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I've not been sleeping a lot here lately. Tomorrow marks the 34th week of my wife's pregnancy. This is the farthest we've ever gotten, and it's the third pregnancy. Last spring, two days after the spring semester of school started, my wife suffered some health complications, and she was 19 weeks pregnant. The baby was delivered early, and only lived four hours. That was the second pregnancy. The first pregnancy, my wife became pregnant with twins. One of them died at seven weeks, and the other twin died at nine weeks. This baby seems to be going strong -- consistently strong heartrate, good size measurements, and acceptable levels of physical activity -- we are very grateful that the third time seems to be the charm. However, my wife has been having issues with her blood pressure in the last month, and has been diagnosed with preeclampsia. As the doctor put it, she is a ticking time bomb, and the only cure is to deliver the baby. They want to try to get her to 37 weeks, so we have three weeks of hospitalization if it goes that long. She's been on strict bed rest since this issue has developed. It's a long time to not have my wife at home, and it's a long time to only rely on my income as I'm a full-time college student trying to earn my degree while working my convenience store and work-study jobs. I'm posting this mainly as an outlet because I'm feeling overwhelmed trying to keep up with running the household, going to school and finding time to study, and keep everything else going for us. I know that I'm not alone, other people have been there and done that, too, and that it's possible to make it all work. I'm just feeling worn out at the moment from everything.
Also, I guess I'm still reeling from a bad semester last semester at school. I had no issues like health or family issues last semester, but I did put myself in a position of working more hours between my c-store and work-study jobs than I should have. I thought I could handle it, but I wore myself down. I ended up getting sick from sleep deprivation and not eating properly by the end of the semester, and went through a minor burnout by the time finals week hit. My grades were passing, but not my usual level for last semester. I've been kicking myself for that, but I did learn a valuable lesson about not putting too many irons in the fire since I do have a tendency to get involved in too many projects at once. Most of the time, it's just projects regarding personal interests, so there are no real consequences beyond just not finishing personal projects that I start.
I guess I just needed to vent a little. The only plus seems to be that I'm almost completely numb to the usual annoyances of sucky customers because I've just retreated that far into my own world even when at work. None of it seems to really matter to me either way, and I find myself indifferently just going through the motions while working at the c-store.
Also, I guess I'm still reeling from a bad semester last semester at school. I had no issues like health or family issues last semester, but I did put myself in a position of working more hours between my c-store and work-study jobs than I should have. I thought I could handle it, but I wore myself down. I ended up getting sick from sleep deprivation and not eating properly by the end of the semester, and went through a minor burnout by the time finals week hit. My grades were passing, but not my usual level for last semester. I've been kicking myself for that, but I did learn a valuable lesson about not putting too many irons in the fire since I do have a tendency to get involved in too many projects at once. Most of the time, it's just projects regarding personal interests, so there are no real consequences beyond just not finishing personal projects that I start.
I guess I just needed to vent a little. The only plus seems to be that I'm almost completely numb to the usual annoyances of sucky customers because I've just retreated that far into my own world even when at work. None of it seems to really matter to me either way, and I find myself indifferently just going through the motions while working at the c-store.
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