a Secret Santa this year. The room parents tried to talk them into letting the Secret Santa stay. I mean, even my daughter had that in fifth grade and still has the gift. She loves it.

Instead, the room parents wanted the parents to buy presents for the teachers. Uhh NO! I dislike my little guy's teacher so much that I shake when I talk to her, not out of fear, but out of rage that I'm trying to hold back.

Someone suggested we do both. Which is great by me, but I don't think we should have to buy a present for a teacher who had no qualms about making sure the children couldn't get a gift from a classmate.

I haven't decided if I'm overreacting or what, so what do you guys think?

[Greenday]

Since when is it customary to give the teacher a gift? I mean, I did for a couple teachers, but that wasn't until I was older.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Personally, I don't like Secret Santa, nor do I like drawing names.

I will do it, but I don't like it.

But, whatever. This is your thing and not mine. And I get that you are not happy about it. And since it was this teacher's idea that your kid does not get to have his fun, the suggestion that SHE gets a gift instead is pretty rich.

I am with you. I would be pretty miffed as well, and I would probably say so to whoever made that harebrained suggestion.

If gifts are a bad idea, then they are a bad idea.

[Misanthropical]

I never bought a teacher a present till I was in high school and only because they were cool teachers to begin with.

My DH is trying to get the Secret Santa brought back in. He is also unhappy that only the teacher gets the presents. We both figure if they don't want the children to have any fun, why on earth would we go out of our way to let the teachers have fun?

I know that sometimes I miss seeing the big picture because I'm too close to the situation, so I ask you gys and you all come through for me with a thought I hadn't thought of.

Did I mention you guys are the coolest?

[AriGriffin]

I only had one class that had a $5 gift Secret Santa exchange. I drew my best friend so it was okay, but the person that got my name gave me a toy from a kid's meal. Anyway, the other classes I was in brought in non-perishable food or winter clothing instead of having a gift exchange. I usually gave my teachers handmade ornaments.

[jnd4rusty]

I think it is pretty selfish of the teacher!! Seriously, what teacher decides that she gets presents but not the children. I would raise a stink over this one, talk to the other parents, the principal, the school board! To me it sounds extremely unethical to reqest or demand presents from your student or their parents. Even if it was not the teacher's idea, just the very fact that they would go along with it is unethical, in my opinion.

[Soulstealer]

Since this is for kids to have fun I'm going to side with you. Maybe not everyone likes Secret Santas but it seems to be a school tradition that the kids look forward to and to take it away from them without a good reason is pretty mean. This is without even considering whether the teacher gets a gift, having them be the only ones getting something is a pretty douchy move. The gifts I gave to my professors and teachers were to the ones I liked when I was older. I know some parents will give gifts to teacher but it's still because they like her.

[RavenStarr]

Wonder if theres any way to find out which teacher came up with that idea.

[Kheldarson]

Since when is it customary to give the teacher a gift? I mean, I did for a couple teachers, but that wasn't until I was older.

I think it kind of depends on family background and stuff. My family does that, especially at the end of the year. The idea is that it's a thank you for their time and such. Because some teacher's spend a lot of extra time beyond their required duties helping students. So it's a small thank you. But it's never a requirement


But I agree, Mis. If they're not going to do a Secret Santa for the kids, why should you be required to give the teacher something? Especially if you hate the teacher...

[trailerparkmedic]

I know my mom gave some of my teachers end of the year gifts when they were extra awesome, but I can't get behind requiring gifts of any sort. I really dislike it when so many people are having money problems this year.

[RayvenQ]

I'd get that teacher a present alright, a lump of coal, and get her to unwrap it in front of everyone

[Broomjockey]

What the flying *$#!? No presents for the kids, but presents for the teachers? Assuming you've got different teachers for each subject (since you mentioned a math teacher), that means you'd be buying four or five presents for the teachers, instead of one for a kid. So they want to screw families over by making them buy more presents, and then the kids don't even get to have any fun. And then each teacher's getting dozens of presents. Even going on a "you only have to buy for one specific teacher" instead of all of them, they're still getting probably 20-30, depending on class size.

Yeah, no. Mis, kick some ass!

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Mis, I have to agree with several of the others here: it's a terrible idea and a selfish one as well.

Christmas is supposed to be about giving . . . not taking away from the children. Besides, Christmas is for kids - of all ages.

To take away a bit of the joy of being a kid at Christmas yet still wanting to give it instead to the teachers is selfish, assinine and greedy all in one.

I'd say find out whose brain fart this came out of and give them a sound piece of your mind. I see no point in forcing parents or students to participate in this farce.

[Seshat]

Adults should get presents from people who choose to give them presents, not those who feel obligated to.

Children - that's a different matter. I think the kids should either do a Secret Santa type thing, or a charity thing. Or a crafts thing - making gifts for each other.

If the 'gift to the teachers' thing does end up being a 'must-do'; give all your kids craft supplies and have them make something for their teachers. The must-do teacher gets a gift they can't refuse without looking sucky, and the other teachers get a gift too.

Well, that's my advice, anyway.

[Megg]

In my little world, there is no such thing as a "must-do" in this situation. I would not, under any circumstances, buy a gift for that teacher. Some cupcakes for the kids, or something, of course, but she can take her gimmie grab and shove it right up her ... nose.

I hope you get this straightened out, it seems really greedy and selfish of the teacher. If the kids choose not to do it, that's one thing, but for her to dictate such a thing ... man, it makes me angry, and it isn't even my kid!